Keyword: rofl

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  • Amazon Reviews of Hillary's New Book.

    09/17/2016 9:39:41 AM PDT · by proust · 80 replies
    Amazon ^ | 9/17/16 | Amazon Customers
    "I bought the audio-book version and all I could hear was coughing" "The chapter where Hillbilly talks about her battle with Parkinson's Disease was difficult to read. Difficult because it was missing from the book." "What a horrible book. I got brain damage after 4 pages and lost my shoe." "Even though I did not pay for it, I want my money back" "Evidently you can judge a book by its cover"
  • Air force secretary gets sick flying with Thunderbirds

    06/28/2014 7:42:48 AM PDT · by markomalley · 91 replies
    The Washington Times ^ | 6/28/2014 | Rowan Scarborough
    Air Force Secretary Deborah Lee James became “violently ill” during a ride with the storied Thunderbirds aerial acrobatic team this week. Commanders at Nellis Air Force Base, Nev., thought it would be good PR to invite the relatively new secretary for a flight with its most famous squadron. Amid tight defense spending, there is pressure to demonstrate the worth of the Thunderbirds, which is back in the air show business after having been grounded last year when sequestration took hold. But Tuesday’s F-16 flight did not go as planned in the cockpit for Ms. James, a former House defense staffer,...
  • Kerry: 'We Drove a Very Hard Bargain' With Iran

    11/28/2013 11:57:06 AM PST · by ColdOne · 50 replies ^ | 11/26/13 | Amy Woods
    Kerry appeared in a short video explaining he "drove a very hard bargain" with Iranian negotiators to effectively set back their nuclear ambitions, The Hill reports. "We drove a very hard bargain to achieve what we needed to in terms of our verification and certainty about where they're going," Kerry said. “We drove a hard bargain because we have one unwavering purpose in our goal: President Obama has been absolutely clear that Iran cannot and will not acquire a nuclear weapon
  • Photo of the Week (Sebelious handed "Websites for Dummies")

    11/02/2013 7:52:45 AM PDT · by AAABEST · 30 replies
    PJ Media ^ | November 2, 2013 | Ed Driscoll
    She told community leaders the public needs to be reminded that the website does not function like, where customers are used to logging on to buy a product “like a Tickle Me Elmo doll”** before someone else gets it. In this case, Sebelius said, the service is constant and doesn’t run out. Rep. Steve Cohen (D-Tenn.) who invited Sebelius to the city, bristled at some of the questions she was asked, saying “Change is hard. Get over it. Barack Obama is president, and the Affordable Care Act is the law.” In the crowd was Republican state Sen. Brian...
  • Hey Democrats and Obama! You're not doing enough to hurt us! Come on, hurt us!

    10/05/2013 6:29:58 PM PDT · by MeneMeneTekelUpharsin · 38 replies
    "Vanity of vanities. All is vanity and striving after the wind." Solomon | 5 October 2013 | Mene Mene Tekel Upharsin
    Come on Federal Agency heads, Democrats and Obama, hurt us! You're not trying hard enough. Close major highways! Shut off all television, radio, movies and the internet. We're not suffering enough. Stop all disability and welfare checks. We're still laughing at you. What are you going to do next when you don't get your way, throw a tantrum on the mall? I told all of you Obama wasn't the problem. He isn't the problem. The Federal agency heads ARE a huge part of the problem for implementing all of this. The Federal government and everyone who works for Federal agencies...
  • Government Classifies Bacon as a Schedule 1 Drug

    09/06/2013 1:10:04 PM PDT · by Talisker · 115 replies
    21 USC § 812 (b) (1) (b) (22) No joke - check it out yourself. Into the slammer, bacon pushers.
  • ‘Top GOP Senator’ To ABC News: If Romney Loses Michigan, ‘He Will Publicly Call’ For Jeb Bush

    02/26/2012 6:35:08 PM PST · by Halfmanhalfamazing · 123 replies
    Mediaite ^ | February 18th | Frances Martel
    For those out there loving the current Republican race but worrying that it has become somewhat orthodox in appearance and stable in candidates and support numbers, fear not: ABC News’ Jonathan Karl has the blind item for you. In the most mysterious and, for the GOP, worrisome dispatch on the Republican field in a while, Karl reports that a “prominent Republican senator” told him that the Party will not stand for a Mitt Romney loss in Michigan, and that he expects a result like that to lead the Senator to “publicly call for the party to find a new candidate,”...
  • Bob Dole endorses Romney for Republican nominee

