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Posts by L.N. Smithee

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  • Tell General He Should Put A Sock In It (Hurl Alert!!!

    10/06/2009 2:35:33 AM PDT · 69 of 72
    L.N. Smithee to ajwharton
    Wasn’t Eugene the genius that told us that the folks in the Superdome were eating each other?

    No, that was Randall Robinson, author of the bestseller The Debt, which made the case for reparations.

    As a black man, the worst part of Randall Robinson's forwarding that false rumor on HuffPo was that HE BELIEVED IT. He thought his fellow African-Americans were so ignorant they would take to eating their dead neighbors rather than continue to wait for relief that was inexcusably delayed, but nonetheless guaranteed to be on its way.

  • LETTERMAN'S OFFICE SQUEEZE ISN'T FUNNY EITHER

    10/05/2009 11:07:44 PM PDT · 11 of 11
    L.N. Smithee to Oztrich Boy
    Tip for today. When you're in a hole, stop digging. "Smitty" is Stephanie Birkitt.

    Whoa, there's a lotta attitude coming from Down Under. Forgive me for having forgotten over the last four years all the unfunny schtuff I left behind when I stopped watching Letterman on a regular basis.

    Whatsamatter, you think Dave's a laff riot and Birkett is the new Lily Tomlin or something?

  • LETTERMAN'S OFFICE SQUEEZE ISN'T FUNNY EITHER

    10/05/2009 5:59:37 PM PDT · 8 of 11
    L.N. Smithee to Oztrich Boy
    Wow, you became aware of Birkitt's character in 2005 (do you know Michael Jackson is still dead?). Smitty was appearing on The Late Show years before that time

    Are you referring to Barbara Gaines, now the Executive Producer? She's a lesbian. Whether she was "out" going back to her days on the NBC show, I don't know, but I do know this: In June, before any details of actual sexual intercourse between Dave and his staffettes emerged, I remembered for the record Letterman groping Gaines on-camera.


    Strange you should say that, because I vividly remember back in the NBC days how Letterman did EXACTLY that on camera.

    Dave used to do a bit in which he would call people at random from the White Pages from across the country (that's how he found Arnie Barnes, a "meat shaper" working at Omaha Steaks). Given the task of bringing the phone directories to his desk was Barbara Gaines, a production assistant. Gaines would enter from stage left and put the phone books on Dave's desk. As she would bend over and flip the pages and place her finger on a person selected to be called, a grinning Dave, while making idle chit-chat, would slowly reach behind her with his left hand. She would flinch and giggle and playfully say "C'mon!" or something.

    At the time, Letterman was widely known to be dating writer Merrill Markoe, so it struck me as odd that he would be goosing a staff member on camera. Years later, Gaines, who eventually became Executive Producer, came out of the closet, making it more mysterious. Nevertheless, it happened that way, and wish I had video to prove it.


  • LETTERMAN'S OFFICE SQUEEZE ISN'T FUNNY EITHER

    10/05/2009 4:25:49 PM PDT · 1 of 11
    L.N. Smithee
    More video and analysis at L.N. Smithee's REACTOR at LNSmitheeBlog.Blogspot.com
  • Wimbledon Girls Are 'Just There To Sell Sex', Says BBC Pundit Michael Stich

    06/28/2009 9:25:58 PM PDT · 50 of 50
    L.N. Smithee to Steelfish
    The 40-year-old German said the noise detracted from the players’ ‘sex appeal’.

    He said: ‘Just play it back to the women. It sounds disgusting, ugly, unsexy!’

    What gets me about the grunting is that it is, IMHO, counterproductive. I don't know what it is that these players were taught the grunting does to help them; if it has any benefit making a loud sound when you make contact, why don't other elite athletes scream? Does Tiger go "Hharrhgh!" when he hits a tee shot? Does Ryan Howard go "Aaarrhee!" when he swings for the fences?

    Also, it actually saps energy they need late in matches. If you've ever had an illness that causes loud sneezing or coughing fits, you know how tiring it is to cause that much sound to come out of your body. I'll never forget watching Maria Sharapova as she ran out of gas in a tiebreaker in a three-set match. She could barely get the grunts out, and I thought, "I'll bet she wishes she had stopped earlier in the match!"

    BTW, I hadn't thought about Michael Stich since...well, since he won. He's a one-hit wonder, the Slim Whitman of tennis.

  • Froomkin out at Washington Post (Updated)

    06/18/2009 6:04:13 PM PDT · 14 of 14
    L.N. Smithee to Scheneida
    It couldn't have happened to a hackier hack. I decimate the deceiver in this 2005 thread.

    My only question is, will his vacuum be filled by something even more hacktastic?

