Free Republic 3rd quarter FReepathon underway! - Thread 2

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[Brad’s Gramma]

Health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.

[Brad’s Gramma]

Get the last word in: Apologize.

[Brad’s Gramma]

Some people are like Slinkies . . . not really good for anything, but you still can't help but smile when you see one tumble down the stairs.

[Brad’s Gramma]

Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing.

[Brad’s Gramma]

Have you noticed since everyone has a camcorder these days no one talks about seeing UFOs like they use to?

[Brad’s Gramma]

Whenever I feel blue, I start breathing again.

[Brad’s Gramma]

All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to criticism.

[glock rocks]

A weed is a plant that has mastered every survival skill except for learning how to grow in rows.

[Brad’s Gramma]

Why does a slight tax increase cost you two hundred dollars and a substantial tax cut saves you thirty cents?

[Brad’s Gramma]

In the 60's, people took acid to make the world weird. Now the world is weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.

[Brad’s Gramma]

Politics is supposed to be the second oldest profession. I have come to realize that it bears a very close resemblance to the first.

[Brad’s Gramma]

How is it one careless match can start a forest fire, but it takes a whole box to start a campfire?

[Brad’s Gramma]

Dat's all folks.

[Brad’s Gramma]

A blonde was speeding in a 35 mile per hour zone when a local police cruiser pulled her over and the officer walked up to the car. The female police officer also happened to be a blonde and she asked for the blonde's driver's license. The driver searched frantically in her purse for a while and finally said to the blonde policewoman, "What does a driver's license look like?"

Irritated, the blonde cop said, "You dummy, it's got your picture on it!" The blonde driver frantically searched her purse again and found a small rectangular mirror down at the bottom. She held it up to her face and said, "Aha! This must be my driver's license," and handed it to the blonde policewoman.

The blonde cop looked in the mirror, handed it back to the driver and said, "You're free to go. And, if I had known you were a police officer too, we could have avoided all this hassle."

[NautiNurse]

No! No! Don't call it quittin' time...I finally got my [ ] in gear and done paid up. Florida chipping in here

[ValerieUSA]

Thank you
Minnesota
California

[Brad’s Gramma]

Well, THANK you!!!!

VERY much.....

I'll have to see what other stuff I can hunt up for you. AFTER I eat dinner and take Poochers for a walk. Well, actually, Poochers takes ME for a walk. WHAT a sight that is.

[glock rocks]

Thank you, NautiNurse !!

[ValerieUSA]

I went to a Hall and Oates concert and got John Oates' autograph afterward.

[Jim Robinson]

Thank you NautiNurse!!

Just in:

$150 from Florida
$50 from Never Never Land

Thank you Florida and Never Never Land!!