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Keyword: stupid

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  • Executive Order Authorizing Martial Law Called “Routine”

    03/25/2012 2:50:07 PM PDT · by John Semmens · 15 replies · 3+ views
    Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 24 March 2012 | John Semmens
    Last weekend’s issuance of an Executive Order giving the President the option of declaring an emergency and taking control over all food, energy, water, transportation and any other materials was described as “routine” by Presidential Press Secretary Jay Carney. “The President has obligations to the American people,” Carney observed. “He would like the cooperation of Congress in his efforts to fulfill these obligations. But as we have seen, there are many in Congress who have labored to obstruct these efforts. The President needs to have latitude to act.” “It would be best for members of Congress to consider this Executive...
  • Healthcare Mandate Decision Final Says White House

    03/18/2012 11:04:13 AM PDT · by John Semmens · 13 replies · 1+ views
    Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 17 March 2012 | John Semmens
    Press Secretary Jay Carney advised those critical of the Administration’s decision to make insurers cover birth control devices and drugs to “give it a rest.” “Look, the President is sorry that some consider this action to be insensitive to their personal or religious beliefs,” Carney said. “But they certainly cannot expect him to subjugate his policy aims to these beliefs.” Carney suggested that critics “may want to reexamine the issue. Does the Bible explicitly prohibit birth control, or for that matter, abortion? I don’t recall ever having read that Jesus gave any commandments on these matters. I think His wish...
  • Japan's lost libido and America's asexual future

    03/12/2012 9:22:02 AM PDT · by Mrs. Don-o · 150 replies
    Asia Times ^ | March 13, 2012 | Spengler
    [According to] a Japanese government study: Almost a third of Japanese boys aged 16-20 and three-fifths of girls say that they have no interest in sex. The hormones of late adolescence evidently rage in vain against some cultural barrier that makes young Japanese "despise" sexual relations, according to the Japan Family Planning Association's report [1]. It turns out that the ultimate victim of sexual revolution is sex itself. What makes the Japanese hate sex? The same things that make a growing proportion of Americans hate sex. Joan Sewell's 2007 book I'd Rather Eat Chocolate became the manifesto of American women...
  • President Calls Oil “Fuel of the Past”

    03/11/2012 2:32:58 PM PDT · by John Semmens · 28 replies
    Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 10 March 2012 | John Semmens
    President Obama begged voters to back his vision of an oil-free future for America. “There will come a day when we will wean ourselves from this fuel of the past,” Obama proclaimed. “Reliance on oil-based fuels has lulled us into lives of gluttony and waste. We have gotten soft because we drive when we should walk. We have gotten lazy because it’s easier to turn up the thermostat than to put on a sweater.” “There are environmentally-friendly ways for us to live,” the president continued. “I see a future when mighty vessels powered by the wind carry goods and people...
  • Women’s Rights May Be Sacrificed for Peace in Afghanistan

    03/10/2012 2:10:42 PM PST · by John Semmens · 17 replies
    Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 10 March 2012 | John Semmens
    Afghan President Hamid Karzai says that “it may be necessary for us to roll back the freedoms and privileges we extended to women if we want to persuade the Taliban to come to terms with us.” Karzai characterized the freedoms granted to women over the last decade as “an experiment that is not working. Allowing women to go out in public uncovered and unaccompanied is a Western imposition that is out of step with our fundamental traditions. We will never have peace if we attempt to persist with such offensive alien ideas. Bringing women back under the discipline of sharia...
  • Congress approves punitive tariffs against China

    03/09/2012 11:37:47 AM PST · by 1rudeboy · 52 replies · 1+ views
    AP ^ | March 9, 2012 | Jim Abrams
    WASHINGTON (AP) — Congress on Tuesday overturned a court decision and reaffirmed that the government has the right to impose higher tariffs on goods from China and other state-run economies that subsidize their exports to the United States. The House voted 370-39 to pass the measure and send it to President Barack Obama for his signature. The Senate approved it Monday on a voice vote with no debate. "By passing this law, Congress has taken a clear stand against the unfair trade practices that have put countless American jobs in jeopardy," Vice President Joe Biden said in a statement. The...
  • Topic: A Cowboy named Bud (Humor about government)

