Posted on 10/24/2002 10:17:29 AM PDT by vannrox
University of Smith and Wesson
Ted Kennedy killed more people with his car than I have with my handgun.
Cum catapult proscript erat, tum soli poscript catapultas habebunt.
(If catapults are outlawed, only outlaws will have catapults)
Greenpiece (with a picture of a green handgun)
Body piercing by Smith & Wesson
If Atlatls were outlawed, only outlaws would have Atlatls.
An atlatl is a primitive weapon, a "spear thrower."
I don't have a license to kill. I have a learner's permit.
Honk If You've Never Seen An Uzi Fired From A Car Window
My President is Charlton Heston
If you love something, set it free....if it doesn't come back, hunt it down and kill it!
Fight Crime: Shoot Back!
I'd kill for a Nobel Peace Prize.
If you can't dazzle them with brilliance, riddle them with bullets
Rainy days and automatic weapons always get me down.
Some people are alive only because it's illegal to kill them.
My personal favorite.
Those who live by the sword get shot by those who don't.
WARNING! Driver only carries $20 in ammunition
Why is it called tourist season if we can't shoot at them?
If you can read this, you are in range.
It's easier to child-proof your gun than to bullet-proof your child.
The Second Amendment: The Right to Bear Surface-to- Air Missiles.
An armed society is a polite society.
This is my second favorite.
Notice: Driver only carries $20 in ammunition.
Driver carries less than $20… IN AMMUNITION
Guns don't kill people, postal workers do.
I just got a gun for my wife - good trade.
Support your right to arm bears.
Wear short sleeves! Support your right to bare arms!
I'm Pro-Choice. I choose to - eat meat - hunt -fish - trap- wear fur
I'll eat anything as long as it swims, walks, slithers or flies.
Law of the Old West: Smith and Wesson beats four aces
Keep Honking - I'm Reloading.
American Patriot - #1 Endangered Species
Do You Trust Your Government?
God, Guts and Guns keep America free
Gun Owners Do It With More Bang!
Guns Don't Kill - Taxes Do!
Gun control: simple solutions for simple minds
Gun control means using both hands
Happiness is a belt-fed weapon
Help Criminals - BAN GUNS
I Love Assault Rifles
I Love Assault Weapons
I Love Machine Guns
I still miss my ex-husband, but my aim is getting better
In Guns We Trust - E Pluribus Bang
Invest In America - Buy A Smith & Wesson
It's The Criminals - Stupid
Kill It & Grill It
My Wife? Yes. My Dog? Maybe. My Gun? Never.
Only Crooked Politicians Fear Armed Citizens
Piss Off The liberals - Buy a Gun
Remember Waco
Spotted Owls Taste Great
Stop Gun Control - Because Freedom is a Terrible Thing to Waste
This Car Insured By Smith and Wesson
Will Work For Ammo
Guns Don't Kill - Taxes Do!
I Love My Country - But I Fear My Government
Slaves "R" Us - The New World Order
USSA - United Socialist States of America
USSR - United States Socialist Republic
The Road to Hell is Paved With Democrats
Vote Republican - Operation Restore Sanity
Enlighten a Liberal - Shine a Flashlight Under his Rock
Empty The Prisons, Make Room For Congress
Vote Democrat - It's easier than getting a job
Pro Accordian - AND I VOTE
Once I was young and idealistic. Now I'm a Republican.
I used to have an open mind but my brains kept falling out.
I used to think I was indecisive, but now I'm not sure.
If you think nobody cares about you, try missing a couple of payments.
I do whatever my Rice Krispies tell me
A man with a Gun is a citizen. A man without a Gun is a subject.
A very noteworthy bumper sticker.
Democide - what happens when people are disarmed.
Politicians perfer unarmed peasants
...and we keep adding new ones, as if there weren't enough already!
Click on the stock number to see a picture of that sticker
BS000 - Don't blame me, I didn't vote for his daddy, either!
BS001 - No more draft dodging drug users in the White House!
BS002 - Don't blame me, I didn't vote for that son of a Bush!
BS003 - One person, one vote (Offer not valid in Florida)
BS004 - AMERICA Love it or leave it ALONE
BS005 - United We Stand
BS006 - Falwell and Robertson don't speak for me!
BS008 - Remember Flight 93
BS009 - Extremism in defense of religion is no virtue.
BS010 - USAPATRIOT One nation - One God - One President Sieg heil! Sieg heil! Sieg heil!
BS041 - Running Microsoft? What do you want to fix today?
