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Backhoe has lost his best friend and wife of 26 years. (Sad News #454: backhoe has passed away)
Free Dominion and Free Republic ^ | June 17, 2010 | fanfan

Posted on 06/17/2010 4:30:39 AM PDT by fanfan

Our Dear Backhoe, lost his wife, Miss. Emily suddenly early Monday morning.

The Source URL will take you to the thread he posted on FRee Dominion (Our sister site in Canada), and this link takes you to his announcement here on FR.

http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/chat/833678/posts?page=12455#12455

Most of you know that Backhoe maintains the thread "DUBOB 11- more tales from the Dark UnderBelly Of the Beast...", and since his post was made there, very few have seen it.

Our good FRiend could really use our support, so please post all replies to Backhoe.

He is busy with funeral arrangements, so may not post much, or at all, but he will read it, and appreciate the love and support.

Thank you, fanfan.


TOPICS: Announcements; Free Republic; Miscellaneous
KEYWORDS: backhoe; rip
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To: fanfan; All

“Letters to Miss Emily...”
http://www.freedominion.com.pa/phpBB2/viewtopic.php?t=132803


401 posted on 07/11/2010 3:35:29 AM PDT by backhoe (Just an Old Keyboard Cowboy, ridin' the trakball into the Twilight...)
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To: backhoe

Oh, Backhoe, that is beautiful.

I’m so glad you are talking to her like that...it can only help.

For as long as you are “stuck on this old ball of dirt” with out her.

:-)

*HUGS*


402 posted on 07/11/2010 12:15:08 PM PDT by fanfan (Why did they bury Barry's past?)
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To: backhoe

I have started reading this one also, appreciate your openness. Deep sigh. So sorry.


403 posted on 07/11/2010 12:24:51 PM PDT by Joya (Lord Jesus Christ, Son of God, Savior, have mercy on me, a sinner!)
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To: Joya; fanfan

Thank you both.


404 posted on 07/12/2010 3:30:30 PM PDT by backhoe (Just an Old Keyboard Cowboy, ridin' the trakball into the Twilight...)
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To: backhoe

Sheesh, backhoe...I’m just now finding out about your loss...thanks to your post...here...

http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/2551445/posts

condolences

love


405 posted on 07/16/2010 3:33:12 AM PDT by PGalt
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To: backhoe

Hang in there, backhoe. We need your company.


406 posted on 07/16/2010 3:37:39 AM PDT by piasa (Attitude adjustments offered here free of charge)
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To: PGalt

Many thanks for your kind wishes.


407 posted on 07/16/2010 4:33:30 AM PDT by backhoe (Just an Old Keyboard Cowboy, ridin' the trakball into the Twilight...)
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To: piasa

I’m hanging on ( so far ) but I really can’t say I’m liking this much.


408 posted on 07/16/2010 4:34:27 AM PDT by backhoe (Just an Old Keyboard Cowboy, ridin' the trakball into the Twilight...)
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To: backhoe

Thanks for sharing, backhoe...all the links, pictures, memories, etc., (I just finished the entire thread). I miss Emily and I never knew her before today :).

love


409 posted on 07/16/2010 4:57:54 AM PDT by PGalt
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To: backhoe; KC Burke

I so rarely check mail here but had a feeling I should this morning ... thank you for the heads-up.

Backhoe, I’m so sorry. It’s a conceit to pretend I’d rather never have to go through what you’re going through than actually live alone but I’m sure that’s not true. I am happy for Miss Emily — I know you must have so many wonderful memories of your lives together — but I’m heartbroken for you and will keep you in my prayers. You’re such a grace to so many. Stay strong.


410 posted on 07/17/2010 8:36:09 AM PDT by Askel5 († Truth suffers, but never dies -- Teresa of Avila †)
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To: PGalt
Thanks for sharing, backhoe...all the links, pictures, memories, etc., (I just finished the entire thread). I miss Emily and I never knew her before today :). love

Thank you, FRiend- a long time ago, I wrote about that first wife I buried:

"Her Song was Full

And though it's Still

I loved her well,

I always will..."

It applies as much and more ( because we had so much more time together ) to Miss Emily.

Faults? She-- and Miss Helen, had a million, like any Fallen Angel...

Goodness? In spades...

