Free Republic 3rd Quarter Fundraising Target: $88,000 Receipts & Pledges to-date: $27,930
31%  
Woo hoo!! And the first 31% is in!! Thank you all very much!! God bless.

Keyword: wasteoftime

Brevity: Headers | « Text »
  • CAUGHT ON VIDEO=> #NeverTrump Commies Push Elderly Veteran Off Ledge at RNC

    07/23/2016 12:41:08 PM PDT · by KentTrappedInLiberalSeattle · 62 replies
    GatewayPundit ^ | 07/23/2016 | Jim Hoft
    This was DISGUSTING!The RevCom Communists held several rallies at the RNC in Cleveland this past week. During one demonstration this #NeverTrump group pushed an elderly US veteran off a ledge. They wouldn’t let the man move on the on their platform and then pushed him off the ledge. AWFUL! Via Rebel Pundit [VIDEO].
  • How's 'bout them Cowboys!!!!

    07/11/2016 3:23:03 PM PDT · by Bender2 · 37 replies
    How's 'bout them Cowboys!!!!
  • LIVE: Ted Cruz to rally Maryland voters in Towson Monday

    04/18/2016 10:51:33 AM PDT · by justlittleoleme · 111 replies
    ABC 2 WMAR ^ | 4/18/16
    Republican presidential candidate Ted Cruz is scheduled to rally Maryland voters in Towson Monday. The Cruz rally is set to begin at 1:30 p.m. at the Towson American Legion. WATCH LIVE (at above link)
  • Free Republic Caucus 2016 04/10

    04/09/2016 8:59:58 PM PDT · by DoughtyOne · 167 replies
    My own workup | 04/10/2016 | DoughtyOne / for Free Republic
    Welcome to the Free Republic CaucusPlease read the rules, and participate according to the guidelines provided.  Thank you. REMEMBER:  To find the Caucus thread for the day, Search "Caucus" The New York (95) Primary takes place in nine days. Only vote on this thread on: 04/10/2016  another thread will pop up moments before: 04/11/2016Wait to vote until 12:00 midnight EST, and don't vote after 12:00 midnight EST at the at the end of the day.  Look for the new thread. Votes outside the 24 hour period, will not be counted.  Give it three minutes or so on each end, so you...
  • Free Republic 2016 Caucus Open Discussion Thread LXXXIII

    04/10/2016 9:22:54 PM PDT · by Lonely Bull · 13 replies
    Free Republic ^ | 10 April 2016 | Windflier
    DO NOT VOTE ON THIS THREAD. This is the nightly DISCUSSION thread for the ongoing 2016 Free Republic Caucus. Per caucus rules, no comments are allowed on the caucus thread itself - hence this open chat thread. If you'd like to vote in the caucus, please look in the sidebar for the link, or check downthread here. Thanks, and let 'er rip! Windy Free Republic Caucus 2016 04/11
  • Stay Thirsty, My Friend

    03/13/2016 7:40:16 AM PDT · by NOBO2012 · 12 replies
    Michelle Obama's Mirror ^ | 3-13-2016 | MOTUS
    It’s Sunday, we’re still recovering from yet another week of gob smacking, and as if that weren’t enough, we’ve also been forced to sacrifice a precious hour to the Daylight Savings gods. For no apparently good reason.So we’re going to go easy on the politics today. Although I do have a suggestion for the GOPe; if they really don’t want to back Trump, I’ve located the only man in the world who can beat him, and the good news is - he’s going to be available soon!That’s right,only The Most Interesting Man In The World can beat The Donald at...
  • Cruz Campaign Capitalizes on Carson's In experience

    11/30/2015 8:07:23 AM PST · by conservativejoy · 12 replies
    Virginia Right ^ | 11/28/2015 | Opinion Staff
    Senator Cruz continues to capitalize on Dr. Ben Carson’s inexperience, gaining ground against Carson in Massachusetts. In October, Massachusetts polling data showed Trump with 48%, Carson with 14%, Rubio with 12%, and Cruz with only 5%. In one month, Trump has dropped to 32%, Rubio up to 18%, Cruz at 10%, and Carson dropping all the way to 5%. Now, this early polling in Massachusetts isn't a good gauge of anything in a vacuum, but considering what we're seeing in other polls, it appears that Senator Cruz is directly siphoning off votes from Carson. Obviously, Ted Cruz and Ben Carson...
  • Ben Carson’s “Red Herring” fishing fleet

