"Early in March Darwin moved to London to be near this work, joining Lyell's social circle of scientists and savants such as Charles Babbage, who described God as a programmer of laws. John Herschels letter on the "mystery of mysteries" of new species was widely discussed, with explanations sought in laws of nature, not ad hoc miracles. Darwin stayed with his freethinking brother Erasmus, part of this Whig circle and close friend of writer Harriet Martineau who promoted Malthusianism underlying the controversial Whig Poor Law reforms to stop welfare from causing overpopulation and more poverty. As a Unitarian she welcomed the radical implications of transmutation of species, promoted by Grant and younger surgeons influenced by Geoffroy, but anathema to Anglicans defending social order. In mid-July 1837 Darwin started his B notebook on Transmutation of Species, and on page 36 wrote I think above the first evolutionary tree.In their first meeting to discuss his detailed findings, Gould told Darwin that the Galápagos mockingbirds from different islands were separate species, not just varieties, and the finch group included the wrens. Darwin had not labelled the finches by island, but from the notes of others on the Beagle, including FitzRoy, he allocated species to islands. The two rheas were also distinct species, and on 14 March Darwin announced how their distribution changed going southwards. By mid-March, Darwin was speculating in his Red Notebook on the possibility that "one species does change into another" to explain the geographical distribution of living species such as the rheas, and extinct ones such as Macrauchenia like a giant guanaco. His thoughts on lifespan, asexual reproduction and sexual reproduction developed in his B notebook around mid-July on to variation in offspring "to adapt & alter the race to changing world" explaining the Galápagos tortoises, mockingbirds and rheas. He sketched branching descent, then a genealogical branching of a single evolutionary tree..."
Animal sex is a very peculiar obsession although not uncommon among hillbilly kids named "Buzzie" with crewcuts in rural areas who also can't leave mailboxes and M-80s alone for some reason. The primitive ape men fantasies part is interesting though. But bird sex is weird even by Victorian dork standards.
I started reading Gould's essays in Natural History in 1974. Since then I've read a couple dozen books on Darwin and evolution without encountering the phrase "bird sex."
You obviously need professional help.