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Keyword: mcgreeveymorford08

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  • Bring on 6$ a Gallon Gas

    05/10/2006 7:56:48 PM PDT · by Tzimisce · 50 replies · 2,161+ views
    SFGate.com ^ | Mark Morford
    No wait, not six. To hell with that. Make it 10. Ten bucks a gallon, no matter what the going rate for a barrel of light sweet crude. That would so completely, violently, brilliantly do it. Revolutionize the country. Firebomb our pungent stasis. Change everything. Don't you agree? Here's what we could do: Give gas discounts to cab drivers (at least initially) and metro transit systems and low-income folks, those who have to drive their busted-up '78 Honda Civics to their jobs scrubbing restaurant toilets and flipping burgers and vacuuming the residual cocaine from the seat cushions of numb SUV...
  • Communism and human nature (Bolshie Mod sez, Arise ye kittens of the earth!)

    04/05/2005 10:50:57 AM PDT · by Sammy sam · 153 replies · 8,234+ views
    Many argue that communism will never be possible because of "human nature". The essence of this false argument is the belief that a communist society would consist of an all-powerful central government that would tell everybody what to do--and would therefore undermine the creative initiative of individuals and the search for happiness. • This argument is based on two false assumptions: (1) It assumes that a communist society will look like the former Soviet Union, or the current China, North Korea, etc (ie: corrupt police states with a feudal-style ruling class) (2) It assumes that people will only work in...
  • Ho Hum, More War And Death

    01/19/2005 12:07:47 AM PST · by SmithL · 11 replies · 761+ views
    San Francisco Chronicle ^ | 1/19/5 | Mark Morford
    What happens when habitual warmongering and BushCo lies become part of our daily diet? And then you read the appalling little story about how BushCo is now "taking steps" to further the investigation into why their original intelligence on Iraq was so painfully, treasonously, colon-clenchingly wrong, why they thought Saddam had giant Costco-sized warehouses stacked to the rafters with snarling nukes and nasty biotoxins and active warheads when, in fact, he had nothing but a couple Dumpsters full of rusty 20-year-old shell casings and a bucket of stale glue.
  • Stray Dogs Deserve Back Rubs

    01/14/2005 9:53:29 AM PST · by SmithL · 20 replies · 1,158+ views
    San Francisco Chronicle ^ | 1/14/5 | Mark Morford
    We kill millions of pets every year Who cares if a few get posh shelters and humane laws? OK. So I tend to think people who insist on calling themselves pet "guardians" instead of "owners" are exasperating and a bit wrongheaded, and that such uber-PC thinking does almost nothing to change or improve the behavior of the thousands of animal abusers in this country. And I tend to agree with fabulous dog writer Jon Katz that such semantic sidestepping does more harm to the animals than good, and leads to naive treatment, lack of decent training and an outright ignorance...
  • Resolutions For The Damned

    01/05/2005 8:06:15 AM PST · by SmithL · 20 replies · 1,032+ views
    San Francisco Chronicle ^ | 1/5/5 | Mark Morford
    A new year, a Bush-gutted, storm-ravaged world and you in need of some juicy, heartfelt pledges -- This is the year. No, really. This is the it. This is the year you resolve to let it all hang out and lick the fingertips of the divine and stop holding back and stop quivering with unchecked anticipation/dread as you realize that, if you care a whit for self-definition and spiritual nuance and hot wet intelligence and deep karmic color in this tsunami-hammered, Bush-ravaged world, you are desperately needed right now. It's true. Alas, many are dejected. Many of the blue or...
  • Amazon.com Is For Republicans

    12/22/2004 8:05:50 AM PST · by SmithL · 83 replies · 3,109+ views
    San Francisco Chronicle ^ | 12/22/4 | Mark Morford
    Attention, liberal shoppers! Next year, screw those GOP-supportin' companies, and try buying blue Do you care much that greasy ol' Pizza Hut gave tens of thousands in PAC money to the GOP last year? How about the fact that Taco Bell stopped pumping out their happily toxic semirancid meatlike substances just long enough to write a fat check to the conservative Right? Isn't that weirdly fascinating, in a depressing and indigestible sort of way? Does it matter a whit that, say, Fruit of the Loom underwear gave nearly 100 percent of its corporate donations to tighty-whitey-wearing Republicans, nearly every one...
  • Come See Our Hideous Slab

