Skip to comments.Oral-sex issue hits middle schools (posted 6/10/2002)
Posted on 06/10/2002 4:35:38 AM PDT by Pern
Isolated incidents of oral sex on campus and talk among middle-school students of the behavior occurring at off-campus parties has alarmed some Fayette County school administrators and parents who plan meetings on the topic.
Physicians, including one who has seen an increase in sexually transmitted diseases among middle school students, and other professionals are promoting frank discussions about oral sex to discourage students from engaging in it. Still, all agree the practice is limited to a small number of students, some of whom do not equate oral sex to intercourse.
Since Beaumont Middle School principal Tom Mowery wrote to parents in December asking them "to be aware of the prevalence of oral sex at off-campus parties at the middle-school level," administrators at one school referred an incident to law enforcement, and administrators at another school, Jessie Clark Middle, called in parents to discuss a situation.
Diane Woods, the district's middle school director, put the topic on the agenda for a future principals meeting. She said she was notified of a report of oral sex occurring between two students on campus at Tates Creek Middle School several weeks ago.
Without releasing specifics, Tates Creek Middle School assistant principal Earl Stivers said the incident was investigated "both by law enforcement and administratively."
Students' remarks have made doctors and parents fear the activity is more widespread.
Dr. Hatim Omar, a University of Kentucky specialist in adolescent medicine, said that just since January, he has treated at least 10 middle school-age students for sexually transmitted diseases they said they had contracted through oral sex. That's up from six cases in 2001 and two each in 1999 and 2000.
Four students, treated for tonsillitis caused by gonorrhea, attributed their conditions to so-called "head parties," Omar said.
Also since January, he has seen students from every middle school in Fayette County who admit that they have engaged in oral sex or attended parties where students have engaged in oral sex.
Parents and administrators are responding. Besides principals addressing the topic, Beaumont PTA president Debbie Boian wants middle school PTA leaders to discuss developing programs at each school to talk to students about risky behavior.
"It's easy to say, 'Oh those kids are just bragging about having oral sex,'" Boian said. "But if there is any truth to it, you should" address the issue.
Nationally, public-health experts report that teen-agers appear to be engaging in high-risk sexual practices without caution and with alarming casualness. Nearly 1 in 10 reports losing his or her virginity before the age of 13, a 15 percent increase since 1997, according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. According to several surveys, as many as half of teens ages 13 to 19 say they have had oral sex. Other communities across the country are grappling with the problem and are instituting policies that require more supervision and education.
Lexington pediatrician Tom Pauly said his patients are asking him about oral sex and telling him they think it's safer than vaginal intercourse.
"It's a new issue," said Bryan Station Middle Counselor Lynette Schmiedeknecht. "It's more part of the culture, more talked about. It seems that in talking with the kids, they don't consider oral sex (to be) sex. They just think it's something they do as an adolescent."
Dealing with incidents directly and speaking bluntly with middle school students is key to helping them understand the ramifications of their decisions, parents and doctors said. Damage to reputations and illnesses are two of the dangers.
"We advise them to abstain," Pauly said. "We talk about medical complications and the psychosocial complications of engaging in oral sex at such a young age."
After Jessie Clark Middle students talked about the popularity of oral sex with an assistant principal this spring, principal Steve Carmichael said: "We invited two moms to come in and shared our concerns. It wasn't a conversation as awkward as you might think. We would rather overreact than underreact."
The issue isn't a routine part of sex education classes, officials said.
Mike Kennedy, acting health education coordinator, said that until 1990, the district had a sex education curriculum. But now, site-based councils at each school are responsible for deciding what kind of sex education is dispensed, he said.
Seven middle schools offer programs that teach abstinence only, Kennedy said. Other schools cover sex education in health classes. But Kennedy said he doesn't think oral sex is discussed anywhere as part of the middle school curriculum.
At Beaumont, principal Mowery said the quick intervention -- writing to parents -- was successful. Parents responded to meetings about how to discuss sexual issues with their children. And as the year progressed, counselors and administrators had fewer kids talking about the parties.
Only a small minority of students have actually had oral sex, Mowery thinks.
"Ninety percent of our kids," he said, "make good decisions in every aspect of their lives."
The Clinton legacy lives, and proliferates.
Now where could all these kids get that impression? I'm sure this is the VRWC's fault.
The only positive thing I can say about this is that they report that in their high school, girls who feel pressured by boyfrieds to go all the way (and who doesn't remember what teenage boys are like) will perform oral sex but refuse intercourse, and that most girls report that works. Apparently the girls (who knows what the boys think) can pretty much emotionally divorce themselves from it in a way they cannot or do not from actual intercourse. Bad as it is, it's better than pregnancies and the emotional effects of early teen intercourse.
Well, it is doing a gay a favor, but as far as "is it sex," I'd say if it's something you wouldn't mind your wife doing for another guy, then it's not sex.
If it *is* something you would mind your wife performing for another man, then, well, you get my drift...
A new twist on moral equivalency, I guess.
I don't envy anyone being parents of teen-agers and younger in this post-Clinton era.
If this is incest, then I'd guess the parents are intimately involved...< grinning, ducking, and running >
Not really a "positive" aspect, either, IMHO.
Apparently the girls (who knows what the boys think) can pretty much emotionally divorce themselves from it in a way they cannot or do not from actual intercourse.
I don't mean to sound cruel, but it sounds like a these girls are gearing up for a certain very old profession.
"The Clinton Legacy Lives On!"Immortal quotes from the American Newsmedia and Prominent Members of the Democrat Party:
"Everybody does it."
"It's just sex"
"Character doesn't count."
Of course I was a teenager. My parents, just like their parents did with them, tried to instill in me that sex is wrong before marriage PERIOD. That's what I am telling my daughter, too. She will know that she doesn't owe these guys anything for "rite of passage".
As far as small and gratuitous, well, like I said, I didn't mean to be cruel and I meant it with all due respect to your thoughts. Innacurate? That's your opinion, but I have known a few prostitutes and that fits to a "T" how they think.
I will pray that your own daughters do "have their heads on straight" about it as I know that peer pressure can be hard.
You have extremely low expectations for your daughters, and are also endangering them. If you really think it's OK to overlook boys' ejaculating in your daughters' mouths (after having made their rounds), then I feel sorry for you (but most especially for your daughers). No one can control what their kids do. But we certainly try to start with the best advice we can give them. Which in this case is, don't get involved with this stuff. Nothing good comes of it. We tell them that they will lead far happier lives if they reserve sexuality for marriage. And believe it or not, I think they understand that. And further, they actually ARE members of church groups (ones that we carefully vet). In these groups, in general, are good, wholesome kids who are trying valiantly to lead good, wholesome lives in the face of a culture which seeks at every step to corrupt them in one way or another (sex, oral sex, drugs, violence, profanity, bullying, etc. etc.). When your daughter comes home with oral gonorrhea, or when five boys come a-calling for servicing, you will have only yourself to blame. Finally, if you are telling your daughter that the way to engage in a relationship with a boy is to service him whenever he wants (which for most boys, would be quite frequently), I guarantee you that she will have NO lack of eager boyfriends. Whether they are the kind of boyfriends you would wish for your daughter, I honestly don't know. They would not be the kind of boys I would want my daughter to befriend.
Granted this may be X42's legacy, but realize he did not invent oral sex, he merely popularized it in the media. Long before I ever heard of Clinton, (spit) oral sex was alive and well, at least in my high school. Back then there were many girls who were saving themselves for marriage (mostly Catholic) who would not be opposed to playing the sloberin blues on the business end of your meat whistle. Go figure.
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