FRENCH DISSING IN THE U.S.A

Daily Mirror (U.K.) ^ | 03/17/03 | Tony Parsons

[Pokey78]

I HOPE that the continent of Europe never again needs help from the United States of America.

I hope that there's never some murderous little tyrant - another Hitler, another Milosevic - that Europe needs help in taming.

I hope that there's never some economic catastrophe that requires American dollars to make it right, as they did at the end of the Second World War.

I hope that the euro experiment works. I hope that all those peace-loving souls in Belgium, Germany and France can somehow muster an army to protect themselves.

I hope that the continent I live on never again needs to go cap in hand to the Americans.

Because if that black day ever comes, I have the feeling that America might just tell Europe where to go.

On the eve of war, there is a tangible anger in America. But surprisingly little of it is directed against the Iraqis. It is the French who are detested.

"This is all about oil," the Brits hear all the time. And Americans think it is "all about oil" too. The $50billion worth of oil contracts that France has with Iraq. In American eyes, that is why the French are so keen to avoid war.

Anti-French feeling in the United Kingdom is never more than a passing fancy, a jokey bit of "hop-off-you-Frogs" banter.

Not in America.

THE cafeteria in the House of Representatives no longer serves French fries - chips to you and me, guvnor. Now they sell something called "freedom fries". That sounds nuts - and of course it is.

But when a furious Congresswoman presents a "bring home our dead" bill demanding that the 75,000 American men and boys who died in France during two world wars be dug up and brought home, you realise that this is more than "hop-off-you-Frogs" banter.

Congresswoman Ginny Brown-Waite says, "The remains of our brave servicemen should be buried in patriotic soil, not in a country that has turned its back on the US and on the memory of Americans who fought and died there."

That's the difference between the British and the Americans.

We do not feel that the British casualties in two world wars died to liberate the French. We believe that we were fighting for our nation's survival. Just like the Russians.

It is different for Americans.

Throughout the 20th century, through two world wars and one Cold War, America gave all the blood and money Europe needed to keep it free.

They feel that the current crisis has proved that Europeans are, when all is said and done, an ungrateful bunch of Euro bastards who do not give a flying baguette about the 75,000 American graves in Europe.

Anti-European feeling goes right across the board of public opinion, even among the millions of Americans who are passionately against attacking Iraq. America is united in feeling betrayed by Europe. America is finally starting to understand that - to Europe's eternal shame - there is an opinion that 9/11 was America's comeuppance.

Secretaries and waiters leaping from the top of the burning twin towers? The fault of American arrogance.

A terrified four-year-old girl cowering at the back of a hijacked plane? Blame it on America's support for Israel. A stewardess with her throat slit by a carpet cutter? One in the eye for American imperialism.

Those 3,000 dead, murdered on live television? Europe blames America.

When 9/11 happened, you might have expected to see Palestinians dancing in the street. But who would have expected the grim look of satisfaction on the faces of old Europe?

But the British are absolved of Europe's sins. Those who are against the war admire Britain because we had a peace march where one million people filled the streets.

Those for the war admire Britain because Tony Blair has been a true friend to America. And although the man on the M25 might make jibes about Blair being a "poodle", among American hawks our Prime Minister is seen as dangerously strong-willed.

THERE is a school of opinion in America that believes the war could have been over by last Christmas if Tony Blair had not been so keen on proceeding through the correct diplomatic channels. Nobody calls Tony Blair a poodle in the USA.

It has been good to be British in America these past few weeks

For America has been reminded that Britain is the best friend it has in the world, joined by blood, language, history, instinct and culture.

When will the British wake up from their pathetic little dreams of being Europeans and realise that we have been looking for our future in all the wrong places?

Who wants to be European today? Who wants to be an ungrateful, unprincipled, two-faced, pacifist, Euro-grasping, oil-hungry Lilliputian?

No matter what happens over the coming days and weeks, it is true what they say. The English Channel is far wider than the Atlantic.

_______________

WEST SIDE GORY

THE traveller to America can never quite decide if America is the friendliest place in the world or the most heartless.

Individually, Americans are kind, generous, supportive. They want you to succeed. Unlike back in Britain, where people want you to fall flat on your face.

The British convention of scratching cars out of pure spite does not exist in America. They might steal your car. Or they might ram it and rob you at gunpoint. But nobody is going to scratch it out of petty jealousy.

America is a strange cocktail of affability and brutality. You walk into a Banana Republic store and people are so keen to make you happy that you feel you could say, "Any chance of a blow job?" and nobody would bat an eyelid.

But then you pick up a paper and realise that this is still a very young, very violent country. A woman was sacked from her job delivering pizza after attending to a man who was lying in the street with a gunshot wound.

"She was away from her job for no good reason," said her manager.

But I bet that when that manager gave her the boot, he ordered her to have a really great day.

_________________

A TICKET TO HEAVEN

WHAT I will miss most about the States is the service culture. If you are a paying customer, then people genuinely want you to be happy.

