I have been struggling with this recently, and I’ve realized that there’s a further step required. You can forgive someone, no longer be angry, not be intending to get even, all that ... but you might have drawn a conclusion from what occurred that will continue to poison the relationship. “I forgive him ... but I’ve learned that I can’t rely on him. I have to do everything for myself.”
This is difficult to overcome, because it seems perfectly reasonable, and yet, “Whatever does not proceed from faith is sin.” If I believe that the Spirit can work in me to conform me more closely to Christ, I have to believe that He is also working and changing others.
I forgive him ... but Ive learned that I cant rely on him. I have to do everything for myself.
Forgiveness doesn’t mean you have to leave out common sense.
If someone gives you a ride home, but gets into an accident because they are a bad driver - you can easily forgive them, but that doesn’t mean that you have to force yourself to get in their car again.
This was one of the homilies at my ELCA church that they got right, which is that forgiving and forgetting are two different animals.
As to your last observation - that the Spirit can change people. That’s certainly true, however, then the entire subject turns on timetables and cost/benefit analysis. God doesn’t call for us to be pinatas, just forgiving.