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Posted on 01/01/2002 11:31:15 PM PST by BluesDuke

The brickbats, Berraisms, bromides, and batteries have been recorded...the nominations are in...for the sophomore class of the FREEP Musical Cheeseball Hall of Shame. And the candidates for dishonour (some of which, astute FREEPers will note, are making a return engagement to the nominations list, having failed to cut the cheese when the charter class was nominated) are...


Alan O'Day, "Undercover Angel"
Rose Royce, "Car Wash"
Paper Lace, "The Night Chicago Died"
Looking Glass, "Brandy"
Starland Vocal Band, "Afternoon Delight"
Maria Muldaur, "Midnight at the Oasis"
Blood, Sweat and Tears, "Spinning Wheel"
Neil Diamond, "Cracklin' Rosie"
Albert Hammond, "It Never Rains in Southern California"
Tony Orlando and Dawn, "Tie A Yellow Ribbon"
America, "A Horse With No Name"
Lobo, "Me and You and a Dog Named Boo"
Brewer and Shipley, "One Toke Over The Line"
Zager and Evans, "In The Year 2525"
Cher, "Gypsies, Tramps and Thieves"
Wayne Newton, "Daddy, Don't You Walk So Fast"
Neil Diamond, "Sweet Caroline"
Bobbie Gentry, "Ode to Billie Joe"
Richard Harris, "MacArthur's Park"
Elvis Presley, "In The Ghetto"
Whitney Houston, "I Will Always Love You"
Helen Reddy, "Leave Me Alone"
Jefferson Starship, "We Built This City"
Barry Manilow, "Mandy"
Carroll O'Connor and Jean Stapleton, "Those Were The Days (Theme From All in the Family)
Dawn featuring Tony Orlando, "Knock Three Times"
Elton John, "Bennie and the Jets"
Smokey Robinson and the Miracles, "Tears of a Clown"
Helen Reddy, "Delta Dawn"
B.J. Thomas, "Raindrops Keep Fallin' On My Head"
M.C. Hammer, "U Can't Touch This"
Bobby Darin, "If I Were A Carpenter"
Harry Nilsson, "Coconut"
O.C. Smith, "Little Green Apples"
Mark Lindsay, "Arizona"
Simon and Garfunkel, "Cecilia"
Paul Revere and the Raiders, "Indian Reservation (The Lament of the Cherokee Nation)"
The Knack, "Good Girls Don't"
Carl Douglas, "Kung Fu Fighting"
Frankie Valli, "My Eyes Adored You"
Gary Wright, "Dream Weaver"
Barbra Streisand, "The Way We Were"
Georgie Fame, "The Ballad of Bonnie and Clyde"
Nancy Sinatra, "These Boots Are Made For Walkin'"
Various Artists, "We Are The World"
Daddy Dewdrop, "Chick-A-Boom"
The Commodores, "Three Times A Lady"
Henry Gross, "Shannon"
Gladys Knight and the Pips, "Midnight Train to Georgia"
Elton John, "Crocodile Rock"
Elton John, "Daniel"
Paul and Linda McCartney, "Uncle Albert/Admiral Halsey"
ABBA, "Dancing Queen"
Gloria Gaynor, "I Will Survive"
Paul Simon, "50 Ways to Love Your Lever"...er, "50 Ways to Leave Your Lover"
Shirley Ellis, "The Name Game"
The Hollies, "He Ain't Heavy - He's My Brother"
The Archies, "Sugar, Sugar"
Napoleon XIV, "They're Coming To Take Me Away"
The Shangri-Las, "Leader of the Pack"
The Partridge Family, "I Think I Love You"
The Beatles, "Revolution No. 9"
Kenny Rogers, "Lucille"
Michael Bolton, "How Am I Supposed To Live Without You"
John Denver, "Sunshine On My Shoulder"
Huey Lewis and the News, "If This Is It"
Dan Hill, "Sometimes When We Touch"
Harry Chapin, "Cats In The Cradle"
Cat Stevens, "Peace Train"
Rupert Holmes, "Escape (The Pina Colada Song)"
Andy Williams, "Moon River"
Peter Schilling, "Major Tom"
Sylvers, "Boogie Fever"
Men Without Hats, "Safety Dance"
Three Dog Night, "Joy To The World"
Mac Davis, "Baby Don't Get Hooked On Me"
Dr. Hook and the Medicine Show, "Sylvia's Mother"
Marshall Tucker Band, "Heard It In A Love Song"
Falco, "Rock Me Amadeus"
Jackie DeShannon, "What The World Needs Now"
Christopher Cross, "Sailing"
Neil Young, "Old Man"
Red Sovine, "Teddy Bear"
Walter Brennan, "Big River"
Jerry Reed, "When You're Hot, You're Hot"
Ray Stevens, "The Streak"
Thomas Dolby, "She Blinded Me By Science"
Bette Midler, "Wind Beneath My Wings"
Christopher Cross, "Theme From Arthur"
Paul McCartney and Wings, "Live and Let Die"
Melissa Manchester, "Your Place or Mine (Theme From A Little Sex)"
Doris Day, "Do Not Disturb"
Andy Williams, "Where Do I Begin (Love Story)"
David Gates, "Goodbye Girl"
Dionne Warwick, "Alfie"
Stephen Bishop, "Animal House"
The Association, "Goodbye, Columbus"
Lulu, "To Sir, With Love"
Connie Francis, "Where The Boys Are"
Maureen McGovern, "The Morning After"