BS100 - Support Capitol Punishment, Flog a Politician Today
BS101 - Legalizing Concealed Weapons would be just fine if stupidity was outlawed
BS102 - We're the largest street gang in America. We're the POLICE
BS103 - [Windows™ logo] ...and this is your computer on drugs. Any questions?
BS104 - Annoy a politician today - THINK
BS105 - Anime-niac
BS106 - There is no freedom OF religion without freedom FROM religion
BS107 - The more I learn about terrorism, the better I understand the phone company
BS108 - C code. C code run. Run, code, run! (please?)
BS109 - The Klingon Prime Directive: [tiHoH in Klingon font] Kill Them!
BS110 - Bad cop. Bad BAD cop. NO DONUT.
BS111 - If you drink, don't park. Accidents cause people!
BS112 - Support the 28th Amendment: Convicted felons shall not have the right to demand or expect better treatment or conditions than the members of the public at large.
BS113 - CAUTION! Trigger-happy Klingon on Tactical!
BS114 - My job drives me to drink. If it wasn't for that, I'D QUIT!
BS115 - If you can read this, I can hit my brakes and sue you!
BS116 - Information Superhighway Official Roadkill
BS117 - Grad School - It's not just a job, it's an indenture!
BS118 - Flush Rush
BS119 - If ignorance is Bliss, Washington must be Paradise!
BS120 - I know that you have a thing for me, but why is it so small and deformed?
BS121 - Do Not Underestimate the Power of the Chocolate Side of the Force!
BS122 - Save the whales! Trade them for valuable prizes!
BS123 - Nice front bumper you've got there. Shame if something happened to it....
BS124 - "Gun Control" isn't about guns. It's about control.
BS125 - A cat, by any other name, is still a sneaky little furball that barfs on the furniture
BS127 - Another Deadline, Another Miracle
BS128 - Militant Agnostic. I don't know, and you don't either!
BS129 - Blessed be the censors, for they shall truly inhibit the earth
BS130 - Censorship? We don't have any censorship. If we did, I couldn't say XXXX or XXXX..
BS131 - XXXXXX the censors!
BS132 - He who hesitates IS LUNCH!
BS133 - Creature of the Night
BS134 - The truth is out there. Trust no one. Deny everything.
BS135 - Death Before Dishonor Nothing Before Coffee
BS136 - Friends don't let friends boot OS/2™.
BS137 - [Windows™ logo] I Don't Do Windows
BS138 - Vegetables aren't food. Vegetables are what food eats.
BS139 - Balance the Budget. Declare Politicians as Game and sell Hunting Stamps.
BS140 - Agnus Deae (Lamb of Goddess)
BS141 - Crus de agnus Deae con quilon menthae (Leg of lamb of Goddess with mint jelly)
BS142 - Crus de agnus Dei con quilon menthae (Leg of lamb of God with mint jelly)
BS143 - My kid and your taxes go to Starfleet Academy
BS144 - We are IBM™! Windows™ is IRRELEVANT! You will be ASSIMILATED!
BS145 - RTFM
BS146 - Nuke an unborn gay baby whale for Jesus
BS147 - Campus Crusade for Cthulhu: It Found Me!
BS148 - The Cat Philosophy of Life: If you can't Eat it or Shred it, then Sleep on it.
BS149 - Welcome to Middle Earth. NOW GO HOME.
BS150 - Will litigate for food
BS151 - The way to a man's heart is between the fourth and fifth ribs
BS152 - Klingon Empire Survey Vehicle
BS153 - Dyselxics have more fnu
BS155 - So many men, so little reason to sleep with any of them
BS156 - Happiness is the planet Earth in your rear-view mirror
BS157 - Be nice to me, or I just might develop psychokinetic powers and destroy Tokyo!
BS159 - When Cthulhu Calls, he calls 1-800-Collect™
BS160 - How long do I have to be a grad student before I can petition for tenure?
BS161 - Bad command. Bad, BAD command. Sit! Stay!
BS162 - The meek shall inherit the Earth. The rest of us are going to the stars!
BS163 - Dead men tell no tales... unless you're in forensics
BS164 - Next year, why not vacation in the millions of worlds of a used book store?
BS165 - Carpe DM: Seize the Dungeon Master
BS166 - Happy Happy Kill Kill
BS167 - I didn't do it. You can't prove it. Nobody saw me. The sheep are lying!
BS168 - I have seen the truth, and it makes no sense!
BS169 - The Few. The Browed. The Klingon Marines.
BS170 - To err is human. To forgive is against company policy.