  • Olbermann Lies About Free Republic on MSNBC

    06/18/2009 5:46:55 PM PDT · 109 of 114
    L.N. Smithee to mnehring; kristinn
    Von Brunn himself posted on the Republican Web site, Free Republic, spouting the right-wing claim that Obama‘s birth certificate was forged,

    I believe there is something askew about Obama's original Certification of Live Birth, which has (contrary to popular belief) NEVER been released. There is NOT a single reason not to release the original if it is on the up-and-up. NONE.

    defending President Bush against Dan Rather,

    Hey, Keith, why do you think Dan Rather is working for peanuts for Mark Cuban on a cable channel with even fewer viewers than MSNBC? Because the legendary old school newsman Rather, whom America first got to know when he covered Kennedy's assassination live in Dallas, tried to fix the 2004 election and got caught BY FREEPERS and retired a disgrace!

    Don't think that can't happen to you too, Keith.

    and claiming the media had tried to destroy Sarah Palin.

    YOU TRY TO DESTROY PALIN EVERY MADDOG CHANCE YOU GET! You trashed her earlier in this rant! Dude, do you immediately forget every word you say after you read it off your 'prompter?

    This reminds me of the way Margaret Cho tried to slime FR (after some individuals clicking over to her site from here admittedly were cruel and abusive toward her) by referencing the failed attempt by Stormfront members to "[P]enetrate Free Republic." We sniffed that plot out and banned the neo-Nazi trolls, but Cho's webmaster referred to one of the plotters' writing that FR was "packed full of our target audience."

    How nice it is to know that while President "New Kind of Politics" Obama is firing inspectors general for false reasons and breaking a law he co-sponsored as a Senator in the process, the Huffington Post and the producers of Countdown have their priorities straight: Slandering Free Republic through guilt-by-association arguments that fall apart under scrutiny.

    Let me interject at this point that I am a black man.

  • OMG! Nightline is Biased!

    04/29/2009 11:04:08 PM PDT · 23 of 31
    L.N. Smithee to maclogo
    Nightline began life as America Held Hostage, a nightly update on the the Iran hostage crisis during the Carter administration. Ever since the hostages were released on the day Ronald Reagan was inaugurated, there has been ever-so-slightly biased leftward under the anchorage of Ted Koppel. Still, Koppel was the most respectable and respectful anchor on television.

    When Koppel retired, and former BBC reporter Martin Bashir joined unrestrained ABC lefties Terry Moran (from out of the WH Press Corps) and fluffmistress Cynthia McFadden from 20/20 as rotating anchors, it's been a GOP gang-bash.

    I follow Moran on Twitter, and while he seems to be a very devoted and spiritual family man, his contempt for right-wingers is obvious to anyone who pays attention to the way he puts things. Still, he's not the most biased reporter who tweets; if you want a howl, follow CNN's Rick Sanchez, an moron who thinks he's a genius, ABC's Michelle Obama suckup Yunji De Nies, or the vacuous vision known as Contessa Brewer of MSNBC.

    OTOH - It used to be I couldn't stand ABC's Jake Tapper, who gave biased coverage during the Fla. recount and took Moran's place in the WH Press Corps. But he's been great, asking probing questions of Obama to the point that BHO recently dodged him, and stymieing the stammering, giggling Robert Gibbs on a regular basis.

  • Twelve Major Brands That Will Disappear

    04/20/2009 1:01:54 AM PDT · 21 of 87
    L.N. Smithee to FromLori

    I was surprised to see Palm on the list. I thought it was already dead and buried. Remember those ads and billboards with the naked woman that were controversial in the late nineties?

  • Wiretap Recorded Rep. Harman Promising to Intervene for AIPAC

    04/20/2009 1:00:33 AM PDT · 12 of 24
    L.N. Smithee to Lorianne

    Oops, sorry. Wrong thread. Never miiind.

  • Twelve Major Brands That Will Disappear

    04/20/2009 12:58:59 AM PDT · 19 of 87
    L.N. Smithee to this_ol_patriot
    I have bought from eBay a couple of dozen times over the years and have had absolutely zero problems that weren't resolved with a week. The only trouble was when an electronic item I won with a bid less than two dollars had a $80 shipping charge FOB from Hong Kong. I fought that and the seller backed down. No probs since then.

    I wouldn't worry about eBay if I were you. It ain't Craigslist, with pervs, scammers, and killers just a click away.

  • Wiretap Recorded Rep. Harman Promising to Intervene for AIPAC

    04/20/2009 12:52:11 AM PDT · 11 of 24
    L.N. Smithee to Lorianne

    I was surprised to see Palm on the list. I thought it was already dead and buried. Remember those ads and billboards with the naked woman that were controversial in the late nineties?

