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Suzanne Venker: The War On Men
Fox News ^ | Published November 26, 2012

Posted on 11/30/2012 4:17:23 PM PST by drewh

Believe it or not, modern women want to get married. Trouble is, men don’t.

The so-called dearth of good men (read: marriageable men) has been a hot subject in the media as of late. Much of the coverage has been in response to the fact that for the first time in history, women have become the majority of the U.S. workforce. They’re also getting most of the college degrees. The problem? This new phenomenon has changed the dance between men and women.

Women aren’t women anymore.

To say gender relations have changed dramatically is an understatement. Ever since the sexual revolution, there has been a profound overhaul in the way men and women interact. Men haven’t changed much – they had no revolution that demanded it – but women have changed dramatically.

Now the men have nowhere to go.

What if the dearth of good men, and ongoing battle of the sexes, is – hold on to your seats – women’s fault?

You’ll never hear that in the media. All the articles and books (and television programs, for that matter) put women front and center, while men and children sit in the back seat. But after decades of browbeating the American male, men are tired. Tired of being told there’s something fundamentally wrong with them. Tired of being told that if women aren’t happy, it’s men’s fault.

Contrary to what feminists like Hanna Rosin, author of The End of Men, say, the so-called rise of women has not threatened men. It has pissed them off. Men want to love women, not compete with them. They want to provide for and protect their families – it’s in their DNA. But modern women won’t let them.

(Excerpt) Read more at foxnews.com ...


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To: drewh

The war on ‘masculinity’- not war on ‘men’.

Irresponsible, sissy men like Obama are encouraged.


51 posted on 11/30/2012 6:50:05 PM PST by mrsmith (Dumb sluts: Lifeblood of the Media, Backbone of the Democrat Party!)
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To: Secret Agent Man
that’s debt racked up before the marriage, it isn’t joint debt. the things you have before the marriage, assets and debt, are yours. the things you accumulate during the marriage are joint.

Evidently your definition of marriage doesn't involve a little thing called "commitment."

52 posted on 11/30/2012 7:08:11 PM PST by E. Pluribus Unum (Labor unions are the Communist Party of the USA.)
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To: E. Pluribus Unum

not my definition. almost all states have this as their definition in their state laws concerning marital property.

and it sounds like you are totally great with people arrying to attempt to brden another person with their pre-marriage mountain of debt. that be love to you, but not me.


53 posted on 11/30/2012 7:16:49 PM PST by Secret Agent Man (I can neither confirm or deny that; even if I could, I couldn't - it's classified.)
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To: jusduat

Sweet sentiments.

My wife and I agreed on a certain set of values that we vowed to not deviate from before we were married. One of them was that I would provide for and protect the family. She would stay home with the kids (work from home part time as she could or wanted to). We would not pay for daycare, nannies, etc. Over the years, we have been tested and this value has been pressed. Alas, even in these tough financial times for us, she is home to pick up the kids and we have never had daycare.

We agreed on the “traditional” roles and responsibilities and recognize each others importance and contribution to our union and our family. We joke and laugh often, still. And we get a little silly and carefree when we are alone without the kids. We joke that she married me for my earning potential and I married a trophy-wife ex model (which she was as a teen).

We each get a 50/50 vote on most things. But she agrees I get an extra vote if the overall welfare of the family is at stake. She gets the extra vote if there are decisions about the upbringing of our children, decor of the house, vacations, gifts, schedule, etc.

I put her on a pedestal and treat like a queen. She respects me and takes care of us. She shows me how much she loves me when she leaves honey-do lists and repair orders along with broken nic-nacks on my work bench in my shop. :o)

Very Happily Married,

Tenacious1


54 posted on 11/30/2012 7:18:07 PM PST by Tenacious 1 (The Click-&-Paste Media exists & works in Utopia, riding unicorns & sniffing pixy dust.)
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I think men have made great strides regarding high achieving women. I mean, look at the tens of millions of men who are totally devoted fans of women’s sports.


55 posted on 11/30/2012 7:30:22 PM PST by Enterprise ("Those who can make you believe absurdities can make you commit atrocities." Voltaire)
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To: drewh
It is simple Math

To Keep a Woman one needs Time and Money
Woman = Time * Money
Ben Franklin Taught Time is Money, so
Time = Money
Substituting
Woman = Money * Money
Woman = Money^2
We are Taught however that Money is the Root of all Problems
Money = SQRT (Problems)
Money^2 = Problems
Substitution
Woman = Problems

/sarc sort of...

56 posted on 11/30/2012 7:47:18 PM PST by HangnJudge
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To: drewh

I’m not interested in a woman who wants to compete with me.


