Keyword: funny

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  • Saturday Snickers

    12/09/2017 3:52:43 AM PST · by sodpoodle · 6 replies
    email from a friend | 12/9/2017 | unknown
    Let me tell you friends that one simple spelling mistake...even a typo...can make your life hell.   I recently penned a short, Romantic note to my wife while I was away on a fishing trip, and I missed one small "e".  No problem you might say.   Not so!  This tiny error has caused me to seek police protection to enter my own house.   I wrote, "Hi darling, I'm enjoying and experiencing the best time of my whole life, and I wish you were her!”
  • Bored workers attempt to amuse themselves with a series of VERY creative pranks

    12/06/2017 7:40:59 AM PST · by mairdie · 28 replies
    Daily Mail ^ | 6 December 2017 | Emily Chan
    Making it through the working day can feel like a struggle at times. And some bored employees have been trying to make their own fun in a bid to make the day go quicker. Hilarious photographs show workers trying to amuse themselves and others with their extremely creative pranks. While some seemed keen to do as little work as possible, others weren't fussed in putting in the extra effort - all in an attempt to raise a laugh...
  • Women and Estate Planning

    11/29/2017 5:18:46 AM PST · by sodpoodle · 3 replies
    funlovingfreeper | 11/29/2017 | unknown
    My buddy was a single guy living at home with his father and working in the family business. He knew that he would inherit a fortune once his sickly father died. Tom wanted two things: • to learn how to invest his inheritance and, • to find a wife to share his fortune. One evening at an investment meeting, he spotted the most beautiful woman he had ever seen. Her natural beauty took his breath away. “I may look like just an ordinary man,” he said to her, “but in just a few years, my father will die, and I’ll...
  • Dove Regrets Soap Ad Showing Black Woman Turning Into White Woman

    10/09/2017 4:59:23 PM PDT · by Bon mots · 48 replies
    Huffington Post ^ | October 9, 2017 | Rebecca Shapiro
    Dove has removed a Facebook ad that sparked outrage over the weekend for showcasing its body wash alongside a black woman who was shown pulling off her brown T-shirt to reveal a white woman wearing an ivory T-shirt. Screenshots of the ad went viral on social media after makeup artist and model Naomi Leann Blake posted them to her Facebook page on Friday.
  • These male jumping spiders evolved dance moves because the ladies ignore them

    10/05/2017 10:19:05 PM PDT · by nickcarraway · 26 replies
    Popular Science ^ | Sara Chodosh
    This is the cutest that spider mating has ever been.You don’t often feel bad for spiders. But when a fuzzy, black-eyed jumping spider raises his green forearms into the air, wiggles his butt, and flashes his orange knees, only to have a lady spider literally turn around in the middle of his dance...what kind of monster doesn’t feel a pang of empathy? It doesn’t even matter that arachnids are unlikely to experience rejection and angst the way humans do—you feel for the little guy. It’s somehow worse once you know that male jumping spiders evolved this ability specifically to woo...
  • Black Student Group Loses It When They See Actual Africans on Campus

    10/03/2017 8:44:22 AM PDT · by Uncle Sam 911 · 65 replies ^ | 9/30/17 | Ben Arie
    Once in a while, a story comes along that is so ironic it needs this label in bold: “Not satire.” Liberals continue to look more like a parody every day. The progressive farce was just taken to a new level by black students at Cornell University, who are making sweeping demands after they realized that actual Africans from Africa are taking many student positions at the college. Yes, the race-obsessed busybodies at Cornell are in a panic because there is now too much diversity.
  • Joel Osteen Sails Luxury Yacht Through Flooded Houston To Pass Out Copies Of ‘Your Best Life Now’

    08/29/2017 9:37:20 AM PDT · by fungoking · 104 replies
    The Babylon Bee ^ | 8/29/17 | Staff
    <p>HOUSTON, TX—Although Joel Osteen took flak over the weekend for closing up his church to flood victims and all but disappearing during the aftermath of Hurricane Harvey, the megachurch pastor reportedly returned to the city on his luxury yacht “S.S. Blessed” to make amends Tuesday by tossing copies of Your Best Life Now to stranded flood survivors.</p>
  • The Greatest Twitter Account Ever

    08/09/2017 5:40:55 AM PDT · by vannrox · 3 replies
    Taxicabdepressions ^ | 15FEB13 | Editorial staff
    The Greatest Twitter Account EverPosted: 15th February 2013 by Taxi Hack in Uncategorized 1 I was reluctant to get on Twitter… I’m really busy, and I just don’t have time to pay attention to the moronic missives of talentless rappers or some vapid celebutard’s most recent yeast infection. Seriously… if you aren’t banging Kim Kardashian, why would you give a rat’s ass about anything she has to say? But on the other hand, I find that I do like reading the tweets of other hacks… misery loves company, I suppose. But most of all, I enjoy Twitter accounts that...
  • Best video of Dean Martin & Foster Brooks

    07/28/2017 7:48:33 AM PDT · by sodpoodle · 3 replies
    Foster as brain surgeon. Here is an airline pilot.
  • Best Craigslist Ad Evah (Let's take a break Vanity)

    07/18/2017 3:21:58 PM PDT · by Eagles Field · 22 replies
    For sale: one early 80’s Craftsman riding lawn mower with an 11 horse power engine and 30″ mowing deck. Bottom line, this beast is a sick ride! In fact, I’d even say it’s the El Camino of yard whips. Just take a look at those sweet ass rims. So dope they look rented. #arethosedubs? Wait, is that a chicken in the background? Damn straight! Because the Craftsman riding lawn mower was considered the barnyard pimp of its day. Get yer yerrd on, fool! Is it fast? Ever heard of old school 3 on the tree? Well, this whip’s got 8...
  • Just popping out for some milk: Shoppers snap the eccentric characters..(people of walmart)

