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CNN Cites ‘Oppression’ of Caravan as ‘Impeachable Offense’ [semi-satire]
Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 2 Dec 2018 | John Semmens

Posted on 12/01/2018 11:21:10 AM PST by John Semmens

According to CNN’s Jim Acosta, the revelation that persons in the United States illegally are entitled to more than $40,000 a year in federal benefits “casts a sinister light on the Trump Administration’s extraordinary efforts to block the Central American caravan’s efforts to claim these benefits for its members.”

“Why would there be such a program if these immigrants weren’t entitled to this compensation?” Acosta asked. “Trump’s attempt to characterize those who are merely asserting their legal rights as an ‘invasion’ is a slander designed to conceal his government’s refusal to recognize and enforce these immigrants’ rights to this money.”

“The caravan’s members assault on the ICE personnel at the border needs to be reassessed given these new facts,” Acosta demanded. “Wouldn’t you be angry if you knew that Trump was trying to prevent you from obtaining money that was owed you? Might you not grab a rock to throw? Might you not try to tear down the barrier that blocked your path to cashing in on this benefit? I mean, who is really at fault for the violence that has ensued—the individuals trying to collect what they’re owed or the deadbeat trying to welsh on the debt owed? I think that even if the Mueller investigation clears Trump, his violent response to try to avoid paying this debt to immigrants is grounds for impeachment.”

California Attorney General Xavier Becerra was even harsher in his criticism of the President’s opposition to admitting the caravan. “California is part of the land the United States stole from Mexico in the nineteenth century,” Becerra argued. “All efforts to prevent the restoration of this land to Mexico perpetuates the aggression initiated in the 1800s. The only honorable solution is to work out the terms for undoing that original wrong. Not only should the land be returned, but all of the profits extracted during the 170 years of unjustified occupation need to be paid out to Mexico as reparations.”

Meanwhile, the United Nations has affirmed the right of immigrants to go wherever they want in the world and has ordered the Trump Administration to “cease and desist from any and all actions aimed at impeding, obstructing, or interfering with this basic human right.” UN spokesman Babar Baloch warned that “the full might of all the member nations will be brought to bear on the United States if the Trump Administration fails to comply with our directive.”

In related news, the hysteria exhibited by the media over the use of tear gas to repel the caravan mob that attempted to crash through the border near Tijuana stands in stark contrast to the media’s silence while the Obama Administration used tear gas dozens of times between 2012 and 2016. Acosta explained that “we had complete faith in President Obama. We knew that his motives were pure and he must have had a good reason for whatever he did whenever he did it. We have no such faith in Trump. We know his intent is evil and that whatever he does is wrong whenever he does it.”

if you missed any of this week's other semi-news/semi-satire posts you can find them at...

https://azconservative.org/2018/12/01/cnn-cites-oppression-of-caravan-as-impeachable-offense/


TOPICS: Government; Humor; Politics; Travel
KEYWORDS: illegals; media; satire; trump

1 posted on 12/01/2018 11:21:10 AM PST by John Semmens
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To: John Semmens

Apparently conducting the business that made you wealthy is also an impeachable offense. Who knew?


2 posted on 12/01/2018 11:29:52 AM PST by rktman ( #My2nd! Enlisted in the Navy in '67 to protect folks rights to strip my rights. WTH)
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To: John Semmens

Securing the borders from illegal foreign invaders, regarded by libtard socialists as impeachable offense, 2018.

The enemy within.


3 posted on 12/01/2018 11:30:31 AM PST by Secret Agent Man (Gone Galt; Not Averse to Going Bronson.)
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To: John Semmens

It’s hard to satire CNN as its own broadcasts are a joke in of themselves.


4 posted on 12/01/2018 11:31:09 AM PST by RedMonqey ("Those who turn their arms in for plowshares will be doing the plowing for those who didn't.")
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To: John Semmens

No, it’s not.


5 posted on 12/01/2018 11:31:56 AM PST by Skywise
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To: John Semmens

I assume that this piece of fecal matter is trying to say every thing POTUS does is just peachy...


6 posted on 12/01/2018 11:34:40 AM PST by SuperLuminal (Where is another agitator for republicanism like Sam Adams when we need him?)
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To: John Semmens

There is no starting point to answer this evil fool.


7 posted on 12/01/2018 11:49:55 AM PST by teletech
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To: John Semmens

Nothing seems to come out of CNN except garbage. I cannot understand how a news network can allow its employees to produce such junk.


8 posted on 12/01/2018 1:03:45 PM PST by maxwellsmart_agent (I)
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To: John Semmens

Those people have zero rights to either enter our nation or receive any kind of funding from us.

They are not citizens and are not on our soil.

Our government has responsibility to keep them south of our border unless they make the choice to enter under our rules and our laws.


9 posted on 12/01/2018 2:59:06 PM PST by oldenuff35
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To: John Semmens

“Trump is trying to keep invaders from obtaining money THAT IS OWED TO THEM” ??????

Acosta needs to sober up & get off all the drugs.

The USA OWES NOTHING to anyone outside of the borders.

The fact that there even IS such a program is despicable.

The numbers mentions are 4 times what I live on with Soc Sec, after working since I was 16 y/o.


10 posted on 12/01/2018 4:06:30 PM PST by ridesthemiles
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