Skip to comments.Inmate amputates his own p***s in Monroe (WA)
Posted on 02/20/2009 6:00:04 PM PST by llevrok
MONROE A convicted murderer at the Washington state prison complex in Monroe was hospitalized after his second attempt to cut off his penis.
A spokeswoman for the Monroe Correctional Complex, says the 49-year-old inmate has a history of mental illness and already had amputated much of his genitalia several years ago.
Corrections Department spokesman Chad Lewis identified the inmate as John Forrester.
Forrester apparently used a razor blade to cut off what remained on Thursday. Kopoian tells The Herald in Everett that he was taken to Harborview Medical Center in Seattle with serious cuts to the groin. His condition was not immediately available Thursday night.
Kopoian says prisoners are permitted basic necessities including razors under state law.
Kopoian says Forrester was convicted on July 1, 1977, for aggravated first-degree murder and was sentenced to life without parole.
(Excerpt) Read more at seattletimes.nwsource.com ...
Why’d you edit the title when the word penis is right there in the first sentence?
trying to keep the admin mod's happy, I guess.
Self imposed Darwin Award winner.
Correction: Joan Forrester.
Why not let him?
Yeah, why did you remove part of the penis from the title?
Wow! I have penis envy!
Not really. Just kidding. Ahem.
They shouldn’t have provided him a razor though. He should have had to use a plastic spoon.
That’s gonna leave a mark...
The penis mightier than the sword.
Well, aren’t you cocky.
“I don’t know how you guys walk around with those things”-Elaine Benes
Lorena Bobbit approves!
I wonder it it was in solidarity with the newly castrated America?
It’s a shame such a good thread is destined for the moderators’ razor.
Hah! You guys are goin’ off!
A sure call for a little Monty Python:
“This parrot is no more. It has ceased to be. It’s expired and gone to meet its maker. This is a late parrot. It’s a stiff. Bereft of life, it rests in peace. If you hadn’t nailed it to the perch, it would be pushing up the daisies. It’s rung down the curtain and joined the choir invisible. This is an ex-parrot”.
You get some sort of all time funniest pun in all of Freeperdom! Snort*Snort*Snort*
Wow? He’s really going to have short cummings now?????
The guy was a prisoner. Living in the penis tough. Doing hard time takes balls. The guy just couldn’t hack it anymore.
Well, actually I guess he could hack it.
Cuz he did, you know?
“The penis mightier than the sword.”
Ding, ding, ding we have a winner!
And little else...
These lyrics are borderline. Note - I don’t listen to this album when the kids are around! (Some great, albet weird tunes though):
LAMENT, by Jim Morrison (The Doors), Album: An American Prayer
Lament for my cock
Sore and crucified
I seek to know you
Aquiring soulful wisdom
You can open walls of mystery
How to aquire death in the morning show
TV death which the child absorbs
Deathwell mystery which makes me write
Slow train, the death of my cock gives life
Forgive the poor old people who gave us entry
Taught us god in the child’s prayer in the night.
Ancient wise satyr
Sing your ode to my cock.
Caress it’s lament
Stiffen and guide us, we frozen
The knowledge of cancer
To speak to the heart
And give the great gift
Words power trance
This stable friend and the beast of his zoo
Wild haired chicks
Women flowering in their summit
Monsters of skin
Each color connects
To create the boat
Which rocks the race
Could any hell be more horrible
I pressed her thigh and death smiled
Death, old friend
Death and my cock are the world
I can forgive my injuries in the name of
Wisdom - luxury - romance
Sentence upon sentence
Words are the healing lament
For the death of my cock’s spirit
Has no meaning in the soft fire
Words got me the wound and will get me well
I you believe it
All join now and lament the death of my cock
A tongue of knowledge in the feathered night
Boys get crazy in the head and suffer
I sacrifice my cock on the alter of silence.
LOL, that's about the wittiest post i've ever seen, but in this case, the sword is mightier than the pen (is).
And that’s what’s wrong with today’s penile system.
He was hoping medicaid wouldg\ give him a longer, leaner one.
Oh, my! Ping.
King Missile - Detachable Penis
I woke up this morning with a bad hangover
And my penis was missing again.
This happens all the time.
This comes in handy a lot of the time.
I can leave it home, when I think it’s gonna get me in trouble,
or I can rent it out, when I don’t need it.
But now and then I go to a party, get drunk,
and the next morning I can’t for the life of me
remember what I did with it.
First I looked around my apartment, and I couldn’t find it.
So I called up the place where the party was,
they hadn’t seen it either.
I asked them to check the medicine cabinet
‘cause for some reason I leave it there sometimes
But not this time.
So I told them if it pops up to let me know.
I called a few people who were at the party,
but they were no help either.
I was starting to get desperate.
I really don’t like being without my penis for too long.
It makes me feel like less of a man,
and I really hate having to sit down every time I take a leak.
After a few hours of searching the house,
and calling everyone I could think of,
I was starting to get very depressed,
so I went to the Kiev, and ate breakfast.
Then, as I walked down Second Avenue towards St. Mark’s Place,
where all those people sell used books and other junk on the street,
I saw my penis lying on a blanket
next to a broken toaster oven.
Some guy was selling it.
I had to buy it off him.
He wanted twenty-two bucks, but I talked him down to seventeen.
I took it home, washed it off,
and put it back on. I was happy again. Complete.
People sometimes tell me I should get it permanently attached,
but I don’t know.
Even though sometimes it’s a pain in the ass,
I like having a detachable penis.
If people keep this up their gonna get “creamed” by the mods.
Definitely not a good time to lose one’s head......
There are consequences to going off half cocked, and spouting off.
I just pinged you a couple minutes ago. Surprised you came so quickly. : )
What an unfortunate allergy.
Beware those who are foaming at the mouth.
It will be re-attached at taxpayer exoense.
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