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Keyword: humorless

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  • It wasn’t worth it, says 103-year-old vegetarian

    09/02/2018 6:37:25 PM PDT · by aMorePerfectUnion · 41 replies
    The daily mash ^ | October 2015 | staff
    A MAN who extended his life span by avoiding processed meats bitterly regrets having done so, it has emerged. 103-year-old Roy Hobbs never ate sausages, bacon or black pudding apart from a one-off fried breakfast which he admits was mind-bendingly delicious. He said: “I am over a century old, partly because I’ve exercised extreme self-control when it comes to my base desire for meat. “Many times I’ve been tempted. One time in Birmingham train station I actually bought a burger and raised it to my salivating mouth, but never took a bite. “Only once, while staying in a corporate hotel...
  • 'You know that's like some $5 wine': Obama turns stand-up and rips into Trump's 'over-priced' wine

    03/12/2016 8:13:35 PM PST · by pilgrim · 95 replies
    Daily Mail ^ | March 12, 2016 | Kahlan Rosenblatt
    President Obama gave what could easily be considered a stand-up comedy routine at a Democratic fundraiser in Dallas, Texas, on Saturday. The president hasn't endorsed a candidate yet, but he made an appearance at the fundraiser to try and ensure whoever gets the nomination is financially set to beat the Republicans. During the talk, given a day after he gave the keynote speech at South by Southwest in Austin, Texas, Obama rubbed elbows with Texas Democrats and even tried on a cowboy hat. But it was when he took the stage at Gilley's Club, where the Democratic National Committee...
  • The Jacksonville Jaguars Apologized For Their Mascot’s ‘Towels Carry Ebola’ Sign

    10/07/2014 3:39:49 AM PDT · by SoFloFreeper · 11 replies
    uproxx.com ^ | 10/6/14 | Brian Sharp
    The Jacksonville Jaguars’ mascot Jaxson de Ville was seen on the field Sunday carrying a sign that read ‘Towels Carry Ebola’ in an apparent attempt to make fun of Steelers fans’ use of the Terrible Towel. On Monday, Jaguars team President Mark Lamping apologized for the incident....
  • The NCAA tournament has barely started, and we already have our first racist chant (video)

    03/16/2012 10:16:12 AM PDT · by SoFloFreeper · 17 replies
    NBC Sports ^ | 3/15/2012 | Rick Chandler
    Rick Chandler Mar 15, 2012, 2:37 PM EDT Skip to Comments (16) Tweet 72 29 Like Future Queen Consort of England wields a field hockey stick like she means business Penthouse Pet had fling with Florida Panther, says ex-husband Reuters Future Queen Consort of England wields a field hockey stick like she means business Penthouse Pet had fling with Florida Panther, says ex-husband The NCAA tournament has barely started, and we already have our first racist chant (video) 16 Comments The State of Mississippi, fresh from representing in the Republican primary election on Tuesday, showed us again what they’re made...
  • TSA Images Thread - Pics, Bumper Stickers, T-shirts, you name it, you post it

    11/22/2010 8:13:49 PM PST · by FreedomPoster · 108 replies · 2+ views
    Vanity | Nov 22, 2010 | FP
    I came across this item and wanted to post it up, which led to the question: Where? Well, the answer I came up with is In this thread:
  • Comedians: Still Nothing Funny About Obama

    02/03/2009 12:42:33 AM PST · by Scott Martin · 43 replies · 2,284+ views
    The Patriot Room ^ | 2-3-09 | Scott Martin
    Video at the link. Check out the latest Saturday Night Live skit: It seems as if comedians are still unable to find anything funny about President Obama, as apparently Obama's flaws are not yet clear. The main jokes feature Obama ripping Americans and President Bush. And, of course, Joe Biden. But seriously, what isn't funny about Joe Biden. Except the fact that he is somehow Vice President of the United States...
  • Obama on a pedestal could be worse than an absurd caricature

    07/15/2008 7:27:48 PM PDT · by AmericanMade1776 · 13 replies · 284+ views
    Politics in Cover.com ^ | 07/15/2008 | Wayne Dawkins
    Dignified, yes, but there is no way that he is a saint Well, at least that's out of the way. The July 21 New Yorker magazine cover of a turbaned Barack Obama, Angela Davis-Afroed, AK-47 accessorized spouse Michelle, Osama bin Laden portrait on the wall, and American flag burning in the fireplace drew predictable howls of protest from the Obama and opponent McCain presidential camps. With the "Politics of Fear" satirical take on the Obamas, didn't the magazine publish what many people are thinking, figuratively, or literally? I'm not satisfied with the complaints that the New Yorker gave comfort to...
  • At Correspondents Dinner: Brian Williams Belches 'Battle Hymn of the Republic'

    03/29/2007 1:18:21 PM PDT · by meg88 · 70 replies · 419+ views
    Newsbusters.org ^ | 3/29/07 | Scott Whitlock
    On Thursday’s morning shows, all three networks seemed to take delight in showing "MC Rove" ham it up for Wednesday night’s Radio & Television Correspondents Association dinner. None, however, showed the video footage of the distinguished Brian Williams, anchor of the "NBC Nightly News," burping the "Battle Hymn of the Republic." The Los Angeles Times, one media outlet that did report the event, covered it this way: For their first act, [comedians Colin Mochrie and Brad Sherwood] recruited NBC anchor Williams and Cheryl Gould, senior vice president of NBC News, to deliver the sound effects for a nonsensical skit about...
  • Advocates for legalizing marijuana tout the benefits at Hempfest

    08/21/2006 5:54:00 PM PDT · by Know your rights · 158 replies · 833+ views
    Seattle Post-Intelligencer (WA) ^ | August 21, 2006 | MIKE LEWIS
    Former Seattle police Chief Norm Stamper doesn't have dreadlocks, a Zig-Zag T-shirt or a single Phish album. He just sounds like it. "It's laughable when people say we are winning the drug war," said Stamper, who had just finished a main-stage speech to the crowd gathered Sunday at the Seattle Hempfest in Myrtle Edwards Park. "The people who are prosecuting the drug war are invested psychically and financially. It's a holy war for them. "We should legalize all drugs." While the comments might be unusual for most law enforcement careerists, they are nothing new for Stamper, who was Seattle's top...
  • We're not laughing now (Sure we are, at you: “eloquence of a second greater.”)