  • Wiretap Recorded Rep. Harman Promising to Intervene for AIPAC

    04/20/2009 12:35:46 AM PDT · 6 of 24
    L.N. Smithee to bossmechanic
    I’m not an Israel supportor nor am I against their need for a secure nation. However, they have done no good spying on the United States. And I don’t forgive them easily for that. So don’t get sympathetic on their behalf and expect me to go along.

    What are you talking about?

  • Twelve Major Brands That Will Disappear

    04/20/2009 12:31:39 AM PDT · 16 of 87
    L.N. Smithee to Yaelle
    I hope Crocs stays. Great cheap indestructible shoes that never smell. if you don’t like them for adults, they are still wonderful for children. Even the world over, they could provide cheap indestructible footwear for poor children.

    Meanwhile, even in this crappy economy, there are people who are spending $215 and up on butt-ugly sneakers only because they were designed by Kanye West.

  • Twelve Major Brands That Will Disappear

    04/20/2009 12:19:58 AM PDT · 15 of 87
    L.N. Smithee to dr_lew
    Borders! Yikes! This is hitting home. I was just there tonight, but you know, you can see how the internet spoils you. You look at their DVD database for, oh, say DJANGO, and you see order ... order ... order. Why go to the store?

    As hard as it is to stomach the condescension of bookstore employees who are almost exclusively liberal, I enjoy browsing in bookstores. Stacey's, a large, beautiful independent bookstore in downtown San Francisco that I used to frequent on my lunch breaks, suddenly disappeared after 85 years. It was heartbreaking riding by on a bus for the first time in weeks and seeing the banners screaming that fixtures were for sale.

    Borders is all there is left in San Francisco with easy parking (Barnes & Noble is at Fisherman's Wharf).

    It still ticks me off the way libs demonize Wal-Mart, saying that it kills downtown businesses. There may be a kernel of truth in that, but Amazon.com is slowly murdering the entire retail book industry. Forget mom-and-pop stores, whole chains are going south. Any anti-corporate union-thug types boycotting it? Anybody? Anybody? Bueller?

  • Wiretap Recorded Rep. Harman Promising to Intervene for AIPAC

    04/19/2009 11:57:29 PM PDT · 3 of 24
    L.N. Smithee to bossmechanic
    I don't know what being a "birther" has to do with any of this, but this is more than just political horse-trading a la Blagojevich. Harman allegedly wanted to make a deal to boost her own intelligence bonafides at the expense of national security; remember, espionage charges are involved.

    The funny thing is that whatever is the full truth of Harman's gambit, it failed. She was passed over in favor of the gaffetastic Silvestre Reyes, who would be a national punch line if he was a white Republican.

    Israel is already a U.S. ally, so I am mystified that there are so many spy cases on its behalf.

  • Diane Sawyer rigs mass shooting experiment on 20/20

    04/15/2009 4:59:07 AM PDT · 9 of 34
    L.N. Smithee to marktwain
    The shooter knew there was an armed student in the classroom. This is a big error in the experiment. What mass shooter would enter a room where he knew there was someone with a gun to shoot back?

    The shooter shot the lecturer first, then turned directly to the young man and began firing. How convenient it was for the shooter to know who was armed and where he was sitting so he could quickly take out the one and only threat in the room.

    The shooter knew he could be fired at, but showed no surprise at the sight of a gun. The experiment was repeated with other "victims" under the same circumstances and not once did the shooter react in surprise. In real life, a shooter won't expect any resistance and is likely to react when shot at. The shooter was a professional firearm instructor and a good shot under stress. Not exactly realistic, since real mass murderers are usually just insane people with guns.

    In other words, this experiment was rigged. The armed student was set up to fail.

    I knew from the first promo that it would be a blatantly unbalanced piece (I've seen that footage of the kids pointing the empty guns at each other and staring down the barrel before), but I was not prepared for the way the subjects were set up like bowling pins in that "live" demonstration.

    The author of the article failed to note that the shooter in the demonstrations knew exactly which of the people in the room were going to attempt to shoot back; with the exception of one volunteer and one other designated person seated in the conference room, all the others were law enforcement officers whose instructions were to take cover rather than attempt to engage the shooter. On top of that, when one of the volunteers landed a round on the shooter's left arm, it was minimized: 'It was just a graze. You're supposed to be shooting at the head...'

    At the end, Sawyer said she really, really wished she could have had an opposing point of view, but that they couldn't find any that weren't contradictory. Unbelievable (in every sense of the word).

  • Fox's Van Susteren Vulnerable to Beck's Success, Palin Ties

    04/02/2009 11:14:28 AM PDT · 79 of 142
    L.N. Smithee to lewisglad
    Van Susteren's ratings are getting smashed by Beck, whose show, despite airing in the ghetto that is 5 p.m., is already the network's third-highest-rated program.

