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Humor (General/Chat)

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  • Doctors ask that you please not put parsley in your vagina

    01/21/2019 4:27:55 AM PST · by servo1969 · 42 replies
    New York Post ^ | 1-21-2019 | Miranda Larbi
    In a recent article by Marie Claire on how to bring on periods, the author said that the herb is a natural emmenagogue – meaning that it can stimulate or increase menstrual flow. While that is true, there’s a massive difference between sprinkling a bit of parsley over your pasta and shoving a bunch into your vagina. Marie Claire said: “Parsley can help to soften the cervix and level out hormonal imbalances that could be delaying your cycle, helping your period come faster.” “If you’re struggling to find a dish based on parsley, don’t panic – the most effective forms...
  • VANITY:Is there video compilation on the chronology of BuzzFeed story & 1/18/19 fake news reports?

    01/21/2019 6:28:21 AM PST · by SilvieWaldorfMD · 6 replies
    self ^ | 1/21/19 | self
    Looking through YouTube for a video compilation of all news sources calling for Trump's impeachment on Friday, 1/18/19 because of the BuzzFeed report about Michael Cohen's new allegations, and the way that everything came down in flames on Friday night, when Mueller released his statement pointing out inaccuracies in the story. This has the potential of becoming an "All Hail The Trumpen King" moment, if a video compilation is made or has been made. Any ideas where I could find such a compilation? I assume the same could be said and made about the MAGA hat Catholic School matter at...
  • Smiles across the Miles

    01/21/2019 5:43:48 AM PST · by sodpoodle · 2 replies
    jokes for us ^ | 1/21/2019 | multiple
    Brenda O'Malley is home making dinner as usual, when Tim Finnegan arrives at her door. "Brenda, may I come in?" he asks. "I've somethin' to tell ya." "Of course you can come in. You're always welcome, Tim. But where's my husband?" "That's what I'm here to be tellin' ya, Brenda. There was an accident down at the Guinness brewery." "Oh, God no!" cries Brenda. "Please don't tell me..." "I must, Brenda. Your husband Shamus is dead and gone. I'm sorry." Finally, she looked up at Tim. "How did it happen, Tim?" "It was terrible, Brenda. He fell into a vat...
  • Today's Toons 1/21/19

    01/21/2019 4:45:47 AM PST · by pookie18 · 19 replies
    The Briefing Room ^ | 1/21/19 | pookie18
    Click on link
  • Today's Toons problem

    01/21/2019 4:04:20 AM PST · by pookie18 · 27 replies
    pookie18 | 1/21/19 | pookie18
    Many computer problems. No idea when/if they can be fixed...so, no threads until problems are resolved.
  • Millennial Millions (SNL Skit)

    01/20/2019 3:40:39 PM PST · by Drew68 · 27 replies
    Yeah, I know... Saturday Night Live sucks, isn't funny, was only funny when I was young, yada yada yada... Still, this one nailed it. Millennials lose everything to Boomers on this game show. I loved the song about Baby Boomers. Perfect!
  • By Banishing the Work of Great Artists We Are Punishing Everyone

    01/20/2019 3:13:37 PM PST · by jocon307 · 12 replies
    I have a new fear. And this one’s a doozy. Having weathered more than one social-­media s- -t storm, I’m one column away from the round of mob opprobrium that sinks my career for good. A single unacceptable sentiment, a word usage misconstrued, a sentence taken out of context suffices these days to implode a reputation decades in the making and to trigger ­McCarthyite blacklisting. But that isn’t the fear in its entirety. Suppose a perceived violation of progressive orthodoxy translates into the kind of institutional cowardice on display in the forced resignation of Ian Buruma from The New York Review...
  • They Politicize Sports, Eating, Dressing, Sitting And Now Shaving? What's Next?

    01/20/2019 10:22:05 AM PST · by Politically Correct · 35 replies
    Ace of Spade HQ ^ | 20 Jan 2019 | CBD
    Shaving!
  • 'Hey Gillette, does this offend you?'

    01/20/2019 8:52:47 AM PST · by Paal Gulli · 47 replies
    Yahoo Lifestyle ^ | 01/18/2019 | Elise Solé
    Dad and his children pose for family photo carrying guns: 'Hey Gillette, does this offend you?' Social media personality Graham Allen and his children. (Photo: Graham Allen via Facebook) A gun-happy family is joining the resistance against Gillette for its divisive ad targeting toxic masculinity. Graham Allen, a U.S. Army vet and the host of Rant Nation on Blaze TV, posted on his Facebook page a family photo shot in a field of cotton. He carries a weapon over his shoulder and his young daughter is flanked by her two brothers who hold a handgun and a rifle. “Practicing our...
  • WE HAVE A WINNER: CLIMATE’S TALLEST TALE 2018

    01/19/2019 11:01:58 PM PST · by House Atreides · 16 replies
    The Global Warming Policy Forum ^ | January 18, 2019 | GWPF
    Before Christmas, we asked GWPF readers to send us nominations for our search to find the tallest climate tale of 2018. It’s fair to say that there was a lot of competition, with the catastrophe mongers across the media clearly working hard to ensure that they were in the running for this much sought-after accolade. We particularly enjoyed L. Robertson’s ‘Climate change, weather and road deaths’, a paper in the journal Injury Prevention, which declared that rising concentrations of greenhouse gases was going to cause a rising death toll on the roads unless governments put in ‘major mitigating countermeasure’. We...
  • Scaring the Hell out of My Mom with a Horn Blower! (humor - Youtube)

