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Joel Osteen Heresy Gauge
What?..Um theological satire ^ | August 6, 2007 | Seth

Posted on 04/28/2009 1:02:55 PM PDT by Alex Murphy

How to determine when Joel Osteen is speaking heresy:



TOPICS: Evangelical Christian; Humor; Ministry/Outreach; Theology
KEYWORDS: feelgoodgospel; goobergospel; hinnjr; hiswifegotinafight; joelosteen; osteen; tbnclone
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1 posted on 04/28/2009 1:02:55 PM PDT by Alex Murphy
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To: Alex Murphy

Heheh. You prots really dislike these guys, eh?


2 posted on 04/28/2009 1:04:12 PM PDT by mbraynard (You are the Republican Party. See you at the precinct meeting.)
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To: mbraynard

Have RCers embraced him?


3 posted on 04/28/2009 1:07:43 PM PDT by Laissez-faire capitalist (Keep working! Welfare cases and their liberal enablers are counting on you!)
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To: mbraynard

Yup, kinda like the way you caths dislike wayward priests.


4 posted on 04/28/2009 1:08:27 PM PDT by AxelPaulsenJr (Please God Save The United States From The Democrats, and Barack Hussein Obama. Amen.)
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To: Laissez-faire capitalist

NOOOOOOOOOOOOO....he seems like a FRAUD!!!


5 posted on 04/28/2009 1:08:57 PM PDT by Ann Archy (Abortion....the Human Sacrifice to the god of Convenience.)
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To: Ann Archy

I agree.


6 posted on 04/28/2009 1:09:40 PM PDT by Laissez-faire capitalist (Keep working! Welfare cases and their liberal enablers are counting on you!)
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Comment #7 Removed by Moderator

To: Alex Murphy

Fantastic! This man has no business preaching “The Gospel”.

Wait...that is exactly his “business”.

Osteen makes me physically ill when I mistakenly happen upon him speaking. My Savior...the Lord Jesus Christ...will never know this heretic.


8 posted on 04/28/2009 1:10:28 PM PDT by The Unknown Republican
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To: ArmyBratproud

Wow, someone got up today on the wrong side of the army cot.


9 posted on 04/28/2009 1:12:37 PM PDT by AxelPaulsenJr (Please God Save The United States From The Democrats, and Barack Hussein Obama. Amen.)
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To: Laissez-faire capitalist

Christian pastors preach “Christ and Him crucified.” Joel Osteen seems to preach “Joel Osteen and him glorified.” When Joel preaches about Christ, he often says Jesus is an example for us, not our Savior. Hence the hesitancy on the part of many traditional Christians to jump aboard the Osteen bandwagon.


10 posted on 04/28/2009 1:12:44 PM PDT by T Baden
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To: Alex Murphy
He is a heretic according traditional or classical Christianity. The problem with many Christians is that they have no understanding of historic Christianity. They think that the Gospel started with them. What Christians have believed, taught, and confessed for two thousand years means absolutely nothing. The current non-historic Christian is simply moralistic, therapeutic, deism (MTD). The god of Osteen exists to make you feel good about yourself is little more than a Cosmic Bellhop. Osteen’s god has nothing in common with either the God of the Bible or historic Christianity.
11 posted on 04/28/2009 1:19:21 PM PDT by Nosterrex
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To: T Baden

I’m hesitant to jump on any of them.

I don’t trust all the feelgood psychobabble prosperity preaching I see on TV.


12 posted on 04/28/2009 1:20:07 PM PDT by Califreak (Obama is Swahili for "Death to America")
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To: Alex Murphy

He’s kind of a modern-day update of Norman Vincent Peale “Power of Positive Thinking”. He generally gives good advice on how to live your life with a positive attitude, but I don’t view his talks as particularly religous in nature. On the whole, I’d rather my kids listen to him than go to a Metallica concert, but it’s not really a substitute for going to church.


13 posted on 04/28/2009 1:22:35 PM PDT by CaptainMorgantown
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To: Alex Murphy

Hey, all I need to know about Joel Osteen and his perfect hair is that he actually stated that he thinks Comrade 0bama is doing a great job, and “loves the Lord”, and NOBODY who claims to be a man of God could possibly make such a statement about a pro-abortion liar and thug that has more blood on their hands than King Herod himself.

Joel Osteen is oppressed by a lying spirit of deception, woe unto anybody who gives his words any more credence than a ‘read your fortune’ slip of paper from a “Guess Your Weight” machine.

He’s a fraud.


14 posted on 04/28/2009 1:24:23 PM PDT by mkjessup (You're either with our Constitution, or you are with TKU ("The Kenyan Usurper"). CHOOSE!!!)
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To: Alex Murphy

He’s quite entertaining to listen to, in sort of a creepy way. Listening to him is just like listening to the TV preachers in the 80’s preaching the “Blab It And Grab It” theology. Joel’s no different.

Hellfire and damnation (personal responsibility and consequences) would never go down well in this guys church.


15 posted on 04/28/2009 1:27:06 PM PDT by Habibi ("We gladly feast on those who would subdue us". Not just pretty words........)
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To: Alex Murphy

He's about like Finney.

16 posted on 04/28/2009 1:29:45 PM PDT by fishtank (The denial of original sin is the root of liberalism.)
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To: ArmyBratproud
In short, read your bible, stop talking in tounges, be a man, and then maybe, just maybe, your wife will stop knocking boots with the pool boy.

Sounds like you're speaking from personal experience.
17 posted on 04/28/2009 1:31:19 PM PDT by mkjessup (You're either with our Constitution, or you are with TKU ("The Kenyan Usurper"). CHOOSE!!!)
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To: Alex Murphy

Envy?


18 posted on 04/28/2009 1:34:30 PM PDT by gedeon3
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To: ArmyBratproud
. . .and then maybe, just maybe, your wife will stop knocking boots with the pool boy.

Uh. . .what?

19 posted on 04/28/2009 1:34:50 PM PDT by MEGoody (Ye shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free.)
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To: CaptainMorgantown

I’ve noticed pastors now getting into spiritual financial counseling. Definitely looks like a “for profit” venture and cause for concern.


20 posted on 04/28/2009 1:37:34 PM PDT by baltoga
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