    That's as dumb as saying "Red Eye's ratings are getting smashed by The O'Reilly Factor." They're all on the same network, butthead!

    Van Susteren's ratings aren't being threatened by her direct competition, and with market share trends increasing FNC's viewership (partially due to Beck catching fire), Ailes would be a maddog fool to mess with success -- especially with the competition doubling down on wacko left w/Ed Schultz!

    Don't be fooled, people -- this is just part of the left's anti-Palin blitz. Why do you think the article's lead was about Palin and not Van Susteren's ratings?

  • The "October Surprise" - a lttle early

    02/11/2009 3:57:41 AM PST · 124 of 130
    L.N. Smithee to Lancey Howard
  • Calif. Supreme Court Could Strike Down Prop 8

    02/04/2009 1:24:55 AM PST · 25 of 53
    L.N. Smithee to nickcarraway
    Brown told the court in a filing that he doesn't think that Proposition 8 is a constitutional revision or that it violates the constitutional separate of powers. But he said he believes it is unconstitutional because it violates the inalienable right to liberty.

    Moonbeam Brown knew exactly what it was when the Gay-stapo demanded that he change the language the title from “California Limits to Marriage Amendment” to “Elimination of the Right of Same-Sex Couples to Marry." He just thought that change would kill it.

    This is dereliction of duty by the Attorney General, who is supposed to represent The People of the State of California. The People have spoken, but Brown -- even in rejecting the supposed best argument against Prop 8 -- is still ignoring the electorate, just like his predecessor. The only reason why the whole question of legality of same-sex marriage made it to the California Supreme Court last year is because the last AG, Democrat Bill Lockyer, sent an CA Appeals court invalidation of Gavin Newsom's rogue marriages to the Supremes for review. They did just what Lockyer wanted -- they overturned it, and created a right to same-sex marriage from whole cloth.

    And you Weiner Nation fans, don't ever forget -- this whole deal is partly HIS fault. Savage sent Brown's AG campaign $5,600.00 and blew off conservative Republican candidate Chuck Poochigian.

  • Obama Picks Porn Lawyer for #2 at Justice (Fidelis Press Release)

    02/03/2009 2:09:54 PM PST · 38 of 62
    L.N. Smithee to markedmannerf
    Obama must have mistaken David Ogden for David Ogden Stiers, who played Major Charles Emerson Winchester III on M*A*S*H.

    Stiers donated to John Edwards in 2008, Howard Dean and John Kerry in 2004, and has also sent money to socialist Bernie Sanders and the late Paul Wellstone.

    Why Obama got none of his dough is a mystery. Maybe he couldn't in good conscience support such a newbie.

  • Obama using Net to lobby for stimulus package

    02/03/2009 1:54:53 PM PST · 8 of 8
    L.N. Smithee to markomalley
  • 2009 Superbowl Commercials, 10 best and 10 worst

    02/02/2009 6:08:44 PM PST · 17 of 18
    L.N. Smithee to TheRealDBear
    The Teleflora ad was the worst, absolutely mean with no point at all.

    The point was to contrast flowers delivered in a box with flowers brought to the recipient in a vase, which was the product they were promoting. And while the last joke was indeed juvenile, I DID laugh.

  • Dan Rooney's Obama Worship

    02/02/2009 3:00:33 PM PST · 50 of 50
    L.N. Smithee to griswold3
    I was watching when Rooney accepted the trophy. I have been trying to control my Obamabot Inspired Tourette's Syndrome, but lost it when Rooney thanked Obama.

    Kurt Warner would have thanked his Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. Well, to each his own messiah.

  • Obama: Robert E. Lee'd be 'very confused'

    02/02/2009 2:51:33 AM PST · 48 of 222
    L.N. Smithee to Darkwolf377
    There are ENDLESS things to complain about regarding Obama, but he is, like it or not, a black man. Black people have no reason--none--to respect Robert E. Lee.

    OK, let me try this again, because you obviously have monitor problems and couldn't read what I wrote the first time: What I posted doesn't have anything to do with defending the South or Robert E. Lee. GOT IT?

    If a white man at an event commemorating MLK were to say "Wouldn't he be surprised to see me, a white guy, here" the same people would be saying "Oh, lighten up, it's a joke."

    What? That joke wouldn't even make sense, because there was no dearth of white people who supported Dr. King. I'll tell you what's NOT a joke -- the way the Dems, led by their own "permanent campaign" guru David Axelrod, is trying to create the notion that conservatives are all either Southern racists or racists who wish they were Southern. That's why they keep on bringing up race apropos of nothing after insisting that Obama was a post-racial candidate -- the race card is too powerful a weapon for them to keep in their holster.

    This sure teaches me to bother discussing reality with a certain strain of folks on FR.