BS171 - Remember when Windows were washed, mice were trapped, and UNIX guarded the harem?
BS172 - Once you pull the pin from Mr. Grenade, he is no longer your friend.
BS173 - 1.8 x 1012 furlongs per fortnight. 'Tis a good Idea, and it doth be the Law.
BS174 - If men could get pregnant, abortion would be a sacrament!
BS175 - Always forgive your enemies. Nothing annoys them more!
BS176 - I don't need a new religion. I haven't used up the Old one.
BS177 - Never trust a smiling GM!
BS178 - Why get real? Plastic is cheaper, It doesn't rot, It comes in prettier colors, and it's much easier to clean!
BS179 - Will build thermonuclear devices for food
BS180 - Do Not Meddle in the Affairs of Dragons, for You are Crunchy and Good with Ketchup.
BS181 - Those who can, Teach. Those who cannot teach ARE RUNNING THE SCHOOLS!
BS182 - Weird Enough for Government Work
BS183 - If I could get a firm grip on reality, I'd choke it!
BS184 - Unicorns aren't mythical... virgins are!
BS185 - I love cats. Want to trade recipes?
BS186 - Cats make more sense than men
BS187 - Cats make more sense than women
BS188 - Men exist because cats won't mow the lawn. Women exist because sheep can't cook. Neither of these things explain children.
BS189 - Abolish mornings!
BS190 - Jesus, protect me from your followers!
BS191 - Jesus is coming! LOOK BUSY
BS192 - She said "Harder!" I did that. She said "Faster!" I did that. She said "Deeper!" I philosophized.
BS193 - Am I supposed to be impressed?
BS194 - I love my country. It's my government I fear.
BS195 - Why should we trust the government with automatic weapons?
BS196 - My wife keeps complaining that I never listen to her... or something like that.
BS197 - Where there's a whip, there's a way
BS198 - My cat dislikes the term "pet." It prefers "friend and confidante."
BS199 - If guns cause crime, matches cause arson!
BS200 - Caution Vampire in trunk!
BS201 - If it isn't fattening, it isn't food!
BS202 - [pentagram] Born Again Pagan
BS203 - Just say NO! To sex with pro-lifers
BS204 - The real problem with Baptists is that they never quite seem to hold them under long enough.
BS205 - Jesus Saves by shopping wisely and using double coupons
BS206 - I am suffering from a Sexually Transmitted Disease: Children!
BS207 - I want to be Barbie™-- The bitch has everything!
BS208 - Cats don't want to own people. They prefer to lease with an option.
BS209 - Drive defensively. Buy a tank.
BS210 - Don't steal. The government hates competition.
BS211 - Fundamentalism means never having to open your mind
BS212 - Computers are vehicles for the mind. They drive you crazy!
BS213 - Stop the violins. Visualize whirled peas.
BS214 - We are Microsoft! Resistance is Futile! You will be assimilated!
BS215 - Visualize Whirled Peas
BS216 - My kid swindled your honor student at the Ferengi College of Business, where students learn to profit from more than just mistakes.
BS217 - My other vehicle was assimilated by the Borg!
BS218 - [Alien face] Nice little planet you've got here. Shame if something happened to it.
BS219 - Cats keep their claws sharp because they know that just a purr may not be enough
BS220 - Anything not nailed down is a cat toy!
BS221 - Artificial Intelligence is no match for Natural Stupidity
BS222 - A chill in the air, a cat on the lap, a mug of chocolate, and a good book. Ah, Paradise!
BS223 - I think, therefore I am dangerous
BS224 - Usenet Cheaper than drugs, just as addictive, but you have to know how to read!
BS225 - It's worse than you think and they ARE out to get you!
BS226 - Trust me I'm a lawyer [picture of shark ]
BS227 - You found God? If nobody claims him in 30 days, he's yours!
BS228 - You're pro-life? That's fine. Now get one and stay out of mine!
BS229 - [bear with rifle] Support the right to keep and arm bears!
BS230 - Who needs drugs? I go broke buying books!
BS231 - Weird Load
BS232 - [pentagram] Give me that REAL Old-Time Religion!
BS233 - Book lovers never go to bed alone!
BS234 - MY MIND IS NOT FOR SALE OR RENT TO ANY GOD OR GOVERNMENT
BS235 - Grow your own dope! Plant a politician!
BS236 - Pro-Free Speech. Pro-Gun. Pro-Choice. PRO-FREEDOM!
BS237 - Sure you can trust the Government! Just ask an Indian!
BS238 - Is it too late to get the Russians to nuke Washington?
