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More parents showing up in children's job search
Chicago Sun-Times ^ | March 19, 2006 | Sue Shellenbarger

Posted on 03/19/2006 9:23:08 PM PST by Graybeard58

In interviews with a job candidate last year, Deborah D'Attilio, a recruiting manager in San Francisco for Enterprise Rent-A-Car, was surprised when the young woman brought a companion: her dad.

Saying ''he was interested in learning about the work environment,'' the father sat in the lobby during the interview, D'Attilio says. She didn't hold it against the candidate and wound up hiring the young woman.

Hovering parents are going to work. From Vanguard Group and St. Paul Travelers to General Electric and Boeing, managers are getting phone calls from parents asking them to hire their 20-something kids. Candidates are stalling on job offers to consult with their parents.

''It's unbelievable to me that a parent of a 22-year-old is calling on their behalf,'' says Allison Keeton, director of college relations for St. Paul Travelers. Like most employers, Keeton handles such encounters diplomatically. Some employers, however, are also adapting by altering some parts of the hiring process, sending parents copies of offer letters or including them in recruiting sessions.

General Electric made an offer to one recruit last fall, only to get a call the next day from the recruit's mother trying to negotiate an increase in pay, says Steve Canale, manager of recruiting and staffing services. GE didn't rescind the offer, but ''we didn't give in to Mom'' either, Mr. Canale says. Rich Hartnett, director of global staffing for Boeing, says one hiring manager was surprised when a recruit brought his mom right into the interview. Enterprise's D'Attilio says the mother of another recruit joined a phone call between her and a candidate and began grilling D'Attilio about benefits.

Some employers play along

Figuring they can't beat the trend, some employers are joining it. Ferguson Enterprises, a Newport News, Va., building-supplies distributor, last year started offering to send a copy of recruits' offer letters to their parents, says Denise Francum, director of recruiting; ''more than half of them say yes.''

Some young adults will resent parental hovering. An online poll of 400 students and young adults last year, by Experience Inc., a Boston career-services firm, found 25 percent said parents were ''overly involved to the point that their involvement was either annoying or embarrassing.''


TOPICS: Business/Economy
KEYWORDS: dependent; employment; helicopterdad; helicoptermom; helicopterparents; hover; jobs; nervouskids; wussification

1 posted on 03/19/2006 9:23:13 PM PST by Graybeard58
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To: Graybeard58

I can't imagine hiring anyone who needed one of their parents to attend the interview. That would be a terminal black mark.


2 posted on 03/19/2006 9:29:20 PM PST by inkling
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To: Graybeard58

Translation: "I am sick and tired of this brat living with me, so please, I'm begging you, give him a job."


3 posted on 03/19/2006 9:32:12 PM PST by LdSentinal
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To: Graybeard58

You mean this is REAL?

I thought it was Scrappleface when I read it.

"Mommy, tell this scary man to hire me".

I'm gonna barf. The first time I got fired, my mother WAS the axeman! And I deserved it!


4 posted on 03/19/2006 9:33:45 PM PST by Don W (Stoneage man survived thousands of years of bitter-cold ice. Modern man WILLsurvive global warming.)
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To: Don W
You must have been really bad for your own Mother to fire you.
5 posted on 03/19/2006 9:37:40 PM PST by Graybeard58 (Remember and pray for Sgt. Matt Maupin - MIA/POW- Iraq since 04/09/04)
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To: Graybeard58

Like I said, I deserved it. Learned from it, too.

Not to worry, though, I can still be an insufferable jerk. ;-)


6 posted on 03/19/2006 9:45:42 PM PST by Don W (Stoneage man survived thousands of years of bitter-cold ice. Modern man WILLsurvive global warming.)
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To: Graybeard58
When I graduated from university I discovered that my father had lined up a job for me with Eastern Airlines, boy was it battle royale when I told him I didn't want it.

He kicked my ass for that till the day they were liquidated - damn near 15 years.

I don't think there is anything new or remarkable about this,

7 posted on 03/19/2006 9:49:07 PM PST by Energy Alley
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To: Graybeard58
Part of me wishes that this was fake. That it hasn't gotten this bad.

Childhood extending into 20's. Were these people breastfed till age 10? I can't wait until I need to acquire permission slips from the parents of 35 year old employees to attend an out of town workshop. They are cultivating a generation of worthless, dependent, crybaby boobs.

