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America's model housewife turns feminist as husband abandons her
Guardian Unlimited ^ | January 8, 2006 | Paul Harris

Posted on 01/08/2006 2:24:03 PM PST by Lorianne

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To: Nea Wood
. . .women just can't win no matter what they do. No matter what happens, it's always the woman's fault.

That's right. If she stays at home to care for the kids, scrub the toilets, get a hot dinner on the table by 6 every night, and move all over the US in support of her husband's career, she's a leech. If she has a career she's a feminist lib and is, as you say, neglecting the children and her husband.

. . .the most vicious woman-hater on FR (and unfortunately, there are a lot of them,). . .Have some compassion, for crying out loud.

Sorry, Nea, your assessment is accurate: a lot of them are vicious woman-haters, and as such they are devoid of compassion for females.

For those who expect a 67-year-old woman to maintain current job skills, I'd like to ask how she is supposed to fit that little activity into a day that involves taking care of a house, a husband, and FIVE children. That's more than a full-time job and it often goes on until late at night, seven days a week. So she finally gets the last child raised, maybe ten years ago, and she's supposed to go back to work at the age of 55 or so on grounds that her husband might at some point have an affair and dump her? Most women who were not paranoid would not guess that a husband to whom they had been devoted for many years would simply ambush them with divorce papers and that they'd need to prepare for that possibility.

61 posted on 01/08/2006 3:17:24 PM PST by Capriole (I don't have any problems that can't be solved by more chocolate or more ammunition.)
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To: HairOfTheDog; ladyjane

Hey, hey, I was just joking. And I do understand the concept of being kicked to the curb.


62 posted on 01/08/2006 3:17:40 PM PST by umgud (uncompassionate conservative)
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To: mad_as_he$$
Is it also possible that she is frigid, too talkative, very demanding, slightly senile and a henpecker?

If she is---it's because her husband was lacking in many things.

63 posted on 01/08/2006 3:18:59 PM PST by Fawn
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To: dalereed

If she is 67 she is eligible for SS, and if her ex-husband has a SS account she can draw from that. It would not diminish his SS in any way either. I don't blame her for not wanting to start over at 67.


64 posted on 01/08/2006 3:20:08 PM PST by pepperdog
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To: HairOfTheDog

The average "professional" writer makes about $5000 a year, according to the Authors' Guild. Being a writer is not a very good way to support yourself unless you have some specialized area of knowledge to combine it with. Even then, with thousands of writers and editors being thrown out of work by the layoffs at major media outlets, the competition for the same three jobs is horrendous. This lady is not going to be supporting herself for the next 25 years of her life by writing.


65 posted on 01/08/2006 3:22:35 PM PST by Capriole (I don't have any problems that can't be solved by more chocolate or more ammunition.)
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To: Fawn; All
"Someone already pointed out that women file 2/3 of the time and that the non-faulty party are the ones to file."

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!

Methinks you got that exactly backwards, sister. The 'faulty' ones (whatever that means) are the ones who usually file.

OK, can we all just agree that all of the divorced women on this thread hate and blame men, and all of the divorced men on this thread hate and blame women, and stop the sniping at each other?

I have no answers to the age-old questions about the 'war of the sexes'; only observations; like many of you chicks who have posted, many of my observations are also personally painful ones...

66 posted on 01/08/2006 3:25:31 PM PST by Al Simmons ('A vote is like a rifle: its usefulness depends upon the character of the user' - Theodore Roosevelt)
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To: Al Simmons
"... are dumped by their wives, who correctly gauge that the current system is set up to screw men out of their children and out of their money."

There have been several studies of this question - including some done by conservative "rpo-family" researchers and groups - which demonstrate that on the average divorce is considerably more economically damaging to women then men.

67 posted on 01/08/2006 3:25:38 PM PST by M. Dodge Thomas (More of the same, only with more zeros at the end.)
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To: HighlyOpinionated
"He wants respect, she wants love. All explained quite well in the book."

Gee, thanks for the revelation, Sherlock - Noe tell me, does the book also explain how to get around the fact that many people understand the above statement, but go through life with the "until I get mine FIRST, I ain't giving him/her theirs"?

68 posted on 01/08/2006 3:27:52 PM PST by Al Simmons ('A vote is like a rifle: its usefulness depends upon the character of the user' - Theodore Roosevelt)
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To: Capriole
It was just an observation of the conflict about her getting a book deal to describe how she was left with no skills...

You're right, there isn't good money in it for many... I thought perhaps because she was apparently a writer of some renown and prior success, she might be well situated to earn a good living from that (better than many).

69 posted on 01/08/2006 3:28:18 PM PST by HairOfTheDog (Join the Hobbit Hole Troop Support - http://freeper.the-hobbit-hole.net/ 1,000 knives and counting!)
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To: M. Dodge Thomas

Maybe. But to everyone their own painful experience is the measuring rod.