    Dude, you're the one who can't face the reality about Lincoln. You can't handle the truth, so you make up schtuff about my motivations. Well, that's your problem, not mine.

  • Obama: Robert E. Lee'd be 'very confused'

    02/02/2009 2:09:53 AM PST · 43 of 222
    L.N. Smithee to Darkwolf377
    Whenever someone criticizes Southern racists, instead of proving the charge is false (which in this case it’s not), the defenders of the person always dig up some quotes about Lincoln.

    I didn't "dig up quotes about Lincoln," I quoted Lincoln.

    Of course, they ignore the little action Lincoln took which freed the slaves, but that’s just a technicality. I don’t see any such actions Lee took.

    My point is that Obama was acting as if Lee was unique in his feelings about blacks. Any confusion that Lee had about blacks being present at his birthday party and being presided over by a black President would have been matched by Lincoln's confusion, because neither foresaw the day when blacks would be treated as citizens with voting rights in an integrated America.

    Common myths about Lincoln's feelings about blacks are still perpetuated by both parties so each may claim his lofty mantle at their convenience. Obama, whose campaign strategy was to convince the gullible and under-educated shares of the electorate that the nation's history is all just a prelude to his candidacy, continues to cast himself as the recipient of Lincoln's legacy; he's sending the message that what the Great Emancipator began is what he's bound to finish. He invoked Lincoln when he announced his campaign in Springfield, Illinois. He's used the Lincoln Memorial as a backdrop for speeches and concerts. He says he's reading about Lincoln for guidance on his cabinet appointments. Whatta crock!

    Lincoln, as you read if you clicked on my link, not only would have laughed at the notion that there could be a black President even almost a century and a half after his death, he also would have been horrified at the idea that said President came from a mixed marriage.

    What I posted doesn't have anything to do with defending the South or Robert E. Lee. I was born in San Francisco, where I still live -- unreconstructed Southerners around here could fill a phone booth. And let me interject at this point that I am a black man.

  • 2009 Superbowl Commercials, 10 best and 10 worst

    02/02/2009 1:22:43 AM PST · 11 of 18
    L.N. Smithee to exist
    I laughed almost all the way through the Pepsi MacGruber commercial.

    I already knew what was going to happen in the "PepSuber" commercial. I watched Saturday Night Live when Sarah Palin was on -- I haven't watched it since and hadn't for years previous -- and saw that "MacGruber" shtick. A little bit amusing the first time they blew up. The fourth time? I was wondering if SNL writers were back to snorting cocaine, like in the Franken era.

    This was NOT a good year for commercials. I only laughed a few times; The Bridgestone commercial with Mrs. Potato Head losing her lips; the Denny's Grand Slam commercial with the cheery waitress interrupting the mobsters; the Teleflora bit with the talking flowers; the Hyundai spot with the German and Japanese car bosses; the Doritos crystal ball bit.

    The E-Trade bit with the black kid singing "Broken Wings" was good for a few titters. Speaking of titters, the GoDaddy "Enhancement Hearing" commercial is a clever and original satire of the House hearing on steroid use in baseball. It's better online than the short, censored thirty-second version. The one with Danica Patrick and the blonde chick in the shower is just dumb. BTW, don't be fooled -- there is no frontal nudity in the online version of either commercial.

    The blonde girl in the Taco Bell ad is gorgeous. She deserves better than a guy who means fast food enchiladas when he says "dinner." The ballyhooed Coke Zero bit was OK, but Troy Polamalu is a terrible actor. It was a bad year for the Clydesdales -- nothing matching the Rocky-themed spot of last year. In the Audi commercial, I wondered why the guy running for his life didn't even bother to jump into a Lexus with the motor running. Maybe car enthusiasts can explain that to me.

    Ads I hated: I almost threw my remote at the screen when I saw Pepsi equate will.i.am with Bob Dylan. The "My Generation" one is clever, I must admit. But I'm still boycotting Pepsi until this thinly-veiled Obama crap they're pulling is over. The Castrol ad with the chimps -- ewwww. After side-splitting ads with chimps a few years back, CareerBuilder has stunk up the joint for two years straight. And I didn't appreciate the Doritos commercial in which a guy turned a police officer into a monkey. The SoBe lizards were stupid, and so were the guys in the leotards -- 3-D didn't make a bad idea better. Whoever conceived those GE "ecoimagination" spots stole every cent they were paid. The ending of the Cars.com ad with the boy genius seemed like it was edited minutes before broadcast -- talk about a flat ending. And Hulu.com with Alec Baldwin; yeah, he's a slimy reptile all right.

  • Obama: Robert E. Lee'd be 'very confused'

    02/02/2009 12:22:54 AM PST · 31 of 222
    L.N. Smithee to Darkwolf377
    He has a point. If Palin's going to say something like she did--which I applauded her for--what is she doing at this event--to show it's "all just politics"? I thought she was supposed to be different.