I know I have been very lucky, and very blessed- it's just hard to see it thru the tears.

goodnite, my babies
wherever you might be
johnny loves you

...still...

411 posted on 07/18/2010 12:26:38 AM PDT by backhoe (Just an Old Keyboard Cowboy, ridin' the trakball into the Twilight...)
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To: Askel5
I so rarely check mail here but had a feeling I should this morning ... thank you for the heads-up. Backhoe, I’m so sorry. It’s a conceit to pretend I’d rather never have to go through what you’re going through than actually live alone but I’m sure that’s not true. I am happy for Miss Emily — I know you must have so many wonderful memories of your lives together — but I’m heartbroken for you and will keep you in my prayers. You’re such a grace to so many. Stay strong.

Thank you, old FRiend from the Bloodhound days...
( I was just an aggregator of links back then- you and Budge and Clive and others whose names escape me now did the heavy lifting...)

Like I wrote on Free Dominion, "Mostly, I'm OK- except when I'm not..."

She had so much more to give- to the World, and to me-- but I guess the Master Coder, or the First Cause, or the Good Lord Himself had other plans.

I guess I'll find an answer when I cross that Great Divide between life & death and see for myself...

Until then, prayers are appreciated- I really don't know what to do, without her by my side.

412 posted on 07/18/2010 12:36:26 AM PDT by backhoe (Just an Old Keyboard Cowboy, ridin' the trakball into the Twilight...)
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To: backhoe; fanfan

Oh dear, I am thunderstruck and oh so sorry and saddened for you. Dearest backhoe, I’m just now learning of your sweet Miss Emmy’s passing.

I had no idea, until saw your posting on the comments page just a moment ago. Nobody told me and I was away when our Lord called her home.

(((Backhoe))) I’ll keep you in my prayers and you know that your cherished Emily loves her Johnny as much as you love her.

HUGs and prayers, my longtime FRiend.


413 posted on 07/18/2010 12:41:56 AM PDT by onyx (Sarah/Michele 2012)
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To: onyx
HUGs and prayers, my longtime FRiend.

I thank you, from the bottom of my black little heart.

Her "babies"-- the nearly seventeen year old Old Goat we got when her Mom died, and Cole, her Golden Boy, sleep by my feet...

The dishwasher runs...

And johnny?

still loves you, emmy...

414 posted on 07/18/2010 2:25:14 AM PDT by backhoe (Just an Old Keyboard Cowboy, ridin' the trakball into the Twilight...)
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To: onyx; backhoe

I’m sorry you didn’t know, Onyx. :-(

Backhoe posted a lovely thread on Free Dominion called “Letters to Miss. Emily.”

I’m sure he’d be happy to give you the link. (I’m not sure exactly where it is in this thread.)

You holding up OK Backhoe?
*HUGS*


415 posted on 07/18/2010 1:50:37 PM PDT by fanfan (Why did they bury Barry's past?)
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To: fanfan; backhoe

I found the thread and link on my own.
Tears and prayers and the emptiness and helplessness in knowing there’s nothing I can do to help ease John’s sorrow. I’ll pray and hug you online, dear FRiend (((John))).


416 posted on 07/18/2010 2:08:11 PM PDT by onyx (Sarah/Michele 2012)
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To: onyx; fanfan

Thank you both. I will keep both posts there going as long as I have something to add. It’s a strange journey.


417 posted on 07/18/2010 3:38:13 PM PDT by backhoe (Just an Old Keyboard Cowboy, ridin' the trakball into the Twilight...)
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To: backhoe; All

Sunday night thoughts of backhoe, Miss Helen, Miss Emily.

Thanks backhoe for sharing...for allowing us to catch a glimpse of these wonderful women and the man that loves them.

love

life


418 posted on 07/18/2010 6:44:18 PM PDT by PGalt
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To: PGalt
Sunday night thoughts of backhoe, Miss Helen, Miss Emily. Thanks backhoe for sharing...for allowing us to catch a glimpse of these wonderful women and the man that loves them. love life

The price of love is always tears- why that is, I will never know, until I cross that Great Divide between life and death, and stand before the One who made it all, and ask Him one simple question,

"Why?"

Both of those wives of mine-- Hellion the fiery, Emily the calm and talented-- had a million faults, like any Fallen Angel.

But their hearts were good, most of the time.

Why their hearts were stilled?