BS239 - Never shoot to kill. Always shoot to live.
BS240 - [fish with legs] You keep believing... we'll keep evolving!
BS241 - Procrastinate Later
BS242 - My ship finally came in, but it was the Kobayashi Maru!
BS243 - Alcohol and calculus don't mix NEVER DRINK AND DERIVE!
BS244 - An angry Dragon may eat you, but an angry Woman is truly dangerous
BS245 - My ex gave me a reason to live -- I want Revenge!
BS246 - Subvert the dominant paradigm!
BS247 - I'm not nearly as think as you confused I am!
BS248 - Don't hate yourself in the morning -- Sleep till noon!
BS249 - Summa cum laude graduate, Darth Vader School of Personnel Management
BS250 - Practice Safe Housing - Use Condos
BS251 - Some mornings I just don't feel like slaying dragons
BS252 - Closet Extrovert
BS253 - Babylon Express - When you absolutely positively don't want anyone to know where it went or how it got there.
BS254 - I found Jesus. He was in my trunk when I got back from Tijuana.
BS255 - Real Men love Jesus. He looks fantastic in a miniskirt
BS256 - VOTE: REPUBLICAN, it's easier than THINKING; DEMOCRAT, it's easier than WORKING; Libertarian, it's cheaper than TAXES
BS257 - If we are what we eat, I'm fast, cheap and easy!
BS258 - I don't deserve self esteem
BS259 - It's a control freak thing. I won't let you understand!
BS260 - System analysis is the process of finding exactly the right wrench to pound in the required screw
BS261 - Proudly marching to the beat of a different kettle of fish
BS262 - I'm doing my part to piss off the Religious Reich
BS263 - The best things in life aren't things
BS264 - Ignore your rights and they'll go away
BS265 - The "New Right" is fundamentally wrong
BS266 - Pay no attention to the man behind the curtain
BS267 - First they burn books then they burn people
BS268 - Oh, no! I turned out just like my mother!
BS269 - Question Authority before it Questions You!
BS270 - A Woman's Place is in the House... and Senate!
BS271 - Computers aren't intelligent. They just think they are.
BS272 - Civil Disobedience - It's not just for revolutionaries anymore!
BS273 - C:\COFFEE.EXE NOT FOUND <A>bort, <R>etry, <B>rew another pot?
BS274 - Vote Conservative! There's no mistake like an old mistake!
BS275 - Been there. Done that. Went back for more.
BS277 - Computers cut my work in half... and the boss expects me to put it all back together!
BS278 - I feel like a new man. Do you have one I could use?
BS279 - Murphy was an optimixt!
BS280 - Red meat isn't bad for you. Fuzzy, green meat is bad for you!
BS281 - I saw Elvis making crop circles
BS282 - Where are we going? Why am I in this handbasket?
BS283 - Free Speech keeps Rush on the air. Free Thought keeps me from believing him.
BS284 - Power Corrupts - Isn't that what it's for?
BS285 - Real Psychics don't have 1-900 numbers. They call you... collect!
BS286 - Downsizing is good, right? Then let's fire Uncle Sam!
BS287 - No thanks. I gave at the orifice.
BS288 - Hang Up and Drive!
BS289 - I did not escape, I have a day pass!
BS290 - Untie Dexlysics!
BS291 - Some days, it's just not worth gnawing through the straps
BS292 - The problem with religious texts is that the answers aren't in the back, either.
BS293 - The fundies keep telling me I'm going to Hell and they're going to Heaven. If they aren't there, it won't be Hell, so I guess we're all going to the same place!
BS294 - There's a sucker reborn every minute - PT Robertson
BS295 - Listen to Limbaugh? No thanks, my parents weren't related
BS296 - Forget Love - I want to fall in Chocolate
BS297 - Do Not Meddle in the Affairs of Witches... [picture of frog]
BS298 - B.S. (Phys): Why does it work? B.S. (Engr): How does it work? B.A. (Acctg): How much will it cost? B.A. (Arts) You want fries with that?
BS299 - Go Fascinate Someone Else
BS300 - He's YOUR God. They're YOUR rules. YOU burn in Hell!
BS301 - Animal testing is futile! The animals always get nervous and give the wrong answers
BS302 - Four space stations were lost and they still funded a fifth? Only on TV - Babylon 5
BS303 - B-5/DS9 - Boldly going in circles where no TV shows have gone before (this week)
BS304 - Computer Literacy? You mean my computer is supposed to read?
BS305 - The computer revolution is over - the computers won!
