Skip to comments.High-Priced Emancipation [Book Review: Why There Are No Good Men Left]
Posted on 01/03/2003 7:50:23 AM PST by TroutStalkerEdited on 04/22/2004 11:47:49 PM PDT by Jim Robinson. [history]
Anyone who has ever struggled to find a house to buy should intuitively understand the difficulties faced by the legions of accomplished, educated, 30ish women currently roaming society in search of a husband. They are the stuff of mass entertainment now, these handsome, quick-witted graduates of higher education. On TV, they're the saucy females of "Sex and the City" and "Will & Grace." They surface in fiction as lovelorn Bridget Jones and the hapless heroines of Pam Houston's best-selling short stories.
(Excerpt) Read more at online.wsj.com ...
You said it all. I have nothing to add.
19-22 yr old women would beg to differ. 25 is the upper limit these days before a woman's options begin to diminish rapidly.
Sister married her college sweetheart (a decent fellow) and immediately put him LAST, because of course getting a Ph.D. from U.C. Berkley (gag) and "My Career!" came first. 25 years later, she's divorced and remarried to an unemployed BUM, and has had 2 out of her 4 children wind up in juvenile detention. Yeah, that "have it all" bullsh*t really paid off, didn't it?
I never bought into that FemiNazi tripe(don't exactly know why, either--LOL)-- I always thought getting married, supporting hubby's career, and having babies was a perfectly honorable way to live my life. (Of course, mom and sister were horrified by this......) 25 years later I have a wonderful hubby who shows me the utmost respect and (as my friends tell me) was a "great catch". (LOL)
I feel like I've done a good job as a mother because my 14 year old daughter wants to get married "when I grow up" and wants to stay home to raise her "four children". Put that together with daughter knowing the importance of dating/marrying another Catholic, I'm not worried she'll end up like the perpetually unhappy and single sluts on "Sex in the City."
Somehow I ended up "having it all" (nice family, professional career)--but I think I got there primarily because I put hubby, daughter and family life FIRST, not the other way around.
By the way, there are a lot of "good men" left. But the good men are NOT interested in "Sex in the City" style sluts, and don't like to be with ball-busting single women who lead promiscuous, unhappy lives.
I met my wife at a church social.
I know many married couples who met at church young adult gatherings.
I discern a pattern here...
Point the first - campuses have become hotbeds of political correctness which feminist zealots have essentially bullied out of the relationship business - one extreme example is the insistence on a formal, signed contract prior to dating and a grotesque step-by-step permissions system that resembles nothing so much as the grade-school "first base, second base" continuum. Many feminists feel that this is a measure of protection against "date-rape" and other newly-minted social constructs; in fact, it militates against normal heterosexual dating practices and they know that full well. That is not a side benefit, it is the main agenda.
So where does the mating game move to? It wasn't always on campus, after all, it used to be centered around church and workplace. It is no accident that progressive social engineers have targeted these, for reasons in addition to the re-ordering of societal sexual roles, but the rules have definitely changed here as well. Bars? If we are truly down to finding life partners in establishments dedicated to evanescent pleasure-seeking, then we shouldn't be surprised if the relationships turn out to be evanescent as well. As my Dad once put it, the type of women you meet in a bar are the type of women who are in bars. Same goes for the men.
There is obviously a problem here.
Point the second - just about the time many women realize that being a man isn't all it's cracked up to be, the men of their generation have found that being in a relationship isn't all it's cracked up to be, either through the failure of relationships via divorce or through having refused to play the game so long that the game is simply no longer as compelling as it used to be. This does not augur well for a woman who may not be as physically attractive as she used to be.
The upshot here that feminists discover in their drive to attain the advantages of masculinity is that the traditionally masculine role of seeker after relationships is not always the advantage that it appears, and becomes less so as time goes on - for both sexes.
I would question the premise of the title - there are plenty of "good" men available; it's just that not all of the women bitching about it are "good" women.
However, most women (and men) dont realize that successful marriages are usually those where the couple grows and achieves together, rather than before marriage. Once a man or woman has achieved a certain level in life, marriage is no longer looked upon from the perspective of what can be gained from it, but of what can be lost from it.
That is where I am, and many other men. We are no longer willing to make the compromises and sacrifices necessary for a successful marriage, and are left with those same "Sex in the City" types to choose from, of which we say "No thanks", and are called women-haters for our trouble.
Women need to understand and accept that if they don't get us when we are young, odds are, you won't get us at all, because after a lifetime of building a career and lifestyle, you are not going to find too many of us willing to take the risk of losing it all over a woman, when there are so many available for temporary amusement.
Snotty, big-mouthed, self-important, slutty, bitches....THAT'S why they're still single. My upstairs neighbor is one of these.
There are some good women left, also. But the good women (like the good men) also happen to be the "boring" types who don't hang out in bars, go to church regularly , and probably don't look like centerfolds. I hope the "good men" left will eventually find some of these good women. The future of our country depends on this(not joking, either).
Uh, yah, riiiiight. Sometimes independence is just a facade for undependable.
Hubby is a sales manager at IBM and has to work with a number of females who fit the above description perfectly. These women are quite "accomplished" (make good money) by the FemiNazi standard of success--and nearly every single one of them is in a perpetual state of defensive, paranoid, PMS. They're also either divorced single moms or single mothers of b*st*rd children---and are mad at the world (and men in particular) because they're "stuck" raising their kids alone.