    12/17/2004 7:47:42 AM PST · by SmithL · 104 replies · 3,334+ views
    San Francisco Chronicle ^ | 12/17/4 | Mark Morford
    As the world swoons over France's soaring beauty of a bridge, S.F. gets slapped with an eyesore And did you hear the one about how those gul-dang baguette-sucking antiwar French just completed work on this astounding new bridge, a soaring, airy, delicate thing erected in southern France, and it's all over the international press and the French people are justifiably proud and even the venerable Le Monde has deemed the new Millau bridge a "work of art," and the amazing pictures are being featured everywhere, for good reason? And you look at the photos and see the breathtakingly elegant architecture...
  • Canada Goes To Hell Legal pot? Legal gay marriage? Universal health care? What's next,...

    12/15/2004 7:32:53 PM PST · by SmithL · 24 replies · 1,023+ views
    San Francisco Chronicle ^ | 12/15/4 | Mark Morford
    Legal pot? Legal gay marriage? Universal health care? What's next, free porn and candy? Did you hear the screams? Did you feel the menacing chill? Did you see the black and ominous clouds, moving north? Did you sense, in other words, the very presence of Satan himself as he laughed maniacally and tossed around bucketfuls of ultrathin condoms and little travel-size packets of Astroglide like confetti while riding his Harley Softail up to Toronto or maybe Edmonton to join the ghastly and sodomitic celebrations? Because it's happened. Canada's high court just ruled that the government can, if it so desires,...
  • Legal pot? Legal gay marriage? Universal health care? What's next, free porn and candy? (Morford)

    12/15/2004 10:26:23 AM PST · by RightWingAtheist · 44 replies · 11,717+ views
    SFGate.com ^ | December 15 2004 | Mark Morford (hot for Sven Robinson)
    Did you hear the screams? Did you feel the menacing chill? Did you see the black and ominous clouds, moving north? Did you sense, in other words, the very presence of Satan himself as he laughed maniacally and tossed around bucketfuls of ultrathin condoms and little travel-size packets of Astroglide like confetti while riding his Harley Softail up to Toronto or maybe Edmonton to join the ghastly and sodomitic celebrations? Because it's happened. Canada's high court just ruled that the government can, if it so desires, redefine marriage to include gay couples, which it has declared it will do almost...
  • Morford: What Are You, On Drugs?

    12/08/2004 8:33:37 AM PST · by presidio9 · 38 replies · 1,096+ views
    San Francisco Chronic-le ^ | Wednesday, December 8, 2004 | Mark Morford (does not take her Thorazine orallly)
    The odds are very good that you are on drugs. Right now. This minute. As I type this and as you read this and as false Texas dictators rise and sad empires crumble and as this mad bewildered world spins in its frantically careening orbit, there's a nearly 50/50 chance that some sort of devious synthetic chemical manufactured by some massive and largely heartless corporation is coursing through your bloodstream and humping your brain stem and molesting your karma and kicking the crap out of your libido and chattering the teeth of your very bones. Maybe it's regulating your blood...
  • Morford: Very, Very Dirty Pictures

    12/03/2004 7:37:58 AM PST · by presidio9 · 111 replies · 5,208+ views
    San Francisco Chronicle ^ | Friday, December 3, 2004 | Mark Morford; the Marboro Man gets her hot
    This is what you won't see in the paper. This is what you won't see on CNN or on MSNBC or CBS News or on any major media Web site anywhere and especially no goddamn way ever in hell will you see it within a thousand miles of Fox News. You aren't supposed to see. You aren't supposed to know. You are to remain ignorant and shielded, and, if you're like most Americans, you have been very carefully conditioned to think Bush's nasty Iraq war is merely this ugly little firecracker-like thing happening way, way over there, carefully orchestrated and...
  • Mark Morford: Monday Night Softcore

    11/21/2004 9:47:34 AM PST · by gopwinsin04 · 29 replies · 2,130+ views
    The San Francisco Chronic ^ | 11/20/04 | Mark Morford, the pillow biter
    So, who are they? Who are the ones who have no problem watching a Monday Night Football game in which huge sweaty steroid pakced men in cute homoerotic tights smash each other as hard as possible hoping they break bodies, induce aneurysms and draw blood during out most violent, drug addled and corrupted national televised sporting spectatcle, but actually picked up the phone to complain to ABC about the 'racy' ad promoting 'Desperate Housewives' that led into the game? They are the same people that complained about 1.5 seconds of Janet Jackson's nipple, the same ones who complain about low...
  • Get Out And Vote And Scream