There's none of that snotty "Can-I-help-yew?" service you get in the UK, where some lazy fat cow polishing her nails acts all surprised if you actually walk into her shop.

What I will miss least are the endless security checks at the airports. As absolutely everyone in America knows, it is people on one-way tickets who are invariably picked out by airport security.

And if you are travelling from city to city, as I have been, then all your tickets are one way. American airport security assumes that any terrorist on a suicide mission will only have a one-way ticket. Why shell out for a return ticket when soon you will be in Paradise, surrounded by 99 virgins?

Everyone in America knows about getting pulled over when you are on a one-way ticket.

I hope nobody ever tells the terrorists so they can outwit the system by purchasing a return ticket.

Because then we will really be in trouble.

[mhking]

I have the feeling that America might just tell Europe where to go.

Yep. And the horse you rode in on, too...

[valleygal]

I plan to e-mail this to a few folks, as well. Hopefully, this article will get spread around to many not fortunate enough to be here at FR!

[Beck_isright]

Thanks Pokey and a great article. The writer is 100% correct there is a geniune hate locally for the french, germans and belgians now. If you are seen in a local grocery store picking out a bottle of frog wine, someone will say something rude to you. They have no idead what happens when the U.S., the giant of the world, is awakened and angry. They watch our idiot protesters and think that that is "America". Bad news Euroscum. Real America is on this board, working in factories and on farms, trying to make a living and make the world a better place today and tommorrow. 9-11 changed all that. And we are now filled with a resolve and anger that will not subside until all of our enemies are smited, into ashes and into oblivion.

[xJones]

Dang, Ivan, I forgot to ping you to this thread.

[July 4th]

You walk into a Banana Republic store and people are so keen to make you happy that you feel you could say, "Any chance of a blow job?" and nobody would bat an eyelid.

So that's why that place is so popular.

[joesnuffy]

Telling the truth about the French is hardly "dissing"

[valleygal]

I was surprised by the pizza delivery story as well. When my sister was UPS driver a few years ago,, she saw a very bad accident on 495 in Washington involving a delivery van. The man in the van was near death, his skull all smashed and she sat cradling her head in his lap for a while waiting for the ambulance. I think he died while she was with him.

When she left the scene her uniform was covered in blood and she was near hysterical (but, later, she was able to tell his family what happened and offer them comfort.) She went back to the UPS center and UPS sent out another driver in her place and gave her time off.

I think most Americans will bend over backwards to help someone in need and we'd probably still go to the rescue of all the countries giving us a hard time now, because that's the way we are.

[Grampa Dave]

Lets help this deranged and mentally ill country of frogs commit social suicide.

Just $crew the Frogs with buycotts for the rest of this decade. Here is a simple list of products not to buy:

A little list of French companies and their products to avoid for the rest of this decade"

*New additions to the list thanks to Freepers. If you have an addition, Freepmail me with the URL showing French ownership.

Air France
Air Liquide
Airbus
Alcatel - Based in Paris France
Allegra (Allergy Medication) - Produced by Aventis Pharmaceuticals based in Strasbourg, France
Aqualung (Including: Spirotechnique, Technisub, US Divers, and SeaQuest)
AXA Advisors
Bank of the West - Owned by BNP Paribas
Beneteau (boats)
BF Goodrich - Owned by Michelin
BIC (Razors, Pens & Lighters) - Started in 1945 by Marcel Bich. Originally based just outside of Paris. Began trading on the Paris Stock Exchange in 1972. 40.5% Publicly traded. Bich family still owns 33.5%.
Biotherm (Cosmetics)
Black Bush
Bollinger (Champagne)
*Browning Firearms**
Car & Driver Magazine
Cartier
Chanel
Chivas Regal (Scotch)
Christian Dior
Club Med (Vacations) - Owned in part by Paris based CDC (Caisse des Dépôts
et Consignations)
Culligan (owned by Vivendi)
Dannon (Yogurt & Dairy Foods)
*Decatholon Super Sport Stores or MVP Sport Stores*
DKNY - LVMH acquired 100% of Gabrielle Studio Inc., the privately owned licenser of Donna Karan trademarks back in 2001.
Dom Perignon
Durand Crystal
Elle Magazine
*Emile Henry French Cookware
Essilor Optical Products
Evian
Fina Gas Stations
Fina Oil - Billions invested in Iraqi Oil fields
First Hawaiian Bank
George Magazine
Givenchy
*Guerlain Fragrances
*Grey Goose Vodka
Hennessy
Houghton Mifflin (books)
International Herald Tribune - 181 ave Charles-de-Gaulle - F-92521 Neuilly - FRSource:World Business Council for Sustainable Development '00 [Domain Registration], [Corporate Profile]
Jacobs Creek - Owned by Pernod Ricard since 1989
Jameson (wiskey)
Jerry Springer (talk show)
Krups (coffee and cappaccino makers)
Lancome
Le Creuset (Cookware)
L'Oreal (Health & Beauty Products)
Louis Vuitton
Marie Claire
Martel Cognac
Maybelline
Méphisto (Footwear & Apparel)
Michelin (Tires & Auto Parts) - Their phone number is: (33) 1 45 66 15 53 in France
Mikasa Crystal and Glass (purchased by ARC int'l in 2001)
Moet (Champagne)
Motel 6 - 33, Avenue du Maine- 75755 Paris Cedex 15 France
Motown Records
MP3.com
Mumms (Champagne)
Nissan (Cars) - Majority owned by Renault
Nivea
Normany Butter
Parents Magazine
Peugeot (Automobiles) - Pronounced "Pooh Joe", must be French
Pierre Cardin
Playstation Magazine
ProScan - Owned by Thomson Electronics, France
Publicis Group (Including: Saatchi & Saatchi Advertising)
RCA (televisions & electronics) - Owned by Thomson Electronics, France
Red Magazine
Red Roof Inns - Owned by the Accor group based in France
Renault (Automobiles)
Road & Track Magazine
Roquefort Cheese - All Roquefort cheese is made in France
Rowenta (Toasters, Irons, Coffee makers, etc)
Royal Canadian
Salomon (Skis)
Seagram's Gin
Sierra Software and Computer Games
Smart & Final
Sofitel (Hotels) - Owned by the Accor group based in France
Sparkletts (Water) - Owned by Danone, based in France
Spencer Gifts
Sundance Channel
Taylor Made (Golf)
Technicolor
T-Fal (Kitchenware)
The Glenlivet (Scotch
Total Gas Stations
UbiSoft (Computer Games)
Uniroyal
Uniroyal Tires - Owned by Michelin
Universal Studios (Music, Movies & Theme Parks) - Universal Studios is owned by Vivendi-Universal, headquartered in Paris France
USFilter
Veritas Group
Veuve Clicquot Champagne
Vittel
Vivendi - Vivendi Headquarters, Paris France
Wild Turkey (bourbon)
*Winchester Firearms (US Repeating Arms)**
Woman's Day Magazine
Yoplait - France-based Sodiaal owns a 50% stake of Yoplait
Yves Saint Laurent
*Yves Rocher Cosmetics
Zodiac Inflatable Boats

