Posted on 08/26/2009 7:37:38 AM PDT by Lockbox
..You might be a Kennedy.
Plagiarizing Jeff Foxworthys You might be a redneckroutine, I think we should have a You might be a Kennedylist.
1. If you every drove a car off a bridge You might be a Kennedy.
2. If you were married for 12 years, had two children and got the marriage annulled You might be a Kennedy.
3. If you and Chris Dodd made waitress sandwiches You might be a Kennedy.
4. If you ever cheating on a test and were expelled Harvard You might be a Kennedy.
5. If you ever said "Do we operate under a system of equal justice under law? Or is there one system for the average citizen and another for the high and mighty?" You might be a Kennedy.
6. If you ever had an affair with the familys 14 year old babysitter You might be a Kennedy.
7. If your brothers' both had an affair with Marilyn Monroe You might be a Kennedy.
Please feel free to add other examples of
You might be a Kennedy.
.....7. If your brothers’ both had an affair with Marilyn Monroe......
Did Martin Luther King Jr have any brothers?
I am writing a book on the kennedy clan.
Its called: The Bootleggers Sons
Ted Kennedy was once asked what he would say to Mary Jo Kopechne’s parents if he met them in the afterlife....He said he’d cross that bridge when he gets to it.....
If you commit rape and get away with it.....you might be a Kennedy.
If you bludgeon someone with a golf club........you might be Kennedy
~ If you're accused of rape, and you defend yourself by saying, "At least Uncle Teddy didn't offer to drive you home...."
~ If your gorgeous, classy, refined wife had to marry a Greek sailor to find true happiness...
WHAT YOU SAY!!1!
lol!
I read this book before going to the Vineyard about 20 years ago.
The guy got away with murder. Period.
If you ever gave your daughter a botched lobotomy while your wife was away You might be a Kennedy.
Finally....a thread appropriate to the occasion...
The Last of The Kennedy Dynasty
As soon as his cancer was detected, I noticed the immediate attempt at the “canonization” of old Teddy Kennedy by the mainstream media. They are saying what a “great American” he is. I say, let’s get a couple things clear & not twist the facts to change the real history.
1. He was caught cheating at Harvard when he attended it. He was expelled twice, once for cheating on a test, and once for paying a classmate to cheat for him.
2. While expelled, Kennedy enlisted in the Army, but mistakenly signed up for four years instead of two. Oops! The man can’t count to four! His father, Joseph P. Kennedy, former U.S. Ambassador to England (a step up from bootlegging liquor into the US from Canada during prohibition), pulled the necessary strings to have his enlistment shortened to two years, and to ensure that he served in Europe, not Korea , where a war was raging. No preferential treatment for him! (like he charged that President Bush received).
3. Kennedy was assigned to Paris , never advanced beyond the rank of Private, and returned to Harvard upon being discharged.. Imagine a person of his “education” NEVER advancing past the rank of Private!
4. While attending law school at the University of Virginia , he was cited for reckless driving four times, including once when he was clocked driving 90 miles per hour in a residential neighborhood with his headlights off after dark. Yet his Virginia driver’s license was never revoked. Coincidentally, he passed the bar exam in 1959. Amazing!
5.. In 1964, he was seriously injured in a plane crash, and hospitalized for several months. Test results done by the hospital at the time he was admitted had shown he was legally intoxicated. The results of those tests remained a “state secret” until in the 1980’s when the report was unsealed. Didn’t hear about that from the unbiased media, did we?
6. On July 19, 1969, Kennedy attended a party on Chappaquiddick Island in Massachusetts . At about 11:00 PM, he borrowed his chauffeur’s keys to his Oldsmobile limousine, and offered to give a ride home to Mary Jo Kopechne, a campaign worker. Leaving the island via an unlit bridge with no guard rail, Kennedy steered the car off the bridge, flipped, and into Poucha Pond.
7. He swam to shore and walked back to the party, passing several houses and a fire station. Two friends then returned with him to the scene of the accident. According to their later testimony, they told him what he already knew - that he was required by law to immediately report the accident to the authorities. Instead Kennedy made his way to his hotel, called his lawyer, and went to sleep. Kennedy called the police the next morning and by then the wreck had already been discovered. Before dying, Kopechne had scratched at the upholstered floor above her head in the upside-down car.
The Kennedy family began “calling in favors”, ensuring that any inquiry would be contained. Her corpse was whisked out-of-state to her family, before an autopsy could be conducted. Further details are uncertain, but after the accident Kennedy says he repeatedly dove under the water trying to rescue Kopechne and he didn’t call police because he was in a state of shock. It is widely assumed Kennedy was drunk, and he held off calling police in hopes that his family could fix the problem overnight. Since the accident, Kennedy’s “political enemies” have referred to him as the distinguished Senator from Chappaquiddick. He pled guilty to leaving the scene of an accident, and was given a SUSPENDED SENTENCE OF TWO MONTHS. Kopechne’s family received a small payout from the Kennedy’s insurance policy, and never sued. There was later an effort to have her body exhumed and autopsied, but her family successfully fought against this in court, and Kennedy’s family paid their attorney’s bills... a “token of friendship”?
8. Kennedy has held his Senate seat for more than forty years, but considering his longevity, his accomplishments seem scant. He authored or argued for legislation that ensured a variety of civil rights, increased the minimum wage in 1981, made access to health care easier for the indigent, and funded Meals on Wheels for fixed-income seniors and is widely held as the “standard-bearer for liberalism”. In his very first Senate roll, he was the floor manager for the bill that turned U.S. immigration policy upside down and opened the floodgate for immigrants from third world countries.
9. Since that time, he has been the prime instigator and author of every expansion of an increase in immigration, up to and including the latest attempt to grant amnesty to illegal aliens. Not to mention the pious grilling he gave the last two Supreme Court nominees, as if he was the standard bearer for the nation in matters of “what’s right”. What a pompous ass!
10. He is known around Washington as a public drunk, loud, boisterous and very disrespectful to ladies. JERK is a better description than “great American”. “A blonde in every pond” is his motto.
Let’s not allow the spin doctors make this jerk a hero — how quickly the American public forgets what his real legacy is. Let’s keep this going for truth, justice and the American way!
If you were ever given a medal for allowing your boat to become an enemy speed bump, you might be a kennedy.
If your daddy was a rum runner during prohibition ..... you might be a Kennedy.
If you kill a young woman, and cry “poor me” ..., you might be a Kennedy.
If the MSM covers for you when you leave a young woman suffocating under water ....., you might be a Kennedy.
If you got to the Pearly Gates just in time to make Bernie Madoff not look so bad............you might be a Kennedy.
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