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My friend is seriously considering suicide. Is it ALWAYS wrong?
may 31, 2003 | tame

Posted on 05/31/2003 10:42:16 AM PDT by tame

I have a friend who is very seriously considering suicide. This friend is not interested in pity, but rather truly believes that a greater good could be served by his "withdrawel" from this life. He is almost "clinical" in his consideration of the decision.

While he believes suicide is morally wrong in many circumstances, he believes that it is the optimal moral choice in rare circumstances such as his. He is a Christian and he believes he has brought too much shame to his church, God, and his family to the point that less shame would be brought on God's kingdom if he simply "checked out".

His principle for this greater good of suicide is drawn from 1 Corinthians chapter 5 where Paul indicated it was better for a certain man to be handed over to Satan that his flesh may be destroyed but his soul saved in the day of judgement.

Now, I realize the immediate outcry most of you will voice against suicide, but on further contemplation is suicide always wrong without exception? What say you?


TOPICS: Ecumenism; General Discusssion; Ministry/Outreach; Moral Issues; Religion & Culture; Theology
KEYWORDS: christianliberty; suicide
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To: Gamecock
Not jumping to any conclusions, just trying to be comprehensive......

I understand.

21 posted on 05/31/2003 8:27:39 PM PDT by tame (If I must be the victim of a criminal, please let it be Catwoman! Rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!)
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To: drstevej
Am praying for you both.

Thanks, Dr, it's very much apreciated and needed.

22 posted on 05/31/2003 8:29:01 PM PDT by tame (If I must be the victim of a criminal, please let it be Catwoman! Rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!)
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To: tame
BTW, I like your homepage....
23 posted on 05/31/2003 8:30:48 PM PDT by Gamecock (Presbyterian Church in America: Intolerant since 1983!)
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To: Conservative til I die
"I'd be better off dead"

But the problem is he really believes that not only would he be better off, but so would his loved ones and God'd Kingdom.

24 posted on 05/31/2003 8:30:58 PM PDT by tame (If I must be the victim of a criminal, please let it be Catwoman! Rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!)
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To: Gamecock
BTW, I like your homepage....

Thank you :0)

25 posted on 05/31/2003 8:31:47 PM PDT by tame (If I must be the victim of a criminal, please let it be Catwoman! Rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!)
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To: MHGinTN
If it were my friend, I would plead with them on the grounds of our friendship and the diminshment I will suffer as I remain alive missing my friend, whereas the friend has gone away purposely, ending our friendship with their selfish act.

He argues that even if apparently selfish, it would truly benefit all involved in the long run. I'm deperately hoping he somehow get's a hold of the situation and bring good out of it. But he's almost unable to take care of basic responsiblities in life. Even making and keeping an appointment with a counselor seems insurmountable.

26 posted on 05/31/2003 8:45:09 PM PDT by tame (If I must be the victim of a criminal, please let it be Catwoman! Rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!)
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To: John_burchett
I've gone on too long, hope I was helpful. in Him,-john

No problem! Much appreciated :o)

27 posted on 05/31/2003 8:48:14 PM PDT by tame (If I must be the victim of a criminal, please let it be Catwoman! Rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!)
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To: Japedo
In my opinion I believe that suicide is the easy way out. There is no justification due to shame. G-d gave one the Gift of life, it is up to him when our time is up.

This being said, I do not believe that G-d will give us more then we can handle.

Much appreciated!

28 posted on 05/31/2003 8:50:48 PM PDT by tame (If I must be the victim of a criminal, please let it be Catwoman! Rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!)
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To: JesseShurun; restornu; Gamecock
Thank you all for your input. Yes, JesseShurum, the guy is saved.

From the time we are born which bring joy to those around and like in the Movie "Its A Wonderful Life!" in our own life we could never know all of the positive effects we had on those who passed our way!

That's a great movie, restornu, and it sure does bring perspective!

29 posted on 05/31/2003 8:54:12 PM PDT by tame (If I must be the victim of a criminal, please let it be Catwoman! Rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!)
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To: tame; drstevej
This friend is not interested in pity, but rather truly believes that a greater good could be served by his "withdrawel" from this life. He is almost "clinical" in his consideration of the decision.

The greatest good, that of exalting Jesus Christ and making disciples of all nations, is best served by the witness and testimony of transformed lives.

For your friend to take his own life serves no purpose. True believers will know your friend denied Christ's forgiveness and His healing, transformative power. Non-believers will scoff and conclude your friend was another misguided person who placed his happiness on the empty promises of religion.

On the other hand, your friend should consider what a powerfull testimony he could give on Christ's forgiveness and healing in his own life. Further, God may have allowed these trials into your friend's life so that your friend, somewhere down the road, can be an encouraging counselor to other troubled souls to whom only he can relate and demonstrate to them that Jesus can help them as well.

As DrSteveJ said, your friend needs immediate competent spiritual and medical help. He can be an example of an overcomer in Christ, or a succumber in the world. Which serves God better?

30 posted on 05/31/2003 9:05:50 PM PDT by Starwind
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To: tame
We do not belong to ourselves; we belong to God. To kill one's self is the exact same thing as killing another human being.

Would you condone killing someone else because they brought shame to themselves, their loved ones or to God? I doubt it.

Suicide is the ultimate manipulative, passive-aggressive ego-trip. Anyone contemplating it should have no illusions they are doing it for some "greater good." Suicide scars everyone left behind. It is a selfish act of unbearable cruelty.