    12/18/2011 11:37:30 AM PST · by NormsRevenge · 105 replies
    Yahoo ^ | 12/18/11 | Deborah Charles - Reuters
    Republican elder statesman and former Senate leader Bob Dole on Sunday endorsed Mitt Romney to be the Republican presidential nominee, a day after the former Massachusetts governor received the backing of Iowa's main newspaper. In an open letter to Iowa voters, Dole - himself a former presidential candidate - said a great deal was at stake on January 3, when Iowa votes in the first nominating contest for the 2012 presidential election. "A number of my friends are currently candidates seeking the GOP nomination. But the time has now come for us to decide who among them can defeat Barack...
  • Osama bin Laden's killing a huge boost for President Obama

    05/02/2011 3:03:51 AM PDT · by Cincinatus' Wife · 144 replies
    Los Angeles Times ^ | May 2, 2011 | Paul West, Washington Bureau
    Bin Laden's killing is a singular moment for President Obama and could help his bid for a second term. Reporting from Washington— A foreign policy novice when he came to office, President Obama can now claim a national security victory that eluded his predecessor for almost eight years. The caliber of his leadership, often the target of withering attacks by the Republican opposition, has now been bolstered in a very tangible way, as the image of celebrating crowds gathering spontaneously at the White House and the former World Trade Center in New York late Sunday night demonstrated. ....The development is...
  • NYT News Analysis: Obama Seeks a Course of Pragmatism in the Middle East

    03/11/2011 2:46:57 AM PST · by Cincinatus' Wife · 22 replies
    New York Times ^ | March 10, 2011 | MARK LANDLER and HELENE COOPER
    WASHINGTON — In the Middle East crisis, as on other issues, there are two Barack Obamas: the transformative historical figure and the pragmatic American president. Three months after a Tunisian fruit vendor set himself aflame and ignited a political firestorm across the Arab world, the president is trumping the trailblazer. With the spread of antigovernment protests from North Africa to the strategic, oil-rich Persian Gulf, President Obama has adopted a policy of restraint. He has concluded that his administration must shape its response country by country, aides say, recognizing a stark reality that American national security interests weigh as heavily...
  • Pelosi and the Tea Party 'Share Views'

    02/28/2010 6:20:51 AM PST · by Sub-Driver · 31 replies · 956+ views
    Pelosi and the Tea Party 'Share Views' February 28, 2010 8:15 AM House Speaker Nancy Pelosi says she has much in common with the Tea Party. The speaker now says she shares views with movement she dismissed last summer as being “Astroturf” -- her suggestion that the grassroots of the Tea Party were a creation of the Republican Party. In a “This Week” interview with ABC’s Elizabeth Vargas, Pelosi said, “We share some of the views of the Tea Partiers in terms of the role of special interest in Washington, D.C., as -- it just has to stop. And that's...
  • Israeli Official Ridicules Dubai's Demand for Arrest of Mossad Chief

    02/18/2010 12:15:14 PM PST · by hennie pennie · 35 replies · 952+ views
    ABCnews:Mobile ^ | February 17, 2010 | ABC news staff
    Interpol has issued wanted notices for 11 suspects in the murder of Hamas commander Mahmoud al-Mabhouh, but Dubai's police chief has asked that Interpol also call for the arrest of the head of Israel's spy agency. Dahi Khalfan Tamin told Dubai TV he had asked the international police agency to issue one of its "red notices" for the head of Mossad, "in case Mossad is believed to be behind the crime, which is likely now." A senior Israeli official who wished to remain anonymous told ABC News that if Dubai asks for the arrest of Mossad chief Meir Dagan, "They...
  • Ken Lewis: If I’m Going Down, Hank Paulson and Ben Bernanke Are Coming Down With Me