I really want to know...

johnny
Sad, and missing them
down here
with them gone, forever, to the Sea...

419 posted on 07/19/2010 1:39:59 AM PDT by backhoe (Just an Old Keyboard Cowboy, ridin' the trakball into the Twilight...)
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To: backhoe

You are welcome. Words fail me. I hope you are as okay as you can be given the givens.

Sigh.


420 posted on 07/19/2010 9:56:44 PM PDT by Joya (Lord Jesus Christ, Son of God, Savior, have mercy on me, a sinner!)
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To: backhoe

You said, ‘I told her, long ago, in reference to something my poor old head has forgotten,

‘“Your Dead are always with you...”

‘And they are- you carry them in your Heart of Hearts, where your secret soul- the very essence of You, that only Giver of Life and a few, rare people know about— resides.

‘Like a faraway Star, they live on as a pinpoint of light. You can see them, still, but no matter how much you crank up the magnification, they remain just a point of light.

‘Oh! So! Far away... visible, but forever distant.’

= = =

http://preview.tinyurl.com/2agomae

= = =
Very well put.

That’s a reality in my life, too.

Good job, backhoe.


421 posted on 07/19/2010 10:11:09 PM PDT by Joya (Lord Jesus Christ, Son of God, Savior, have mercy on me, a sinner!)
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To: Joya

“That’s a reality in my life, too.

Good job, backhoe.”

I wrote this after I lost the first one, but I think it applies to both ( from memory, I may have written it a little differently elsewhere )

My lady smiles at me
far across infinity
from another time
another place
so far
Oh! so very far away

And in my dreams
I see her still
tall and proud
I always will
alight with love
she gave it well
alight with life
she lived it well
her song was full
and tho it’s stilled
I loved her well
I always will


422 posted on 07/20/2010 5:29:55 AM PDT by backhoe (Just an Old Keyboard Cowboy, ridin' the trakball into the Twilight...)
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To: backhoe

Soooo beautiful and soooo true.

You are quite a writer. And a poet.

Thanks.


423 posted on 07/24/2010 8:15:07 PM PDT by Joya (Lord Jesus Christ, Son of God, Savior, have mercy on me, a sinner!)
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To: Joya
Soooo beautiful and soooo true. You are quite a writer. And a poet. Thanks.

Thank you... I appreciated that.

424 posted on 07/27/2010 1:23:05 PM PDT by backhoe (Just an Old Keyboard Cowboy, ridin' the trakball into the Twilight...)
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To: backhoe

You holding up?

*hug*


425 posted on 08/21/2010 12:37:10 PM PDT by fanfan (Why did they bury Barry's past?)
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To: fanfan

“You holding up?”

I’m still standing, and I thank you for asking— I haven’t checked in here, in a while.

Me and The Kids- her two dogs— continue the saga here:

http://www.freedominion.com.pa/phpBB2/viewtopic.php?t=132803
“Letters to Miss Emily...”

And I keep finding more of her “stuff” to post at the original:
http://www.freedominion.com.pa/phpBB2/viewtopic.php?t=132035
“Miss Emily has died”

Never thought I’d outlive two wives.


426 posted on 08/22/2010 2:06:21 AM PDT by backhoe (Just an Old Keyboard Cowboy, ridin' the trakball into the Twilight...)
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To: backhoe

Hey there. I’ll have to read your latest on FD, when I get some time ...


427 posted on 08/26/2010 8:07:37 PM PDT by Joya (Lord Jesus Christ, Son of God, Savior, have mercy on me, a sinner!)
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To: backhoe
Hang in there, buddy. We're here for you.

I think everybody grieves in their own way and in their own time, and sometimes it takes a while to find it.

428 posted on 08/26/2010 8:14:41 PM PDT by tacticalogic
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To: Joya
Hey there. I’ll have to read your latest on FD, when I get some time ...

"Miss Emily has died" is stretching out into 40+ pages, now, it is mostly things she wrote that I keep finding.

"Letters to Miss Emily" continues the adventures of me and "the Kids"- her two dogs...

♪♪ "...and I straighten
Miss Emily's picture
on the wall..." ♪♪


429 posted on 08/27/2010 12:37:46 AM PDT by backhoe (Just an Old Keyboard Cowboy, ridin' the trakball into the Twilight...)
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To: tacticalogic
Hang in there, buddy. We're here for you. I think everybody grieves in their own way and in their own time, and sometimes it takes a while to find it.

