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Senators Demand to Know Where Companies Keep Their Cash [semi-satire]
Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 26 June 2016 | John Semmens

Posted on 06/27/2016 8:49:22 AM PDT by John Semmens

Concerned that some of the nation's resources may be out of their reach, Sens. Al Franken (D-Minn) and Chris Coons (D-Del) are demanding that "all businesses fully disclose where all their money is."

"As President Obama said when he was nominated for his second term, government is the only entity we all belong to," Franken recalled. "It is every business' and every individual's duty to do the utmost to ensure the survival of this single unifying entity. At a minimum, this means making all of their financial resources known to the government so they may be appropriated if the need to do so arises."

Franken professed to understand the need for privacy, but maintained that "it is one thing to insist on privacy from the prying eyes of business rivals. It is quite another to keep secrets from the government. Should we sit by and allow the government to default when we could save it by seizing the money businesses and individuals are hoarding? How could we justify letting the selfish interests of the private sector impede the collective obligation of all of us to support the government?"

In related news, President Obama averred that "entitlements are necessities of a 21st century economy" and that "we need to retool our laws to ensure that this vital cog in the machine is well-oiled. Knowing where all the money can be found is a crucial component of making this happen."

if you missed any of this week's other semi-news/semi-satire posts you can find them at...

http://www.gopbriefingroom.com/index.php/topic,213447.0/topicseen.html


TOPICS: Business/Economy; Government; Politics
KEYWORDS: democrats; entitlements; satire; socialism

1 posted on 06/27/2016 8:49:22 AM PDT by John Semmens
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To: John Semmens

Same place crooked politician Demo-rats keep theirs.


2 posted on 06/27/2016 8:50:25 AM PDT by SkyDancer ("They Say That Nobody's Perfect But Yet Here I Am")
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To: John Semmens

Is this satire or future news from the Hillary Administration?

Those who refuse to vote for Donald Trump are voting FOR Hillary, a likely Chuck Schumer as Senate Majority Leader AND 2-3 Supreme Court seats. A very attractive picture - NOT!


3 posted on 06/27/2016 8:57:17 AM PDT by SES1066 (Quality, Speed or Economical - Any 2 of 3 except in government - 1 at best but never #3!)
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To: John Semmens

I’m not seeing the satire here. It’s just too close to reality. This is especially true when I can hear the Franken-monster’s voice in my head with exactly those words.


4 posted on 06/27/2016 9:16:13 AM PDT by T-Bird45 (It feels like the seventies, and it shouldn't.)
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To: John Semmens

As always, brilliant! (-:


5 posted on 06/27/2016 9:28:40 AM PDT by MeganC (The Republic of The United States of America: 7/4/1776 to 6/26/2015 R.I.P.)
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To: John Semmens

Most companies that I’ve dealt with have special rooms with king-sized mattresses. The bigger companies have many rooms with mattresses stacked to the ceiling.


6 posted on 06/27/2016 9:50:54 AM PDT by fella ("As it was before Noah so shall it be again,")
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To: John Semmens

I couldn’t find the satire either.
Remember registration leads to confiscation.


7 posted on 06/27/2016 10:40:55 AM PDT by nicepaco
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To: SkyDancer

Yep, cash in a feezer at my house. Just got to have my lemo driver to take me there to pick it before a hurricane hits. Seriously, if you or I took $10,001.00 of our own money out of the bank the IRS and DEA would be fighting over who gets to seize my money but that liberal joker got a pass?


8 posted on 06/27/2016 11:11:17 AM PDT by TonyM
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To: John Semmens

Diversion another senators game when the public gets to close to the truth.


9 posted on 06/27/2016 12:02:34 PM PDT by Vaduz (women and children to be impacted the most.)
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