    10/29/2004 3:08:41 AM PDT · by Cincinatus' Wife · 48 replies · 992+ views
    San Francisco Chronicle ^ | October 29, 2004 | Mark Morford, SF Gate Columnist
    So here we are, staring down a rather historic moment amidst the sputtering ideological orgy that is the American experiment and if you're paying any sort of attention at all you're doubtlessly drunk on election hype and saturated with Bush/Kerry platitudes and you wish a white-hot death upon every screeching TV pundit who is right now analyzing yet another insidious national poll that seems to reveal everything and nothing at the exact same time. And Bush is out there right this very second stumping and sweating and blinking fast and defending his useless hideous little war and hurling snide little...
  • Write More About Skull & Bones

    10/27/2004 7:48:11 AM PDT · by SmithL · 15 replies · 699+ views
    San Francisco Chronicle ^ | 10/27/4 | Mark Morford
    Secret societies? UFOs? The truth about what *really* happened on 9/11? The media cowers I get this a lot: Hey Mark, you're a rather weird, unconventional columnist, why don't you quit toeing the typical blasé journalism line and renounce the corporate-controlled news feeds and standard pop-culture drivel and instead write about the real truths, the real and sinister power structures at work in America and the world? Like for example how both Kerry and Bush are members of mega-yuppie Yale secret society/boys' club Skull & Bones, and therefore suckle at the same tit of nefarious primeval Illuminati power and draw...
  • Can John Kerry Cure Cancer?

    10/15/2004 7:59:14 AM PDT · by SmithL · 24 replies · 2,058+ views
    San Francisco Chronicle ^ | 10/15/4 | Mark Morford
    Miracle worker or no, after the tyranny of BushCo, a "normal" prez will be a blessed relief There will not be a great parting of the clouds. There will not be brighter flowers and happier puppies. There will not be massive choruses of angels singing and birds chirping and dolphins finally standing upright and speaking fluent Latin and saying we knew it all along. Let's be real: Should Kerry win this election, we are most likely not in for a spectacular and unprecedented ride of shiny progressive glory that will astound the world and reignite the collective soul and float...
  • Morford: Kiss My Megatruck, Dude

    09/28/2004 6:25:12 AM PDT · by presidio9 · 56 replies · 1,970+ views
    San Francisco Chronicle ^ | Wednesday, September 22, 2004 | Mark Morford
    Aww, screw it. I mean, really. You just gotta love this thing. You just gotta love the fact that some semitruck company somewhere called International Truck and Engine Corp. is now coming out with what they claim is the world's largest production pickup, called the CXT, all 9 feet high and 8 feet wide, a whopping 21 feet long and 14,500 pounds and 18 million excruciating earthly groans of it. And in most states that don't give a crap for their roads or the environment or any human life that might be existing in the various passenger cars surrounding it,...
  • Morford: Love Masochism? Vote BushCo!

    09/15/2004 10:41:00 AM PDT · by presidio9 · 25 replies · 758+ views
    San Francisco Chronicle ^ | Wednesday, September 15, 2004 | Mark Morford, surrendering Dorthy?
    I have a good friend who believes, gloomily, bitterly, resignedly, that not only are we in for four more years of painful and cheerless BushCo-branded tyranny and misprision and aww-shucks dumb-guy shtick, but also that we are actually at the beginning of a long, brutal, fear-based Republican juggernaut that will last a good 16 more years, at least. Because this is how long it will take for the current horrific conservative cycle to play itself out, and this would resemble a more typical and historically proven 20-year pendulum swing, in this case one toward neoconservative right-wing hate and homophobia and...
  • Morford: Apocalypse Bush! (Why care for the planet when the End Times are almost here?)

    09/09/2004 10:52:34 AM PDT · by presidio9 · 55 replies · 1,537+ views
    San Francisco Chronicle ^ | Wednesday, September 8, 2004 | Mark Morford, read by FReepers and few others
    This is the great thing about rabid fundamentalism. You really just don't have to give a damn. Take the environment. I mean, isn't it just a little pointless to care so damn deeply about the air and the soil and the water and the stupid little disposable animals on this silly spinning ball of expendable rock when the Second Coming is imminent and a blood-soaked fire-breathin' Jesus who looks remarkably like Mel Gibson will return very soon to smite the heathens and the gays and the vegetarians and the Francophiles, and who will rescue all those who worship patriarchy and...
  • Morford: Where Is Your Hallowed Balm? Music? Yoga? Porn?