    11/15/2015 8:21:52 AM PST · by Oldpuppymax · 11 replies
    Coach is Right ^ | 11/15/15 | Kevin "Coach" Collins
    The tenor of our times requires this disclaimer: I think Ben Carson is a nice man who got attacked with phony charges regarding whether or not he was offered a chance to go to West Point. Oh, and I think he is brilliant. Now that Carson-the RNC’s current favor of the month-has bombed once again in the latest Republican candidates’ debate the man they are hoping will derail Donald Trump needs lots of help. In five available public polls Carson registered an anemic 5.5% of those who voted. In a Yougov.com survey released Wednesday morning on the question of who...
  • Rand Paul Wants GOP To Join Black Lives Matter Town Hall

    11/05/2015 8:58:34 PM PST · by 2ndDivisionVet · 30 replies
    The Huffington Post Huffpost Politics ^ | November 5, 2015 | Philip Lewis
    Sen. Rand Paul (R-Ky.) said Thursday he is on board with participating in a hypothetical Black Lives Matter presidential forum, saying it would be a good idea for the Republican Party to take issues of criminal justice reform seriously. "If we were smart, we would do it," the GOP presidential candidate said during an interview on NewsOne Now. "They are drawing attention to issues that need to be drawn to." Both the Democratic and Republican National Committees have agreed to promote presidential town halls set up by Black Lives Matter activists. But the movement's organizers have pushed back against the...
  • You Want to Put E15 in Your Motor?

    09/18/2015 1:48:24 AM PDT · by RaceBannon · 48 replies
    The Jacki Daily Show ^ | 8/31/15 | Lauren Fix
    Lauren Fix, “The Car Coach” is a competitive race car racer, a mom, and America’s top woman in automotive news. She explains E15, and why it will invalidate the warranty for most cars.
  • GOP Debate: Fox News Down; Cruz, Walker Up

    08/07/2015 1:16:43 PM PDT · by HomerBohn · 52 replies
    GOP USA ^ | 8/7/2015 | Bobby Eberle
    The first Republican presidential debate is now in the books, and there is plenty to talk about. From a bizarre line of opening questions to, at times, combative exchanges, the debate had a little bit of everything. Did Donald Trump maintain his front-runner status? Did anyone pull off a surprise? Several candidates shined in the spotlight, and when it was all said and done, the biggest loser was Fox News. As the debate was about to start, the Fox News team of Bret Baier, Megyn Kelly, and Chris Wallace seemed almost giddy. It was a strange tone, as if they...
  • What We Learned About Waco This Weekend

    07/12/2015 5:43:25 PM PDT · by JJ_Folderol · 46 replies
    The Aging Rebel ^ | July 12, 2015 | The Aging Rebel
    The Twin Peaks Massacre has always, clearly, been an ATF or FBI operation gone terribly wrong. The Waco police and most of official Waco have been lying about it since May 17. A couple of pieces of evidence became generally available this weekend that shine a little light into this black hole of deceit. First, it is now absolutely inarguable that at least 182 people were arrested on May 17 and that five of them were “unarrested” by 5:28 a.m. the next morning. In an early morning fax from Waco Detective Sam Key to lay Justice of the Peace “Pete”...
  • Report: NYC Cops Arrested Men for ‘Manspreading’ on the Subway

    05/30/2015 11:21:40 AM PDT · by EveningStar · 89 replies
    National Review ^ | May 28, 2015 | Katherine Timpf
    Smash the patriarchy! New York police allegedly arrested two men for “manspreading” (sitting with their legs far apart) on the subway, according to a report entitled “That’s How They Get You” released by the Police Reform Organizing Project. “On a recent visit to the arraignment part in Brooklyn’s criminal court, PROP volunteers observed that police officers had arrested two Latino men on the charge of ‘man spreading’ on the subway, presumably because they were taking up more than one seat and therefore inconveniencing other riders,” the report states.
  • U.S. military starts training Syria fighters to combat Islamic State