I thank you- it's a strange, long journey I find myself on, without my best pal to brace me against the world.

430 posted on 08/27/2010 12:39:49 AM PDT by backhoe (Just an Old Keyboard Cowboy, ridin' the trakball into the Twilight...)
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To: backhoe
I thank you- it's a strange, long journey I find myself on, without my best pal to brace me against the world.

She's still with you. And will be forever.

431 posted on 08/27/2010 1:44:06 AM PDT by okie01 (THE MAINSTREAM MEDIA: Ignorance on Parade)
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To: okie01

I carry her in my heart, until it beats its last.


432 posted on 08/27/2010 11:58:01 AM PDT by backhoe (Just an Old Keyboard Cowboy, ridin' the trakball into the Twilight...)
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To: backhoe

Backhoe, I’ve been thinking about you. Glad to see this thread - well, glad because I can tell you that my heart is sore for your loss and I’ll offer another prayer for you both.


433 posted on 08/27/2010 12:02:07 PM PDT by little jeremiah (Courage is not simply one of the virtues, but the form of every virtue at the testing point.)
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To: backhoe
I carry her in my heart, until it beats its last.

I understand.

And you are in hers. Forever.

434 posted on 08/27/2010 12:36:24 PM PDT by okie01 (THE MAINSTREAM MEDIA: Ignoran>ce on Parade)
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To: little jeremiah

I appreciate that, old FRiend- I can use all the prayers being sent my way.


435 posted on 08/28/2010 3:11:22 PM PDT by backhoe (Just an Old Keyboard Cowboy, ridin' the trakball into the Twilight...)
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To: backhoe

Very Big Hug from me to you (you may remember I am a mrs.)

You are often in my thoughts.


436 posted on 08/28/2010 3:28:20 PM PDT by little jeremiah (Courage is not simply one of the virtues, but the form of every virtue at the testing point.)
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To: little jeremiah
Very Big Hug from me to you (you may remember I am a mrs.) You are often in my thoughts.

Thank you- slap your hub on the butt, in memory
of Miss Emily.

I did a lot wrong, and I did a lot right, in those 25 years that flew by all too fast... but at least, on that night she died, while she was cutting up that watermelon she would never live to eat, I patted her fanny as I walked by in the kitchen...

You can't do that enough.

437 posted on 08/29/2010 3:00:33 AM PDT by backhoe (Just an Old Keyboard Cowboy, ridin' the trakball into the Twilight...)
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To: All
-"Letters to Miss Emily..."--

Hairs...

It's a small thing in The Great Scheme...

...but I am still plucking Miss Emily's grey, slightly crinkled ( from perms ) hairs off of me...

In the car, in the bed.

On my hands and feet and sleeves. Despite all the vacuuming and dusting and cleaning and beating I've done...

I have errant thoughts- “I could clone her, from the DNA in this...”

But, of course, besides the time ( Flowin' like a river, beckoning me...” ) it would take to grow “her” to adulthood- by then, I'd be dead-- and, she would not have Emily's memories, but her own.

Gone.

Forever.




I just saw this:

http://maggiesfarm.anotherdotcom.com/archives/16219-WHAT-IS-ALPHA.html#comments

WHAT IS ALPHA?


The Alpha course was developed in response to people who wanted to have the opportunity to investigate the claims of the Christian faith. 

Over ten weekly sessions, including a day or weekend away, guests hear the claims of the Christian faith. After the presentation, course attendees have a chance to question what they heard and discuss the validity of the claims. The support of all the major Christian denominations has enabled the Alpha course to spread rapidly around the world. Today, Alpha is run in over 160 countries and has been translated into more than 100 languages. Courses can also be found in many contexts including churches, homes, workplaces, military bases, colleges, schools, and prisons. 

There are many reasons why people enjoy attending the Alpha course. For some it’s the no pressure, non-judgmental atmosphere, others enjoy building relationships with new friends, while others appreciate the chance to discuss deep questions of life that they don’t otherwise get the chance to ask.

WHAT HAPPENS AT ALPHA?


Each Alpha course begins with a meal or refreshments providing a chance to relax and get to know others. There is then a short talk, which looks at a different aspect of the Christian faith each week. This is followed by a time of discussion in small groups of about 10 people. Everyone is welcome to contribute their opinion, ask questions and discuss with the rest of the group.

