Cruise 'is Christ' of Scientology

Sun online ^ | January 23, 2007 | EMILY SMITH

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TOM Cruise is the new “Christ” of Scientology, according to leaders of the cult-like religion.

The Mission: Impossible star has been told he has been “chosen” to spread the word of his faith throughout the world.

And leader David Miscavige believes that in future, Cruise, 44, will be worshipped like Jesus for his work to raise awareness of the religion.

A source close to the actor, who has risen to one of the church’s top levels, said: “Tom has been told he is Scientology’s Christ-like figure.

“Like Christ, he’s been criticised for his views. But future generations will realise he was right.”

Cruise joined the Church of Scientology in the ’80s. Leader L Ron Hubbard claimed humans bear traces of an ancient alien civilisation.

[metmom]

I think I'm going to puke.

[ArrogantBustard]

We'll leave the stoning, burning, bombing, beheading, etc. to the followers of The Religion of Peace. Tom & Dave will have to answer for their blasphemy to a Higher Authority, Who will probably not be amused. I'm inclined to leave matters of final judgement in His hands.

[wagglebee]

That's fine, let him throw temper tantrums on national television and further demonstrate what a joke scientology is.

[E Rocc]

Higher Authority, Who will probably not be amused.

If (as I suspect) Voltaire had a point, said Higher Power just might be extremely amused.

"You actually believed that" (struggle to hold straight face proves beyond even omnipotence).

-Eric

[ArrogantBustard]

"You actually believed that" (struggle to hold straight face proves beyond even omnipotence).

Psalm 59, 7-8: Behold, they belch out with their mouth: swords are in their lips: for who, say they, doth hear? But thou, O LORD, shalt laugh at them; thou shalt have all the heathen in derision.

[WKB]

Baptist ping

[trillabodilla]

Sorry, Tom, you're not Christ.

I just spoke with Him this morning, and He told me so.

;-)

[AD from SpringBay]

Three days after Cruise dies we'll see about the whole 'Christ of Scientology' title. Until then, I'm not persuaded.

[PennsylvaniaMom]

One of my guilty pleasures is reading Hollywood news type blogs (PerezHilton; Hollywood Grind; TMZ; MollyGood). All the blogs offer readers the opportunity to comment (just like FR, but trashy). Anything that mentions TomKat (his relationship handle with the Mrs.) brings loads of (hysterically funny) comments on Scientology. The great unwashed masses have a field day with the 'thetans.' Scientology has done more to hurt his career (or public persona) than coming out of the closet ever would.

During the recent Beckomania that hit So. Cal. when Beckham signed with LA soccer, it was stated by Beckham that he 'sought the counsel of his good friend, Tom Cruise.' Wow. The backlash (online) was a scream.

[martin_fierro]

Who will be cast in the role of Marty Magdalene?

What.

[NeoCaveman]

It was a "Last Temptation of Christ" joke with a Tom Cruise gay twist.

Of course, if I had to explain it, it probably wasn't a good joke on my part.

[kimmie7]

ditto

[steve-b]

Soon to be starring in "The Last Temptation of Tom."

Or "Monty Python's Life Of Tom".

[steve-b]

I'll turn Cruise in to the local mental health department for thirty pieces of silver. Kissing him on the cheek will cost a lot more.

With Cruise's ego, the cheek is not where he expects to be kissed.

[N. Theknow]

Well, he makes bread out of whine, so he is Scientology's Christ for a host of reasons.

[steve-b]

WOW! I didn't know he was gay!?!?!?.............

It's one of those obscure things you might not have ever heard about, like the fact that John Kerry was in Vietnam.

[steve-b]

Like Christ, he's been criticised for his views.

So everybody on FR is Christ, then?

[Tijeras_Slim]

LOL!

[null and void]

Who will be cast in the role of Marty Magdalene?

What.

Sounds like we have a volunteer...

[steve-b]

You might want to check out these two hilarious reviews of this cinematic masterpiece.