57 posted on 11/30/2012 7:58:04 PM PST by Post Toasties (Leftists give insanity a bad name. 0bama: Eight years of failure and fingerpointing.)
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To: Post Toasties

That’s a sign that’s she’s just looking out for #1 and using me.


58 posted on 11/30/2012 7:59:19 PM PST by Post Toasties (Leftists give insanity a bad name. 0bama: Eight years of failure and fingerpointing.)
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To: virgil283
Thanks Dr drewh...Should a man get married ??.. Lets weigh the cost / benefit ratio. Your wife for any reason and at any time can divorce you, kick you out of the house you have paid for, keep you from seeing your kids, take half of your income and even, now get this, take half of the money in you 401K, that you have put in from your job. And a judge will say that's only fair....Hummm ...now let's see.....

That's always on my mind.

59 posted on 11/30/2012 8:06:16 PM PST by Post Toasties (Leftists give insanity a bad name. 0bama: Eight years of failure and fingerpointing.)
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60 posted on 11/30/2012 8:10:40 PM PST by musicman (Until I see the REAL Long Form Vault BC, he's just "PRES__ENT" Obama = Without "ID")
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To: Post Toasties

Add to that that unmarried women are a major 0bama ‘gimme’ consituency, and lifelong bachelorhood looks better all the time.


61 posted on 11/30/2012 8:26:02 PM PST by Post Toasties (Leftists give insanity a bad name. 0bama: Eight years of failure and fingerpointing.)
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To: Post Toasties

Add to that that unmarried women are a major 0bama ‘gimme’ constituency, and lifelong bachelorhood looks better all the time.


62 posted on 11/30/2012 8:26:11 PM PST by Post Toasties (Leftists give insanity a bad name. 0bama: Eight years of failure and fingerpointing.)
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To: drewh

Ms. Venker might want to amend this title. I know lots of men who resolved this issue by dating women outside of North America and Europe.

Those other women enjoy being what we call traditional females and they enjoy the reactions they get from normal guys. To be honest Eastern European women are mostly like this also.

Being outside America is literally another world.


63 posted on 11/30/2012 8:33:44 PM PST by Rembrandt (Part of the 51% who pay Federal taxes)
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To: virgil283

The cost / benefit analysis is a more compelling argument than the one she puts forth regardless of how many books she has written. Add to it the potential for crushing emotional costs of parental alienation where one’s own children are made to hate the dad by the jilted spouse.


64 posted on 11/30/2012 8:46:57 PM PST by bunnie911
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To: E. Pluribus Unum
Just what I want to marry; a $70,000 student loan.

They are Obama's primary constituency, they'll get a bailout on the loans. You'll end up paying whether you marry them or not.

65 posted on 11/30/2012 8:54:08 PM PST by WeatherGuy
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To: drewh

Feminism is about being a victim. The Second Amendment is about not being a victim.


66 posted on 11/30/2012 9:32:40 PM PST by jmacusa (Political correctness is cultural Marxism. I'm not a Marxist.)
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To: virgil283

Financially, marriage is a very dangerous thing for a man.


67 posted on 11/30/2012 9:57:39 PM PST by MCF
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To: Secret Agent Man

‘there are fewer and fewer upsides to marriage for guys nowadays”
That’s the thing, there is no up side to marriage for a man.


68 posted on 11/30/2012 10:09:35 PM PST by MCF
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To: drewh

“Now the men have nowhere to go.”

Sure they do; they can go to “Call of Duty” (or any other video game), they can meet foreign women that have been imported here, or they can go to the bank and spend their money on themselves (the horror!).


69 posted on 11/30/2012 10:13:58 PM PST by kearnyirish2 (Affirmative action is economic war against white males (and therefore white families).)
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To: WorkingClassFilth

“I’m an unreconstructed troglodyte.”

Same here; I’m a Celtic/Huron savage who povides for my family, brushes the snow off my wife’s car (she is allowed to drive) while she sleeps, raises our sons as a father should, and she only gets to work part-time seasonally. Every day she bemoans her fate./s

(I even did diapers - you have to if you want more than one child - and do laundry, cook, etc.)


70 posted on 11/30/2012 10:17:48 PM PST by kearnyirish2 (Affirmative action is economic war against white males (and therefore white families).)
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To: donna

“They hug each other all the time and soon they will hold hands like the Moslems do.”

No, they hug their checkbooks as they retain the liberty to follow work in a political environment where it is almost illegal to educate or hire a man.

Elections (and “cultural shifts”) have consequences.


