Posted on 12/08/2004 8:50:15 AM PST by presidio9
EVER been driven up the chimney by a Christmas song that you really, really hate? New Jersey researchers have named the six worst Christmas songs of all time, as picked by holiday-music fans who were asked to rate more than 600 yule tunes.
The biggest lump of coal goes to "O Holy Night" as sung by the foul-mouthed Cartman from "South Park," according to Edison Media Research.
Close behind are Seymour Swine & the Squealers' butchered "Blue Christmas," "Jingle Bells" by The Singing Dogs and, separately, Barbra Streisand — and "12 Days of Guido Christmas" by the Ha Ya Doin' Boys.
"We play — very lightly — the Barbra Streisand version of 'Jingle Bells' because she's got a following in New York," says Jim Ryan, programmer of top-rated Lite FM (WLTW/106.7).
"People tend not to like it because it's a really fast, up-tempo version of 'Jingle Bells' — almost like she did it as a goof," Ryan told The Post.
WPLJ (95.5 FM) music director Tony Mascaro says his research turned up a sixth song that listeners can't stand: Elmo & Patsy's "Grandma Got Run Over By a Reindeer."
(Excerpt) Read more at nypost.com ...
That song sucks so seriously that I blocked it out of my mind and forgot to put it on my "Top Ten Worst" list. It belongs in the #2 slot, ahead of "Santa Claus is Coming." Make that the 1.5 slot.
Mom got drunk and Dad got drunk
at our Christmas party.
We were drinkin' champagne punch and homemade eggnog.
Little sister brought her new boyfriend.
He was a Mexican.
We didn't know what to think of him
until he sang Feliz Navidad.
Brother Ken brought his kids with him-
the three from his first wife Lynn,
and the two identical twins
from his second wife Mary Nell.
Of course he brought his new wife, Kay-
who talks all about AA,
chain smokin' while the stereo plays
Noel, Noel, the First Noel.
Carve the turkey, turn the ballgame on.
Mix margaritas when the eggnog's gone.
Send somebody to the Quik Pak store,
we need some icing and extension cords,
a can of bean dip and some Diet Rite,
a box of tampons and some more Burl Ives.
Halleluia everybody say cheese,
Merry Christmas from the Family.
Fran and Rita drove from Harlogen.
I can't remember how I'm kin to them.
But when they tried to plug their motor home in,
they blew our Christmas lights.
Cousin David knew just what went wrong
so we all waited out on our front lawn.
He threw the breaker and the lights came on
and we sang Silent Night, oh Silent Night.
Carve the turkey, turn the ballgame on
Make bloody marys cause we all want one.
Send somebody to the Stop 'N Go,
we need some celery and a can of fake snow,
a bag of lemons and some Diet Sprite,
a box of tampons and some Salem Lights.
Halleluia everybody say cheese,
Merry Christmas from the Family.
Feliz Navidad...
Can't recall it - but sure sounds like my kind of offbeat song!
Hey I love the Barking dogs' version of "Jingle Bells." It ain't Christmas for me without that one!
TiVO'd it last night. I has been a must-see-at-all-costs since I was about 8 years old.
I agree about Linus' speech. It blows me away every time.
Of course, the version on the live album is really fun with all the audience participation.
Another one that hasn't been mentioned is Ray Stevens' hilarious "Santa Clause is Watchin' You" (he's everywhere, he's everywhere)
She is a product of New York public schools. The only "yeshiva" she ever attended was the one she built on the set of "Yentl"
That's probably true. The emperor is stark raving naked and no one will say. I think that happens with some great acts sometimes.
That's funny.
That is too funny!
Is that one on the "Chipmunks Roasting On an Open Fire" CD?
My sister dressed as Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer for a Halloween party. She went to Sally's Boutique (Salvation Army store)and bought old lady clothes and powdered her hair grey and wore a hair net. She accessorized with an old Army issue purse of mine (old lady looking solid black)and a cane. But the best part were the black felt reindeer hoofs up the back of her outfit.
In these parts it made for an award winning outfit.
"Burl Ives' "Holly Jolly Christmas," "
I have to disagree with you. I have too many good memories of Burl Ives' doing America Sings at Disneyland when I was growing up to think poorly of any of his songs.
I agree with you, McCartney's "Freedom" isn't a good song, but I was at his concert right after 9/11/01 and it brought the house down. He had flags and all kinds of patriotic effects.
The song works in an emotional setting but not on the radio.
His Christmas song is a nightmare.
- - or Alvin & the Chipmunks.
Are you joking or does the Army actually issue women purses? LOL! Those have to be really something!
I'm not a big fan of Holly Jolly Christmas either, by my husband just loves it. I mean really LOVES it. I don't know why.
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