Alpha courses run in a wide variety of locations and at different times of the day. Courses vary in size, from one small group meeting in a home, to hundreds of people in a larger venue. Some courses are held over morning coffee or during a lunch hour, though most are evening courses, typically lasting 2 hours. Whatever the course size, people tend to remain in the same small groups for the duration of the course so they can get to know each other, continue discussions and deepen friendships.

The whole course usually lasts for 10 weeks, with a day or weekend away about half way through. The emphasis is upon exploration and discovery in a relaxed and informal environment.

The Alpha course consists of a series of talks addressing key issues related to the Christian faith.

TOPICS


Week 1: Who is Jesus?
Week 2: Why did Jesus die?
Week 3: How can we have faith?
Week 4: Why and how do I pray?
Week 5: Why and how should I read the Bible?
Week 6 Full Day: Who is the Holy Spirit? What does the Holy Spirit do? How can I be filled with the Holy Spirit?How can I make the most of the rest of my life?
Week 7: How does God guide us?
Week 8: How can I resist evil?
Week 9: Why & how should we tell others?
Week 10: Does God heal today?

The course curriculum is the book Questions of Life by Nicky Gumbel. Each talk reflects one of the chapters from this book.

Please note: There is no obligation to attend all ten sessions.

WHAT THE PRESS SAYS

The New York Times
"A novel approach to Christian education that has been catching on nationwide."

Madeleine Bunting, The Guardian 
"What Alpha offers, and what is attracting thousands of people, is permission, rare in secular culture, to discuss the big questions - life and death and their meaning.“

The Express London
" Alpha makes Christianity relevant to modern life."

Los Angeles Times
“Alpha helps people navigate through Christianity.”

WHAT PAST GUESTS SAY

Anthony: "I didn’t expect the warm welcome I received, the interesting discussions or the lack of pressure to speak in the small groups that followed. I found that I could express any doubts about Christianity, and that my opinions would be respected. If I had an issue with something, I had a forum to voice it with no need to apologize."

Rebecca: “Our church was offering this course and my husband and I thought it would be a great opportunity for us to share in this spiritual journey. We go to church with our two kids, say our prayers, etc. but something was missing. We wanted to find out what was missing.”

Cynthia: I decided to take the Alpha course because I was unsure what it was I believed. I needed something to fill the empty place in my life. I started attending Alpha to seek answers to those basic questions about my faith and who God was.”



Heather: “I was the typical 20 something who had attended church as a child, but once I became an adult I stopped going. When I returned to church I felt like something was missing in my life. The Alpha course helped me understand more about God.
Posted by Bird Dog in Religion at 11:40 | Comments (12)




It sounds like something the “we” that can never be, again, would have been interested in attending.

That Cursillo we attended- #56? #57?-- back circa 1986 was OK, but IMO separating husbands and wives was a major flaw- how were you supposed to grow, together?

We were a team.

The team is no more.

Time to rise, on hurting feet...

Turn on the water heater for a shower and shave...

And start another day...

“By the Shores

of Babylon

We wept for Thee,

Oh! Zion...”

Photobucket

♪♪ "...and I straighten
Miss Emily's picture
on the wall..." ♪♪

-30-
438 posted on 01/17/2011 3:07:59 AM PST by backhoe (Just an Old Keyboard Cowboy, ridin' the trakball into the Twilight...)
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To: All

http://www.freedominion.com.pa/phpBB2/viewtopic.php?p=1622954#1622954

I can’t quite lay a finger on it, but some time in the last month or so, I quit shedding tears for my Dead Miss Emily.

I have no doubt that more tears for her will flow in the future- Hell’s Eternal Fire, I still have a few for my Dead Miss Helen, she, gone almost 30 years, my Bunny, my Mate, my business Partner, my Life, my very Other, Female Self— and yet, I have to move on.

You can’t love the chair she sat in, or her car, or her place in the bed— she ( both shes ) is gone, to wherever good people go— whether it’s the oblivion of a snuffed-out candle, or dancing among the stars, I cannot say— and neither can all the preacher-men and Priests and Rabbis and Shamans, for all their learning.

Like I say, “We’ll find out when we get there...”