    05/07/2015 11:15:02 AM PDT · by McGruff · 21 replies
    REUTERS ^ | May 7, 2015 | DASHA AFANASIEVA AND PHIL STEWART
    The U.S. military has started training Syrian fighters to combat Islamic State militants, officials said on Thursday, adding the program had begun in Jordan and would soon launch in Turkey. The U.S. plan to train and arm a force that is expected to eventually total more than 15,000 troops is a major test of President Barack Obama's strategy in Syria, which critics say is too limited to influence events.
  • (Satire): FBI Admits All Registered Motorcycle Owners Are On Classified Gang List

    03/27/2015 9:11:07 AM PDT · by Baynative · 102 replies
    WaPo ^ | 2/26/15 | N/A
    MSNBC correspondent Jeremy Lancaster sat down with government official Darrin Cornia to discuss recent rumors that have been in circulation in regard to registered motorcycle owners being placed on a classified FBI gang list. After a few moments of introduction, Lancaster bluntly asked the following question,” Mr. Cornia, if I were to make the statement, all registered motorcycle owners are currently showing on a classified FBI gang list, would the statement be true or false? Cornia responded by saying, “That would be a true statement, the FBI has been collecting and compiling Department of Motor Vehicles and Drivers License Division...
  • DOJ to Announce No Charges in Trayvon Martin's Death

    02/24/2015 9:59:18 AM PST · by SoFloFreeper · 91 replies
    ABC "News" ^ | 2/24/15
    ....ABC News has learned Martin’s family will soon be notified that the Justice Department will not be filing charges against George Zimmerman, who shot the 17-year-old after a confrontation in 2012. Thursday marks three years to the day since Martin was killed. Federal prosecutors concluded there is not sufficient evidence to prove Zimmerman, a neighborhood watchman in Sanford, Fla., intentionally violated Martin’s civil rights, sources told ABC News.
  • Lawmakers revive bid to rename Alaska’s Mount McKinley

    02/06/2015 7:20:16 AM PST · by Olog-hai · 95 replies
    Associated Press ^ | Feb 5, 2015 6:26 PM EST
    Lawmakers have failed in past attempts to rename North America’s highest mountain, but a new proposal may have a better chance this year under a Republican Congress, according to an aide to an Alaska lawmaker who is resurrecting the effort. U.S. Sens. Lisa Murkowski and Dan Sullivan have introduced a bill to give Mount McKinley its historical Alaska Native name. The Alaska Republicans announced a Senate bill Wednesday to formally call the 20,320-foot mountain by its Athabascan name, Denali, KTUU reported. The bill comes after previous efforts by Murkowski failed. …
  • Newt Gingrich : 2014-10-04 : 11 GOP Principles for America

    10/04/2014 9:23:45 AM PDT · by Patton@Bastogne · 39 replies
    Newt Gingrich ^ | 2014-10-04 | Newt Gingrich
    . October 4, 2014 Newt Gingrich : 11 GOP Principles for America ===================================================== Republican Party Chairman Reince Priebus gave a very good speech yesterday focused on 11 principles for American renewal. They are eleven positive statements about what Republicans believe we must do about the challenges confronting America. Take a look at his list of Republican principles below. How many do you agree with? 1. Our Constitution should be preserved, valued and honored.2. We need to start growing America’s economy instead of Washington’s economy so that working Americans see better wages and more opportunity. 3. We need to pass a...
  • Gil Harrington tells @HenryGraff a forensic link has been made between #JesseMatthew and Morgan.

    09/29/2014 9:19:08 AM PDT · by fatima · 56 replies
    NBC29 ‏@NBC29 23m | NBC29
    NBC29 ‏@NBC29 23m BREAKING: Gil Harrington tells @HenryGraff a forensic link has been made between #JesseMatthew and Morgan.
  • President Obama Checks Stonehenge Off His Bucket List