    Get some perspective. Palin didn't have much respect for the state government in Juneau, AK either, but she nevertheless became part of the system before she won the race to run it.

    There is a difference between stating the reasons why your party is more fit to run the United States and disrespecting the President. We've seen the Dems do that for the last eight years, and some, like Conyers, Reid, Waxman, and Pelosi, can't kick the habit. Palin is made of classier stuff, and she proves it everyday despite the slime thrown her way.

    Notice that despite Obama's joke aimed at Palin about "palling around," he's never fully addressed the issue of Ayers and Dohrn, and thanks to the MSM, he probably never will.

  • Obama: Robert E. Lee'd be 'very confused'

    02/02/2009 12:03:57 AM PST · 27 of 222
    L.N. Smithee to Darkwolf377
    Lee would indeed be confused by a black president. He was a slaveowner, and while he said he would be willing to have blacks in the Confederate Army, he also said their subjugation as slaves was “necessary”... I mean, let’s not be ridiculous. What Obama said was correct. We do ourselves no service by picking on every little word. Confused? You bet he’d be.

    Abraham Lincoln would have been confused, too.

    Here's Abe being his honest self in the fourth debate with Stephen Douglas, September 18, 1858 (bold mine):


    I will say then that I am not, nor ever have been in favor of bringing about in any way the social and political equality of the white and black races, [applause]---that I am not nor ever have been in favor of making voters or jurors of negroes, nor of qualifying them to hold office, nor to intermarry with white people; and I will say in addition to this that there is a physical difference between the white and black races which I believe will for ever forbid the two races living together on terms of social and political equality. And inasmuch as they cannot so live, while they do remain together there must be the position of superior and inferior, and I as much as any other man am in favor of having the superior position assigned to the white race. I say upon this occasion I do not perceive that because the white man is to have the superior position the negro should be denied everything.

    (snip)

    Now my opinion is that the different States have the power to make a negro a citizen under the Constitution of the United States if they choose. The Dred Scott decision decides that they have not that power. If the State of Illinois had that power I should be opposed to the exercise of it. [Cries of "good,'' "good,'' and applause.] That is all I have to say about it.


    When I was still in my single digits, I learned that the Great Emancipator wasn't color blind, but not at school -- from the TV dramedy Room 222. A black militant student wrote a report with such quotes from Lincoln and illustrated them with a drawing of Abe walking over chained slaves.
  • Ahmadinejad vs. Coca Cola (Boycott Coke; Drink Mecca Cola, Zam Zam, Sassan Instead)

    01/28/2009 5:50:50 PM PST · 8 of 8
    L.N. Smithee to Edit35
    I’m already not buying Pepsi for their slobbering support of Obama during the inauguration-coronation.

    Me too. It's bad enough to have to look at the maddog Obama bumperstickers all over -- on top of that, we have the Pepsi billboards all over that are half advertisement and half celebration of Obama's election.

    Pepsi knew that it ran the risk of offending 48% of the population in going forward with their "Refresh Everything" crap. They asked for it, they're getting it. No Pepsi pour moi until this campaign ends.

  • Obama's vindication of Tom Paine [strong stomachs only]

    01/28/2009 5:27:39 PM PST · 4 of 8
    L.N. Smithee to SJackson
    Barack Obama was wise to associate himself with the better angels of our history, including the architects of our republic.

    So what is the point? That Obama should be lauded for refusing to pull out a painting of the founders at the Continental Congress after taking the oath, and then crap on it?

  • Obama's vindication of Tom Paine [strong stomachs only]

    01/28/2009 5:20:18 PM PST · 2 of 8
    L.N. Smithee to SJackson
    The American experiment began with its promise constricted by the narrow vision of Virginia plantation owners who saw an African-American as three-fifths of a human being -- and that scant measure only for the purpose of granting the South a greater share of the seats in Congress.

    WHAAAT?!

    Omigawd...If it were up to the opponents of slavery, slaves would have NOT been counted as human beings AT ALL -- the "three-fifths" was a compromise between the anti-slavery states, who only wanted to count free citizens, and the slave states, who WANTED to count citizens AND the slaves as part of the population for apportionment purposes!

    Once again, ignorance plays into the hands of leftists!

  • QUESTION O-THORITY

    01/28/2009 4:53:09 PM PST · 19 of 24
    L.N. Smithee to holdonnow

    Keep up the EXCELLENT work.

  • QUESTION O-THORITY

    01/28/2009 4:51:51 PM PST · 18 of 24
    L.N. Smithee to an amused spectator; muawiyah

    OK, it's up on Flickr now. Hopefully, it will stay up at this URL: http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3345/3234707673_26c5b42fe2.jpg?v=0

    By the way, spectator, you are free to use it and reproduce it.