439 posted on 06/08/2011 5:10:42 AM PDT by backhoe (Just an Old Keyboard Cowboy, ridin' the trakball into the Twilight...)
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To: backhoe

It’s good to see you, Backhoe.


440 posted on 06/08/2011 5:17:47 AM PDT by OwenKellogg (Defund Elmo, TOTUS, and GOTUS)
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To: backhoe

Howdy neighbor. Good to see you.


441 posted on 06/08/2011 5:19:52 AM PDT by Vigilantcitizen (I got a fever and the only prescription is more watermelon trickworm, better known as bass crack.)
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To: backhoe

Prayers to you and your whole family. I am so sorry for your loss. MomwithHope


442 posted on 06/08/2011 5:21:55 AM PDT by MomwithHope (Wake up America we are at war with militant Islam and progressives - 2 fronts.)
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To: OwenKellogg; Vigilantcitizen; MomwithHope

I thank you- “The Kid” and I are carrying on as best we can, here:

http://www.freedominion.com.pa/phpBB2/viewtopic.php?p=1623221#1623221

This last year has really been “A Season in Hell,” but I’m better, now.

Somewhere, in the last month, a great black cloud lifted from my life, and I quit shedding tears for my Dead Miss Emily... she’s gone, really gone.

And I’m left to carry on. So that’s what I will do.


443 posted on 06/09/2011 3:54:19 AM PDT by backhoe (Just an Old Keyboard Cowboy, ridin' the trakball into the Twilight...)
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To: backhoe

Best


444 posted on 06/09/2011 3:57:58 AM PDT by Lando Lincoln (But that's just me.)
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To: All

By the Waters of Babylon,

We wept for Thee, O! Zion

http://www.freedominion.com.pa/phpBB2/viewtopic.php?p=1624439#1624439

“...and I straighten
Miss Emily’s picture
on the wall...”

-30-


445 posted on 06/14/2011 1:50:09 PM PDT by backhoe (Just an Old Keyboard Cowboy, ridin' the trakball into the Twilight...)
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To: All

I reckon I should check back here at my former haunts and give my FReeper friends an executive summary for the year’s end.

The day to day life of Kid Cole & myself continues to be pseudo-blogged here:

http://www.freedominion.com.pa/phpBB2/viewtopic.php?f=1&t=132803

After that terrible black cloud lifted in May I threw my Golden Pal in the car and went to the Island to hunt up the widow of an old friend of mine. They had a store next to one of mine, and when the Mall here burned we all got career changes.

They became Realtors on the Island and he died right before Emily did- fibrosis. Anyway, we talk, I see her some, tend her house & sea of cats when she’s away. Been repairing things neglected since her husband went terminal 2 1/2 years ago- on the water things break down fast.

About a month ago she emailed me “My business needs a Runner ( courier ) once a week- can you do it?” “Standing on my head,” sez I.

It’s a start.

My kindest regards to you all here.


446 posted on 12/16/2011 2:25:19 PM PST by backhoe (Just a Merry-Hearted Keyboard Pirate Boy, plunderin' his way across the InterToobs)
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To: backhoe

Hope you are well.

Merry Christmas.


447 posted on 12/16/2011 2:29:53 PM PST by MileHi ( "It's coming down to patriots vs the politicians." - ovrtaxt)
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To: fanfan

I’m so sorry. Prayers sent for peace and healing.


448 posted on 12/16/2011 2:35:54 PM PST by Interesting Times (WinterSoldier.com. SwiftVets.com. ToSetTheRecordStraight.com.)
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To: backhoe

Prayers FRiend.

I can’t imagine how you feel at this time, your FRiends at FR are praying for you.

Regards
RB<><


449 posted on 12/16/2011 2:38:28 PM PST by Rightly Biased (Do you know how awkward it is to have a political argument with a naked man?)
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To: MileHi
Hope you are well. Merry Christmas.

Thank you.

I am as good as I'm going to be, at this stage in my strange journey near the end of a long life, lived as well as I could live it.

I miss my Dead Girls terribly- Wives & Mom & Aunts & cousins & friends- but they are "gone, forever, to the Sea..."

I will make do with what is left to me.

Merry Christmas.

450 posted on 12/17/2011 1:11:08 AM PST by backhoe (Just a Merry-Hearted Keyboard Pirate Boy, plunderin' his way across the InterToobs)
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