70 posted on 01/08/2006 3:28:50 PM PST by Al Simmons ('A vote is like a rifle: its usefulness depends upon the character of the user' - Theodore Roosevelt)
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To: Sirloin

I personally know of this happening to two abandoned wives.
1st case--he left good-looking blonde for a H'wood beautiful wife.Claimed wife #1 too perfectionist-kept a great house, planned meals to keep him slim, laid out coordinated suit, etc. for him daily, and worked outside the home, too. (I worked with her.)She was devastated after 15 yrs of marriage. He soon found wife#2 did not keep house, iron clothes, or cook. Wife #1 relaxed, found it was fun to start thinking of herself and, being attractive, soon started dating-ended up marrying again to a wealthy, handsome man who appreciated her. Ex came around complaining about his life and angry because she was dating. Sooo sad--for him.

Case #2--An acquaintance was left after 20 plus years of marriage for younger woman. She was devastated, but being a great person, found new interests and carried on her life. Within 18 mos. he was back--he missed what they had together and wanted to come back. We moved about that time, so don't know the outcome--but she still cared, so probably took him back.

For the men on here, this woman/wife of 40 years certainly does deserve a great many of the family assets for 40 years of wife and mothering. She should and probably will find a way to get on with her life (her new book), but the idea of being ORDERED to job tng. is ludicrous.

vaudine


71 posted on 01/08/2006 3:33:01 PM PST by vaudine
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To: flashbunny
What? And let Maureen Dowd have the field to herself?
72 posted on 01/08/2006 3:34:13 PM PST by Wally_Kalbacken
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To: Al Simmons

I've never been married or divorced....I'm speaking for my friends over the years.


73 posted on 01/08/2006 3:35:28 PM PST by Fawn
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To: HairOfTheDog

I hope you're right. The truth is, though, that to judge by her first book, she isn't a wonderful writer. This new book will appear briefly and then end up on the remainder shelves. She may make a bit of money but, as I say, she's not going to be supporting herself on the basis of it for the next quarter-century.

It would be nice if she got some alimony. A man I know in New York says that in general the divorce laws in New York are such that the woman always gets the kids, even if she has multiple child-abuse convictions, and the husband always gets the money, even if he is Scott Peterson. There's a presupposition in these liberal states that all women are corporate executives with their own high income. No tolerance for the stay-at-home mom at all.

And in case anybody's wondering, I don't favor women just exploiting their husbands with excessive alimony, either. But if a guy has enough money to attract a young slut of a second wife, he has enough to take care of the old one he threw away.


74 posted on 01/08/2006 3:38:24 PM PST by Capriole (I don't have any problems that can't be solved by more chocolate or more ammunition.)
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To: Fawn

You're TWICE blessed...(is my cynicism showing yet?)


75 posted on 01/08/2006 3:38:30 PM PST by Al Simmons ('A vote is like a rifle: its usefulness depends upon the character of the user' - Theodore Roosevelt)
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To: vaudine

A judge (still) can't order 'job training', but they're sure as heck gonna 'suggest' it - a rude awakening perhaps, but just the way the real world works....


76 posted on 01/08/2006 3:40:34 PM PST by Al Simmons ('A vote is like a rifle: its usefulness depends upon the character of the user' - Theodore Roosevelt)
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To: Lorianne
Despite that, the judge in her divorce case suggested that - at 67 - she go for job training.

Why does she need job training? Isn't she old enough to receive Socialist Security?

77 posted on 01/08/2006 3:40:48 PM PST by Texas Eagle (If it wasn't for double-standards, Liberals would have no standards at all.)
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To: Al Simmons

Yes, Watson, the book DOES tell how to get what you want and how to give what the other person wants.

But you'll have to read the book to find out how.

Be a sweetie and turn out the lights when you leave for the Big Box to pick up your very own copy.


78 posted on 01/08/2006 3:42:35 PM PST by HighlyOpinionated (In Memory of Crockett Nicolas, hit and run in the prime of his Cocker Spaniel life, 9/3/05.)
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To: Texas Eagle

She's entitled to the equivalent of half of her husband's Social Security. That doesn't end up being much, especially not in an expensive part of the US like New York.


79 posted on 01/08/2006 3:43:29 PM PST by Capriole (I don't have any problems that can't be solved by more chocolate or more ammunition.)
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To: Capriole
She's entitled to the equivalent of half of her husband's Social Security.

That's a stupid arrangement. And people are seriously opposing reforming Socialist Security?

80 posted on 01/08/2006 3:46:04 PM PST by Texas Eagle (If it wasn't for double-standards, Liberals would have no standards at all.)
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