Skip to comments.Fear not, smart women
Posted on 11/16/2006 7:07:33 AM PST by qam1
Those who say that men don't like women with brains and careers are misleading women, says New York columnist Christine B. Whelan, author of "Why Smart Men Marry Smart Women," published this year.
Ms. Whelan, 29, says she wrote the book, in part, to respond to New York Times columnist Maureen Dowd's claim in her 2005 book "Are Men Necessary?" that success decreases a woman's chance for marriage.
"This isn't good news," Ms. Whelan said about reading the book when she was single and had just finished her doctoral degree in economic and social history. "The social scientist in me knew better than to accept this conventional wisdom without doing research of my own."
Ms. Whelan researched U.S. Census Bureau data, commissioned a national opinion survey and conducted interviews with more than 100 high-achieving men and women in nine cities to gather material for her book. What she found was that high-achieving women -- women with graduate degrees and/or an income in the top 10 percent of women in their age group -- married at the same rate as all other women did, but later in life, and that outdated information and misinterpreted statistics had women believing otherwise.
She calls these women SWANS, or Strong Women Achievers, No Spouse
The statistics Ms. Whelan provides in her book show that American women marry by an average age of 30 if they have a graduate degree, the median age for all women to marry is 25, and 90 percent of women marry by 44.
"Ms. Dowd is painting the wrong picture for our generation," Ms. Whelan said, adding that Ms. Dowd was right in saying that prior to the 1980s, it was more difficult for smart, successful women to get married and have children............
(Excerpt) Read more at washingtontimes.com ...
A typical argument women like to use is: "Men just can't accept a stong, independant woman"
I'd liek to see one describe the difference between "strong and independent" and "self centered, and uncompromising"
That constitutes less success. They stay single until their fertility is almost gone. Furthermore, they have less of their lives to spend with their spouse. Marrying at 35 is not "just as good" as marrying at 25.
Now that I've finished my education and have a decent-paying job, I'm less interested in "finding a man" than I was before. I'm more interested in home decorating, salvaging my finances after years of student loans, and getting good at my job. I'm finally getting my life set up the way I want and honestly, I'm a little afraid that a man will kind of mess it up. I like men (they smell good) but I don't like cleaning up after them, or watching them spend money on things we don't need while things we do need (IMO) go unsatisfied.
Sad, but true.
Yes. Yes we do! ;-)
(I know that was a bit smarmy, but it was just too easy to pass up!)
Yes, a difference which has been blurred by decades of rabid feminism. Unfortunately.
Personally, I have no problem whatsoever with strong women -- I wish there were more of them. As it stands, I married one, and remain happily in that arrangement. $:-)
LOLOLOL. I like that!!
Seriously, one of the things I found most attractive about my husband was that he never uttered the phrase, "You're just tryin' to make me feel dumb by using big words."
I don't know if it's a generalized reality or if it's just me, but IMHO women like men who are more intelligent and successful than they are.
Just think ..if I had been a little smarter I could have married a moron! /s
Just teasing ya. :)
Everyone is different. That's the bottom line.
The traditional feminists are the ones trying to put people in little pigeon holes so the can take back some kind of a platform.
Me thinks their days are numbered with forces like "Feminists for Life' emerging.
My sister-in-law is of that persuasion, that women are better than men, blah blah blah. She has turned two perfectly good boys into spineless men who are afraid of making any kind of decision on their own without mommy's ok (or some other woman for that matter). If either one of them gets married, their wives are going to have one heck of a time turning them into real men- if that can be done.
The problem is women who confuse "smart" with "educated." No amount of education will make a bitter moonbat smart.
I know some women like that. I think the are closet Lezbos myself.
I'm an independent female. I raised both my sons and my daughters to be independent but showed an example of love between my husband and I.
Somehow they all got married. Imagine that.
The nice thing about the hard core feminists is that they are not reproducing themselves in mass anymore since a lot of them came out in the open. It's feminazi suicide. LOL.
" If either one of them gets married, their wives are going to have one heck of a time turning them into real men- if that can be done."
Since I'm an old duffer, I can't say for sure, but I'm guessing that many women today would be very happy with those spineless men.
On a related note, those of us men who haven't had the spine-ectomy. Generally we're referred to as being cranky or mean. If you have an opinion, and express it, that's totally mean. So I take on the role of curmudgeon.
When Ann can have a few children (or four) then maybe I'll post her picture.
I'll give it a go: I consider myself "strong and independent" in a good way. Taking my kids out of an abusive marriage, I now find myself a single parent. I have to be strong for my kids and I consider myself independent, not out searching for another man to support me and my kids - who would find that attracive? I wouldn't consider that self-centered, since my focus is my children, but I may be uncompromising since I have very strong values I'm trying to raise them with. Then again, I'm sure some men have those same uncompromising values. ;o)
But generally, you are correct.
Cranky is ok. My husband and I are both "cranky"...but we also have a sense of humor.
Our children think it's hilarious to watch us go from an all-out argument to laughing hysterically at each other because we sound so much alike.
Happens every time. You just gotta be there. :^)