  • Is it time to dump Free Republic?

    01/28/2009 3:13:23 PM PST · 376 of 404
    L.N. Smithee to PlainOleAmerican
    This has been a complaint of mine for awhile.

    I have thoughtfully and carefully researched things that I have put on my blog and cross-posted here, only to have it sent to the "Bloggers & Personal" ghetto where it languished unnoticed. At the same time, someone else has put a vanity thread complaining about something Shepard Smith said a few minutes ago, and the mods let it stay in "News/Activism," garnering thousands of hits and 200+ responses.

    I have FReepmailed the Mods about it and gotten no responses. It's one of the reasons why after TEN years as a registered Freeper, I spend most of my online time on Patterico's Pontifications and Michelle Malkin.com. Even though I can't post, at least I know my comments will be read there (and I don't have to type out my own HTML tags).

  • QUESTION O-THORITY

    01/27/2009 7:04:36 PM PST · 6 of 24
    L.N. Smithee to All; Admin Moderator
    Doggone it, the graphic is vanishing again.

    Here's a link in case you can't see it.

    It should be below. If that fails, click on my blog link above.

  • QUESTION O-THORITY

    01/27/2009 7:00:36 PM PST · 5 of 24
    L.N. Smithee to Jubal Madison

    Thanks, Madison. Everyone is smarter for having read your post. :)

  • QUESTION O-THORITY

    01/27/2009 6:29:49 PM PST · 1 of 24
    L.N. Smithee
  • 'Villages' Retirement Home is Widower's Sex Paradise

    01/26/2009 7:04:54 AM PST · 64 of 100
    L.N. Smithee to Owl_Eagle
    I was watching the Geico commercial this weekend, from that new campaign that doesn't make any sense - with the pile of dollars with the eyes on top? Anyways, the one where the older couple is in the Chinese restaurant. I'd probably hit it with that red headed chick, and she's gotta be in her sixties.

    I dig her too. She's got a glamorous bad girl smolder in her smile from the 60's romantic comedies. She reminds me of the megahot actress Christina Hendricks, who plays the buxom secretary Joan Holloway on Mad Men. Hendricks is only 23, but looks older because of the makeup and styles of the era.

    In this world where young women deface their skin with tattoos, stuff themselves into jeans too small for their butts and proudly display midriffs that should never be bare, I always appreciate old-school femininity.

    I've always liked older women. I'm in my forties, and still treasure every look I get from older women with snow on the roof but fire in the furnace. Anyone else who got the tinglies about Louise Sorel?

  • The Worst Pop Singer Ever. Why, exactly, is Billy Joel so bad?

    01/25/2009 1:41:50 AM PST · 123 of 374
    L.N. Smithee to Lizavetta
    Jackson Browne and John Cougar Mellendingle or whatever the hell his name is.....now, they suck.

    I am not a fan of either's politics (I can't believe that almost thirty years of safety after Three Mile Island, Browne's still against nuclear energy), but they have had their shining moments.

    Mellencamp's breakthrough Cougar-era track "I Need a Lover" is IMHO one of the greatest pop-rock songs ever (the album cut has the terrific intro). Magnificent drumming. And what lonely man hasn't dreamed of "some woman to thrill me, and then go away"? (Remember, this was written at least fifteen years before AOL.) Jackson Browne's "Running On Empty" was my favorite all-time song for years, and to think that was a live recording.

    Where is David Lindley nowadays? He is missed.

  • The Worst Pop Singer Ever. Why, exactly, is Billy Joel so bad?

    01/25/2009 12:48:12 AM PST · 120 of 374
    L.N. Smithee to null and void
    Only to people who have never heard Woody Guthrie

    I still remember my U.S. History class when we were shown a film about Woody Guthrie and his protest songs. My deskmates and I stared at each other in amazement. Absolutely BRUTAL. There are people who have been laughed off American Idol auditions that could outsing Woody Guthrie with socks in their mouths.

  • The Worst Pop Singer Ever. Why, exactly, is Billy Joel so bad?

    01/25/2009 12:35:50 AM PST · 118 of 374
    L.N. Smithee to SeekAndFind
    Billy Joel?! Eh, shaddup. With the sad state of pop music in the 21st Century, nobody should be reaching back over two decades to call a legendary singer-songwriter-musician "the worst."

    Wake up, idiot: There is a real possibility that the big winner in this year's Grammy Awards will be the execrable Li'l Wayne. That would be worse than the Dixie Chicks winning. It would be a sign of the Apocalypse.

    There is help on the way, though. While the Jonas Brothers are superstars, there are two legitimately talented rock groups made up of teens: Tokio Hotel and Crooked X. While neither is Led Zeppelin (or even Def Leppard) yet, unlike the Jonases, you can't tell they aren't old enough to shave just by listening to them.