    03/09/2012 10:44:43 AM PST · by Texas Fossil · 5 replies
    Conservative Political Forum ^ | February 29, 2012 | Ford289HiPo
    A cowboy named Bud was overseeing his herd in a remote mountainous pasture in Montana when suddenly a brand-new BMW advanced toward him out of a cloud of dust. The driver, a young man in a Brioni® suit, Gucci® shoes, RayBan® sunglasses and YSL® tie, leaned out the window and asked the cowboy, "If I tell you exactly how many cows and calves you have in your herd, will you give me a calf?" Bud looks at the man, who obviously is a yuppie, then looks at his peacefully grazing herd and calmly answers, "Sure, why not?" The yuppie parks...
  • Investigation of Obama’s Credentials Called Racist

    03/04/2012 11:20:18 AM PST · by John Semmens · 11 replies
    Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 3 March 2012 | John Semmens
    Maricopa County Sheriff Joe Arpaio’s six-month long investigation into the authenticity of President Obama’s birth certificate recently concluded with a finding of “probable cause” to believe this document is a forgery. Arpaio said that “forensics experts were able to determine that the birth certificate released by the White House was a computer-generated collage, not a genuine copy of an actual document. The President may or may not have been born in Hawaii. The documents he has provided to-date do not serve as proof that he is eligible for the office he now holds.” While declining to address any of Arpaio’s...
  • Congresswoman Looking into Broader Health Mandate

    03/03/2012 12:29:29 PM PST · by John Semmens · 12 replies · 1+ views
    Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 3 March 2012 | John Semmens
    Former House Speaker Nancy Pelosi (D-Calif) says the furor over the President’s declaration that all insurers must offer birth control coverage free-of-charge is “helping highlight a broader divide between those who really care about the welfare of people and those who don’t.” “Look, 90% of Catholic women use birth control,” Pelosi maintained. “This is a huge majority. In our form of government the majority rules. The President’s executive order requiring insurers to cover the cost of birth control meets the needs of this majority. Those who oppose this are placing the rights of the 10% minority ahead of the rights...
  • (Liberals) Working Hard To Be Stupid?

    03/01/2012 4:52:50 PM PST · by The Looking Spoon · 1 replies · 2+ views
    The Looking Spoon ^ | 3-1-12 | The Looking Spoon
  • OBAMA: STUPID OR EVIL?

    02/28/2012 7:23:40 PM PST · by SaveOurRepublicFromTyranny · 68 replies
    Red County ^ | February 28, 2012 | Matthew Burke
    Perhaps the question for our times is whether President Obama is just stupid for the imbecilic policies he's both proposed and implemented, or whether he's something much more sinister, even evil. Is he intentionally destroying the country, both economically and constitutionally, or is he just, as some would suggest, simply overly naive or misinformed? Not only have I repeatedly pondered the question, but many people I know have asked me the same question. Or, is Obama, as Mitt Romney suggests, simply "over his head"?
  • White House Refuses to Comply with Another Subpoena

    02/26/2012 10:43:19 AM PST · by John Semmens · 10 replies
    Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 24 Feb 2012 | John Semmens
    Citing what it called a key precedent recently established by a Georgia case, the Obama Administration declined to submit documents subpoenaed by the House Energy and Commerce Committee investigating the loss of over $500 million of taxpayers’ money on the Administration’s Solyndra loan guarantee. “If you will recall,” Press Secretary Jay Carney told Committee Chairman Representative Fred Upton (R-Mich), “the Administration’s refusal to provide documents or even to appear in answer to a subpoena was upheld by Judge Milihi’s decision in the President’s favor.” “It’s a separation of powers issue,” Carney explained. “The president was independently elected by the American...
  • “Taxes Are what You Pay for the Privilege of Being an American” Says Geithner

    02/26/2012 1:05:13 PM PST · by John Semmens · 47 replies
    Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 24 Feb 2012 | John Semmens
    US Treasury Secretary Timothy Geithner advised taxpayers to “quit complaining, taxes are what you pay for the privilege of being an American.” “You know, there are places in the world where the government can take everything you have,” Geithner observed. “The fact that you get to keep anything here ought to inspire a greater appreciation for your own government’s forbearance.” The Secretary warned those he called the “one-percenters,” that “government is the only thing preventing the other 99% from murdering you and looting your property. The protection we offer ought to be worth whatever it costs. Quibbling over the price...
  • Over a Million US Families Living on Less than $2 a Day

    02/24/2012 9:30:01 PM PST · by John Semmens · 67 replies
    Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 24 Feb 2012 | John Semmens
    A US Census Bureau study indicated that an estimated 1.46 million families in the United States are now living on less than $2 per day. This is more than twice as many as the estimated 636,000 families that were living at a like standard in 1996. Health and Human Services Secretary Kathleen Sebelius hailed the report as “a tribute to the affirmative steps taken by this Administration to lower the cost of living. Critics have been quick to harp on the negatives of high unemployment, declining wages, and falling home values as if that were the total picture. We’re hoping...
  • 'Stupid' and Oil Prices, Obama's Forrest Gump analysis of rising gas prices.