This is f'ing pathetic. I can see it at age 13 or 14, fine. When I was 16 and applied for a job, my parents didn't interfere in any way. I told them, "I'm applying to work at Spetty Pond Landscapers," gave them the phone number and address, and I biked off. Oh, well, I guess my dad made me change my shirt...but still!

My uncle emigrated from Europe to Canada at age 16, alone. It was hard times in the homeland, and he wanted to set up an anchor and establish a foothold so my grandparents and my mother could follow later and not have to sleep on the floor.

8 posted on 03/19/2006 9:54:11 PM PST by M203M4
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To: LdSentinal

Yep. Doing anything to complete the launch sequence.


9 posted on 03/19/2006 9:55:50 PM PST by ItsForTheChildren
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To: LdSentinal

That was my take on it, too!!!!


10 posted on 03/19/2006 9:59:34 PM PST by cajun-jack
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To: Graybeard58

helicopter parent n. A parent who hovers over his or her children. Also: helicopter mother, helicopter mom, helicopter dad.

Mommy Dearest
"I've got some bad news - the millenials are coming, and the job of recruiters in placing this coddled generation might be too much for you to take."

http://www.recruiting.com/recruiting/2006/02/mommy_dearest.html

Do 'Helicopter Moms' Do More Harm Than Good?
http://abcnews.go.com/2020/Health/story?id=1237868&page=1


11 posted on 03/19/2006 10:12:33 PM PST by endthematrix (None dare call it ISLAMOFACISM!)
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To: M203M4

I interviewed a guy one time who brought his wife to the interview. Actually, it was more the other way 'round, and she did most of the talking in the interview.

I didn't hire the guy, naturally, and I asked the wife to stay behind for a moment. I told her she wasn't doing her husband any favors by coming along to the interview, and recommended that hereafter, she stay in the lobby and let her man either sink or swim on his own.

Either that or interview for the job herself. I think she got the point.


12 posted on 03/19/2006 11:44:58 PM PST by John Valentine
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To: Graybeard58
Well, as an educator, I find this is just the next step in the process. We have parents demanding less homework, or more; We have parents hovering and coddling nearly all the miscreants. Today's parents are still living in extended adolescence, so they are certain their kids are not ready to go it alone.
13 posted on 03/20/2006 12:23:00 AM PST by Shery (S. H. in APOland)
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To: Graybeard58

Next it'll be employees bringing their parents to their annual reviews to defend them.


14 posted on 03/20/2006 12:29:11 AM PST by Cementjungle
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To: M203M4

To actually bring a parent into the interview is just unbelieveable to me. Bringing a parent along to see a law school or a medical school seems fine, but it's a given that the parent is going to disappear when anything official begins to transpire.

I will say that I still involve my parents in pretty much every major decision I make, but it's come to the point where they consult with me over major decision they make, too. I like it this way. Even though we live separately, the family still functions as a unit on more important issues. I guess that will change when I'm married and have kids, but as for now, I'm happy with things.


15 posted on 03/20/2006 1:35:50 AM PST by CheyennePress
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To: CheyennePress

To bring a parent seems to miss the point of having a job in the first place - independence!


16 posted on 03/20/2006 2:39:27 AM PST by thoughtomator (Symmetry Inspector #7)
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To: Graybeard58

Those Army commercials that show young people talking with their parents about going into the military walk a very fine line in my view. In my opinion, no one thinking about going into the military should involve their parents or siblings in the decision process. (It would be ok to say, "I've made this decision, now ...".) It isn't a matter of independence, it is laying that "responsible for him/her going in" trip on them in case something happens.


17 posted on 03/20/2006 4:47:05 AM PST by LZ_Bayonet
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To: Shery
Well, as an educator, I find this is just the next step in the process. We have parents demanding less homework, or more; We have parents hovering and coddling nearly all the miscreants.

And we have far too many young adults graduating from high school (and often college) with no "real-life" skills whatsoever. They are faced with the harsh reality that they haven't the slightest idea how to write a resume or interview for a job and they lean on their parents for help.

This trend doesn't surprise me in the least. For every parent that shows up to their kid's interview, I'll bet there are 10 that filled out his/her job application.

18 posted on 03/20/2006 4:59:53 AM PST by Drew68
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To: LZ_Bayonet
In my opinion, no one thinking about going into the military should involve their parents or siblings in the decision process.

Unless they are 17 years old, in which case they need parental consent.

19 posted on 03/20/2006 5:05:03 AM PST by Graybeard58 (Remember and pray for Sgt. Matt Maupin - MIA/POW- Iraq since 04/09/04)
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To: Graybeard58
I have a different take on it than most. A parent, good friend, wife or mentor going on interview is a good thing. Many jobs / careers are very complicated these days and having a second set of ears listening might be a good thing.

