Keyword: antifrenchhumor

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  • The World Is Their Coop: The cluck of the French

    04/14/2003 5:46:57 PM PDT · by Utah Girl · 10 replies · 170+ views
    NRO ^ | 4/14/2003 | Denis Boyles
    There's been far too much lampooning of the French character lately. It's unfair, intolerant, and ultimately inaccurate. So one wishes that the French press would just lay off self-parody for a while. A trio of items: ZUT! IT'S NEVER TO LATE TO SURRENDER! Over the weekend, a worried Le Figaro took a look at the plight of U.S. soldiers in Iraq and, reflecting the reported "softening" of anti-Americanism among the French, called for bygones to be bygones. It was time, the paper said, for France to come to the aid of her "oldest ally" — and to send in French...
  • How to Hate the French: A User's Guide: Michael Lewis

    04/14/2003 7:03:25 AM PDT · by WaveThatFlag · 89 replies · 440+ views
    Bloomberg ^ | April 9, 2003 | Michael Lewis
    <p>Berkeley, California, April 9 (Bloomberg) -- It's astonishing how much easier it has become in America in just the last few weeks to hate the French, even for those who shouldn't.</p> <p>A random sampling of three friends who disapprove of the war in Iraq and enjoy a good Burgundy reveals that all of them are inclined more than ever to detest our former ally. Trouble is, they don't know how to do it.</p>
  • French's Mustard Company Release:

    04/13/2003 7:09:29 PM PDT · by 30-06 Springfield · 18 replies · 567+ views
    The makers of French's mustard recently released this statement: We at French's Mustard wish to put an end to statements that have been made that our product is manufactured in France. There is no relationship, nor has there ever been a relationship between our mustard and the country of France. Indeed, our mustard is manufactured in Rochester, New York. The only thing we have in common is that we are both yellow.
  • IN PARIS CELEBRATION PARADE OF THE VICTORY OVER SADDAM, MEDALS TO THEIR MILITARY

    04/11/2003 7:26:03 AM PDT · by Chancellor Palpatine · 42 replies · 240+ views
    Victory parade down the Champs Elysees. Triumphant ships of the French Navy steaming into Marseilles. All those valiant Frenchmen were eagerly awaiting the presentation of this! Presentation! Our Belgian friends were honored too!
  • CHIRAC: VICTORY IS OURS!

    04/10/2003 9:14:22 AM PDT · by Sir Gawain · 35 replies · 102+ views
    CHIRAC: VICTORY IS OURS!Praises French Role in CoalitionFrench President Jacques Chirac took to the airwaves today to praise the French role in Operation Iraqi Freedom, pronouncing, “Victory is ours.” In a national address, Mr. Chirac praised the French people, soldiers and politicians for their “steadfastness and bravery as part of this glorious international coalition.” He also had warm words for the Iraqi people, telling them, “We French come not as conquerors, but as liberators.” Mr. Chirac, his eyes welling with tears at various points of his speech, said he was “deeply moved” by scenes of jubilation in Baghdad, adding, “When...
  • Caption: Jacques Chirac Meets With Iranian President

    04/10/2003 9:56:18 AM PDT · by GulliverSwift · 20 replies · 226+ views
    "Right this way.... You're late, Saddam's funeral has already started." "So it is agreed, Mr. Chirac. You will send me missiles and we will send you testosterone." "This is how I cross my legs when I'm feeling cutesy-- why aren't you doing it?"
  • Caption This! Chirac weighing in on role after war

    04/08/2003 2:34:06 PM PDT · by SquirrelKing · 31 replies · 215+ views
    Tue Apr 8, 2:25 PM ET French President Jacques Chirac (R) answers questions after his meeting with U.N. High Commissioner for Refugees Ruud Lubbers of the Netherlands (L) at the Elysee Palace in Paris April 8, 2003. Chirac said that the United Nations (news - web sites) alone should take charge of the reconstruction of Iraq (news - web sites) after the U.S.-led war. (Charles Platiau/Reuters)
  • French Cartoons From Slate (go figure)

    04/07/2003 5:49:02 PM PDT · by GulliverSwift · 8 replies · 587+ views
    This one's my favorite. Of course, CNN up there on top is also on the "buddies" list. There are more, but this is enough. You can see them all at Slate.
  • French Dictionary (2003 Edition)

    04/01/2003 11:50:56 AM PST · by mukraker · 6 replies · 174+ views
    Rush
    French Dictionary: ~ Conflict Resolution: see "SURRENDER"
  • French Naval Capabilities (Seriously)