    02/05/2010 2:42:22 PM PST · by FTJM · 45 replies · 1,755+ views
    New York Magazine ^ | 2/4/10 | Jessica Pressler
    No WAY is Bank of America CEO Ken Lewis going to be the only one to answer for the acquisition of crappy Merrill Lynch and its crappy bonuses, "a person close to Lewis's defense team" (who may or may not be Ken Lewis himself) tells Charlie Gasparino today on the Daily Beast. NO WAY will he be a scapegoat, alone, for the people who twisted his arm to go through with the Merrill deal by telling him he would be fired if he didn't. "If this thing goes to trial you can expect both Paulson and Bernanke to be on...
  • Things are looking up, sez President Barack Obama

    02/05/2010 1:27:30 PM PST · by Merciful_Friend · 5 replies · 238+ views
    The Cinch Review ^ | 02/05/2010 | Cinch
    Whaddya know? President Obama is talking up the economy. Based on a drop in the official unemployment rate to just below 10% (9.7%, to be exact), the president said today that "we are climbing out of the huge hole that we found ourselves in." Of-course, one can't miss the knock at the previous administration even in such a short statement, and even one designed to be cheering. Still, while his optimism is dubious, to say the least (on a day when total job losses during this recession were corrected up to 8.4 million from 7.2, and when his own budget...
  • Fort Hood / JimRob connection?

    12/01/2009 1:35:18 PM PST · by CardCarryingMember.VastRightWC · 28 replies · 1,084+ views
    12/1/2009 | Moi
    Fort Hood / JimRob Connection? Much has been said about Nidal Hasan's name appearing on p. 29 of that notorious "Homeland Security" thinktank's report. But did you know that on page 34 is this? -       James Robinson (Denver Health) In all likelihood, this is one and the same JR, since it's such a rarely seen name, and since Denver is practically right next door to Sacremento. This poses some serious questions, folks! What were JR and NH doing at the same conference, and when did they know it? What does this say about N. Hasan's connection with...
  • Bear mauls terrorists in Kashmir

    11/02/2009 10:30:58 PM PST · by raj bhatia · 27 replies · 2,100+ views ^ | 11/02/09 | Mukhtar Ahmad
    Two terrorists were mauled to death and another seriously wounded after a bear attacked their hideout in a forest area in south Kashmir [ Images ], a senior police officer said. He said the bear as per the intercepts of militants attacked a hideout of the Hizbul Mujaheedin outfit in the forest area near Damhal Hanjipora in south Kashmir Shopian district.
  • CIA Offers to Determine When Pelosi Knew

    05/12/2009 10:03:58 AM PDT · by Sub-Driver · 15 replies · 1,119+ views
    Scrappleface ^ | Scott Ott
    CIA Offers to Determine When Pelosi Knew by Scott Ott for ScrappleFace (2009-05-12) — In an effort to clarify exactly when House Speaker Nancy Pelosi knew that the U.S. employed enhanced interrogation techniques, like waterboarding, on terrorists, the CIA today offered to question the California Democrat. “With the passage of time, memory gets clouded,” said a CIA source who spoke on condition of anonymity. “But we have learned how to clear away the clouds, and bring into sharp focus the relevant details.” Rep. Pelosi initially said she had not been briefed on the harsh interrogation methods, then said she thought...
  • Biden: Don't ride subway

    04/30/2009 4:12:24 AM PDT · by mft112345 · 64 replies · 3,055+ views
    The Today Show ^ | 4/30/2009 | Today show
    Joe Biden just told people not to ride the subway or ride airplanes. He also called Matt "Sam".
  • The Chili Cook-Off Story - Hilarious!

    04/06/2009 3:15:23 PM PDT · by Notoriously Conservative · 34 replies · 2,022+ views
    Frank: "Recently, I was honored to be selected as a judge at a chile cook-off. The original person called in sick at the last moment, and I happened to be standing there at the judge's table, asking for directions to the Coors Light truck, when the call came in. I was assured by the other two judges (Native New Mexicans) that the chili wouldn't be all that spicy; and, besides, they told me I could have free beer during the tasting, so I accepted and became Judge 3." Here are the scorecard notes from the event: CHILE # 1 -...
  • Re: McCain's dangerous choice