    09/03/2004 11:01:24 AM PDT · by MikalM · 36 replies · 1,451+ views
    San Francisco Chronicle ^ | 9/3/04 | Mark Morford (who never disappoints)
    I am searching for a few good things. Things to counteract, to dissolve the simmering dread, to deflect the waves of nausea and karmic pain induced by the incessantly depressing media maelstrom and the appallingly hateful gloat of the GOP convention and by the most tyrannical administration and least articulate American president in 100 years. You know how it is. And you say to yourself, these things, these radiant gems that live outside the mass-media miasma, I need them because they provide some balm, soften the fact that the nation feels massively off track and blinded and war torn and...
  • Morford: Dick Cheney Gets His Gay On

    09/01/2004 10:55:20 AM PDT · by MikalM · 16 replies · 857+ views
    San Francisco Chronicle ^ | 9/1/04 | Mark Morford (who else?)
    Bunny-curdling screams were heard throughout the Beltway last week and Laura Bush herself got all flustered and confused as vice president and noted hunk of rabid warmongering neoconservatism Dick Cheney broke ranks with his party of other hunks of rabid warmongering neoconservatives and admitted, in public, that he thinks gay people are, you know, mostly OK. Sort of. A little. In small doses. "With respect to the question of relationships, my general view is that freedom means freedom for everyone. People ought to be able to free -- ought to be free to enter into any kind of relationship they...
  • Morford: Sentient Non-Idiots For Kerry

    08/27/2004 7:13:22 AM PDT · by presidio9 · 18 replies · 788+ views
    San Francisco Chronicle ^ | Friday, August 27, 2004 | Mark Morford, non-sentient drug-addicted talentless androgenous pervert
    And isn't it funny how at least 13 members of Congress have actually requested that the United Nations monitor this year's U.S. presidential election, just because, just in case, just to ensure there's no voter rolling and election rigging and chad hanging and outright shameless Florida reaming like last time? And isn't it even more funny how, when firebrand U.S. Rep. Corrine Brown, from Florida, brought the issue up on the floor of Congress, she was actually shouted down by the Republicans, scolded that she was out of order and told her comments should be stricken from the record? And...
  • Morford: What Price Youth, Spider-Man? (Self-Absorption Alert!)

    08/25/2004 10:11:57 AM PDT · by MikalM · 11 replies · 683+ views
    San Francisco Chronicle ^ | 8/25/04 | Mark Morford (continuing his slide into irrelevancy)
    So then a largish envelope comes in the mail and it's from my mother and it contains a single, well-used comic book sealed in a plastic Zip-Loc bag, a book from my childhood she found in a storage box in the garage in our family's cabin getaway up in northern Idaho. And my mother, being smart and attuned and with the times as she is, she noticed the comic's title, and the main characters, and her eyebrows went up and she thought I might want to see it. Here's why: It's a Spider-Man comic. It's from 1976. It's in excellent...
  • Morford: This Man Touched My Parrot

    08/24/2004 6:56:43 AM PDT · by presidio9 · 28 replies · 928+ views
    San Francisco Chronicle ^ | August 20, 2004 | Mark Morford, the gerbil was not available for handling
    How good and refreshing and inspiring is it, in these war-drunk, anti-everything, BushCo-ravaged times, to discover a gem of pure unadulterated free-thinking humanity and funkiness and animal tenderness sitting just outside the teeming city walls? How life affirming and encouraging is it to stumble, quite randomly, quite unexpectedly, across what is probably the funniest, most caring, most quirky, most unexpected, most hugely popular, intensely local veterinarian in the entire Bay Area even though I can't verify that because I've only been to like, two, but I'm willing to risk saying it anyway? I am here with an answer: It is...
  • Morford: Still Proud To Be In S.F. (Gay Marriage)

    08/18/2004 10:06:03 AM PDT · by MikalM · 16 replies · 704+ views
    San Francisco Chronicle ^ | 8/18/04 | Mark Morford (who else?)
    No one in his/her right mind truly believed that San Francisco's landmark same-sex marriages would stand the test of the scowling California Supreme Court or the white-hot glare of the rabid homophobic war-drunk BushCo Right. It was almost no contest, a leather-clad dove versus an archaic, oily tank from the word go -- or, rather, from the words "I do."