  • Colin Powell: The America We Remember is Back Again (triple bag barf alert)

    01/20/2009 6:17:00 PM PST · 68 of 80
    L.N. Smithee to lewisglad
    I'm still waiting for Powell to provide one substantive sentence since he left the Bush Administration. Let's see if he can muster up something that isn't meaningless:
    "I think it has really, really been an remarkable event in terms of getting everybody to stand back and say, look at what we have seen here in America," Powell said. "The America we remember is back again."
    STEEERIKE ONE!
    "I am surprised," Powell said. "I am deeply pleased it happened in my lifetime. He did sort of come out of nowhere. But he came out of nowhere with a sense of optimism, self-confidence, but not overconfidence, and a belief in the basic ideals of this country. What he did was ran a campaign that was almost a military operation in terms of its efficiency, and it's dogged determination to achieve a goal, and he said to all Americans, let's come together, as he says so often. It is not a red state or a blue state, but we're all in one country. And he touched the American people at a time when the American people wanted to be touched, and they needed to be touched. They needed to be reminded of what this country stands for."
    STEEEERIKE TWO!
    "We have a man who happens to be an African-American, but beyond that, he is a qualified, capable, transformational figure – that's why we elected him," Powell said. "The fact he is African-American says so much about who we are as a people, as a country. It has energized the country and energized the world. Parades the night of the election, not only in Chicago and New York, but in Rio, in Berlin, in Obama, Japan -- there is such a place. They're building a statue in it for him already. The world wondered, can America really do this? Aren't they too divided? Can they really pull something like this off? And we said to the world, yes, we can, and we did."
    STEEERIKE THREE!

    On this day in 2000, I cringed at the idea of listening to George W. Bush -- the worst public speaking Chief Executive in the history of recorded sound -- for four years. Given the alternative, I was relieved (but not happy) about having to listen to him for an additional four. Now, I've got a different problem; people who know how to speak well, but refuse to say anything that isn't, at its core, pliable and meaningless.

  • Inauguration Watch [Live Thread]

    01/20/2009 9:46:33 AM PST · 1,466 of 2,503
    L.N. Smithee to Vermont Lt
    Each according to their skills, to each according to their needs....or something like that. Gotta dust off the red beret.

    Which raises the question of who that guy in the red fedora was standing on the aisle to the right of the people descending the stairs. It was like product placement for RedHat Linux.

  • Inauguration Watch [Live Thread]

    01/20/2009 9:34:11 AM PST · 1,318 of 2,503
    L.N. Smithee to Squidpup
    poem... say what? huh? If you speek with a ...halting... voice... its ...a... poem

    Mark my words -- in lieu of lampooning Obama -- which the comedy luminaries can't bring themselves to do yet -- SNL will go after that ridiculous poem.

  • Inauguration Watch [Live Thread]

    01/20/2009 9:31:05 AM PST · 1,272 of 2,503
    L.N. Smithee to kinsman redeemer

    Holy crap! This poem is brutal!

    I never thought I would miss Maya Angelou!

  • Could Nancy Pelosi be our next President?

    11/18/2008 12:32:25 AM PST · 41 of 68
    L.N. Smithee to Exton1

    There aren’t too many people I would choose Obama over. Pelosi is one of them. If she switched her affiliation from D to R overnight, people would admit she makes Sarah Palin look like Marie Curie.

  • Cindy Sheehanís congressional bid (she beat the GOP candidate to come in 2nd!)

    11/12/2008 10:58:21 PM PST · 20 of 25
    L.N. Smithee to 2ndDivisionVet
    Wow! With some more money, Mother Moonbat might've given San Fran Nan a real run for her money. Wouldn't that have been hilarious?!!

    Don't kid yourself. Pelosi had previously never gotten less than 75% of the vote in the district, and has never participated in a debate. She didn't even campaign. Sheehan just peeled away the Code Pinkos. They get attention wherever they strip down to their puke-colored gowns, but there aren't a lot of them. Electorally, they're insignificant.

    Remember when Chris Matthews told Sheehan she should run for Congress?

  • Rock legend Mitch Mitchell dies aged 61

    11/12/2008 10:42:39 PM PST · 6 of 15
    L.N. Smithee to the scotsman

    I’ve frankly not thought much about who was drumming for Jimi. Now that I do, that guy was darn good. “Fire” and “Crosstown Traffic” are what stick out in my mind.

  • MSNBC retracts false Palin story; others duped

    11/12/2008 10:39:00 PM PST · 55 of 105
    L.N. Smithee to SmithL

    If the people at MSNBC have consciences, they will be pricked every time they make mention of the Sarkozy prank call.