    03/30/2003 7:28:49 PM PST · by Enemy Of The State · 34 replies · 1,342+ views
    World Navies Today: FranceRevised 24 March 2002 Version 1.20 Compiled and Maintained by: Andrew Toppan World Navies Today Main Page: http://www.hazegray.org/worldnav/ This list includes all surface combatants, submarines, amphibious ships, mine warfare vessels, patrol craft (over 100 tons displacement), and all auxiliaries (over 500 tons displacement). Non-self-propelled craft and vessels without seagoing capability are not included. Ships not yet commissioned, or in long-term overhaul/conversion, are listed in [brackets]. Navigation and surface-search radars are not listed. All designations & classifications are unofficial; they may or may not correspond to "official" designations. Fleet assignments: ATL -- Atlantic PAC -- Pacific MED --...
  • Madison Party Fetes all Things French

    03/29/2003 2:25:00 PM PST · by sarcasm · 18 replies · 145+ views
    AP ^ | March 29, 2003
    A group of Madison residents have had enough of French bashing. So they got together at a local community center for a meal celebrating all things French: cheeses, wines, bread. Even French fries were on the menu. Anti-French feelings have surfaced around the country since French President Jacques Chirac refused to support the war in Iraq. While more of the people who attended Friday night's party oppose war, the event was not an anti-war protest. Organizer Norah Cashin says she just wanted to do something to show French people that not all Americans are against them. She feels French bashing...
  • Mon Dieu! New French Army Knife! get yours today!

    03/11/2003 6:04:56 PM PST · by TheBigB · 20 replies · 259+ views
  • Peter Beaman: Bashing the French gets us nowhere

    03/27/2003 9:58:52 AM PST · by RayBob · 56 replies · 118+ views
    Pittsburgh Post Gazette ^ | March 17, 2003 | Peter Beaman
    <p>Bashing the French leads to some difficult issues. Would the "Freedom Kiss" be less erotic? Would we have to say that George W. Bush took "Freedom Leave" from his Texas Air National Guard unit in the early 1970s?</p> <p>The real -- and serious -- issue is that we are bashing ourselves. The early stated French position on the war to be fought in Iraq was clear enough: War is the failure of diplomacy and not a good result; we should allow inspections to continue to the point where a negative can be (dis)proven: Saddam has (no) weapons of mass destruction. Things are changing rapidly, but this view -- the "Freedom View" --has been widely held by Americans: about 50 percent. Those who would eliminate "French" from our vocabulary are ignoring the very "Big Fact" (so dear to Fox News) that debate about the war in Iraq is an American, not a "French" or "Freedom" issue.</p>
  • France sets up new terror alert system based on color codes

    03/27/2003 11:50:48 AM PST · by lainie · 38 replies · 390+ views
    AP/Yahoo via Drudge ^ | March 27, 2003 | AP
    PARIS - France introduced a new terrorism alert system on Thursday, with four color-coded levels from yellow to scarlet to make the national warning plan more flexible and understandable. Until now, France had only two grades of alert for its terror warning system, called Vigipirate: "simple" and "reinforced." Vigipirate has been on "reinforced" alert since the Sept. 11, 2001 attacks, and French authorities have been even more watchful since war broke out in Iraq. France qualified the terror risk on Thursday as orange — the second-lowest of four levels. The government said an attack was "plausible," there was no imminent...
  • 2 Giant French Flags @ Local Theatre, Owner Proud of Terrorist Loving French (my title)

    03/27/2003 2:15:33 AM PST · by putupon · 25 replies · 208+ views
    www.michaelgraham.com ^ | 3-27-03 | Michael Graham
    THURSDAY, MARCH 27, 2003 A (SMALL) VICTORY IN THE BATTLE FOR RICHMOND! Wednesday on the Michael Graham Experience we talked to the folks at the historic Byrd Theatre about their decision to put up two huge, car-lot sized French flags to promote their upcoming French film festival. Sure, it's not that big a deal, the Byrd is certainly free to do what it wants and the community is free to be annoyed by it, fine. But for me, a line was crossed when the Byrd's General Manager said "I'm just as proud to put up those flags today as I...
  • HERE COMES THE FRENCH ARMY

    03/18/2003 4:32:22 PM PST · by IowaHawk · 10 replies · 114+ views
    Amazon.com ^ | 03/18/03 | Ludwig Bemelmans
  • (Humor)Bush's Message to Chirac

    03/18/2003 3:12:22 PM PST · by jern · 2 replies · 91+ views
  • Pennsylvania Man Advocates Return of Statue of Liberty

    03/18/2003 3:10:05 AM PST · by prisoner6 · 15 replies · 320+ views
    Pennsylvania Man Advocates Return of Statue of Liberty (White Oak, PA) -- With war looming in the Middle East, and the controversial objections from the French, a White Oak, Pennsylvania man has come up with an idea for the United States to make a strong stance against France. Josh Wander has started a website, called www.giveitback.net, in which he advocates returning the Statue of Liberty. Wander says that America would make a strong statement by getting rid of the statue, which was a symbol of friendship and peace from France in the late 1800's. The site has logged over one...
  • French Humor