    09/06/2014 10:56:27 AM PDT · by Steelfish · 55 replies
    ABCNews ^ | Sep 5, 2014 2:59pm | Ann Compton
    President Obama Checks Stonehenge Off His Bucket List By Ann Compton Sep 5, 2014 After a grueling week of foreign policy crises that must have often seemed like trying to push boulders up a mountain, President Obama took a surprise detour on the way home. Marine One flew him halfway across England so he could walk amid the mysterious and awe-inspiring boulders of Stonehenge. “Spectacular” he kept saying. The president walked alone amid the towering slabs at sunset, humbled. “How cool is this?” he asked.
  • Amnesty International Takes ‘Unprecedented’ Step in Sending Delegation to Ferguson

    08/18/2014 6:22:52 PM PDT · by markomalley · 49 replies
    KMOX ^ | 8/18/2014
    Human rights group Amnesty International has taken “unprecedented” action to deal with unrest in Ferguson by sending a delegation that has never before been deployed inside the United States.The organization has had members on the ground in Ferguson since Thursday, in the wake of the fatal shooting of 18-year-old Michael Brown by a Ferguson police officer. According to a news release, the 12-person delegation is there to “observe police and protester activity, gather testimony, seek meetings with officials and offer support to the community.”Organizers will also train local activists on methods of non-violent protest.“Law enforcement, from the FBI to state...
  • You’ll Never Guess Why Liberals Are Attacking This Business!

    07/30/2014 10:41:26 PM PDT · by Impala64ssa
    Politi Chicks ^ | 7/30/14 | Michele Holt
    We’ve been witnessing attacks against conservatives and their principles for quite some time so this recent example really should be of no surprise. Just this week on Twitter, liberal artist Cher went on her predictable tirade against Senator Rand Paul suggesting he was against civil rights for minorities. Of course she was lying and twisting her interpretation of what Sen. Paul’s stance is on the matter, but is that not what liberals in Hollywood and media are known for? Morris Communications is a multi-media conglomerate that seems to have been a recent target of liberal website Gawker as well as...
  • President Obama Hosting Concussions Summit At White House

    05/29/2014 8:25:49 AM PDT · by SoFloFreeper · 51 replies
    CBS NEW YORK ^ | 5/29/14
    ...on Thursday, Obama is hosting a summit with representatives of professional sports leagues, coaches, parents, young athletes, researchers and others to call attention to the issue of youth sports concussions....
  • 'They're Starting To Seriously Worry': Concern Growing About Low Turnout At Obama Inauguration

    01/06/2013 3:35:37 PM PST · by drewh · 120 replies
    UK Daily Mail ^ | 12:34 EST, 6 January 2013 | By Daily Mail Reporter and Associated Press
    Hotel rooms remain unbooked ahead of January 21 inauguration ceremony Organizers expecting much lower turnout than 2009 ceremony, when nearly 2 million people flocked to the National Mall Crowds may have flocked to the National Mall to see President Obama make history in 2009, but the team behind the president's 2013 inauguration bash later this month are bracing themselves for a ton of empty seats. The ceremony that Washington will stage in a few weeks won't be the historic affair it was in 2009, when nearly 2 million people flocked to the Capitol to watch Obama take the oath of...
  • President Obama To Receive Honorary Green Beret, Induction Into Special Forces Association

    08/30/2012 11:06:49 PM PDT · by Daffynition · 85 replies
    Theduffleblog.com ^ | August 30, 2012 | unknown
    Fort Bragg, NC – The White House Press Office announced today that President Obama will soon be inducted into the Special Forces Association and receive an honorary Green Beret. Officials have said the honor will be bestowed in an upcoming September 11th ceremony at Fort Bragg. The honorary beret comes in recognition of the President’s decisive role in covert operations throughout the world during his term — including the killing of Osama bin Laden last year in Pakistan, and his combat action in Afghanistan months ago.
  • States with Highest Unemployment Likely to Vote for Obama

    08/13/2012 10:07:43 AM PDT · by John Semmens · 8 replies
    Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 10 Aug 2012 | John Semmens
    Polling data shows that voters in the states with the most unemployment are leaning toward Obama. States with the lowest unemployment are leaning toward Romney. “These results only seem counter intuitive if you’re one of those who’s bought the GOP line that everyone wants to work,” Obama campaign adviser David Axelrod chortled. “I don’t know anyone who’s happy about getting out of bed and going to work everyday. The notion that this is something a person ought to do is pure propaganda. It might suit the corporate exploiters who hope to get cheap labor, but it doesn’t speak to the...
  • Massacre Spawns Demands for Gun Control

