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The Politician -- A story for out time.
Private E-mail | July 1, 2003 | Unknown

Posted on 07/01/2003 7:52:19 AM PDT by Taxman

Subject: The Politician

While walking down the street one day, a politician is tragically hit by a truck and dies. His soul arrives in heaven and is met by St. Peter at the entrance. "Welcome to Heaven," says St. Peter. "Before you settle in, it seems there is a problem. We seldom see a high official around these parts, you see, so we're not sure what to do with you."

"No problem, just let me in," he says aloofly.

"Well, I'd like to, but I have orders from higher up. What we'll do is have you spend one day in Hell and one day in Heaven. Then you can choose were to spend eternity."

"Really, I've made up my mind. I want to be in Heaven," says the pol.

"I'm sorry but we have our rules." And with that, St. Peter escorts him to the elevator and he goes down, down, down …. to Hell.

The doors open and he finds himself in the middle of a green golf course. In the distance is a gleaming clubhouse and standing in front of it are all his friends and other politicians who had worked with him; everyone is very happy and dressed in fancy evening dress. They run to greet him, hug him, slap him on the back and reminisce about the good times they had while getting rich at expense of the people. They play a friendly game of golf, do some gambling, have a few drinks (all free) and then dine on lobster and caviar. Also present is the Devil, who really is a very friendly guy who has a good time dancing and telling jokes.

They are having such a good time that, before he realizes it, it is time to go. Everyone waves while the elevator rises. The elevator goes up, up, up and the door reopens on Heaven, where St. Peter is waiting.

"Now it's time to visit Heaven." So 24 hours pass with the politician joining a group of contented souls moving from cloud to cloud, playing the harp and singing. It is very peaceful and serene. They have a good time and, before he realizes it, the 24 hours have gone by and St. Peter returns.

"Well then, you've spent a day in Hell and another in Heaven. Now choose your eternity."

He reflects for a minute and then answers "Well, I would never have guessed that I would say this …. I mean Heaven has been delightful …. but I think I would prefer to be in Hell."

So Saint Peter escorts him to the elevator and he goes down, down, down to Hell. The doors of the elevator open. He is in the middle of a barren, hot, glaring landscape covered with human waste and burning garbage. He sees all his friends - naked, sweating, forlorn - picking up the burning trash with their bare hands and putting into immense, heavy bags that they drag, on bleeding, cut bare feet, along the uneven and sharp gravel-strewn ground. Periodically, demons swoop in with whips and hot pokers to prod on the exhausted and suffering souls.

The Devil comes over and lays his arm on his neck. “You’re back,” he sneers into his face with the foulest of breath.

"I don't understand," stammers the pol. "Yesterday I was here and there was a golf course and clubhouse and we ate lobster and caviar and drank wine and margaritas and danced and had a great time. Now all there is a wasteland full of burning garbage, and my friends look miserable.”

The Devil smiles and says, "Yesterday we were campaigning. Today you voted for us!"


TOPICS: Constitution/Conservatism; Culture/Society; Free Republic; Government; Miscellaneous; Political Humor/Cartoons; Politics/Elections
KEYWORDS: joke; politician; taxreform
My good Tax Reform Advocate/FReeper FRiend Dick Bachert sent this to me this morning. Thought I'd share it with my other FReeper FRiends.

Enjoy.

1 posted on 07/01/2003 7:52:20 AM PDT by Taxman
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To: *Taxreform; All
Be sure to share this with your FRiends. IMHO, this neatly encapsulates far too many of our "Public Servants."
2 posted on 07/01/2003 7:53:35 AM PDT by Taxman
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To: Taxman
An old rewritten Microsoft joke.
3 posted on 07/01/2003 7:53:38 AM PDT by AppyPappy (If You're Not A Part Of The Solution, There's Good Money To Be Made In Prolonging The Problem.)
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To: AppyPappy
So?

I have never seen it before -- perhaps one or two other FReepers will enjoy it also.
4 posted on 07/01/2003 7:54:51 AM PDT by Taxman
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To: Taxman
ROFLMAO, Very good
5 posted on 07/01/2003 7:55:27 AM PDT by MJY1288 (The Gifted One is Clueless)
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To: Taxman
Not only is this an old joke, but it's neither "News" nor "Activism".
6 posted on 07/01/2003 7:56:12 AM PDT by Blzbba
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To: Blzbba; AppyPappy
Go get a life then sue me.

You guys who waste your time looking for reasons to criticize a poster's honest intention to share a meaningful (to them, anyway) joke, comment, article, etc. really do need to examine the guiding precepts of your life.

Jeez, man, if you don't like the post, don't waste your time reading it or waste other's time commenting on it -- move on to something more meaningful!

There are new people lurking and signing on to FRee Republic all the time, and it is possible, just possible, mind you, that they have not seen the joke I posted.

I have been a FReeper since November, 1998, and I haven't seen this joke, so it seemed like a good idea to post it.

IMHO, your and AppyPappy's inane comments render my judgement in the matter sound.
7 posted on 07/01/2003 10:38:34 AM PDT by Taxman
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To: MJY1288
Thank you.

The sad part is that there is a huge element of truth lurking in this story. Sobering, isn't it?
8 posted on 07/01/2003 10:40:22 AM PDT by Taxman
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To: Taxman
wow - and here I've been arguing/discussing the sodomy ruling with Mr. Pappy on another thread, when he & I are in agreement about recycling tired internet jokes in a forum that's supposed to be "News/Activism"!

Apologies to both of ya - LOL!

Taxman's right, though. next time I'll just ignore the joke. Although I still maintain that it's neither "News" nor "Activism", and thus should be posted elsewhere here.
9 posted on 07/01/2003 10:43:30 AM PDT by Blzbba
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To: Taxman
You need a nap.
10 posted on 07/01/2003 11:00:50 AM PDT by AppyPappy (If You're Not A Part Of The Solution, There's Good Money To Be Made In Prolonging The Problem.)
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To: Blzbba
Apology accepted.

If the Admin Moderator wants to move the post, I have no problem with that. I was hoping that the joke would catch a larger audience. Next time I may just check all the boxes! LOL!
11 posted on 07/01/2003 11:22:29 AM PDT by Taxman
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To: AppyPappy
LOL! Not since I started using my CPAP machine!
12 posted on 07/01/2003 11:23:03 AM PDT by Taxman
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To: Taxman
Hi Taxman,Thank you for the Joke, it not only gave me a good laugh, but it reminded me not to belive any politican, no matter which party he represents. Thanks again..
13 posted on 07/01/2003 4:26:55 PM PDT by BooBoo1000
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To: Taxman
I haven't seen this joke, so it seemed like a good idea to post it.

I hadn't seen it either. Thank you for posting it!!

14 posted on 07/01/2003 4:29:17 PM PDT by noexcuses
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To: noexcuses
You are most welcome -- it is an entirely appropriate observation of the nature of the beast we face.
15 posted on 07/01/2003 4:32:44 PM PDT by Taxman
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To: BooBoo1000
You are welcome. See post #15.
16 posted on 07/01/2003 4:33:11 PM PDT by Taxman
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To: Taxman
Hi there Taxman. I never saw this joke and thank you for it.

Hmm, truth often said in jest. Scrap the Code and scrap the IRS!!!!!

17 posted on 07/01/2003 5:00:28 PM PDT by catfur (In my world, no outfit is complete without cat fur)
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To: Taxman
Thanks for the laugh!
18 posted on 07/01/2003 5:20:12 PM PDT by Patriotic Bostonian
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To: Patriotic Bostonian; catfur
You are welcome!
19 posted on 07/01/2003 8:12:22 PM PDT by Taxman
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