No, this is wrong in an important and fundamental way. The "marriage right" is indeed a right and not a "privilege." The marriage right is "continuous, permanent and uninterrupted." To counsel Catholic couples in a way that tells them something different is to mislead them about a crucial element of the marriage contract. ~~ Maximilian
I'd have to email Joel Miller of RAZORMOUTH.COM for the specifics, but...
Amongst my own spiritual forebears, the American Puritans, there is at least one documented Canon Law case of a Puritan Husband being placed under Church Discipline (to the point of threatened denial of participation in the Supper!) on account of obdurate refusal to grant his Puritan Wife reasonable and regular enjoyment of her Marital Rights.
Miller wrote a joyous and delightfully-raucous Editorial on the subject back in the early days of RazorMouth entitled "The Joy of Puritan Sex", which sadly can no longer be found on GOOGLE (last I checked). Suffice it to say that the Puritans have an ill-deserved reputation as killjoys: the first permanent structure they built on the North American continent was a brewery, and their attitude towards Sex within the Bond of Marriage was apparently founded on the maxim, "Wild jack-rabbits are a perfectly good Model provided in Nature. Go thou and do likewise."
I'm sure everyone gets a "headache" now and then, but it does seem to me that the "Marital Privilege" is indeed a Right -- especially, a Right which you freely delegate to the needs of your spouse. If she has need of your attentions, and you've got a "headache" yet again tonight...
Well, buck up and quit whining. Onward, Christian Soldier.... we'd hate to have to place you under Puritan Church Discipline.
I admit I'm having a little fun with the subject, but I think that gives my sense of things in the "Right vs. Privilege" argument.
Best, OP
LOL. How appropriate that we should take a lesson from our Puritan forebears as we celebrate Independence Day.