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Gov. Kasich Lurches Left [semi-satire]
Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 25 Nov 2018 | John Semmens

Posted on 11/26/2018 8:46:08 AM PST by John Semmens

Eyeing a potential 2020 run against President Trump, Ohio Gov. John Kasich (R) took a dramatic left turn in his final months in office. Persuaded that his “everyone needs a hug” might be a bit too thin of a platform, Kasich decided to reverse gears on traditional Republican pro-life and pro-self-defense positions and veto the so-called “heartbeat bill” and “stand-your-ground bill.”

“The key factor in my decision was my perception that I must differentiate myself from Trump in any way I can,” Kasich explained. “If Trump is for something it must be wrong for America. So, when Trump came out as anti-abortion, I figure I have to oppose that position. The same goes for personal self-defense. Trump is such a strong advocate for Second Amendment rights that the only logical choice left for those of us who want to remove this monster from the presidency is to oppose the Second Amendment.”

Both bills have passed the Ohio House with veto-proof majorities, but the Governor has threatened “to ruin everyone’s Christmas holiday” by forcing the legislature to return for an override vote during Christmas week. “If these guys believe so strongly in protecting the lives of the unborn or allowing citizens to use deadly force against criminals let them sacrifice their comfort for their beliefs.”

Whether Kasich’s betrayal of Republican voters who elected him to two terms as Ohio’s governor will achieve the results he anticipates remains doubtful. Incoming Republican Gov. Mike Dewine favors both bills. So, a Kasich veto will likely only postpone enactment by a few months. As for boosting Kasich’s chances against Trump, it seems that a “newbie” baby killer and gun-grabber would be less attractive than one of the Democratic 2020 presidential contenders with a longer pedigree on these issues.

In related news, it appears that Kasich’s new position on abortion is in line with the Human Rights Committee of United Nations which just declared that “states must legalize abortion.” The declaration comes as a “reinterpretation” of an older UN provision stating that “Every human being has the inherent right to life. This right shall be protected by law.” The new interpretation includes legalization of assisted suicide and euthanasia. High Commissioner Michelle Bachelet Jeria explained “we needed to update our interpretation to deal with the emerging problems of surplus human population. The previous provision was drafted in the wake of World War II when the widespread destruction of human life was on everyone’s mind.”

if you missed any of this week's other semi-news/semi-satire posts you can find them at...

https://azconservative.org/2018/11/24/clinton-calls-for-tough-talk-on-immigration/


TOPICS: Government; History; Humor; Politics
KEYWORDS: abortion; guns; leftism; satire

1 posted on 11/26/2018 8:46:08 AM PST by John Semmens
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To: John Semmens
Kasich was persuaded that his “everyone needs a hug” might be a bit too thin of a platform....

So Kasich beefed up his platform.....once in office, everyone gets a McDonald's coupon......half off a Big Mac.

2 posted on 11/26/2018 8:50:37 AM PST by Liz (Our side has 8 trillion bullets; the other side doesn't know which bathroom to use.)
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To: Liz

What’s funny is that in the highly unlikely event that Kasich got the GOP nomination, the media would turn him into “Hitler II”, just as they did with Romney.


3 posted on 11/26/2018 8:52:00 AM PST by dfwgator (Endut! Hoch Hech!)
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To: John Semmens
A UN High Commissioner explained “it's time to update you-have-no-right-to-live laws to deal with a surplus human population
----and all those useless eaters." The UN's new wrinkle endorses compulsory assisted suicide and euthanasia .

I hear DNC chair Perez quickly picked up on that----a new Democrat poll suggests
assisted suicide for movie stars and mercy killing of celebrities are surefire vote getters.

4 posted on 11/26/2018 9:00:28 AM PST by Liz (Our side has 8 trillion bullets; the other side doesn't know which bathroom to use.)
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To: John Semmens
Gov. Kasich Lurches Left

Hopefully, this moron will “Lurch” toward the unemployment line after his next election. That’s where he belongs...idiot.

5 posted on 11/26/2018 9:23:31 AM PST by GoldenPup
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To: Liz
“I hear DNC chair Perez quickly picked up on that——a new Democrat poll suggests assisted suicide for movie stars and mercy killing of celebrities are surefire vote getters.”

Maybe it is time to pass legislation that combines term limits with voter-assisted right-to-die.

6 posted on 11/26/2018 9:33:33 AM PST by jeffersondem
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To: jeffersondem
.....it is time to pass legislation that combines term limits with voter-assisted right-to-die.....

I like it.

7 posted on 11/26/2018 9:36:36 AM PST by Liz (Our side has 8 trillion bullets; the other side doesn't know which bathroom to use.)
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To: All

I didn’t know there was left left for him, but there he goes again.


8 posted on 11/26/2018 10:29:01 AM PST by Peter ODonnell (I taught AOC everything she knows, and it only took five minutes)
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