    02/24/2012 9:02:50 AM PST · by Nachum · 9 replies
    wsk ^ | 2/24/12 | staff
    'The American people aren't stupid," thundered President Obama yesterday in Miami, ridiculing Republicans who are blaming him for rising gasoline prices. Let's hope he's right, because not even Forrest Gump could believe the logic of what Mr. Obama is trying to sell. To wit, that a) gasoline prices are beyond his control, but b) to the extent oil and gas production is rising in America, his energy policies deserve all the credit, and c) higher prices are one more reason to raise taxes on oil and gas drillers while handing even more subsidies to his friends in green energy. Where...
  • Two Western Journalists Killed in Syria Shelling

    02/22/2012 4:17:45 AM PST · by nuconvert · 15 replies
    NYTimes ^ | Feb. 22, 2012
    -excerpt- Valérie Pécresse, the French government spokeswoman, identified the dead as Marie Colvin, an American reporter working for The Sunday Times of London, and Rémi Ochlik, a French photographer. -excerpt- Video footage posted on social networking sites showed what seemed to be two bodies lying face down in rubble inside a building identified in news reports as a makeshift media center in a beleaguered neighborhood of Homs, where rebels have been under sustained fire for almost three weeks. Three other Western journalists were injured in the attack, activists said. According to his Web site, Mr. Ochlik, in his late twenties,...
  • Gingrich: "Utterly Stupid" To Say US Can't Control The Border (video)

    02/22/2012 5:59:22 PM PST · by Nachum · 23 replies · 1+ views
    Real Clear Politics ^ | 2/22/12 | staff
    Newt Gingrich on the US' inability to secure the southern border.
  • Capitol Police Arrest Pro-Life Demonstrators Near White House

    02/18/2012 2:22:50 PM PST · by John Semmens · 11 replies
    Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 18 Feb 2012 | John Semmens
    Six pro-life demonstrators were arrested for holding a prayer vigil on the sidewalk outside the White House earlier this week. All were released after paying a ransom of $100 apiece. One of the arrestees, Fr. Denis Wilde, the Associate Director of Priests for Life, pointed out the disparities between how his small protest was handled when compared to the police response to the Occupy Wall Street protest. “Occupy Wall Street protesters have been occupying federal property for months, but when we kneel in prayer, the police are called in and we are arrested,” Father Wilde complained. Spokesman for the Capitol...
  • Appeals Court Blocks California Ban on Same-Sex “Marriage”

    02/12/2012 5:28:46 PM PST · by John Semmens · 8 replies
    Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 10 Feb 2012 | John Semmens
    The 9th Circuit Federal Appeals Court upheld District Court Judge Vaughn Walker’s overturning of the voter-approved amendment (Proposition 8) banning the state’s recognition of same-sex “marriage.” “Voters have no right to amend their state’s constitution in ways that contradict clearly established federal policies,” the Court wrote in its decision. “To allow such ‘willy-nilly’ revisions on a state-by-state basis would lead to a patchwork of divergent laws across the nation. Things that are permitted in some states might be disallowed in others. Uniformity and equality of rights throughout the 50 states would be sacrificed to a misguided notion of state and...
  • Obama Strives to Overcome “Checks-and-Balances” Impediments to Change

    02/11/2012 12:22:30 PM PST · by John Semmens · 2 replies
    Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 10 Feb 2012 | John Semmens
    President Barack Obama tried to console frustrated supporters by placing blame for the slow pace of change on the nation’s “founding fathers.” “You and I know what needs to be done to bring social justice to every American,” the President observed. “But our enemies in Congress and the states are exploiting loopholes left in the Constitution by our nation’s early leaders. The requirement that laws must be approved by both houses of Congress enables obstructionists to block the mandate I received from voters in 2008. The autonomy granted the states under the Tenth Amendment insulates them from total compliance with...