    08/30/2008 1:51:30 PM PDT · by Jim Robinson · 85 replies · 492+ views
    email from | 8/30/2008 | Ilyse, Noah, Justin, Karin and the rest of the team
    Dear MoveOn member, Yesterday was John McCain's 72nd birthday. If elected, he'd be the oldest president ever inaugurated. And after months of slamming Barack Obama for "inexperience," here's who John McCain has chosen to be one heartbeat away from the presidency: a right-wing religious conservative with no foreign policy experience, who until recently was mayor of a town of 9,000 people. Huh? Who is Sarah Palin? Here's some basic background: She was elected Alaska's governor a little over a year and a half ago. Her previous office was mayor of Wasilla, a small town outside Anchorage. She has no foreign...
  • Elizabeth Kucinich: My Husband Would "Absolutely" Consider Running With Ron Paul

    11/24/2007 8:27:46 AM PST · by KJC1 · 109 replies · 134+ views
    YouTube ^ | 11-23-2007
    Click the link to watch. The video is over 3 minutes long, and the part where Elizabeth Kucinich said this is at about "-1:00."
  • Mitt Romney - a Newt conservative with sex appeal

    11/15/2006 11:28:58 AM PST · by teddyballgame · 283 replies · 4,155+ views
    American Thinker ^ | 11/15/06 | James Lewis
    Suppose the GOP candidate in ‘08 were a conservative who communicates better than George W., has excellent executive experience, knows how to appeal to a wide range of voters, and runs on constructive conservative ideas? Of all the current candidates, only Governor Mitt Romney fits that bill. With Hillary heading the Dem pack, a strong GOP candidate is essential. We live in dangerous times, and the Dems are still hiding their heads in the sand—so a strong GOP president in 2008 may turn out to be crucial for national security. Romney is a personally attractive candidate, but he’s more than...
  • Dixie Chicks documentary could be election issue

    08/22/2006 11:30:09 AM PDT · by presidio9 · 125 replies · 3,334+ views
    Reuters ^ | 08/22/06 | Gregg Goldstein
    The politically charged documentary "Dixie Chicks: Shut Up and Sing" has been picked up for worldwide distribution by the Weinstein Co. A release is tentatively scheduled for the fall, possibly right before the November elections. The film revolves around the aftermath of singer Natalie Maines' statement at a 2003 London concert, where she said, "Just so you know, we're ashamed the president of the United States is from Texas." It chronicles death threats, political attacks and radio boycotts against the country trio, and that could make the film a political hot potato as well as potential ammo should longtime Democratic...
  • Dems Tried To Stall Alito Hearings (HILARIOUS STUFF MUST READ!)

    01/25/2006 6:47:01 AM PST · by areafiftyone · 76 replies · 1,455+ views
    WAZZADEM ^ | 1/25/06
    Apparently, C-Span has been editing its coverage of the Senate Judiciary Committee hearings on the Alito nomination. Here's the tape they don't want you to see. At this time the Chair recognizes the senator from Delaware - Senator Biden.     I'll be with you shortly.     Senator, this committe is in session, so if you're not prepared, we'll come back to you later.     Just hold on, I think I'm almost done.     I'd like to remind my good friend that we don't have time to wait for him while he...     And I'd like to remind my good friend that the American people want...
  • George (GALLOWAY) Is In Big Bother

    01/13/2006 3:43:14 AM PST · by MadIvan · 23 replies · 603+ views
    Sky News ^ | January 13, 2006 | Staff
    George Galloway being petted by Rula Lenska A petition is being launched in the House of Commons accusing the Respect MP George Galloway of egotism for taking part in Celebrity Big Brother. Cabinet minister Hilary Armstrong has accused him of missing a debate in the House of Commons on the Crossrail project. The scheme directly affects his constituency in East London. The petition reads: "We believe this egotistical action shows a shameful lack of respect for the people of this constituency. "We call on him to represent and respect his constituents, not further his own ego, as he is...
  • Islam Launches ‘Responsibility’ PR Campaign

    11/10/2005 2:34:24 PM PST · by NYTexan · 22 replies · 584+ views ^ | 2005-11-10 | Scott Ott
    In an effort to “make lemonade from lemons”, an international coalition of Islamic sects today announced it would launch a sophisticated new public relations campaign to burnish the religion’s image by capitalizing on the popular association of Islam with “responsibility.” The move comes in the wake of riots by Muslim youth in France and major bombings by Muslim suicide bombers in Jordan and Iraq. “Our research shows that people associate Mormons with family, Buddhists and Hindus with non-violence and Muslims with responsibility,” said an unnamed spokesman for Federated Islamic Religious Entities. “When major news breaks around the world, it’s usually...
  • Poll results of West Wing Viewers under age 30 - A big swing to the right.

