Skip to comments.Fear not, smart women
Posted on 11/16/2006 7:07:33 AM PST by qam1
Those who say that men don't like women with brains and careers are misleading women, says New York columnist Christine B. Whelan, author of "Why Smart Men Marry Smart Women," published this year.
Ms. Whelan, 29, says she wrote the book, in part, to respond to New York Times columnist Maureen Dowd's claim in her 2005 book "Are Men Necessary?" that success decreases a woman's chance for marriage.
"This isn't good news," Ms. Whelan said about reading the book when she was single and had just finished her doctoral degree in economic and social history. "The social scientist in me knew better than to accept this conventional wisdom without doing research of my own."
Ms. Whelan researched U.S. Census Bureau data, commissioned a national opinion survey and conducted interviews with more than 100 high-achieving men and women in nine cities to gather material for her book. What she found was that high-achieving women -- women with graduate degrees and/or an income in the top 10 percent of women in their age group -- married at the same rate as all other women did, but later in life, and that outdated information and misinterpreted statistics had women believing otherwise.
She calls these women SWANS, or Strong Women Achievers, No Spouse
The statistics Ms. Whelan provides in her book show that American women marry by an average age of 30 if they have a graduate degree, the median age for all women to marry is 25, and 90 percent of women marry by 44.
"Ms. Dowd is painting the wrong picture for our generation," Ms. Whelan said, adding that Ms. Dowd was right in saying that prior to the 1980s, it was more difficult for smart, successful women to get married and have children............
(Excerpt) Read more at washingtontimes.com ...
"what men like" is diverse because men are diverse.
Bitches was already taken.
(Easy ladies....just joking)
Ping list for the discussion of the politics and social (and sometimes nostalgic) aspects that directly effects Generation Reagan / Generation-X (Those born from 1965-1981) including all the spending previous generations (i.e. The Baby Boomers) are doing that Gen-X and Y will end up paying for.
Freep mail me to be added or dropped. See my home page for details and previous articles.
The problem with feminism is it tells women they don't need men, and this is a false premise. It is as false as telling men they don't need women.
Men and women are different, complimentary, and should not convince themselves that they are better off independent. We are always better off together.
The problem is, many women just don't know the difference between strength and bitchery.
Despite what that old fool Maureen Dowd says to make her unappealing self feel better, I would say that most men prefer smart women. I know I do. Nothing grates on your skin like being around dumb people all the time.
That's a down to earth way of looking at it.
By the way, I like your about page "Common Sense Conservative".
I like to think of myself as a Realist Conservative.
"Men and women are different, complimentary, and should not convince themselves that they are better off independent. We are always better off together."
Absolutely correct. And in total opposition to what the social scientists want you to believe. Men and women are the same in their eyes, the only difference being socialization, (this is stupid beyond words).
I sympathize with young men these days. Many women have bought into the liberal dogma, and believe men and women are the same, and many women are out to prove they are better men than the men they date.
I'm glad I'm married and out of that dating pool.
You know the type. Their male counterpart is that type we refer to as "assholes", but I digress.
At one point in a meeting she had been acting particularly misandrystic with some of the other women in the gathering, and she came out with that old canard bemoaning her life, "Where have all the good men gone?"
To which I sweetly replied, "You're too late. They're married to the good women".
my lady had a phd. AND she's smart as well. ther reason that a lot of 'smoart women' can't find a guy is they ther're dumb enough to beleive the feminist agenda. nobody decent is gonna hang around a woman who constantly bashes men, and whines about how bad it is to be a woman.
real smart women are highly attractive to good men. very much so.
Well...I have worked in the biotech and medical fields. There are tons of great looking girls in traditional "nerd" positions who have no problems getting dates.
Has Dowd considered the possibility that she's a miserable beyotch?
"...likely to marry ceterus paribus than women who do not exhibit those traits."
Gee, does knowing Latin make you smarter than someone who doesn't know Latin? Are you in the camp of Teresa Heinz who is of a belief that the more languages you speak, the smarter you are? (Which would make Mrs. Heinz one smart cookie?)
Is English so imprecise and limited that you can't express your thoughts in English? Or are you just trying to telegraph something about your own character traits?
Smart women frequently marry men who aren't as intelligent as they are, but successful women are loath to settle for men who aren't as high on the social or corporate ladder. The higher she climbs, the fewer the romantic options.