71 posted on 11/30/2012 10:19:32 PM PST by kearnyirish2 (Affirmative action is economic war against white males (and therefore white families).)
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To: KC_Lion

“But then she also wasn’t raised in this Society”

Mine either; she is an imported (but documented) guest worker from South America, a permanent “resident alien”.


72 posted on 11/30/2012 10:21:14 PM PST by kearnyirish2 (Affirmative action is economic war against white males (and therefore white families).)
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To: taxcontrol

“I’m not sure why that is at the moment. Perhaps a “wave” of baby girls?”

The women are looking to trap a mate; the men are avoding being trapped. It really is that simple. If anything, there won’t be a wave of baby girls; history has shown when money gets tight the baby girls end up in a ditch. In fact, sex-selection abortions will be the reason for the first restrictions we ever see on abortion in the US (India has already done this); if people are going to have one child, it won’t be female.


73 posted on 11/30/2012 10:24:47 PM PST by kearnyirish2 (Affirmative action is economic war against white males (and therefore white families).)
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To: txrefugee

“It is an ugly situation for our society.”

It is the end of our society (in case the recent election didn’t demonstrate that clearly enough).


74 posted on 11/30/2012 10:27:00 PM PST by kearnyirish2 (Affirmative action is economic war against white males (and therefore white families).)
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To: drewh

“Trouble is”

Be more specific; the men are having no trouble with this at all.


75 posted on 11/30/2012 10:28:07 PM PST by kearnyirish2 (Affirmative action is economic war against white males (and therefore white families).)
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To: Scotswife

“if she thinks abortion is a noble right and has a Che Guevara poster....run as fast as you can!”

Yes, few grandparents would celebrate the murder of their grandchildren.


76 posted on 11/30/2012 10:29:38 PM PST by kearnyirish2 (Affirmative action is economic war against white males (and therefore white families).)
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To: MasterGunner01

“Foreign women PREFER American men over their men. Why? Because they understand the traditional male-female roles and find American men a better choice if they can land one.”

For similar reasons, American men prefer foreign women.

“He marries you and his legal rights are ended. He becomes the wife’s or ex-wife’s defacto wage slave for most of his life. God help him if there are kids because they will be used as weapons against him so the enraged ex-wife can keep exacting her vengeance on the schlub.”

Exactly why they don’t marry them anymore.


77 posted on 11/30/2012 10:31:55 PM PST by kearnyirish2 (Affirmative action is economic war against white males (and therefore white families).)
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To: tbw2

“I know young men who want to commit but will not because they do not want to be on the hook for massive amounts of child support or having to give up half of their property to a woman who is not committed.”

Aye, as I read on a T-shirt at the Meadowlands Flea Market (next to Giants Stadium in NJ): “Why get married? Find a nasty b!tch and buy her a house.”


78 posted on 11/30/2012 10:35:03 PM PST by kearnyirish2 (Affirmative action is economic war against white males (and therefore white families).)
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To: Rembrandt

“Those other women enjoy being what we call traditional females and they enjoy the reactions they get from normal guys. To be honest Eastern European women are mostly like this also.”

South American women as well; they love families, and (by default) traditional values.

Viva! (married 16 years)


79 posted on 11/30/2012 10:47:39 PM PST by kearnyirish2 (Affirmative action is economic war against white males (and therefore white families).)
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To: mrsmith

“Irresponsible, sissy men like Obama are encouraged.”

Gotta love these radio commercials for “Total Transformation”, which feature whiney (white) women b!tching about misbehaving sons. No fathers mentioned in the ads, nor are misbehaving daughters.

What boy subjected to the media abuse today would ever marry a female product of the culture that has waged this “war on men”? I don’t have to answer for you; the stats will show you: very few...


80 posted on 11/30/2012 11:03:48 PM PST by kearnyirish2 (Affirmative action is economic war against white males (and therefore white families).)
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To: drewh
I'm sure that everyone has seen (or heard) of the movie “The Stepford Wives”. This potboiler concerns a young couple that move into a community where the wives are all perfect homebodies. The reason: their husbands have killed them and replaced them with android replicas. The story then devolves into whether or not the heroine can escape being whacked and replaced by an android clone of her.

Actually, if science and technology were able to replicate a real Stepford Wife for the guys, I'm betting that American women would find many, many more of the sisterhood really screaming and hollering how men were dumping them for these artificial “women”. When you think of it guys, wouldn't it be great to have a woman with an OFF switch? How about one that would always build you up instead of tearing you down? How about one that could be reprogrammed? How about one that could be upgraded to a newer model? Sales would be overwhelming, I would bet.