BS306 - I inhaled and I vote
BS307 - Help! I've tripped and I can't come down!
BS308 - I was abducted by space aliens and I vote!
BS309 - This vehicle leased to: American Association for the Abolition of Acronym Abuse Regional Group Headquarters Staff Transport Office Pool (AAAAARGH/STOP)
BS310 - Will Write Code for Food
BS311 - I got out of bed for this?
BS312 - EARTH FIRST! We can stripmine the other planets later!
BS313 - This isn't a life it's a forced March!
BS314 - They're Lying
BS315 - Ignore the propaganda. Focus on what you see.
BS316 - Testing drugs on computers just makes them safe for computers.
BS317 - Life would be so much easier if we just had the source code
BS318 - Don't blame me- I'm just visiting this planet!
BS319 - Who are you to question why your god doesn't want me to believe in him?
BS320 - KPLA All Klingon, all the time
BS321 - I am perfectly sane. The little voices in my head told me so!
BS322 - If all the world's a stage, I want better lighting!
BS323 - If you get any closer, you'd better have a condom
BS324 - No job too easy - No fee too large - Dragons Rescued - Virgins Slain
BS325 - You earthlings have such strange eating habits
BS326 - Put politicians in their place - Landfills!
BS327 - I'm disturbed. I'm depressed. I'm inadequate. I've got it all!
BS328 - Visualize Whirled Pizza
BS329 - What we really need is a moment of SCIENCE in the public schools!
BS330 - Hukt on fonix reely wurkt for mee!
BS331 - Some push the envelope, some just lick it, and some can't find the flap!
BS332 - FEED THE HOMELESS TO THE HUNGRY
BS333 - [Dragon] Some things must be believed before they can be seen
BS334 - [Pegacorn] Some things must be believed before they can be seen
BS335 - [UFO] Some things must be believed before they can be seen
BS336 - Stop repeat offenders Don't re-elect them!
BS337 - Fundamentalism stops a thinking mind
BS338 - Remember when conservatives protected privacy and freedom?
BS339 - Bobbitt's Tavern. Have a few too many and we'll cut you off!
BS340 - A world without war; a dream to some, a nightmare to the arms manufacturers.
BS341 - Victims and suspects and clues, oh my!
BS342 - Mystery readers are never clueless (after chapter one)
BS343 - A tisket, a tasket, a victim in a casket
BS344 - The four essential elements: Means, Motive, Opportunity and Chocolate!
BS345 - "When you have eliminated the impossible, whatever remains, however improbable, must be the truth." --S. Holmes
BS346 - Mankind is the result of millions of years of evolution designed to produce a better Cat Servant
BS347 - Cats humor us because they know that their ancestors ate ours.
BS348 - There's no Police like Holmes
BS349 - My husband said he'd leave me if I didn't stop reading mysteries all the time... Why didn't I start sooner?
BS350 - Microsoft™: If you can't beat them, buy them. Apple™: If you can't beat them, sue them. IBM™: If you can't beat them, ignore them.
BS351 - Dogs think men are gods. Cats are not so easily deluded.
BS352 - It's hard to Soar with Dragons when you Work with Gargoyles
BS353 - Bean me up, Scotty! They make lousy coffee down here
BS354 - Some days, the most interesting thing on the TV is a sleeping cat!
BS355 - Yes, I've heard of "decaf." What's your point?
BS356 - Everybody needs something to believe. I believe I'll have another cup of coffee!
BS357 - Just bring me the coffee and nobody will get hurt
BS358 - Are you sure this isn't just a live-action roleplaying game?
BS359 - "Get a life?" I'm a gamer! I have lots of lives!
BS360 - If space is a vacuum, who changes the bag?
BS361 - A chill in the air, a cat on the lap, a mug of java and a good book. Ah paradise!
BS362 - We will never have great leaders as long as we mistake education for intelligence, ambition for ability, and lack of transgression for integrity!
BS363 - Different drummer? I'm my own band!
BS364 - Forget world peace, visualize using your &+%?*$! Turn signals!
BS365 - If a man's best friend is his dog, don't give him your phone number!
BS366 - Federal Espresso - When you absolutely, positively have to have something that will get you going, no matter what you were doing overnight!
BS367 - Only lawyers get to be judges, and that's the (F)LAW!
BS368 - Inside every small problem is a big one trying to get government funding
BS369 - Friends let you hide at their place. Real friends let you hide bodies.
BS370 - Everything I really needed to know, I learned in sniper school
BS371 - Gun Exchange programs would work great if they gave you a gun when you handed in a criminal!