    07/30/2012 8:41:50 AM PDT · by John Semmens · 6 replies
    Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 28 July 2012 | John Semmens
    The massacre of a dozen movie-goers in Colorado has sparked another spate of liberal demands for gun control. University of Colorado Professor Chad Kautzer has launched an online petition aimed at banning “concealed carry laws.” While acknowledging that such a ban might not have stopped James Holmes from shooting 70 people in an Aurora, Colorado movie theater, Kautzer insisted that “the ability to add an illegal possession of a firearm charge to the list of offenses for which he will be prosecuted would have a deterrent effect.” In New York City, Mayor Michael Bloomberg suggested that police should go on...
  • Mainstream Media Accepts Government’s Right to Censor News

    07/28/2012 2:07:36 PM PDT · by John Semmens · 22 replies
    Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 28 July 2012 | John Semmens
    A recent New York Times article admitted that it, along with other major “news” outlets, allows the White House to censor what it publishes. The basic protocol is for the media to submit a draft of a proposed piece to the White House for review prior to publication. The White House then edits the piece and returns it. “It can be irksome at times,” Times reporter Jeremy Peters admitted. “But what choice do we have? If we don’t cooperate we’ll be cut off from access. And for what? It’s not as if we aren’t 100% behind the Administration on virtually...
  • Mayors Play Chicken with First Amendment Rights

    07/28/2012 11:20:40 AM PDT · by John Semmens · 12 replies
    Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 27 July 2012 | John Semmens
    Though it would seem that Chick-fil-A president Dan Cathy's opinion that marriage is an institution between one man and one woman is protected by the Constitution's First Amendment, mayors in three cities have vowed to punish this heresy. Chicago Mayor Rahm Emanuel says he “will do everything in my power to prevent such a vile establishment from setting up shop in my city. Mr. Cathy's values are not Chicago's values.” In addition to Cathy's views on marriage, Emanuel also found the restaurant's policy of closing on Sunday's problematic, calling it “an unacceptable 'holier than thou attitude.' People need to eat...
  • Poll May Lead to Campaign Strategy Shift

    07/14/2012 1:34:39 AM PDT · by John Semmens · 18 replies
    Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 13 July 2012 | John Semmens
    A recent National Geographic poll showing that Americans think President Obama would do better against an invasion from outer space than rival Mitt Romney has Obama campaign strategists thinking. “When you think about it, isn't protecting the planet from being conquered by space monsters the most important thing that any person could do?” mused Obama campaign adviser David Axelrod. “And can there be any doubt that the President would easily outshine anyone else on such a task? After all, remember, he's the one who killed bin-Laden. On the other hand, there's no evidence that Romney has ever killed anyone.” Axelrod...
  • Study Says Reverence for Liberty Sign of Terrorism

    07/08/2012 4:20:01 PM PDT · by John Semmens · 78 replies
    Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 7 July 2012 | John Semmens
    A University of Maryland study funded by the Department of Homeland Security found that “persons reverent about individual liberty are likely to be right-wing terrorists.” “It makes perfect sense when you think about it,” said Secretary Janet Napolitano. “The phrase ‘individual liberty’ doesn’t appear in any of our nation’s founding documents. Its advocates are clearly and suspiciously out of step with America’s basic values.” if you missed any of this week's other semi-news posts you can find them at... http://constitutionclub.org/2012/07/07/semi-news-a-satire-of-recent-news-26/
  • Requiring Congress to Read Bills Before Passing Them Proposed

    07/07/2012 11:58:09 AM PDT · by John Semmens · 13 replies
    Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 6 July 2012 | John Semmens
    Senator Rand Paul (R-Ken) has proposed that members of Congress be given a reasonable amount of time to read bills before they are asked to vote on passing them. This proposal was denounced by Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid (D-Nev) as “an unnecessary impediment to action.” “I find it appalling that Republicans in this body are repeatedly trying to throw up roadblocks to progress,” Reid complained. “The notion that senators must read bills before they vote to make them into laws is fallacious. We have a staff that reads these bills for us. There is no need for us to...
  • Administration Shrugs Off Negative Jobs Report