81 posted on 12/01/2012 1:13:18 AM PST by MasterGunner01
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To: Secret Agent Man
If you're going to marry somebody, you marry the whole package, unless it's just a pretend marriage.
82 posted on 12/01/2012 7:47:08 AM PST by E. Pluribus Unum (Labor unions are the Communist Party of the USA.)
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To: MasterGunner01
android replicas

Splice the brain DNA of man's best friend into the DNA of a super model and then you'll have something. For women splice the DNA of a cat brain into a metrosexual.

83 posted on 12/01/2012 8:24:58 AM PST by Reeses
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To: E. Pluribus Unum

I don’t know what your deal is arguing with me. I’m just stating that almost all states regard property before the marriage as separate, and that the items and money made after they are married as the joint property that needs to be divided. And if they have a prenup that may affect division as well.

You can say all the platitudes you want, but the courts and the laws are set up this way.

And most people who get divorced do not believe they are in a pretend marriage and did go into the marriage “marrying the whole package”. Most people don’t get married with an ultimate goal of getting divorced.


84 posted on 12/01/2012 11:18:10 AM PST by Secret Agent Man (I can neither confirm or deny that; even if I could, I couldn't - it's classified.)
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To: taxcontrol
Sadly, it's the women (and I am one, that shoulder 100% of the blame for this) who give birth to baby boys and raise them in their own likeness, not in the likeness of genuine men.

If I've heard once, I've heard a million times, "I don't want my son to marry, yet......"

I sure don't hear these mothers of "boys" stating, "I sure don't want my son having sex until marriage!"

What's so awful about doing what God/nature, if you don't believe in Him, has intended you to do.

Having raised daughters, the last thing I ever wanted them to be is someone's "right of passage" to fit in with the changing times and mores.

My daughters grew up to want to be wives and mommies, not someone's live-in "girlfriend,"

Thankfully they have been that but not until two shed themselves (rather their narcissist husbands took off after another girlfriend) and have found and married men, real men not some mother's "momma's boy."

85 posted on 12/01/2012 12:48:13 PM PST by zerosix (Native sunflower)
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To: Secret Agent Man
My point is that when you marry someone with a huge student loan you inherit the burden, whether or not you are legally required to do so. You are totally focused on legalities.

Just because you are not legally required to help your new spouse pay off her loan does not mean that it does not affect you.

She'll be spending time-and-or-money paying off the loan when she could have been contributing to the welfare of your family, either as a stay-at-home mom or a wage earner.

86 posted on 12/01/2012 4:43:12 PM PST by E. Pluribus Unum (Labor unions are the Communist Party of the USA.)
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To: E. Pluribus Unum

and you realize she inherits his huge college and whatever else debts too?

your point is fine for people that don’t get divorced. it’s a moot point for them. but in the real world, which is where we live, where sadly about half of married couples divorce, when people get divorced, there has to be a way to fairly separate assets and debt incurred in the marriage, because it was property and debt acquired during the marriage and belonging to both of them. now that they won’t be together anymore there needs to be a fair system so that neither gets too little assets or too much debt.


87 posted on 12/01/2012 5:55:21 PM PST by Secret Agent Man (I can neither confirm or deny that; even if I could, I couldn't - it's classified.)
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To: kearnyirish2; KC_Lion
“Mine either”

Make that a trifecta. My lady (14 years together and counting) is from Europe. And the one before her was from Europe. Coincidence? No. I recognized the American cultural decent before I could get trapped.

If we did decide to marry, it will not be in the USA; not happening in this lifetime. At this point, I see no reason why things should change, unless it becomes so unbearable here (November 6; (re)elections have consequences) that we leave this country and go to her native land, where I also have ancestral lineage from.

88 posted on 12/01/2012 7:50:09 PM PST by GOPsterinMA (The autopsy will show that this nation committed suicide.)
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To: Secret Agent Man
and you realize she inherits his huge college and whatever else debts too?

We started off with the fact that more women are now going to college than men.

The advantage of not going to college is you work those four years instead of acquiring debt.

College costs have gone up 72% since 2000, while the earnings of a college graduate have declined 15%.

Why would some smart man who realized that a college degree is way overrated these days and worked and saved instead want to marry someone with college debt for a worthless degree?

I fully understand it. I guess since you plan on getting divorced anyway it doesn't matter to you.

89 posted on 12/01/2012 8:09:10 PM PST by E. Pluribus Unum (Labor unions are the Communist Party of the USA.)
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To: MasterGunner01

“What is interesting is that both foreign men and women dislike American women as rude, pushy, overly aggressive, and unpleasant to be around.”