    03/17/2003 5:31:34 PM PST · by MastMan · 16 replies · 327+ views
    Finally a cartoon I agree with!
  • The Little Red Hen

    03/17/2003 10:22:48 AM PST · by EveningStar · 20 replies · 256+ views
    Free Conservatives ^ | March 17, 2003 | MysteriousStranger
    One summer day the US found a nexus between the 9-11 attacks and Iraq and further found serious violations of many UN Resolutions, in addition to genocide and war-mongering on the part of Saddam. "This is wrong!" said the US to herself. "I will correct it." She asked France: "Will you help me correct the violation?" "Not I," said France. She asked Germany: "Will you help me correct the violation?" "Not I," said Germany. She asked Russia: "Will you help me correct the violation?" "Not I," said Russia. She asked Turkey: "Will you help me correct the violation?" "Not I,"...
  • French to Send Surrender Advisors to Iraq

    02/11/2003 10:25:32 AM PST · by SAMWolf · 85 replies · 53+ views
    BrokenNewz ^ | 12/10/2002 | William Grim
    Paris - In a stunning reversal of policy, French President Jacques Chirac announced today that the French government will be supporting the War on Terror after all. Five hundred soldiers from the elite L'Abandonnement du Field d'Honneur Battalion (French Surrender Battalion) of the Legion Etrangere (Foreign Legion) are in the process of shipping out to Iraq where they will assist the elite Iraqi Republican Guards in their inevitable surrender to the overwhelming might of the American Armed Forces. "Eet ees important to be haughty and insufferable when surrendering," said General Philippe de Peepee, the Commanding Officer of the Surrender Battalion,...
  • FRENCH DISSING IN THE U.S.A

    03/17/2003 8:08:05 AM PST · by Pokey78 · 46 replies · 423+ views
    Daily Mirror (U.K.) ^ | 03/17/03 | Tony Parsons
    I HOPE that the continent of Europe never again needs help from the United States of America.I hope that there's never some murderous little tyrant - another Hitler, another Milosevic - that Europe needs help in taming.I hope that there's never some economic catastrophe that requires American dollars to make it right, as they did at the end of the Second World War.I hope that the euro experiment works. I hope that all those peace-loving souls in Belgium, Germany and France can somehow muster an army to protect themselves.I hope that the continent I live on never again needs to...
  • Interesting/Funny Japanese Frontline Report: "US Marines In Kuwait Hurl Anti-French Comments"

    03/16/2003 2:31:52 PM PST · by AmericanInTokyo · 36 replies · 323+ views
    Asahi Shimbun News-Tokyo (from Original Japanese) ^ | 17 March 2003 | Asahi Shimbun News (from Original Japanese)
    ASAHI SHIMBUN NEWS WEBSITE STORY IN JAPANESE, MARCH 17, 2003 [ 'FREEPRANSLATED' BY 'AmericanInTokyo" ]I found this to be a humorous and enjoyable (if not realistic) front-line article, appearing in today's Japanese Asahi Shimbun newspaper as written by an unnamed Japanese reporter on-site in Kuwait at an unnamed US Marine camp, interacting with the "frank" and slightly irritated troops.The Japanese reporter offered some interesting comments on what he saw and overheard with respect to the U.S. Marines' thoughts about FRANCE and the FRENCH, who are holding up the Marines' work at- hand to liberate Iraq.Here is the synopsis from...
  • English Sans French

    03/15/2003 3:14:24 PM PST · by John Jorsett · 6 replies · 268+ views
    The Franco-American dispute falling out over the best approach way to disarming Iraq take away Iraq's weapons has resulted in perhaps the highest level of anti-French feeling in the United States Lands since 1763. A French-owned hotel innkeeping firm, Accor, has taken down the tricolor three-hued flag. In the House of Representatives Burghers, the chairman leader of the Committee Body on Administration Running Things has renamed named anew French fries "freedom fries" and French toast "freedom toast" in House restaurants eating rooms.To which the question asking arises: Why stop with Evian, Total gasoline, and the Concorde (just only the Air...
  • France Demands Return of the Statue of Liberty

    03/15/2003 11:12:40 AM PST · by Rebelbase · 107 replies · 579+ views
    bbspotnews ^ | 3/13/03 | Brian Briggs
    Paris - France has invoked a long forgotten clause to demand that the Statue of Liberty be returned. The people of France sent Lady Liberty as a gift to the people of the United States in 1886, but the recent row between the countries over Iraq has them rethinking their present. A graduate student in history, Jean Renault, at the École Centrale Paris uncovered a document which gives France the right to recall the gift under certain conditions. "It says right here," said Renault pointing to the aged document, "that if America drops below a certain level on the Franklin...