    11/08/2005 4:16:11 PM PST · by Stillwillin · 38 replies · 2,204+ views
    The Washington Post ^ | Tuesday, November 8, 2005 | Lisa de Moraes
    ...pollster Zogby yesterday, showing how much ground Smits's Santos lost to Alda's Vinick in the debate, despite obvious efforts to make Santos look heroic. Before the episode, viewers between 18 and 29 preferred Santos over Vinick, 54 percent to 37 percent. But after the debate, in which veteran Alda gutted pretty-boy Smits without him even knowing it, Vinick now leads among viewers under age 30, 56 percent to 42 percent.
  • Cindy Sheehan for President [LOL Alert]

    11/01/2005 10:27:40 AM PST · by advance_copy · 70 replies · 1,990+ views
    Village Voice ^ | 11/1/05 | Kristen Lombardi
    Cindy Sheehan, a/k/a the "peace mom," probably never intended to sound like a candidate, but she did. Sheehan, the activist who became the face of anti-war sentiment after camping outside President Bush's ranch in Crawford, Texas, last summer, had just mounted the podium at the Brooklyn Peace Fair on October 22. And already she was getting political. "Maybe later we'll talk about your senators," she said, provoking a wave of booing and hissing from the 200-plus crowd. Sheehan, whose 24-year-old son Casey was killed in Iraq in April 2004, was referring to both of New York's "pro-war Democrats," as she...
  • Will you pay to read the NYT online? (NYT TO CHARGE $49.95 FOR COLUMNISTS, ETC., STARTING MON.)

    09/17/2005 3:23:28 PM PDT · by paulat · 132 replies · 2,278+ views
    The New York Times ^ | 9/17/05 | Leonard M. Apcar
    Letter From the Editor On Monday, Sept. 19, will launch a new subscription service, TimesSelect, an important step in the development of The New York Times. Subscribers to TimesSelect will have exclusive online access to many of our most influential columnists in Op-Ed, Business, New York/Region and Sports. In addition to reading the columns, TimesSelect subscribers can also engage with our columnists through video interviews and Web-only postings. All of our news, features, editorials and analysis will remain free to readers of, as will our interactive graphics, multimedia and popular video minutes. [snip]
  • Boy Who Fired Bottle Rockets Into Traffic Dies While Fleeing From Angry Driver

    07/15/2005 1:39:35 PM PDT · by TheOtherOne · 263 replies · 7,374+ views
    AP ^ | AP-ES-07-15-05 1528EDT
    Boy Who Fired Bottle Rockets Into Traffic Dies While Fleeing From Angry Driver The Associated Press Published: Jul 15, 2005 SPANAWAY, Wash. (AP) - A 12-year-old boy who was firing bottle rockets at cars was chased into traffic Friday by an angry driver and killed by another car, authorities said. The driver and his passenger, both 22, were arrested for investigation of manslaughter, the Washington State Patrol said. The death came soon after midnight in this small town south of Tacoma, where the preteen and a 12-year-old cousin had been hiding in bushes while shooting the bottle rockets, trooper Johnny...
  • NY Judge Bans Heterosexual Marriage

    02/05/2005 4:56:00 AM PST · by FlyLow · 18 replies · 976+ views
    Scrappleface ^ | 2-5-05 | Scott Ott
    (2005-02-05) -- A day after ruling that New York City must allow homosexual marriages, a state judge today declared traditional heterosexual marriage unconstitutional. "Homosexual marriage rests on the bedrock of judicial opinion," wrote Justice Doris Ling-Cohan, "But heterosexual marriage finds justification in little more than religious myth, antiquated tradition and a few unconstitutional state and local laws. These are all hollow arguments when compared with the firm foundation provided by a growing number of judges." In a 57-page ruling, Judge Ling-Cohan ordered the state of New York to "cease and desist issuing marriage licenses to counter-sex (man-woman) couples and to...
  • INCOMINGS! (This has to be one of the funniest photos EVER! - not a bad idea, either!)