Excellent point! My European girlfriend despises the majority of American women she works with (and in general) for exactly the reasons you laid out.


90 posted on 12/01/2012 8:15:03 PM PST by GOPsterinMA (The autopsy will show that this nation committed suicide.)
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To: Obama_Is_Sabotaging_America

TV shows (and ads) pretty much follow the same pattern these days:

1. The white heterosexual male is a blithering idiot; the pee-on. He’s good for involuntarily funding a society that hates his existence, though.

2. The person in charge is usually a woman or minority or a female minority combo package. The “mom” rules the roost; the “dad” is there to be the butt of jokes and ignored, except when “mom” wants to go buy shoes or the kids want $omething.

3. The token gay character represents the conscience/moral authority (what a f*cking joke) of the situation/show.


91 posted on 12/01/2012 8:23:43 PM PST by GOPsterinMA (The autopsy will show that this nation committed suicide.)
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To: E. Pluribus Unum

i really cannot converse with you about this. you think this is my personal opinion when all i am telling you is statistics and state laws concerning division of marital property, and you somehow twist this into you knowing i am planning on getting divorced.

i can’t help you out, here.


92 posted on 12/02/2012 1:01:45 AM PST by Secret Agent Man (I can neither confirm or deny that; even if I could, I couldn't - it's classified.)
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To: Secret Agent Man
Just because you are not legally required to help your spouse pay her student loan does not mean it does not affect you financially.

My point was, all other things being equal, I'd prefer to marry a woman who didn't have a $70,000 student loan hanging over her head.

It would probably be one of the first things I'd find out if I were really interested.

This is a way that men are retaliating against women for the war on men. I guarantee it. I know I would.

93 posted on 12/02/2012 7:50:51 AM PST by E. Pluribus Unum (Labor unions are the Communist Party of the USA.)
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To: DoughtyOne

Thank you for asking, but I was not at all offended. To the contrary, I really enjoyed your post to me.


94 posted on 12/03/2012 10:14:41 AM PST by MeganC (Our forefathers would be shooting by now.)
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To: MeganC

Thank you MeganC. I appreciate the response.

Take care.

D1


95 posted on 12/03/2012 10:20:12 AM PST by DoughtyOne (Hurricane Sandy..., a week later and over 60 million Americans still didn't have power.)
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To: gotribe

“I think this article is bullshit. Most women I know are pretty balanced, not the feminazis she describes.”

Reminds me of the infamous New Yorker who said that she didn’t understand how Nixon won the 1972 election because everyone she knew voted for McGovern.

In your case I imagine that your perspective is as it is because you live in a rural community where traditional lifestyles predominate or because you’re so inured by the popular culture that you’re unable to comprehend what’s in front of your very eyes. Either way, projecting your life experience as a global norm is just a tad narrow minded. Especially from my point of view where I spent most of my life growing up in a very pro-feminist and anti-male environment.


96 posted on 12/03/2012 10:22:58 AM PST by MeganC (Our forefathers would be shooting by now.)
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To: kearnyirish2; GOPsterinMA
Sorry for the late reply but I finally found a good graphic to go with this topic.


97 posted on 12/14/2012 7:05:09 AM PST by KC_Lion (Build the America you want to live in at your address, and keep looking up.-Sarah Palin)
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To: KC_Lion; kearnyirish2

Well done!

The one on the left looks like Matthew Modine wearing a wig.

The one on the right looks like a sweet piece of candy.

Like I’ve posted on FR many times, my last two “serious” women have been from Europe. Disposable playthings? Americans.


98 posted on 12/14/2012 7:32:40 AM PST by GOPsterinMA (Time to musk up.)
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To: GOPsterinMA
If you don't mind me asking where in Europe were your wives from?

Traditionalist European Women do make better wives. I know this because mine is from Europe too, Leena is from France even though she and her parents are Palestinians.

I can only assume your women were white Europeans.

My Parents are European (by that I mean actually born and raised in Europe) Mother is from the U.K. and Father is a German Jew.

99 posted on 12/14/2012 7:42:01 AM PST by KC_Lion (Build the America you want to live in at your address, and keep looking up.-Sarah Palin)
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To: GOPsterinMA; KC_Lion

Great pics! Thanks

I’ve been married to a Spaniard for 15+ years; since she was born in South America I enter our children on census form as “Hispanic”. This way they’ll be allowed to get a job when they’re older.


100 posted on 12/14/2012 9:33:31 AM PST by kearnyirish2 (Affirmative action is economic war against white males (and therefore white families).)
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