    07/06/2012 10:45:16 PM PDT · by John Semmens · 29 replies
    Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 6 July 2012 | John Semmens
    The Bureau of Labor Statistics reported that the official unemployment rate remained above 8% for the 41st straight month. The picture for Black unemployment was even more discouraging bumping up in June to over 14% for all ages and to over 39% for those aged 16-19. The White House cautioned that voters should not place too much reliance on any one monthly report, but should look at the longer term trend. “A narrow focus on jobs misses the bigger picture,” Chairman of the Council of Economic Advisers Alan Krueger said in a written statement. “Over the last three years more...
  • Feds Cancel Cooperation with States on Immigration Enforcement

    07/01/2012 2:17:08 PM PDT · by John Semmens · 13 replies
    Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 30 June 2012 | John Semmens
    The Department of Homeland Security has unilaterally revoked an agreement with Arizona and refused to initiate one with Virginia to cooperate in enforcing the country’s immigration laws. “We were never very enthusiastic about these agreements,” Secretary Janet Napolitano admitted. “Communicating the Administration’s nuanced policy to the local governments has always been a problem. At the same time, we felt it was important to convey an impression that we could work together. After all, the President was telling everyone that he had no choice under existing law.” “Now the situation has completely changed,” Napolitano boasted. “The President’s Executive Order has wiped...
  • Press Secretary Says Contention that Obamacare Is Tax “Idiotic”

    06/30/2012 12:11:29 AM PDT · by John Semmens · 56 replies
    Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 29 June 2012 | John Semmens
    Press Secretary Jay Carney sought to get out ahead of the GOP's campaign rhetoric alleging that Obamacare is a huge tax imposed on the middle class. “There's no way this is a tax,” Carney insisted. “The President doesn't call it a tax. The legislation doesn't say it's a tax. Calling it a tax is idiotic. The President has made it quite clear that the $2,000 a person has to pay for refusing to buy health insurance is a punishment for disobedience, not a tax.” The fact that the Supreme Court decision upholding Obamacare was founded on Chief Justice John Roberts'...
  • Woman’s Garden Destroyed by City

    06/26/2012 11:07:06 AM PDT · by John Semmens · 26 replies
    Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 23 June 2012 | John Semmens
    Tulsa, Oklahoma City officials destroyed resident Denise Morrison’s “survival garden” because “this abnormal use of her property was causing anxiety in the neighborhood.” Morrison started the garden after she lost her job. The garden consisted of food and medicinal plants. Before embarking on her agricultural venture, Morrison researched City ordinances to ensure she complied. “Lack of compliance was not the issue,” said City Zoning Director, Leroy Fiat. “The fact that there are no official rules against what she did doesn’t matter. No one else in the city does this.” As for her nutritional and medical needs, Fiat advised that “there...
  • Chicago Mayor Undeterred by Court Ruling on Guns

    06/25/2012 12:04:13 PM PDT · by John Semmens · 11 replies
    Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 23 June 2012 | John Semmens
    Chicago Mayor Rahm Emanuel says a federal court’s overturning of a city firearms ordinance “won’t stop us from carrying out our over all crime strategy.” “The problem from our perspective is that too many people have access to guns,” Emanuel asserted. “We won’t have law and order until everyone except the police is disarmed. The City must have a monopoly on the use of deadly force. Only then will the balance of terror be sufficiently one-sided to ensure peace.” As for the court’s ruling, Emanuel suggested that “the court may take whatever position it likes in the courtroom. But we...
  • Pelosi Urges President to Raise Debt Ceiling

    06/25/2012 8:53:24 AM PDT · by John Semmens · 10 replies
    Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 23 June 2012 | John Semmens
    House Minority Leader Nancy Pelosi (D-Calif) urged President Obama to follow up his unilateral grant of amnesty to illegal aliens with a unilateral increase in the nation’s debt ceiling. “Failing to enact immigration reform isn’t the only thing Congress has failed at,” Pelosi observed. “The Senate has failed to pass a budget since 2009. And while Congress was barely able to scrape together the votes to increase the debt ceiling last year I wouldn’t want to bet we can do it again.” “Enacting legislation when Congress fails to do so is a power reserved to the President under the ‘necessary...
  • Obama Biographer Says Book Is Being Misused by the Right