Notice I said listening, not actively participating in the interview.

What do you all think goes on in college sports. LeBron James's mother was most active in his career up until he made the NBA.

I am 45 (self employed) and take my father along on many deals I am about to close on. His advice and insight have saved me a couple of times.
20 posted on 03/20/2006 5:06:08 AM PST by mr_hammer (They have eyes, but do not see . . .)
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To: Graybeard58

Hmm. Showing up at interviews may be a new phenomenon, but parents making that one phone call that gets the kid hired is hardly a new phenomenon.


21 posted on 03/20/2006 5:09:40 AM PST by Larry Lucido
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To: Larry Lucido

"but parents making that one phone call that gets the kid hired is hardly a new phenomenon."

That is a bit ridiculous, the applicant should be the one initiating a follow up call not the guardian or parent.


22 posted on 03/20/2006 5:58:33 AM PST by mr_hammer (They have eyes, but do not see . . .)
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To: mr_hammer

Of course. I'm just saying it's not a new phenomenon. It's more like 50,000 years old. "Hello, Og? Yeah, Grunk here. Hey, those were some wild times in the old frat, huh? Look, can you put in a good word for my kid, Gork, on that metallurgy internship? He's a bright kid, and the future is in bronze, you know."


23 posted on 03/20/2006 6:32:11 AM PST by Larry Lucido
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To: Graybeard58

I can't imagine hiring any young person who brought his/her parent to an interview. That would be the end of that application.

When I turned 16, my father told me that allowance time was over and that I needed to get a part time job. That was all he told me. A week later, I was delivering milk from 5-8 AM six days a week.

I needed my father to kick my butt, but that's all I needed him for when it came to getting a job.


24 posted on 03/20/2006 6:39:26 AM PST by MineralMan (godless atheist)
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To: Graybeard58

bump for reference....


25 posted on 03/20/2006 6:44:12 AM PST by Theo
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To: M203M4

I have been explaining to my children ( girl and boy -ages 13 and almost 11) from the time they were in Kindergarten, that at age 18 they will be in college and not at home. Then they will get their own place after they graduate (I don't care if they have 50 room mates). Then they start careers, get married and have kids (in that order only. ) There is no coming home to roost again. Only to visit. The real measure of our success, is our children being self-sufficient.


26 posted on 03/20/2006 6:51:45 AM PST by brwnsuga (Proud, Black, Conservative!)
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To: TR Jeffersonian

ping


27 posted on 03/20/2006 7:05:37 AM PST by kalee
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To: Graybeard58

Please, hire my precious Raymond. You'll love him because Everybody Loves Raymond.

28 posted on 03/20/2006 7:39:45 AM PST by VRWCmember
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To: Graybeard58

Reverse networking?


29 posted on 03/20/2006 7:43:17 AM PST by Old Professer (The critic writes with rapier pen, dips it twice, and writes again.)
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To: VRWCmember

Remember the episode where Marie interfered with Robert's FBI interview? Of course it did come out in the end that she didn't want him to get the job.


30 posted on 03/20/2006 7:44:00 AM PST by cjshapi
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To: Graybeard58

Every position I have any part in hiring for requires the individual to be able to act independantly when I'm not watching. I couldn't hire someone who can't do an interview/hiring process on their own. Seeking advice from others is one thing, bringing them is another.

patent


31 posted on 03/20/2006 7:44:21 AM PST by patent (A baby is God's opinion that life should go on. Carl Sandburg)
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To: Don W

>>>I'm gonna barf. The first time I got fired, my mother WAS the axeman! And I deserved it!

The only time I was fired it was by my mom. I deserved it too. She rehired me when I calmed down and got my head straight.

patent


32 posted on 03/20/2006 7:45:27 AM PST by patent (A baby is God's opinion that life should go on. Carl Sandburg)
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To: Graybeard58

The umbilical cord is certainly staying attached for a long time these days, isn't it?

I agree that anybody who brings daddy to the job interview is automatically disqualified.


