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What the heck, let's start with a limerick from my top five. This was the most difficult one to compose that I ever did. Scary choices, on that you can bank To not face them, your Lord you can thank Would you rather be stuck On a bridge in Ted's truck Or a closet with Congressman Frank? YOUTUBE - Ted Kennedy, Chappaquiddick Lifeguard Skip to comments.DFU SONG: Surrey with the Fringe on Top (Ted Kennedy, happy Chappaquiddick anniversary)DFU SONGS | 7-2004 | Lyrics, Doug from Upland Posted on 07/03/2004 5:00:40 PM PDT by doug from upland MIDI - SURREY WITH...

On a recent Friday morning, a line of bathing-suit clad students stood beside a campus swimming pool, waiting to jump in. They had come to persuade the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill they were worthy of a college degree — which they were not, in UNC's eyes, until they could swim 50 yards and tread water for five minutes.For many, it was an annoying inconvenience, for others a moment of pride in conquering their fear of water. But the scene also was a small slice of collegiate history. This was the last swim test day at one of...

In case you missed it, I hope you are going to be as angry as I am. As the DemocRATS are celebrating the 2000th death of an American hero in the war, they can barely contain themselves. But Senator Edward "Ted" Kennedy has gone way over what anyone would consider decent behavior. On Tuesday, on the floor of the Senate, when discussing the 2000th death of a hero, he actually used the following words: "On this auspicious day . . ." I read it at mensnewsdaily.com Don’t think their[sp they're] celebrating? I give you Senator Edward (the Killer) Kennedy. He...

MIDI - RHINESTONE COWBOY Leftist interest groups are sensing doom…the nominee's in the room They know that they need some help and they need it quickly Barbara Boxer’s starting to whine…but things are not going fine She’s ignored as a fool Look who is standing in the doorway…he has just flown in from Norway A bloated and drunk mound of flesh, but he is their tool It is Lifeguard Teddy…maybe he’ll take him out on the bridge for a friendly drive It is Lifeguard Teddy…if he goes there’s no chance the nominee will survive The old drunk will get...

MIDI - TAKE ME OUT TO THE BALLGAME Take me to Teddy's ballgame...we'll hear him shouting loud He will tell Rummy he ought to quit We know Teddy is so full of it He will root, root, root for the bad guys If we lose it's a shame For it's one, two, three fifths he's drunk That is Teddy's game Take me to Teddy's ballgame...he'll go out on a bridge We hear a big splash and a gurgle sound He hopes the body never is found He will root, root, root for the bad guys If we lose it's...

LET'S CALL THE WHOLE THING OFF Keep on pouring and I'll get blotto...then I will go get in my auto My legs quiver...my poor liver...I'm lucky I'm not dead You say Obama and I say Osama...pass me the bottle, I'll step on the throttle Obama, Osama, the bottle, the throttle...let's go drive on the bridge I guess that I shouldn't speak while drunk...that's what some pundits note And I should drive a Vee Dub...an Oldsmobile can't float Dodd and I so love a good waitress sandwich Pass me the mustard, and pass me the Manwich My legs quiver...oh, my...

MIDI - IT NEVER RAINS IN CALIFORNIA Sometimes we have really had enough of water Mary Jo found that out thirty-five years ago Water boarding for the terrorists Lifeguard Ted is so p*ssed Enough...we've had enough What the heck is all this rain in California My roof's leaking, and I think it's just three years old Why all of the rain in California? The DemocRATS warned ya Whose fault?...it's Bush's fault They loathe George Bush...he fills them with dread And many have gone right out of their head Some even wish that they were now dead John Kerry had...

This was just too funny. One of Mrs. DFU's favorite shows is CSI. I don't watch TV, but a re-run from 2001 was on in the background while I was putting up wallpaper. I heard the following and started laughing like h*ell in disbelief. The character Grissom says -- "Well, this is a phony as a chappaquiddick neck brace. See how the clothes are all bunched?" Organ Grinder Season 2 Episode #033 Air Date - December 13, 2001 Written by Ann Donahue, Elizabeth Devine Directed by Allison Liddi Brief Synopsis An amorous couple's desires are deflated when the hotel elevator...