Skip to comments.The Ham Sandwich From Hell
Posted on 04/25/2007 4:33:40 AM PDT by expatguy
Benign and seemingly harmless to many, above we see the "ham sandwich" from hell. Unless your name is Mama Cass or you happen to be a Muslim, then you have nothing to worry about.
The "ham sandwich" is the natural predator of devout Muslims around the globe. While it might seem to be nothing more than an innoculous organic compound to some, or perhaps a tasty lunch menu item to others, the "ham sandwich" inflicts fear and terror into the hearts and minds of Muslims, and possesses the the capacity to devour the very soul of a Muslim should they happen to venture to close to it.
Whether it is Minnesota cab drivers refusing passengers who are carrying alcohol or students in Maine frightened and offended by a ham sandwich, Im constantly amazed at both the audacity of these new immigrants and the gullibility of well-meaning Americans who zealously fall all over themselves in these futile and pathetic attempts to appease.
Aided and abbetted by liberal politicians and quisling propagandists, the effrontery and supposed indignity of these reprobates is not founded in any religious doctrine. It is founded in their desire to recreate America into a sick parody of their own home countries, or as it is in many cases, simply to achive "victimhood" ($$$).
Claiming that the "close proximity" to either alcohol or pork violates the tenets of their religion is nothing more than cleverly crafted subterfuge with the sole intent of striking it big in the litigation lottery.
The reality is that Muslims, like Jews or even Rastafarians for that matter abstain for eating pork as one of the tenets of their religion.
So when Steven Wessler, the executive director with the Center for the Prevention of Hate Violence says that the close proximity of a "ham sandwich" is "extraordinarily hurtful and degrading" to Muslims and that their "religion prohibits them from being around ham...[sic]". he just proves himself to be either a charlatan or a patsy.
Unless you have a Somalian student hogtied and are shoving baby back ribs and beer down his throat then you basically have nothing to worry about.
On that note, in my many years spent in both Indonesia and Malaysia I have never once come across a Muslim taxi driver who has refused a passenger who was carrying alcohol or heard of a Muslim who believed that the "close proximity" of pork violated the tenets of their religion.
Dont Be Duped!!!
Gosh, from the way some of these idiots carry on, the only weapon you need in the war on terror is said Ham Sandwich!!
That thing needs to be indicted (after I take a bite).
Even if it were the religion of peace, I would have to pass on the glories of Islam since it would deny me the joy of determining how and where I spend eternity.
It’s long been said that a good prosecutor can get a grand jury to indict a ham sandwich. Now I understand why.
This is just like the Imams who got thrown off the airplane. It is a scam for money.
All the Muslims we've killed or who have blown themselves up should be buried with hog parts. Might just win this thing really quickly.
Public schools are not supposed to involve themselves in religious matters. The fact that this school enforces the religious mores of the Islamic faith is a violation of the Constitution.
I saw an article posted here yesterday about this. How would the immigrant children know what a ham sandwich looks like, if it has always been forbidden to them?
Yeah, kind of silly thought.
He knows all about ham but apparently nothing of their individual soul or heart.
No wonder they fear him he's at best a fraud and at worst a psychopath. In fact that describes most muslims.
One said it looks like America and Britain are becoming Islamic extremists while they expect the rest of the Muslim world to be moderates.
Spam is better.
It is difficult to dip/smear a bullet with actual HAM. You can grip half a dozen 7.62 in your hand and dip them easily. You can treat even more .223—but I personally don’t favor the mousegun these days.
It’s good—in SO MANY ways.
I ythink BBQ Pork sounds good with BBQ beans with onions & bacon.
morning bookmark ping
You want a beer and some pork rinds with that ham sandwich, Sinbad?
While of undetermined veracity, this certainly warrants further investigation as a weapon against those who hate and killn us:
Once in US history an episode of Islamic terrorism was very quickly stopped. It happened in the Philippines about 1911, when Gen. John J. Pershing was in command of the garrison. There had been numerous Islamic terrorist attacks, so “Black Jack” told his boys to catch the perps and teach them a lesson.
