Why I hate the lefties at PETA: They piss people off by declaring that animals have the same or more rights than humans. The only rights animals have are whatever we humans afford them, out of compassion for a living entity.
I think your posting is meant to be humorous, but it is pretty sad if all those agencies treated you as you said. Anybody along the line could have told you to borrow a coyote, wolf, or large dog from somebody; the cats would all clear out to the next county, without having to be mutilated by humans.
Okay, I'm a cat person, not exactly in disguise! I hope you find a humane way of ridding your life of these pests. jjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjj <- boy cat on keyboard....