Skip to comments.Senators Demand to Know Where Companies Keep Their Cash [semi-satire]
Posted on 06/27/2016 8:49:22 AM PDT by John Semmens
Concerned that some of the nation's resources may be out of their reach, Sens. Al Franken (D-Minn) and Chris Coons (D-Del) are demanding that "all businesses fully disclose where all their money is."
"As President Obama said when he was nominated for his second term, government is the only entity we all belong to," Franken recalled. "It is every business' and every individual's duty to do the utmost to ensure the survival of this single unifying entity. At a minimum, this means making all of their financial resources known to the government so they may be appropriated if the need to do so arises."
Franken professed to understand the need for privacy, but maintained that "it is one thing to insist on privacy from the prying eyes of business rivals. It is quite another to keep secrets from the government. Should we sit by and allow the government to default when we could save it by seizing the money businesses and individuals are hoarding? How could we justify letting the selfish interests of the private sector impede the collective obligation of all of us to support the government?"
In related news, President Obama averred that "entitlements are necessities of a 21st century economy" and that "we need to retool our laws to ensure that this vital cog in the machine is well-oiled. Knowing where all the money can be found is a crucial component of making this happen."
if you missed any of this week's other semi-news/semi-satire posts you can find them at...
Same place crooked politician Demo-rats keep theirs.
Is this satire or future news from the Hillary Administration?
Those who refuse to vote for Donald Trump are voting FOR Hillary, a likely Chuck Schumer as Senate Majority Leader AND 2-3 Supreme Court seats. A very attractive picture - NOT!
I’m not seeing the satire here. It’s just too close to reality. This is especially true when I can hear the Franken-monster’s voice in my head with exactly those words.
As always, brilliant! (-:
Most companies that I’ve dealt with have special rooms with king-sized mattresses. The bigger companies have many rooms with mattresses stacked to the ceiling.
I couldn’t find the satire either.
Remember registration leads to confiscation.
Yep, cash in a feezer at my house. Just got to have my lemo driver to take me there to pick it before a hurricane hits. Seriously, if you or I took $10,001.00 of our own money out of the bank the IRS and DEA would be fighting over who gets to seize my money but that liberal joker got a pass?
Diversion another senators game when the public gets to close to the truth.
Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.