    06/23/2012 2:30:16 PM PDT · by John Semmens · 21 replies
    Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 23 June 2012 | John Semmens
    Barack Obama biographer David Maraniss says right-wing political opportunists are misusing his book. The book in question is Barack Obama: The Story. In this book, Maraniss cited dozens of instances in which Obama’s autobiography—Dreams from My Father—presented a false picture of the President’s early life. “First of all, the idea that these people would bother to read my book is a bit of a stunner for me,” Maraniss admitted. “I mean, I’m for Obama all the way. I can’t fathom why anybody on the right would read me.” “Second, they’re being completely unfair to the President,” Maraniss complained. “He wrote...
  • Congressional Candidate Praises Abortion

    06/17/2012 2:52:38 PM PDT · by John Semmens · 8 replies
    Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 16 June 2012 | John Semmens
    Darcy Burner, a Democratic candidate for the House of Representatives in the state of Washington, told an audience at the Netroots Nation convention in Providence Rhode Island that women who have had abortions deserve our thanks. “We all know that humans are destroying this planet,” Burner contended. “We need to single out those who are taking action to stave off this destruction. No action is more heroic than that of a woman who sacrifices her own child to help us move closer to the day when humans become extinct.” In order to help the heroes in the audience gain the...
  • Attorney General Explains “Fast & Furious” Memos

    06/10/2012 11:18:18 AM PDT · by John Semmens · 12 replies
    Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 8 June 2012 | John Semmens
    Attorney General Eric Holder rejected contentions that internal Department of Justice memos in which the phrase “Fast and Furious” appears mean that the Mexican gun-running scandal was known to Department of Justice (DOJ) higher-ups at an early date. The phrase, Holder insisted referred to the movie series. “Everyone at the DOJ is a big fan of the ‘Fast and Furious’ movies,” Holder said in a House Judiciary Committee hearing this past week. “The fast cars, the sexy babes, the wonton violence—are hypnotic in their effects on me and my staff. Vin Diesel’s screen presence is just awesome. So, it’s only...
  • First Lady Denies Photo ID Hypocrisy

    06/10/2012 2:54:11 PM PDT · by John Semmens · 12 replies
    Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 8 June 2012 | John Semmens
    The Obama Administration may be going all-out to prevent states from requiring photo IDs from those voting, but Michelle Obama is fine with imposing a photo ID requirement on those attending her book signings. Those wishing to attend book-signing events featuring the First Lady must buy her book—American Grown: The Story of the White House Kitchen Garden and Gardens Across America—and present a valid photo ID. “There’s no hypocrisy,” Press Secretary Jay Carney maintained. “Comparing voting and visiting with the First Lady is like comparing apples and oranges. Voting is a right that may not be infringed. Meeting the First...
  • President’s “My Sons” Reference Explained

    05/28/2012 10:10:32 AM PDT · by John Semmens · 11 replies
    Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 26 May 2012 | John Semmens
    President Obama’s campaign speech defending his healthcare policy on the grounds that “my daughters should have the same economic opportunities as my sons” has puzzled observers. Only two daughters (Malia and Sasha) have been explicitly acknowledged by the President. Press Secretary Jay Carney explained that while “it is obvious that the President and First Lady have only the two daughters currently living with them in the White House, critics shouldn’t be jumping to the conclusion that he misspoke. Statistics show that the average urban Black male fathers 3.2 children out-of-wedlock. Earlier in his life, the President was a member of...
  • President Blames Deficit on “Greedy Taxpayers”

    05/27/2012 12:41:57 PM PDT · by John Semmens · 17 replies
    Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 26 May 2012 | John Semmens
    Despite running up federal deficits at a faster pace than any previous president, Obama says he is not at fault. “Deficits aren’t the result of spending alone,” the President pointed out. “Deficits occur when there is a gap between spending and revenue. If you look at the trends for both you will see that it is the revenue line that has flattened while the spending line has remained pretty much on track with prior periods.” Of course revenues aren’t keeping up because taxpayer earnings aren’t keeping up. Business profits are down. Employees have been thrown out of work. The base...
  • Racism Said to Be Reason for Anti-Obama Vote in Dem Primaries

