This is exactly what happens. Exactly. I cannot stress how exact this is. The only addition I'd make is "Mommy and her boyfriend then raid the food backpack for what they want and give the kid what is left."
Unfortunately I know too because my ex DIL spends all the really great child support, works parttime in the evening, goes out all night, sleeps all day, goes on vacations w/o the kids, supports worthless guys, all while my grandchildren would go without and are raising themselves.
I buy all of their clothes, I tried giving them money to keep for important stuff but their mother just takes it away, I pretty much buy them everything they need. Thank God for the internet because they live 2000 miles away. I have found out that for local businesses, they will gladly take my credit card if I call ahead and explain what is going on, like for extra-curricular expenses that have to be purchased at a certain store.
I don’t think she’s on drugs, she just drinks too much and is selfish and only thinks about herself. But hey, the courts decided it was in the kids best interest to live with their mother and move across the country even though it was clear in court that she was irresponsible with money when they had a perfectly stable father who was ready and willing to raise them.
She won’t even let my granddaughter drive her car so that she can learn to drive and get her driver’s license.
People say to call CPS but if there isn’t obvious physical abuse they won’t do a thing.