Posted on 04/30/2011 2:38:35 PM PDT by marshmallow
The Archbishop of York has given his backing to Prince William and Kate Middleton’s decision to live together before marriage.
The Archbishop of York backed Prince William and Kate Middleton’s decision to live together before marriage, saying that many modern couples want to “test the milk before they buy the cow”.
Dr John Sentamu argued that the royal couple’s public commitment to live their lives together today would be more important than their past.
But Anglican traditionalists criticised the Archbishop, the second most senior cleric in the Church of England, for failing to reinforce Christian teaching which prohibits sex outside marriage.
The row came as Prince William and Kate Middleton unveiled their choices for the royal wedding service, which include classically British music and hymns, and an updated choice of marriage vows in which the bride omits the word “obey”.
In a television interview, Dr Sentamu was asked whether it was appropriate for the Prince, who is in line to become head of the Church of England as King, to have been living with his bride before marriage.
He said he had conducted wedding services for “many cohabiting couples” during his time as a vicar in south London.
“We are living at a time where some people, as my daughter used to say, they want to test whether the milk is good before they buy the cow,” he said. “For some people that’s where their journeys are.
(Excerpt) Read more at telegraph.co.uk ...
Just wow.
My guess is that the vast majority of couples live together prior to marriage.
I lived with my wife before I married her, and even I know I was wrong for doing it...but on the other hand, if I hadn’t, she wouldn’t have become a Christian.
Hard to figure out which way the see-saw drops on that one.
I would expect this, maybe, from a college age jerkoff, but a Christian archbishop? Stick a fork in the UK, it's done.
Kate’s a milk cow now?
Yea and divorce rates coincide with people shacking up...This is the biggest myth that liberal have come up with.. Statistics show people who live together before marriage have greater chance of getting a divorce than people who don’t.
(face palm)
Awful metaphor, but so very accurate of how people are today...
can you show me where you got these stats please
And in Texas, the adage is, “Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?”
More common, IMHO, and couples who live together before marriage are more likely to divorce. But hey, best to ‘em...
Colonel, USAFR
“Test the milk before they buy the cow.”
Terrible metaphor. Kate is a milk cow that needs to be tested (have sex with) before marriage?
“And not rather, (as we be slanderously reported, and as some affirm that we say,) Let us do evil, that good may come? whose damnation is just.”
Romans 3:8
Joseph’s brothers threw him into the pit, and sold him to slavers. If they had not done that, Egypt would not have been saved from famine. So does that make what they did right? Hardly.
God could have saved your wife without your sin; he could have saved Egypt without Joseph’s brothers’ sin, as well. Just because God in His incredible mercy overcomes evil with good doesn’t mean evil is ok.
I am not assaulting you personally, because I (not a Christian at the time) lived together before marriage as well. I am just making what I think is a very important theological point.
I’d rather my kids live with their future spouse too instead of them now moving in once married and finding out that they have made a huge mistake like he’s a slob, she’s a layabout etc
Well the one thing I can attest to personally is the fact that women nowadays seem to develop what I can only describe as an extreme cavalier attitude shortly after marriage. And then shortly after that, begin to take more than they give regarding all aspects of a marriage.
I’ve always believed each party should give 60% and only take 40% this way you never meet in the middle.
But I’m now twice divorced and have been living with a nice woman for many years that I met after my last divorce. And were both very happy and each day it seems is a new and exciting adventure.
Well, the sluts do.
Kinda good for the guy. No commitment, have fun — even if it leads to a baby, get out with nothing lost.
Women who live together with men outside of marriage are insane. And have no self-respect.
As far as the baby goes — all clinical research to date says children of committed (read: married) couples have happier and more fulfilled lives.
But who cares about that? It is the “I WANT IT NOW!” with no obligations generations we are dealing with.
“Kate’s a milk cow now?”
In the non-Christian view, marriage becomes but a contract wherein sex is traded for financial protection. Like whoredom.
can you show me where you got that info from please.
I find it hard to know that today any people do not live together before marriage and do you have the stats on how many wait and then marry?
“I’d rather my kids live with their future spouse too instead of them now moving in once married and finding out that they have made a huge mistake like he’s a slob, she’s a layabout etc...”
People are married many years and can take up or improve upon bad habits at any time.
My wife and I shacked up for a couple years before marrying. I did it because I am a cheap skate and keeping one apartment saved us tons of money. I doubt these two had the same situation.
"Journey" is one of those words that catches my ear when it is used by religious leaders. There is some truth to the fact that all Christians are (or are supposed to be) on a journey towards greater holiness, but I get the feeling that the term is in lieu of discerning right from wrong.
As for the cow metaphor, what the Archbishop is saying is that men should take women on "test drives" to see if they like having sex with them enough to get married to them -- a kind of test period during which women can be expected to perform to men's expectations in order to be rewarded with the love and security women crave.