Forced to dig their own graves, the terrorists were all tied to posts, execution style. The US soldiers then brought in pigs and slaughtered them, rubbing their bullets in the blood and fat. Thus, the terrorists were terrorized; they saw that they would be contaminated with hogs’ blood. This would mean that they could not enter Heaven, even if they died as terrorist martyrs.
All but one was shot, their bodies dumped into the grave, and the hog guts dumped atop the bodies. The lone survivor was allowed to escape back to the terrorist camp and tell his brethren what happened to the others. This brought a stop to terrorism in the Philippines for the next 50 years.
What do they want next? Take it out of the meat counter at the stores.. Are we going to need a special deli that only sells ham?
We just gotta pack "MEAT"!
“This brought a stop to terrorism in the Philippines for the next 50 years.”
I’ve heard this story before. Call my gullible, but can anyone verify it’s truthfulness?
Personally, my weapon of choice is the ham grenade.
Now, that’s a fearsome piece of meat. It is meat, isn’t it ?
"Muslims, do not choose among the unbelievers for your friends." [Koran Sura 4:144] "But strike at their necks..." [Koran Sura 8:12] "Hell shall be their home, an evil fate." [Koran sura 9:73].
“deny me the joy of determining how and where I spend eternity.”
For it is by Grace you have been saved, through faith - and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God - -not by works, so that no one can boast Ephesians 2:8
I certainly did not mean to say that, other than making the choice to accept the gift of salvation, that I am in any way, shape or form responsible for where I spend eternity. It is indeed a gift from God and certainly not the result of anything I did or will do!
Lots of bacon bits on the salad.
I shall add a ham sandwich to my protective gear at once.
The Americans who fall all over themselves are few in number and neither gullible nor well-meaning. It is a liberal program aided and abetted by by minorities, in this case Muslims, not the other way around. Steven Wessler may be a charlatan but is certainly not a patsy; he's a cold-blooded white hating racist who doesn't give a damn about Muslim hurt, he just uses them as a weapon.
I would be in favor of this !
A new a lunatic fresh for Pakistan years ago. He spent the first couple af months determining where all the pork was. He didn't like hot dogs at all and kept his distance from them and the people who ate them.
Hell's hot dogs. The prefered delight of the unclean.
The aroma of bacon really gets them up.
Correct me if I am wrong, but from what I have heard any products containing pork are completely off limits to all servicemen serving in Iraq.
Not at all. The chow halls serve pork bacon, pork chops, pork roast, pork BBQ, etc. regularly.
Heck, a lot of the Iraqis eat pork. When I needed to get 750 hot dogs for July 4 last year, my local buyer couldn't find that many in the all beef variety, but he was able to get plenty of pork hot dogs. Out in town.
Go figure. ;-)
There are many restrictions about what you can send and in many cases; you need to ask what the soldiers actually want. A few no-no's first:
No Pork. No Alcohol in any form. No Pornography. No Magazines that depict the human body (male or female) in an undressed state (IE: Swimsuit issues, body building magazines, Victoria's Secret). No weapons of any sort.
From the following:
Well, there’s certainly plenty of pork around here.
Balance the ham sandwich with slitting throats and flying planes into buildings.
Which one should produce the most outrage?
Which one does?
Lewiston, ME, Generic E-Mail Address: email@example.com
Steven Wessler, Maine’s #1 dhimmi
CPHV Portland, ME
This story has already been corrected. http://www.sunjournal.com/story/209231-3/LewistonAuburn/Ham_report_stirs_mess/
It was actually a parody, and didn’t actually occur. (We all still run into the fact that just because a “news story” is on the internet doesn’t make it accurate.)
Maybe the folks in Maine don’t deserve any irate emails after all.
Mama Cass dies of a myocardial infarction, not choking on a sandwich. Here’s the info:
Guiltless ham sandwiches continue to be impugned unfairly!