    01/19/2019 7:08:53 PM PST · by simpson96 · 15 replies
    Youtube ^ | 6/25/2015 | inkedmom
    Scaring the Hell out of My Mom with a Horn Blower!
  • Two 17 year olds try to figure out a rotary telephone

    01/19/2019 9:36:36 AM PST · by NRx · 95 replies
    YouTube ^ | 12-26-2018 | Kevin Bumstead
    My first thought was that this was staged. Nobody is that clueless. But on consideration, I think this is legit.
  • Texas drug suspects called cops after somebody stole their weed, police say

    01/18/2019 11:57:26 AM PST · by dennisw · 12 replies
    Fox News ^ | Dec 17 2019 | By Samuel Chamberlain
    Who do you call when someone steals the marijuana you're trying to sell? According to authorities in Texas, a pair of teenage would-be drug dealers opted to call the police. Investigators say 18-year-old Reed Henry and 17-year-old Jeremy Galladora contacted the Harris County Precinct 4 Constable's Office to report a robbery. When deputies arrived, the pair said they had met up with a group of men to sell an item they had listed online, only to have the men assault them and make off with the item. However, after an investigation, deputies realized Henry and Galladora were actually trying to...
  • Gillette Now Including Free Manly Side Bag With Every Purchase (Satire)

    01/18/2019 9:24:20 AM PST · by Gamecock · 16 replies
    Babylon Bee ^ | 1/15/2019
    BOSTON, MA—As part of its new ad campaign designed to target a new, more sensitive American male, Gillette announced Tuesday that the company will be giving out a free manly pink side bag with every purchase while supplies last. The bag will reportedly contain a copy of The Feminine Mystique and instructions on how to treat any toxic masculinity you may have come down with. To get the free bag, you must spend at least $20 on a Gillette razor or other hygienic product and mail in your man card to the company. "We want to appeal to the modern...
  • PANIC REIGNS AS MAJOR SNOWSTORM THREATENS TO BURY NYC !!! [vanity/satire]

    01/18/2019 8:06:59 AM PST · by Mr_Moonlight · 67 replies
    The New York Whines | January 18 2019
    January 18 2019 - The New York Whines - A huge snowstorm is threatening to overtake New York City this morning, as over 1/32nd of an inch of the dreaded semi-frozen crystals have accumulated thus far in Central Park and on the streets between Lexington and Fifth Avenues. Buses and Subways are running at half speed as ordered by Mayor Bill de Blasshole after he was awoken from his mid-morning snooze and informed of the developing calamity facing the city. Said the Mayor before resuming his nap, "I have fully capable people in positions to deal with these types of...
  • Today's Toons 1/18/19

    01/18/2019 3:14:54 AM PST · by pookie18 · 16 replies
    The Briefing Room ^ | 1/18/19 | pookie18
    Click on link
  • Media Astonished To Learn Christian School Teaches Christian Beliefs (Satirish)

    01/17/2019 3:44:49 PM PST · by Gamecock · 9 replies
    Babylon Bee ^ | 1/17/2019
    U.S.—News media outlets around the country were reportedly astonished to discover a Christian school at which second lady Karen Pence is teaching holds their students and staff to Christian beliefs. Expert journalists went to great lengths to uncover this story, unveiling the shocking revelation that a Christian woman teaches at a Christian school that affirms Christian doctrine on human sexuality that has been unchanged for 2,000 years. "It is the current year, and Christian schools still have the nerve to teach Christian things," said a CNN commentator. "I will now glare at the camera in silence for the remainder of...
  • Freshmen Dems go looking for Mitch McConnell to pressure him on shutdown, end up at wrong office

    01/17/2019 1:54:33 PM PST · by blueplum · 27 replies
    HotAir ^ | 16 Jan 2019
    The funny part of this isn’t the wrong turn. The funny part is the idea that McConnell, of all people, might be cowed by a bunch of Democrats. It’d be like the Freedom Caucus showing up at Pelosi’s office and demanding she back a balanced-budget amendment. Think she’d be intimidated? {snip} Yes, everyone’s favorite frosh was part of the group. {snip} They left a note signed by more than 30 House freshmen for him on his desk in the Senate, hoping, I guess, that he’ll read it and “run train” on the shutdown.
  • So-called ‘flushable wipes’ pile up in Lexington sewers

    01/17/2019 10:11:55 AM PST · by Honest Nigerian · 30 replies
    Lexington Herald Leader ^ | JANUARY 16, 2019
    Those “flushable” wipes you put down the toilet may have to be removed by hand from the city sewage equipment they clog. The cleansing cloths, dubbed “flushable wipes,” are marketed for post-toilet use but are typically not biodegradable. They do not dissolve like toilet paper does when flushed, and once in the sewer system, they can clump together and cause problems. It’s a mess Rod Chervus, the collections and conveyance manager for Lexington’s sanitary sewer department, has been dealing with for several years, and it’s getting worse. “If it says ‘flushable wipe,’ don’t believe it. Don’t flush it down the...
  • Satire. Poll Finds Most People OK With Raising Taxes On Other People

    01/17/2019 8:20:41 AM PST · by gattaca · 22 replies
    U.S.—In a stunning new poll, Americans indicated they are OK with a 70% marginal tax rate, indicating that since the hefty taxes would only apply to other people and not themselves, they are alright with the extremely high taxes. "See, a lot of people think the proposed 70% tax rate is way too high," said one woman in California. "But what they don't understand is that the 70% is only on really rich people---in other words, not me. Let's crank it up to 90, 100, or 110% even. I don't mind in the slightest." Americans all over the country suggested...