33 posted on 03/20/2006 7:45:53 AM PST by linda_22003
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To: thoughtomator
To bring a parent seems to miss the point of having a job in the first place - independence!

no, parents are there wanting to make sure a: that the kids never have to move back in and b: can pay them back for the $100,000 they paid for those kids' college educations.
34 posted on 03/20/2006 7:53:07 AM PST by absolootezer0 ("My God, why have you forsaken us.. no wait, its the liberals that have forsaken you... my bad")
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To: cjshapi

From ruining his lucky coat to faxing a letter to the hiring manager to visiting the guy in person. That is exactly what I thought of when I read this article. If I were interviewing somebody and their parents showed up for the interview I would immediately file the application in the circular file by my desk. I would only want to hire grownups to work for me, not kids who bring mommy and daddy to their interviews.


35 posted on 03/20/2006 7:59:50 AM PST by VRWCmember
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To: Blue Jays
Hi All-

When I first read this story in The Wall Street Journal last week, my mouth nearly hit the floor. If a candidate brought his or her parent to an interview with me, the meeting would be terminated even before it started.

The really fascinating thing was the number of employers who accommodate these parents and even have interactions with them regarding future employment of their sons and daughters. Sending multiple copies of offer letters? Someone has got to be pulling my leg! Couldn't the candidate just read the letter over the telephone to their parents if they wanted their insights?

The sissification of American youth can partially be attributed to the pesky cellular telephone. Every kid in the world has one of these devices and makes contact easy...too easy...between child and parent. My college dorm had a single hallway telephone, which certainly led to independence. I would speak with my folks every two weeks or so, but that's about it. I graduated and love my parents more than ever. This current employment story seems to go against the "fashionable" Hollywood thing about disliking or complaining about ones' parents.

~ Blue Jays ~

36 posted on 03/20/2006 8:00:00 AM PST by Blue Jays (Rock Hard, Ride Free)
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To: Graybeard58

Thanks for posting -- interesting article. I have not heard any reports like this from the businesses I have as clients. My son reports having been contacted by one of his teen-age worker's parents concerning a work schedule that the teen had specifically requested.

On a personal note, I do remember sending lots of leads to my son from Monster, etc., when he was finishing college. The school's placement office was a great asset to him getting that first job. Still there after nearly 2 years and has had one promotion...


37 posted on 03/20/2006 8:02:44 AM PST by T-Bird45
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To: LZ_Bayonet
Those Army commercials that show young people talking with their parents about going into the military walk a very fine line in my view. In my opinion, no one thinking about going into the military should involve their parents or siblings in the decision process. (It would be ok to say, "I've made this decision, now ...".) It isn't a matter of independence, it is laying that "responsible for him/her going in" trip on them in case something happens.

It all depends on whether the parents / siblings are giving advice or making the decision. The former is a good idea; the latter is a bad idea.

38 posted on 03/20/2006 8:11:03 AM PST by You Dirty Rats (I Love Free Republic!)
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To: T-Bird45
My son reports having been contacted by one of his teen-age worker's parents concerning a work schedule that the teen had specifically requested.

That sounds a lot more reasonable to me than these so-called "adult" applicants bringing mommy or daddy along for an interview. Parents do (and should) have some say in the actions of their teenagers. IMHO, the lack of communication on the schedule, though, needs to be sorted out by the teen and his parents, not by his employer.

39 posted on 03/20/2006 8:17:24 AM PST by Bob
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To: LdSentinal

I'm sure there are plenty of 20-somethings who say they have applied for jobs, gone to interviews, etc. when really they were out with their friends and there are no job offers on the horizon.

This is what parents have had to resort to, to ensure there is "end time" to when these free-loading kids will be leaving that they don't have to look for with binoculars!


40 posted on 03/20/2006 8:26:05 AM PST by Apple Blossom (...around here, city hall is something of a between meals snack.)
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To: brwnsuga
Then they will get their own place after they graduate (I don't care if they have 50 room mates).

That's an ideal, not yet a fact. By the way, I wish you well and your children success in life.

41 posted on 03/20/2006 11:07:41 AM PST by Graybeard58 (Remember and pray for Sgt. Matt Maupin - MIA/POW- Iraq since 04/09/04)
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To: cjshapi
Of course it did come out in the end that she didn't want him to get the job.

If she hadn't burned his lucky suit we would have gotten it.

42 posted on 03/20/2006 11:09:25 AM PST by Graybeard58 (Remember and pray for Sgt. Matt Maupin - MIA/POW- Iraq since 04/09/04)
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To: Graybeard58
If she hadn't burned his lucky suit we he would have gotten it.
43 posted on 03/20/2006 11:23:00 AM PST by Graybeard58 (Remember and pray for Sgt. Matt Maupin - MIA/POW- Iraq since 04/09/04)
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