Your friend should find a minister or a competent therapist who can help him get through this moment of terror. It is only temporary. Anyone who doubts that has not lived long enough to know that nothing lasts forever but God.

31 posted on 05/31/2003 9:07:38 PM PDT by Dr. Eckleburg (There are very few shades of gray.)
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To: tame
God gave life. It's His decision when it is to be taken. Anybody who takes their own life, fundamentally is committing a final act before the first death in rebllion to God's will.

Note that the situation might appear to be one of human good, but without Christ and performing in God's will through Christ, human good falls short of Divine Good.

When placed before judgment, the 'good works' will be judged but found to be good for nothing if not cleansed by righteousness only available via Christ.

Tell your friend to read Job. There are many situations where our struggle might simply be a testimony before the heavenlies for the Angelic Conflict to witness as evidencery testing of the consequences of His will being obeyed.

Note that Satan, is appealing the judgment already rendered upon him and the fallen angels. He seeks to present ANY counterfeit system or alternate system to God's will as a plausible way to successfully rule the universe. The history of man has been cast before the heavenlies as a mystery to the angels, as if you will, a testimony regarding the justness and appropriateness of God's will in His judgment. Satan and the fallen angels seek to demonstrate any plausible method which counters God's will as a plausible method to rule the universe as an alternate to God's will, in order to give cause in an appeal to overturn their condemnation.

Within this appeals court, man, like the angels has volition, but unlike the angels wasn't afforded eternal life until we accept God on His terms. Man's judgment comes later, while that of fallen angels has already occurred.

The meat of this issue, is that ANY thought or action independent of God's will, falls as an argument in support of Satan's proposal that his cosmic system is a viable alternate to God's will.

Have faith in Him, Jesus Christ and persevere through all things. No matter what the trial, there is no temptation to great than that which may be resisted.

For every curse there is a blessing for those who persevere in Him. Perhaps not now, but maybe even a greater reward in heaven.

Read Job and consider that man isn't always in the position to know these things and when that happens, all the more reason to have faith in Him that the trial is one of importance to those in the heavenlies.

Our struggle is not with flesh and blood, but with the authorities, powers, and principalities.

Remain in Him and there will be no wrong path. Suicide is not an appropriate option.
32 posted on 05/31/2003 9:07:57 PM PDT by Cvengr (<;^))
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To: tame
tame,I would tell your friend that their is so much work for God to be done.So many around us are in sin but we see only ours.Be with people who hold you up or move on and most important always get advice from a spiritual director before you do anything-I have phone #'so just ask-all confidential.
I care about your friend and will pray.
33 posted on 05/31/2003 10:05:58 PM PDT by fatima (Go Karen,Look at all these's prayers.For all our troops,we love you.)
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To: tame
just a couple of questions:

1)What can you do about this situation?
2)What do you think you should do about this situation?

It appears that the whole spectrum of theology has been presented before you this early morning, it has not been run before your friend. IMO, it seems as if you have to act upon what you have heard as best as you believe God would enable you to.

Sorry, if you're looking for a "magic answer" i don't have it for you, and i am just as inadequate in that as you or anyone else. Remember the old Calvinist mantra, "Love God and do what you will". Think about it.

34 posted on 05/31/2003 10:48:15 PM PDT by Calvinist_Dark_Lord (" I have come here to kick @$$ and chew bubblegum...and I'm all outta bubblegum!" -Roddy Piper)
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To: tame
Here are the references from The Catechism of the Catholic Church on suicide.

I am not a counselor or anything like that. But if you are indeed close to this person, try to get them to talk about their problems and then ask them what alternative solutions they might come up with.

35 posted on 05/31/2003 11:01:58 PM PDT by Salvation (†With God all things are possible.†)
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To: tame
**this person has brought disrepute to God, his family, friends, etc. So in that sense he may think his trials are worse?**

But these can be forgiven. Has he talked to a priest?

36 posted on 05/31/2003 11:05:30 PM PDT by Salvation (†With God all things are possible.†)
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To: tame
Can he cope with the next 5 minutes? The next five second?

When my husband died, that was all I could do sometimes.

The Serenity Prayer

God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change;
The courage to change the things I can;
And the wisdom to know the difference.
Amen.
37 posted on 05/31/2003 11:10:44 PM PDT by Salvation (†With God all things are possible.†)
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To: Dr. Eckleburg
Your friend should know he has only two choices -- obey God and live, or deny God and die, eternally lost.

Amen!

All men do indeed have two choices!

38 posted on 06/01/2003 12:02:09 AM PDT by fortheDeclaration
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To: fortheDeclaration; tame; Calvinist_Dark_Lord
Hi FTD.

I like Calvinist_Dark_Lord's "Calvinist mantra" in post #34...

"Love God and do what you will."

39 posted on 06/01/2003 12:46:46 AM PDT by Dr. Eckleburg (There are very few shades of gray.)
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To: tame
You say the guy is saved... but does a saved person succumb to despair? And why does he not believe that God will forgive your friend for anything if he is truly repentant?

Aside of this guy having a crisis of faith, it sounds like he needs some sort of Christian psychiatrist.

I mean no offense, but it seems to me that your friend would bring more shame on God, his family and his church (this I don't understand... does he put his faith in his church?) if he as he says, "checked out" -- this is a lack of faith.

40 posted on 06/01/2003 12:49:25 AM PDT by american colleen
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