BS372 - Guns didn't make America unsafe, Courts and Congress did!
BS373 - Don't call us "gun nuts"-- with a government like ours, we'd be nuts not to have guns!
BS374 - If you try to get my gun, don't expect to get my trust
BS375 - REAL PROGRAMMERS DON'T DOCUMENT If it was hard to write, it should be impossible to understand!
BS376 - Always remember: Pillage first, THEN burn!
BS377 - My life may be weird, but at least it's not boring!
BS378 - User Surly
BS379 - I am a mallaholic. Please do not give me directions to the nearest shopping mall!
BS380 - I like noise. I need noise. When it's too quiet, I can hear my brain cells dying.
BS381 - Always proofread. You might have something out.
BS382 - It never fails! You start having fun, and they send in the lawyers.
BS383 - If you hold a Unix shell up to your ear, can you hear the C?
BS384 - The First Amendment grants Freedom of Speech THE SECOND GUARANTEES IT!
BS385 - You don't need a pedigree to be a best friend
BS386 - ZenCrafters Total enlightenment in about an hour!
BS387 - Amateur Rocket Scientist My other vehicle is in orbit
BS388 - Witch Wagon - Tailgaters will be Toad
BS389 - Do autoparanoid schizophrenic agnostic dyslexic insomniacs lie awake at night wondering if they might be the dog that's out to get them?
BS390 - Evolution created anchovies - Man's ignorance put them on pizza!
BS391 - Had a life. Traded it for a faster modem
BS392 - Mean People Suck
BS393 - I owe it all to my boss - Ulcers, nausea, paranoia...
BS394 - Smoking Cures Ham
BS395 - Most men would respect a woman's mind more if it bounced gently as she walked.
BS396 - Sanity is a state of mind ...but the taxes are so high, I had to move away.
BS397 - Wizard Wagon - Tailgaters will be toad
BS398 - Objects in mirror may have flunked driver ed
BS399 - Nine out of ten men who have tried camels prefer women.
BS400 - In space, your cat can't hear you open the can
BS401 - Miskatonic Summer Games - Fastest food in Arkham
BS402 - A closed mind doesn't need drugs-- It's already wasted
BS403 - Getting a free kitten proves that you don't need money to get love
BS404 - Life's a beach - and we're just surfing time
BS405 - Reunite Gondwanaland
BS406 - Why do Scotsmen wear kilts? It's easier to run with your kilt up than your pants down!
BS407 - You! Out of the gene pool!
BS408 - REAL SCOTSMEN WEAR KILTS because sheep can hear a zipper at 500 yards!
BS409 - GO AHEAD, HONK If I can hear you, you're in range
BS410 - Driver carries no more than $20 worth of ammunition
BS411 - DO NOT DISTURB Occupant is disturbed enough already
BS412 - BEEN THERE, DONE THAT - Can't remember why...
BS413 - Cats are children that you don't have to send to college
BS414 - I'm a Woman, not a Womb!
BS415 - Smoking is like sex-- It should always be between consenting adults in private
BS416 - Omnipotent Omniscient Omnibenevolent - Pick two.
BS417 - If we can put a man on the moon, why not all of them?
BS418 - To a Cat, People are just Furniture that does Tricks
BS419 - WARNING: The Attorney General has determined that Alcohol, Tobacco and Firearms can be dangerous to your health, and get away with it!
BS420 - To a dog, you're one of the family. To a cat, you're one of the help.
BS421 - My kid sells term papers to your honor student
BS422 - No government is better than NO GOVERNMENT!
BS423 - Never trust a government that doesn't trust YOU!
BS424 - Give the anarchists an inch, and the next thing you know, they want to be in charge!
BS425 - REPEAL INHIBITION!
BS426 - I'm only driving this because aliens ate my Volvo
BS427 - SO MANY CHRISTIANS -- SO FEW LIONS
BS429 - Come out, come out, whatever you are!
BS430 - People are more passionately opposed to wearing fur than leather because it's safer to harass rich women than bikers.
BS431 - I can't go to work today. The voices told me to stay home and clean the guns.
BS432 - God was my co-pilot ..but we crashed in the Andes, and I had to eat him.
BS433 - You'd be like this, too, if they dropped a house on your sister!
BS434 - Freedom of Religion means ALL Religions
BS435 - If a man's home is his castle, he can learn to clean it!
BS436 - Learn from your parents' mistakes, USE BIRTH CONTROL
BS437 - We've got ENOUGH Youth, what we NEED is a Fountain of SMART!