    07/18/2006 8:51:14 AM PDT · by Liberty Toad · 154 replies · 3,763+ views
    Remember back in 200 when George W. Bush was running for President? Even if you didn't support him, you were somewhat anticipating a Presidency with this amusing guy who didn't know the names of foreign leaders and who spoke with the eloquence of a second greater. Remember how after he was elected,Comedy Central even saw his Presidency as being whimsical enough to create a show, "That's my Bush." It was a laugh a minute back in those Bush salad days. Now we have quagmires in Iraq and Afghanistan, a budding world war centered around Israel, $3 a gallon gas, $85...
  • Radio show apologizes for "sex assault" poll

    06/06/2006 8:36:35 AM PDT · by presidio9 · 5 replies · 489+ views
    Reuters ^ | 666
    Hosts of a chat show on a Hong Kong radio station apologized Tuesday for an Internet survey asking its listeners to vote which actress they would most like to sexually assault. The Commercial Radio poll drew widespread criticism last week, with teachers, legislators and ordinary citizens slamming it for advocating violence against women and for corrupting youth. "The program hosts and co-workers publicly apologize for any offence that the Internet poll 'Which female artiste would you most like to sexually assault' caused to female artistes and everyone in Hong Kong," a message posted on the radio Web site said. The...
  • They Can't Take a Joke (What’s the matter with Islam is also the matter with Kansas? Free Speech?)

    02/14/2006 1:51:54 PM PST · by nickcarraway · 15 replies · 527+ views
    New York Magazine ^ | February 20, 2006 | Kurt Andersen
    What’s the matter with Islam is also the matter with Kansas. But who says freedom of speech isn’t a little negotiable?As a phrase born in the nineties, “the clash of civilizations” had an orotund, Ivy League–lecture-hall ring—vaguely worrisome but with the fuzzy comfort of all grand historical abstractions. This reductionist idea was then reduced still further to signify only the most salient of clashes: Western Christendom versus Islam. Even after 9/11, though, it was hard for me to buy completely that it’s our culture Muslims irreconcilably loathe—that is, feminism and show business and laissez-faire conversation—rather than America’s support of Israel...
  • THE CLOCK IS TICKING! ORDER YOUR HOLIDAY SONGS TODAY!

    12/16/2005 6:43:55 AM PST · by SteveSpeaking · 83 replies · 1,414+ views
    Home made. | 16 December 2005 | STEVE
    New from Al-Jezzara! HOLIDAY HITS! OVER 1,400 YEARS IN THE MAKING! Order now for the Winter Holidays! Just listen to some of these instant classics. Infidels (formally Jingle Bells) Dashing thru the sand, With a Christian head in hand, While we speak of peace, Our Jihad will not cease! Watch them wring their hands, Just like we have planned, Oh what fun it is to kill, On our way to paradise! Infidels! Infidels! We will kill you all! Strapping on our dynamite, At bus stops and the malls! Infidels! Infidels! We will kill you all! While we speak the words...
  • The World According to J.C. (Jimmy Carter)

    11/01/2005 9:13:45 PM PST · by gpapa · 31 replies · 1,007+ views
    OpinionJournal.com ^ | Bret Stephens | November 2, 2005
    "Tedious" doesn't begin to describe the new book by America's worst ex-president. BY BRET STEPHENS Wednesday, November 2, 2005 12:01 a.m. EST Jimmy Carter's 20th book is a tedious meditation about the appropriate uses of moral values in political life--as wisely and humbly exemplified by Himself--and of their misuses under the current Bush administration. But tedious isn't quite the right word here, because it suggests mere boredom while Mr. Carter's prose manages to be irritating as well. Is there an English-language equivalent to the German Rechthaberei, which loosely translates as the state of thinking and behaving as if you're in...
  • How & Why to Re-focus Halloween as a "Fall Festival"

    10/07/2005 10:14:25 AM PDT · by The Spirit Of Allegiance · 258 replies · 4,460+ views
    GTBE email ^ | 10/07/05 | self
    Re-focus Halloween! If your school insists on having some kind of Halloween celebration, recommend that they steer away from the ghoulish and occult and, instead, focus on the event as a fall festival. ... "When you turn evil into a game, it trivializes it and numbs children to its darkness." (excerpt from email) GREAT RESOURCE SITE for Teachers, Parents & Students.
  • Hollywood Boycott List

    Hollywood Boycott List...Updated And Alphabetized.
  • A Day In The Life

    07/25/2003 7:43:55 AM PDT · by Admin Moderator · 17 replies · 333+ views
    Sometimes, we get the darnedest complaints. I like these two we just got (from the same complaintant).On the thread dead posted, "Is it really appropriate to post cartoons featuring actual dead people in them?"On this thread JohnHuang2 posted, "Regarding #12 Explicit photos of the dead? If you let this go, would it be okay to post pictures of car crash victims and murder scenes?"Some people just crack me up, if they mean to or not.
  • There are probably many reasons why Mondale doesn't want to debate Coleman...

    11/01/2002 9:03:07 AM PST · by Registered · 16 replies · 214+ views
    Registered ^ | 11.01.02 | Registered