Special Thu column ping
This is not your fathers welfare state
By Howie Carr | Thursday, May 7, 2009 | http://www.bostonherald.com | Columnists
And here I always thought Welfare Cadillac was just a stupid novelty song from 1970.
Now it turns out Guy Drakes tune is another state entitlement here in Massachusetts, compliments of the Department of Transitional Assistance, formerly known as welfare.
In Gov. Deval Patricks Massachusetts, if youre on the dole, you may be eligible to get a free car. So much for the budget Armageddon they keep talking about at the State House.
Let the taxpayers worry about those billion-dollar deficits. If youre on welfare, come on down!
Nice enough that the layabouts get a free car - plus the state picks up the tab for insurance, excise tax, title, registration, inspection, and approved repairs. The absolute frosting on the cake is a free AAA membership.
Please, try not to let this newest handout destroy your faith in the truth of the budget crisis. Youre just angry because you cant afford AAA. But your average welfare leech needs guaranteed road service a lot more than you do.
Dont you hate it when youre fleeing a department store after utilizing the five-finger discount, and the store security and the mall cops are in hot pursuit, and you jump in your Coupe DeVille and it wont start. Damn!
Of course the gimme girls and gals need Triple-A for their welfare Cadillacs. (And yes, I understand theyre not really Cadillacs. Only the governor gets a Caddy on the arm.) You cant expect a body to walk to the packy for their nightly supply of forties, can you?
Supposedly, these free welfare cars will enable the non-taxpayer to get a job. If they lose the job, the state comes down hard on them -we the taxpayers will not reimburse the cost of insurance after the first six months. If the client quits work or is laid off during the first 12 months, all transportation benefits end, but the client will still keep the car.
But, but . . . what about the Triple-A? Thats an entitlement, you know. Has anybody got a phone number for the ACLU?
A lot of snotty people at the Boston Globe are going to be unemployed very shortly. Finally, a ray of hope for the bow-tied bumkissers. Maybe they, too, will be eligible for a welfare Cadillac.
Cut to the final stanzas of Guy Drakes immortal tune. Hes singing about this new president and his whole new poverty plan.
Why, he gonna send us poor folks money/They say we gonna get it out here in stacks./In fact my wifes already shopping around/For her new Cadillac.
Guy Drake - not just a country-music hack anymore. He was a prophet.
Article URL: http://www.bostonherald.com/news/columnists/view.bg?articleid=1170618
Did this start under Deval? With his blessing? Or does welfare just have so much money they have to find things to spend it on? Just curious . . .