    05/25/2012 10:04:13 PM PDT · by John Semmens · 40 replies
    Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 25 May 2012 | John Semmens
    The Democratic presidential primaries in West Virginia, Arkansas, and Kentucky were all won by President Obama. Still, approximately 40% of the votes went for, respectively, an incarcerated felon, a virtual unknown, and “uncommitted.” Similar less than dominant outcomes in a few of the 1968 primaries inspired incumbent President Lyndon Johnson to withdraw from the race. No Obama withdrawal is anticipated. Campaign adviser David Axelrod attributed the showing to “residual racism. To those who are stunned by this—after all these were Democratic primaries—I suggest they take a look at history. The three states we are talking about are all in the...
  • Police Report Blames Zimmerman

    05/20/2012 2:11:33 PM PDT · by John Semmens · 22 replies
    Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 19 May 2012 | John Semmens
    A new report from the Sanford, Florida Police Department holds George Zimmerman totally responsible for the incident that resulted in the shooting death of Trayvon Martin last February. Evidence that Martin had severely beaten Zimmerman before he was shot was discounted by the report. “The fact is, if Zimmerman had stayed home that day the confrontation would never have occurred,” the report said. “The black eyes, broken nose, and lacerated scalp he suffered would not have happened if he hadn’t ventured out into the streets and exposed himself to risk.” That Zimmerman had taken on this risk willingly by volunteering...
  • Democrats Make Gay Marriage a Major Political Issue

    05/12/2012 11:11:18 AM PDT · by John Semmens · 22 replies
    President Obama announced that his thinking has evolved to the point where he now supports the idea that persons of the same sex are entitled to marry one another. “Look, Jesus spent his career in the company of men,” Obama pointed out. “He never married. I think we have a pretty good indication that it was only the prejudice of the religious and secular authorities that prevented him hooking up with one of the Apostles—perhaps the mysterious ‘beloved apostle.’ I say it’s time that prejudice and repression of gays come to an end.” House Minority Leader Nancy Pelosi (D-Calif) said...
  • Kagan Confident Violation Won’t Get Her in Trouble

    03/30/2012 9:44:43 PM PDT · by John Semmens · 76 replies
    Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 30 March 2012 | John Semmens
    Supreme Court Justice Elena Kagan brushed off accusations that her participation in the Court’s hearing on Obamacare violates the law. Section 455(b)(3) of Title 28 of the U.S. Code requires judges to disqualify themselves from hearing cases when they have “served in governmental employment and in such capacity participated as counsel, adviser, or material witness concerning the proceeding or expressed an opinion concerning the merits of the particular case or controversy.” As Solicitor General, Kagan served in such a role. “The most important job for a judge is to mete out justice,” Kagan asserted. “Mere parchment—whether it be a Constitution...
  • Pelosi Predicts Court Will Find Obamacare Constitutional

    03/24/2012 2:25:23 PM PDT · by John Semmens · 26 replies · 1+ views
    Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 24 March 2012 | John Semmens
    House Minority Leader Nancy Pelosi (D-Calif) confidently predicted that the US Supreme Court will rule that the President’s health care law is Constitutional. “The proof is right there in the Constitution itself where it promises that the government will provide for the people’s rights to life, liberty, and pursuit of happiness,” Pelosi said. “By making sure everyone buys health insurance the law is protecting their lives. By requiring that employers cover birth control costs the law is liberating people from the risks of unwanted pregnancies. And as for pursuit of happiness—isn’t that what those who need birth control are doing?”...
  • Executive Order Authorizing Martial Law Called “Routine”

    03/25/2012 2:50:07 PM PDT · by John Semmens · 15 replies · 3+ views
    Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 24 March 2012 | John Semmens
    Last weekend’s issuance of an Executive Order giving the President the option of declaring an emergency and taking control over all food, energy, water, transportation and any other materials was described as “routine” by Presidential Press Secretary Jay Carney. “The President has obligations to the American people,” Carney observed. “He would like the cooperation of Congress in his efforts to fulfill these obligations. But as we have seen, there are many in Congress who have labored to obstruct these efforts. The President needs to have latitude to act.” “It would be best for members of Congress to consider this Executive...