    12/12/2004 3:39:43 PM PST · by CHARLITE · 90 replies · 9,028+ views
    Private Email | DECEMBER 12, 2004 | UNKNOWN
    Step 1. Tie balloons to car. Step 2. Drive like a bat out of hell.... Step 3. Watch people freak out !!!!

    11/29/2004 11:04:03 AM PST · by areafiftyone · 109 replies · 6,030+ views
    Newsmax ^ | 11/28/04
    Rev. Jesse Jackson has joined the move by the Kerry campaign and state Democratic Party officials to press for a recount in Ohio, telling supporters that the race there "has not yet been [decided] because of so many irregularities 26 days after the election." Jackson said in a telephone interview that he was organizing "a kind of statewide sharing of experiences" that would mobilize citizens and result in "collective state action," according to the Cincinnati Post. "We are pulling people together from around the state," he explained. The civil rights leader called on the Ohio Supreme Court to set aside...
  • Kucinich Talks About How He Can Win Democratic Nomination

    11/30/2003 9:27:10 PM PST · by yonif · 22 replies · 120+ views
    NewsNet5 ^ | November 30, 2003
    Dennis Kucinich is speaking out about why he thinks he can win the Democratic nomination for president and beat George W. Bush. He appeared on ABC's "This Week With George Stephanopoulos" on Sunday "I can bring Greens into the process. Those are a few percentage points. I can bring members of the Natural Law Party on sustainability issues; Reform Party members on trade issues; Libertarians on the Patriot Act and those issues," Kucinich said. "I'm the person, I think, who has the broadest appeal." He also said he has the broadest base of support among the Democratic candidates. Kucinich also...
  • Bill renames Nevada 'East California' (Legislator a Freeper?!)

    02/18/2003 2:49:04 PM PST · by adaven · 5 replies · 193+ views
    Nevada Appeal / Associated Press ^ | Feb 18, 2003 | BRENDAN RILEY
    An anonymous legislator has asked for a bill to change Nevada's name to East California and change the state song to "The Tax Man" -- teasing Gov. Kenny Guinn about his $1 billion tax proposal. The name change was on a list of bill draft requests from individual lawmakers. While many proposals name the legislator who requested the draft, it's not required, and there was no name on the "East California" request. Guinn didn't seem amused. Greg Bortolin, the Republican governor's press secretary, said, "In these economic hard times, it's tragic that we're wasting money on things like this." "Further,...
  • Major tried it with Sun girl (BIG BLUE UNDERPANTS ALERT, PART 2)

    10/02/2002 12:51:59 AM PDT · by MadIvan · 52 replies · 826+ views
    The Sun ^ | October 2, 2002 | John Kay
    Impressed ... new PM John Major with Caroline Graham at the 1991 interview where he complimented her legs LOVE cheat John Major turned on his saucy charm with a writer from The Sun — then begged us not to spill the beans, we can reveal today. The then-Tory Premier flirted outrageously with former Sun Woman editor Caroline Graham during a fireside chat at Number Ten. Major, 59, now reeling from the revelations of his secret four-year affair with Edwina Currie, could not take his eyes off Caroline who was wearing a micro-skirt which rode up to reveal her thighs....
  • Westminster's odd couple (MAJOR, CURRIE AND ONE LINERS OF THE DAY)

    09/28/2002 12:15:55 PM PDT · by MadIvan · 35 replies · 353+ views
    BBC News ^ | September 28, 2002 | Nick Assinder
    John Major and Edwina Currie were lovers. No - not even writing it down makes it any less mind bending. The man who tucked his vest into his underpants had a four year affair with the most outspoken and sexually interested woman of her political generation - a sort of Essex girl Margaret Thatcher. It's like learning that Betty Boop had been doing it with Elmer Fudd all those years. This line is still making me howl with laughter - Ivan No wonder they kept it quiet for so long. And it's still hard to decide which one of them...