It's rather disgusting when you think about the reality of the situation.
Very sound advice...
My wife and I lived together for a couple of years before marriage. Three kids and 25 years later, we're still together.
William and Kate have some strong incentives to stay together and produce some heirs. Then again, so did Charles and Di.
There are ways of discerning the character of an individual that don't involve the exchange of body fluids.
What kind of parent wants a man to "try out" his daughter's vagina before committing to love and cherish her?
American Sociological Review, 1988, Vol 53: 127-138) entitled, “Commitment and the Modern Union: Assessing the Link Between Premarital Cohabitation and Subsequent Marital Stability.
Author in this study found that the risk of divorce after living together is 80% higher than the risk of divorce after not living together.
If you google cohabitation and divorce rates you will come up with a lot of data that backs this up.
Please link to that study, because everything I've ever read on this topic points to the exact opposite.
As couples say they decided to not marry someone after living with them for a period of time, they discovered faults and traits about their mate that would have resulted in a divorce. Such as infidelity, lying, hiding serious secrets or in many cases substance abuse habits and abusive traits.
Things one can only find out after living together or marriage.
You wrote:
“I find it hard to know that today any people do not live together before marriage”
Maybe you should meet some better people.
Some stats for you: http://www.lifesitenews.com/news/archive/ldn/2009/jul/09071502
Here are some statistics on living together before marriage from Michael McManus, author of the book Marriage Savers. Statistically speaking, living together is not a trial of marriage, but rather a training for divorce.
The number of unmarried couples living together soared 12-fold from 430,000 in 1960 to 5.4 million in 2005.
More than eight out of ten couples who live together will break up either before the wedding or afterwards in divorce.
About 45 percent of those who begin cohabiting, do not marry. Another 5-10 percent continue living together and do not marry.
Couples who do marry after living together are 50% more likely to divorce than those who did not.
Only 12 percent of couples who have begun their relationship with cohabitation end up with a marriage lasting 10 years or more.
A Penn State study reports that even a month’s cohabitation decreases the quality of the couple’s relationship.
It just occurred to me, gee, if an 18 year old boy was to move in and bed his young girlfriend, prior to marriage...do you really think he is thinking...’I just want to see if we’re c-o-m-p-a-t-i-b-l-e’?
heheh, I thinketh not.
Here are some more statistics relating to the children of cohabiting parents.
Children of cohabiting parents are ten times more likely to be sexually abused by a stepparent than by a parent.
Children of cohabiting parents are three times as likely to be expelled from school or to get pregnant as teenagers than children from an intact home with married parents.
Children of cohabiting parents are five times more apt to live in poverty, and 22 times more likely to incarcerated.
some can but leaving the seat up leaving the toothpaste top off, leaving socks on the ground , finding out she can’t cook, he doesn;t do anything but eat in bed
You need to cite your source and link it, simply spouting off numbers isn’t gonna fly here.
WTF, HUH, are you serious?
got a link please?
Why even open a Bible these days?
Your right, but then again an 18 year old has about as much business marrying as I do commanding the space shuttle.
you got a link from a source which is not a religious one please
you got a link from a source which is not a religious one please
I would like a link which does not come from a source which promotes their view please, that way it can be more useful to argue the point
“It is better to keep your mouth shut and appear stupid than to open it and remove all doubt”?
Hence the cow metaphor.
It's the same reason guys are pro-abortion. They get uncommitted sex and get to bury the evidence.
Wonder what the Archbishop has to say about Charlie? That was all ok too I suppose? If lots of people think it’s ok then it must be ok, right?
Serious about my views on parents who want guys "test driving" their daughters? Why wouldn't I be serious?
cracks me up with those who say stats show but then give numbers from a place which backs their view up.
I’;d rather my kids know that they can live with someone than just wait and then find out he eats food in bed, leaves socks up, is a slob, is a bad tempered man, smashes things up
Like the saying goes, you do not know the person until you have lived with them
I lived with now my wife for two years and then we married and now we have 3 kids and going on 16 years and if a small minority doesn’t like it then tough, we’re happy and happy we did it like that
You wrote:
“you got a link from a source which is not a religious one please”
I used google. Maybe you should use google rather than seem helpless.
Several years ago I was dating a woman with a young daughter. We decided not to have sex before marriage for her sake. We did decide after three years that we were not compatible, so we ended our relationship. Years later the daughter contacted me and thanked me for being a good role model. She decided to wait until after marriage to have sex and is now married to a wonderful man who respects her. I know...this is only ONE example.
That's not the reason. It's the gal who is checking out the guy's stuff.
The minister who counseled us before our wedding said each should give 100%. Then you don’t have to worry about how much either is taking.
Easier said than done, but something to try to achieve.
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