A typical argument women like to use is: "Men just can't accept a stong, independant woman"
I'd liek to see one describe the difference between "strong and independent" and "self centered, and uncompromising"
That constitutes less success. They stay single until their fertility is almost gone. Furthermore, they have less of their lives to spend with their spouse. Marrying at 35 is not "just as good" as marrying at 25.
Now that I've finished my education and have a decent-paying job, I'm less interested in "finding a man" than I was before. I'm more interested in home decorating, salvaging my finances after years of student loans, and getting good at my job. I'm finally getting my life set up the way I want and honestly, I'm a little afraid that a man will kind of mess it up. I like men (they smell good) but I don't like cleaning up after them, or watching them spend money on things we don't need while things we do need (IMO) go unsatisfied.
Sad, but true.
Yes. Yes we do! ;-)
(I know that was a bit smarmy, but it was just too easy to pass up!)
Yes, a difference which has been blurred by decades of rabid feminism. Unfortunately.
Personally, I have no problem whatsoever with strong women -- I wish there were more of them. As it stands, I married one, and remain happily in that arrangement. $:-)
LOLOLOL. I like that!!
Seriously, one of the things I found most attractive about my husband was that he never uttered the phrase, "You're just tryin' to make me feel dumb by using big words."
I don't know if it's a generalized reality or if it's just me, but IMHO women like men who are more intelligent and successful than they are.
Just think ..if I had been a little smarter I could have married a moron! /s
Just teasing ya. :)
Everyone is different. That's the bottom line.
The traditional feminists are the ones trying to put people in little pigeon holes so the can take back some kind of a platform.
Me thinks their days are numbered with forces like "Feminists for Life' emerging.
My sister-in-law is of that persuasion, that women are better than men, blah blah blah. She has turned two perfectly good boys into spineless men who are afraid of making any kind of decision on their own without mommy's ok (or some other woman for that matter). If either one of them gets married, their wives are going to have one heck of a time turning them into real men- if that can be done.
The problem is women who confuse "smart" with "educated." No amount of education will make a bitter moonbat smart.
I know some women like that. I think the are closet Lezbos myself.
I'm an independent female. I raised both my sons and my daughters to be independent but showed an example of love between my husband and I.
Somehow they all got married. Imagine that.
The nice thing about the hard core feminists is that they are not reproducing themselves in mass anymore since a lot of them came out in the open. It's feminazi suicide. LOL.
" If either one of them gets married, their wives are going to have one heck of a time turning them into real men- if that can be done."
Since I'm an old duffer, I can't say for sure, but I'm guessing that many women today would be very happy with those spineless men.
On a related note, those of us men who haven't had the spine-ectomy. Generally we're referred to as being cranky or mean. If you have an opinion, and express it, that's totally mean. So I take on the role of curmudgeon.
When Ann can have a few children (or four) then maybe I'll post her picture.
I'll give it a go: I consider myself "strong and independent" in a good way. Taking my kids out of an abusive marriage, I now find myself a single parent. I have to be strong for my kids and I consider myself independent, not out searching for another man to support me and my kids - who would find that attracive? I wouldn't consider that self-centered, since my focus is my children, but I may be uncompromising since I have very strong values I'm trying to raise them with. Then again, I'm sure some men have those same uncompromising values. ;o)
But generally, you are correct.
Cranky is ok. My husband and I are both "cranky"...but we also have a sense of humor.
Our children think it's hilarious to watch us go from an all-out argument to laughing hysterically at each other because we sound so much alike.
Happens every time. You just gotta be there. :^)
Ditto that!! - and it applies to men and women.
I don't mind strong, career minded women at all, provided that they are not spoiled, obnoxious, self-absorbed, selfish, materialistic control freaks as my experience has led me to believe many of them are.
Sounds like the ones you met need to grown up or see a therapist.
I think you meant "complementary." (This is where my ex-DH would've told me to "dummy up.")
All I know is that being married to a smart woman has been good for my health, my finances, and my love life.
I love smart women. I just don't like self-centered overly ambitious ones who leave heel marks in piles of bodies (and kids in day care) on their way to the top.
Probably why slick Willie chose Monica instead of Hillary, he prefers smart women
I never could find my magical intelligence turn off valve either. I guess I spent too much time reading, writing, researching, building computers and various other "non-intelligent" activities to find it.
Unless he doesn't know one way or the other on first sight. I remember as a teenage girl I would want to go check out the cute guys. One acquaintance said I should be looking for someone who had a good personality and was intelligent. I never went up to a guy and thought, he's the ugliest thing alive, but he might have a great personality, so I'll go after him.
My husband noticed my -- uh --assets first, then found out about the intelligence after we talked.