BS438 - Where there's a will, I want to be in it!
BS439 - Out of mind - Back in 5 minutes
BS440 - I get plenty of exercise just pushing my luck!
BS441 - The more people I meet, the more I like my dog!
BS442 - The more people I meet, the better I like my cat!
BS443 - Dogs are like children that you don't have to send to college
BS444 - WARNING! Dates in calendar are closer than they appear!
BS445 - It's lonely at the top... but you eat better.
BS446 - WORK is for people who don't know how to FISH
BS447 - Work is for people who don't SURF THE NET
BS448 - Cats make great pets -- out of their owners
BS449 - Ask me about my vow of silence
BS450 - Why suffer from insanity when you can revel in it?
BS451 - "Normal" is a setting on my washing machine.
BS452 - Few women admit their age. Fewer men act it.
BS453 - Leave Earth Now - Ask Me How
BS454 - Please don't honk - Driver may go Postal if awakened
BS455 - Reality is the Anchovy on the Pizza of Life
BS456 - i suport publik edjicashun
BS457 - Support the Math Illiteracy Tax - Buy Lottery Tickets
BS458 - Reality is the Hairball in the Catnap of Life
BS459 - Cats are amazing! Cute, furry, friendly, and only 140 calories per serving!
BS460 - ALL MEN ARE ANIMALS! but if you can train them, they make good pets...
BS461 - In case of Rapture, can I have your car?
BS462 - The "Christian Right" is NEITHER
BS463 - Fight Organized Crime -- Don't Re-elect ANYONE!
BS464 - Will Genetically Engineer Organisms For Food
BS465 - I'm not lost, I'm exploring!
BS466 - Give a man a fish, and he will eat for one day. Teach a man to fish and he will sit in a boat drinking beer every day!
BS467 - I am getting so tired of slitting the throats of people who say I'm a violent psychopath!
BS468 - Political Correctness is Intellectual Fascism
BS469 - THANK GOD FOR ATHEISM -- Without that, I'd have nothing to believe in!
BS470 - POSTAL! (with graphic of speeding bullet)
BS471 - "NOT A MORNING PERSON" DOES NOT EVEN BEGIN TO DESCRIBE IT!
BS472 - THIMK [please note; this is not a typo; the sticker really is spelled with an "M".]
BS473 - A good university needs a football team like a fish needs a bicycle.
BS474 - A Real Friend isn't someone that you use once and throw away, a Real Friend is someone that you can use again and again!
BS475 - All right, who put the "Morning People" in charge?
BS476 - When cryptography is outlawed, 7c%K@mp8T=;Rfs9bVhi*5xFwW/Q[uY
BS477 - Beautiful women don't intimidate me, but I sure wish they would try!
BS478 - The first cup of coffee recapitulates phylogeny
BS479 - It's OUR money, not theIRS!
BS480 - FREE TIBET! -- with weapons technology purchase
BS481 - EARTH IS FULL! GO HOME!
BS482 - Tourist season is coming up! Don't forget your license!
BS483 - Those who dance are thought mad by those who hear not the music.
BS484 - Sona si Latine loqueris! [translation: Honk if you speak Latin!]
BS485 - Quantum materiae materietur marmota monax si marmota monax materiam possit materiari? [Latin equivalent of the infamous woodchuck question]
BS486 - Illiud Latine dici non potest. [Latin for "You can't say that in latin."]
BS487 - Stand aside, plebians! I am on Imperial business!
BS488 - There are two means of refuge from the miseries of life - music and cats. -- Albert Schweitzer
BS489 - 150 Million True Believers. 144,000 taken up in the Rapture. Do YOU feel LUCKY?
BS490 - Some days, it's just not worth crawling out of the primordial ooze.
BS491 - Carpe Noctem - Anything worth doing happens after dark!
BS492 - I have NOT lost my mind. It's backed up on the server. (and the network is down again...)
BS493 - Seven out of ten voices in my head say "Call in sick"
BS494 - I get along with God just fine. It's his fan clubs that I can't stand.
BS495 - CHAOS - More than a theory, it's the Way of Life
BS496 - If I want to hear the pitter-patter of little feet, I'LL PUT SHOES ON THE CAT!
BS497 - All around me I see Chaos, Panic and Disorder. At last, my work here is done!
BS498 - PARTY SKYCLAD!
BS499 - Jesus loves you. I don't. Now, BACK OFF!
IA499 - Jesus loves you. Everyone else thinks you're an asshole. (IA499 is available exclusively from Pegasus Publishing. It's listed and illustrated here so that you'll know where to get it; http://www.pegasuspublishing.com (It's a long story.)