Mary MacGregor, "Torn Between Two Lovers"
Tiny Tim, "Tip Toe Through The Tulips"
Sopwith Camel, "Hello, Hello"
Lorne Green, "Ringo"
Bent Fabric, "Alley Cat"
The Penguins, "Earth Angel"
Louis Armstrong, "Hello, Dolly"
Herman's Hermits, "I'm Henry VIII, I Am"
Bobby Goldsboro, "Watchin' Scotty Grow"
Elvis Presley, "Don't Cry Daddy"
The Rolling Stones, "Angie"
Styx, "Babe"
David Soul, "Don't Give Up On Us"
John Travolta, "Let Her In"
Jack Wagner, "All I Feel"
Gino Vanelli, "I Just Want To Stop"
The Carpenters, "Calling Occupants of Interplanetary Craft"
The Carpenters, "Sing"
The Carpenters, "Yesterday Once More"
The Beach Boys, "Rock and Roll Music"
Eydie Gorme, "Blame It On The Bossa Nova" (I'm begging someone to get enough votes that we can retire this turkey and the Cheeseball Queen of Tarts once and for all!)
Michelle Lee, "L. David Sloan"
The Village (of the Damned) People, "Y.M.C.A."
The Poppy Family, "Which Way You Goin', Billy?"
Bo Donaldson and the Heywoods, "Billy, Don't Be A Hero"
Kenny G., "Songbird"
Barry Manilow, "Daybreak"
Hurricane Smith, "Oh, Babe, What Would You Say?"
Manfred Mann's Earth Band, "Blinded By The Light"
The 1910 Fruitgum Company, "1,2,3, Red Light"
Sammy Davis, Jr., "The Candy Man"
Coolio, "Gangsta's Paradise"
The New Vaudeville Band, "Winchester Cathedral"
The Playmates, "Beep Beep"
Rosemary Clooney, "Come On-A My House"
Madonna, "Santa Baby"
Jump n' The Saddle, "Grandma Got Run Over By A Reindeer"
The Silver Convention, "Fly Robin Fly"
Musique, Inc., "In The Bush" (As in, "Push, push...")
M, "Pop Muzik"
The Knack, "Baby Talks Dirty"
Red Buttons, "The Ho Ho Song"
The Rolling Stones, "Fool to Cry"
Jeannie C. Riley, "Harper Valley P.T.A."
Lionel Ritchie and Diana Ross, "Endless Love" (Or was that Diana Ross and Lionel Ritchie?)
Gilbert O'Sullivan, "Alone Again (Naturally)"
Engelbert Humperdinck, "The Last Waltz"
Tom Jones, "Delilah"
Donovan, "Mellow Yellow"
Freddie and the Dreamers, "Do The Freddie"
The Cowsills, "Hair"
Ray Anthony and His Orchestra, "The Bunny Hop"
Ray Anthony and His Orchestra, "The Hokey Pokey"
Tommy Dorsey Orchestra under the direction of Warren Covington, "Tea For Two Cha Cha"
Senator Bobby, "Wild Thing"
Elton John and Kiki Dee, "Don't Go Breaking My Heart"
Kiki Dee Band, "I've Got The Music In Me"
The Grass Roots, "Sooner or Later"
Vanity Fare, "Hitchin' A Ride"
Crazy Elephant, "Gimme Gimme Good Lovin'"
Edison Lighthouse, "Love Grows (Where My Rosemary Goes)"
The Flying Machine, "Smile a Little Smile For Me"
Ray Stevens, "Gitarzan"
Elvis Presley, "Devil in Disguise"
Vikki Carr, "It Must Be Him"
Blue Swede, "Hooked On A Feeling" (yes, the ooga-chaka version!)
B.J. Thomas, "Another Somebody Done Somebody Wrong Song"
Jonathan King, "Everyone's Gone To The Moon"
Bobby Sherman, "Julie, Do Ya Love Me"
Queen, "We Are The Champions"
Queen, "Fat Bottomed Girls"
Brooklyn Bridge, "Worst That Could Happen"
Peggy March, "I Will Follow Him"
Annette Funicello, "Tall Paul"
Dodie Stevens, "Pink Shoelaces"
Steve Lawrence, "Go Away Little Girl" (never let it be said that we didn't try to give the husband equal time...)
Paul Petersen, "My Dad"
Milli Vanilli, "Girl You Know It's True"
Steely Dan, "Rikki, Don't Lose That Number"


And, from the albums...

Leonard Nimoy, Mr. Spock's Music From Outer Space
Adam and the Ants, Stand and Deliver
The Electric Prunes, Mass in F Minor
The Knack, Get the Knack
The Knack, ...but the little girls understand
The Village People, Macho Man
Bobby Sherman, Bobby Sherman
Donovan, Wear Your Love Like Heaven
Peter Lemongello, Love '76
John Tesh, Live at Red Rocks
Barbra Streisand, Superman
Herb Alpert and the Tijuana Brass, Whipped Cream and Other Delights
Barry Manilow, Barry Manilow Live
Elvis Presley, any one of his film soundtracks from G.I. Blues through Clambake
This Is Spinal Tap
Uriah Heep, Demons and Wizards

This is going to be very difficult. I think I will reserve judgement for a day or two.

Here is a contender:



Any song by Elton John is a contender but I admit to quite liking one of the ones you mentioned.

You may be unfamiliar with the Black Lace song Aggadoo (spelling probably incorrect) and you would be advised to keep it that way.

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