    07/16/2017 11:18:49 AM PDT · by Morgana · 25 replies
    DAILY MAIL UK ^ | July 16, 2017 | Annabel Fenwick Elliot For
    FULL TITLE: Just popping out for some milk: Shoppers snap the eccentric characters who roam the aisles of their local supermarkets Ah the supermarket aisle: a mundane catwalk of everyday life. But every so often, we come across characters so out of the ordinary that reality is briefly suspended. These images, rounded up from across the world, showcase the shoppers so out-there, they simply had to be captured on camera. In America, the sheer volume of these snaps is so great that a website exists to document them, the wildly popular People of Walmart. Here, MailOnline presents a selection of...
  • New York Times Editors Decry “Humiliating Process” Of Layoffs

    06/28/2017 6:17:07 PM PDT · by Hojczyk · 75 replies
    Dateline Hollywood ^ | June 28,2017 | Jeremy Gerard
    Using words including “betrayal,” “humiliating” and “covfefe” and suggesting that management had compared them to “dogs urinating on fire hydrants,” copy editors at the New York Times today let executive editor Dean Baquet and his heir apparent, Joseph Kahn, know exactly how they feel about taking the brunt of layoffs and buyouts as the Times expands its reporting ranks. The latest flare-up comes at a moment when the Times also is dealing with a libel lawsuit filed by former Vice Presidential candidate Sarah Palin over a Times Op-Ed column erroneously linking her to violent attacks on public figures. In a...
  • TV news vehicle stolen as crew covers local crime wave

    06/26/2017 9:31:31 AM PDT · by ItsOnlyDaryl · 15 replies
    The Extract ^ | 6.25.17 | Editor
    A local television news crew in New Mexico became the story when someone stole the station’s SUV as staffers gathered footage for a segment on crime in the area.
  • Could Illinois Be the First State to Go Bankrupt?

    06/12/2017 2:43:54 PM PDT · by detective · 70 replies
    The Fiscal Times ^ | June 12, 2017 | Eric Pianin
    Illinois has long been the poster child for a dysfunctional state fiscal policy. The state’s Republican governor, a formerly wealthy businessman, and the Democratic-controlled legislature have been perpetually locked in a race to the bottom as the Land of Lincoln has repeatedly flirted with near- bankruptcy and junk-bond level credit ratings.
  • Sunny side UP

    05/28/2017 5:56:42 AM PDT · by sodpoodle · 9 replies
    V.K.Lee | 5/28/2017 | self
    Another,contribution in the plate. ____________________________________ Subject: Medicare Part G Medicare Part G If you are an older senior citizen and can no longer take care of yourself and need Long-Term Care, but the government says there is no Nursing Home care available for you, what do you do? You may opt for Medicare Part G. The plan gives anyone 75 or older a gun (Part G) and one bullet. You may then shoot one worthless politician. This means you will be sent to prison for the rest of your life where you will receive three meals a day, a roof...
  • The Reason Right Wing Memes Are The Most Popular

    04/26/2017 5:26:28 PM PDT · by Bon mots · 16 replies ^ | April 26, 2017 | Joe Bish
    We spoke to the author of 'The Ambivalent Internet' about the rise of the right online. Professor Whitney Phillips, author of This Is Why We Can't Have Nice Things, a book about trolling, has teamed up with Professor Ryan M Milner to pen another book about internet culture. The Ambivalent Internet is about how we express ourselves online, the ways in which we do it, why we do it and how it ends up the way it does. The book was written on the eve of Donald Trump's ascension to the world's highest office, and deals, in part, with the...
  • Giggles for Geezers

    04/24/2017 5:21:46 AM PDT · by sodpoodle · 33 replies
    self | 4/24/2017 | unknown
    GETTING OLDER A distraught senior citizen phoned her doctor's office. "Is it true," she wanted to know, "that the medication you prescribed has to be taken for the rest of my life?" "'Yes, I'm afraid so,"' the doctor told her. There was a moment of silence before the senior lady replied, "I'm wondering, then, just how serious is my condition because this prescription is marked 'NO REFILLS'.." *********************** An older gentleman was on the operating table awaiting surgery and he insisted that his son, a renowned surgeon, perform the operation. As he was about to get the anesthesia, he asked...
  • 5 Huma Abedin Classics You Won’t Want to Miss

    04/16/2017 11:07:46 AM PDT · by kevcol · 17 replies
    Washington Free Beacon ^ | April 13, 2017 | Matthew Walther and Andrew Kugle
    When it was reported recently that Huma Abedin was seeking $2 million for a book advance, you probably didn't realize that she was already a major author with five well-reviewed titles to her credit. While none of us can wait for the next one, here are some paperbacks to tide you over in the meantime.
  • Adorable video shows cats 'training scientist' to bring them food every time they ring a bell

    03/31/2017 6:28:42 AM PDT · by C19fan · 14 replies
    UK Daily Mail ^ | March 31, 2017 | Rod Ardehali
    A pair of kittens 'trained' a human to bring them treats every time they ring a bell. In a twist on the famous Pavlov's Dog experiment, where a canine was conditioned to associate food with the sound of a bell, some Twitter users have suggested in jest that the cats were in fact training the human. The adorable footage shows the two cats pawing at a bell and then given a treat.
  • 50 "Simpsons" One-Liners (trunc)

    03/27/2017 7:32:58 AM PDT · by PeteePie · 34 replies
    BuzzFeed ^ | Mar 21, 2017 | Robin Edds
    Full Header: 50 "Simpsons" One-Liners Guaranteed To Make You Laugh Every Time