*New additions to the list thanks to Freepers. If you have an addition, Freepmail me with the URL showing French ownership.

** Sad news but these two companies are owned by the Belgian Company Herstal, (French Light)

I'm asking for volunteers to create a good product list of alternative products. If you are an expert in a category or would like start a list of American or Ally products/services, let me know. I will list the alternative category and have your freeper name as the list keeper. That way people can freep you for your list. Once you get it set up and have a master copy in your FreepMail, you can just copy it for each reply to the request.

[George W. Bush]

No matter what happens over the coming days and weeks, it is true what they say. The English Channel is far wider than the Atlantic.

Great conversational piece from the standpoint of a working Brit. Wonder if he's Tory or Labor? Not that it matters, given his perspective.

[Mister Baredog]

This weekend why did Big Media only run stories on the few antiwar protestors and ZERO on the hundreds of Rally's for the Troops?

However that right wing network FOX covered both sides. CNN is the anti-war network and continues to ignore other voices.

[MrConfettiMan]

ping

[lavaroise]

weak, very weak.

[sit-rep]

Ummmm... Another Milosevic??

What did he do?

[Radix]

I see that you have added the Grey Goose Vodka to your list since I last saw it yesterday!

 

I do not drink much Vodka, but when I did it was the Grey Goose!

 

Oh the sacrifices that we make.

 

Oh the Humanity!

 

Keep up the good work!

[Grampa Dave]

One of our freepers sent me a freep mail about Grey Goose Vodka. Sure enough it is a French product made by a French Company. I don't drink hard liguor with the exception of a margirita every once and awhile. So I had no idea. The low kick is that Wild Turkey is owned by a French Company.

[kaylar]

I'll bet he read about the incident-scanned it-and thought it happened in the US because he was reading a US site.

[Salman]

Telling the truth about the French is hardly "dissing"

Sure it is. Dissing == disrespecting. Telling the truth in this case requires disrespecting.

[Warren_Piece]

For America has been reminded that Britain is the best friend it has in the world, joined by blood, language, history, instinct and culture.

On September 11, 2001, I sat in shock, watching the events unfold. No tears, no anger, just shock. I didn't snap out of it until many sleepless hours later. When the news showed the Brits playing 'The Star Spangled Banner' at the Changing of the Guard, the dam burst. I wept uncontrollably. It is a moment that is seared into my brain forever. Just thinking of it, even today, brings me to tears.

God Save the Queen, indeed.

[MissouriForBush]

I am back in the US now after working for 2 years in Germany. I can assure you that the best friends of American expats working abroad, in Germany or elsewhere, are our fellow British expats. We Americans shared many a good time with our British friends at pub quizzes and other social activities in Munich.

[Library Lady]

The British convention of scratching cars out of pure spite does not exist in America. They might steal your car. Or they might ram it and rob you at gunpoint. But nobody is going to scratch it out of petty jealousy.

Not exactly, unless the jerk who did that to my car last summer was British.