BS500 - This space intentionally left blank
IA500 - Have you forgotten about Jesus? Isn't it about time you did? (IA500 is available exclusively from Pegasus Publishing. It's listed and illustrated here so that you'll know where to get it; http://www.pegasuspublishing.com (It's a long story.)
BS501 - I'm not really a bitch. I've just had PMS for 30 years.
BS502 - Why, yes, as a matter of fact, I am a Rocket Scientist!
BS503 - Entropy was just a concept, until I got a cat!
BS504 - The fact that no one understands you does NOT make you an Artist!
BS505 - I don't know what your problem is, but I'll bet it's hard to pronounce.
BS506 - WORK as if you don't need the money. LOVE as if you've never been hurt. DANCE as if no one is watching.
BS507 - Be reasonable. DO IT MY WAY!
BS508 - Opinions expressed on this vehicle are not necessarily those of the driver.
BS509 - Lingua mortua sola lingua bona est. [translation: The only good language is a dead language.]
BS510 - Old lawyers never die -- they just lose their appeal!
BS511 - How many roads must a man go down before he'll admit that he's lost?
BS512 - Question Authority - Don't ask why, just DO IT!
BS513 - Sleep is a poor substitute for coffee
BS514 - DEATH to all fanatics!
BS515 - If the Rapture would rid us of some of these idiots, it couldn't come soon enough!
BS516 - The problem isn't water, or waste, or space, or fuel. The problem is PEOPLE!
BS517 - Where was the INS in 1492 when we REALLY needed them? (with graphic of Sitting Bull)
BS518 - Drive with care. You are on Indian land. (with North America graphic)
BS519 - BIA Betraying Indian Assets since 1824
BS520 - If you believe you can tell me what to think, I believe I can tell you where to go.
BS521 - CUSTER WORE ARROW SHIRTS
BS522 - We do not inherit the Earth from our ancestors, we borrow it from our children.
BS523 - I'll "get a life" when someone can prove that it's better than what I've got now.
BS524 - Knowledge is power. Power corrupts. Study hard. Be Evil.
BS525 - Change is inevitable. Growth is optional.
BS526 - I always said I wanted to Be Somebody. I guess I should have been more specific!
BS527 - ALPHA FEMALE
BS528 - In my next life, I want more memory installed!
BS529 - CARPE BANDWIDTH!
BS530 - Invest in America Buy a Congressman!
BS531 - Is that how they drive on your planet?
BS532 - Steal from one person, and you're a criminal. Steal from EVERYONE, and you're a GOVERNMENT!
BS533 - Money talks Chocolate Sings!
BS534 - Remember when this [Christian fish] wasn't a WARNING LABEL?
BS535 - BAN BUMPER STICKERS!
BS536 - Si hoc adfixum in obice legere potes, et liberaler educatus et nimim propinquus ades! [translation: If you can read this bumper sticker, you are both very well educated and much too close! (in Latin)]
BS537 - Only FOOLS believe there's a "Biased Liberal Media"!
BS538 - Proud ancestor of an honor student at STARFLEET ACADEMY
BS539 - REPEAL PROHIBITION!
BS540 - Not your child, Not your choice!
BS541 - Are you making an appointment with St. Peter on that cell phone?
BS542 - You may say I'm a dreamer, but I'm not the only one. -- John Lennon, 1971
BS544 - Going to church no more makes you a Christian than going swimming makes you a fish
BS545 - Belief is no substitute for knowledge
BS546 - A free society is one where it is safe to be unpopular. Adlai E. Stevenson
BS548 - The four Cat food groups: Dry, Canned, Natural, Yours.
BS549 - On the Road or On the Phone -- PICK ONE!
BS550 - They that can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety. --Benjamin Franklin, 1759
CRIMINALS PREFER UNARMED VICTIMS
A couple from memory.
Gun control is hitting your target.
I'm for gun control...the voices in my head are not.
EBUCK
"But If They Outlaw Guns, What Will We Use To Shoot The Liberals?"
1st SWAT Cop..whispering.."Alright, I'm gonna hang back here and cover you. Go on up there and kick that SOB's door in."
2nd SWAT Cop..whispering.."Are you high, again? Did you read those stickers? Guys probably in there armed to the teeth and out of his mind."
1st Swat Cop..whispering.."Well, I aint goin in there either....wanna go get some coffee?...."
EBUCK
I'm Out of Calgon and I Have a Gun
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