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Bill Maher - Boy Genius
via (smug) e-mail | 9-19-05 | My Lunatic Mother

Posted on 09/19/2005 8:26:55 PM PDT by TMD

Bill Maher's closing bit the other night:

"Mr. President, this job can't be fun for you any more. There's no more money to spend--you used up all of that. You can't start another war because you used up the army. And now, darn the luck, the rest of your term has become the Bush family nightmare: helping poor people. Listen to your Mom. The cupboard's bare, the credit cards maxed out. No one's speaking to you. Mission accomplished.

"Now it's time to do what you've always done best: lose interest and walk away. Like you did with your military service and the oil company and the baseball team. It's time. Time to move on and try the next fantasy job. How about cowboy or space man? Now I know what you're saying: there's so many other things that you as President could involve yourself in. Please don't. I know, I know. There's a lot left to do. There's a war with Venezuela. Eliminating the sales tax on yachts. Turning the space program over to the church. And Social Security to Fannie Mae. Giving embryos the vote.

"But, Sir, none of that is going to happen now. Why? Because you govern like Billy Joel drives. You've performed so poorly I'm surprised that you haven't given yourself a medal. You're a catastrophe that walks like a man. Herbert Hoover was a shitty president, but even he never conceded an entire city to rising water and snakes.

"On your watch, we've lost almost all of our allies, the surplus, four airliners, two trade centers, a piece of the Pentagon and the City of New Orleans. Maybe you're just not lucky. I'm not saying you don't love this country. I'm just wondering how much worse it could be if you were on the other side.

"So, yes, God does speak to you. What he is saying is: 'Take a hint.' "


TOPICS: TV/Movies
KEYWORDS: angrycrat; hatefullib
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Just received this from my apoplectic, Bush-hating, limousine-liberal, NRDC supporting mother. She gets all her "facts" from the Daily Show, Time magazine, CNN and her country club buddies. Sigh, so many idiots, so little time.......Any comments?
1 posted on 09/19/2005 8:26:56 PM PDT by TMD
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To: TMD

Bill Maher is the idiot who said the 9/11 hijackers were brave and we were cowards. Bill, you are not only a coward, you are a smug little asshat.


2 posted on 09/19/2005 8:28:54 PM PDT by popdonnelly
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To: TMD

In order to be funny, there has to be some truth in what you say. Maher is not funny.


3 posted on 09/19/2005 8:29:16 PM PDT by SubMareener (Become a monthly donor! Free FreeRepublic.com from Quarterly FReepathons!)
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To: TMD

Well, just this little gem - - - "You can pick your nose, but you can't pick your family".


4 posted on 09/19/2005 8:30:03 PM PDT by Theresawithanh (As long as Dean's the head of the D-N-C, it just looks better for the G-O-P!!)
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To: TMD

Condolences. Remember, nobody gets to pick their parents.


5 posted on 09/19/2005 8:30:09 PM PDT by popdonnelly
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To: TMD

Bill maher, eh?
last time I remember seeing the a$$'s face was shortly after nov.2 last year when I happened to stumble upon his show on HBO. I remember bursting out laughing and finger-pointing at the tv screen..."LOSER!LOSER!"

Bwahahahahaha


6 posted on 09/19/2005 8:30:45 PM PDT by voletti (The meaning of life, the universe and everything...)
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To: TMD
****her country club buddies.***

hmmm...I thought only evil rich greedy republicans hung out at country clubs.

7 posted on 09/19/2005 8:30:59 PM PDT by buckeyesrule (Go Bucks! Beat Iowa!)
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To: TMD
Mahr is a hateful little puppy.
8 posted on 09/19/2005 8:31:24 PM PDT by Mike Darancette (Mesocons for Rice '08)
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To: TMD

Have your navel surgically removed, so there's no longer any evidence of a connection between you and the lady who thinks Bill Maher is either [a] funny, [b] intelligent, or both. God put Maher on Earth as a warning against genetic engineering.


9 posted on 09/19/2005 8:31:24 PM PDT by PzLdr ("The Emperor is not as forgiving as I am" - Darth Vader)
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To: SubMareener

Bill Maher, the Eddy Haskell for our times.


10 posted on 09/19/2005 8:31:27 PM PDT by claudiustg (Vote for one Democrat, vote for them all...)
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To: popdonnelly

i hate that that piece of ####!!!


11 posted on 09/19/2005 8:31:37 PM PDT by fatteddy
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To: TMD
Sure...I'll comment. :-) You ought to be proud of yourself. Even if a little bit of what's on your "about page" is true.

I've got relatives like yours too...even your mother. Soon, you'll get a really good article that you can fire back her way....and take heart. They really are a whole lot more bothered than we are ....ALWAYS.
12 posted on 09/19/2005 8:31:57 PM PDT by hiredhand (My kitty disappeared. NOT the rifle!)
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To: TMD

He has lousier ratings than Morton Downey Jr. and will wind up the same way he did.


13 posted on 09/19/2005 8:32:06 PM PDT by Rome2000 (Peace is not an option)
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To: TMD

Are you still in the will? If so, might I suggest a "contract"?


14 posted on 09/19/2005 8:32:26 PM PDT by clee1 (We use 43 muscles to frown, 17 to smile, and 2 to pull a trigger. I'm lazy and I'm tired of smiling.)
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To: TMD

Yeah Bill Maher I geuss losing elections really does suck doesn't it. LOL!


15 posted on 09/19/2005 8:32:35 PM PDT by buckeyesrule (Go Bucks! Beat Iowa!)
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To: TMD

Bill Maher is a real scumbag. Saw his show with that idiot commie professor who supported the 9/11 attacks, The "professor" was totally inarticulate, so Maher helped him out with a speech that even some of you who hate the word "treason" might consider treasonous. Basically Maher "explained" how we have been going around murdering people all over the World, one of his big examples being WWII, and so we were fairly getting a taste of our own medicine. Maher is a left wing jerk of the highest order.


16 posted on 09/19/2005 8:33:02 PM PDT by Williams
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To: Theresawithanh

OMG, ain't that the truth!! Maybe that will be my response, though it might spoil Thanksgiving.....


17 posted on 09/19/2005 8:33:06 PM PDT by TMD (Get Planned Parenthood out of our schools!)
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To: TMD

Like others here often say, history for a liberal begins when he wakes up in the morning, and Pinhead Maher is no exception. Unfortunately for Blathering Bill, many Americans remember what wasn't done or addressed for eight long years during the Klintoon reign of error as Osama attacked us repeatedly. GWB inherited quite a mess.

But don't forget, recent history only began on January 20, 2001, and GWB is responsible for everything bad, and gets no credit for anything good. Libbies say so, and that's that!


18 posted on 09/19/2005 8:33:10 PM PDT by Cecily
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To: TMD

I'd be eliminating my mother from my email list, seriously.
Bill Maher and his type will have to make an account one day for their perception of God and his holiness, and there won't be a second chance.


19 posted on 09/19/2005 8:33:34 PM PDT by WoodstockCat (General Honore: "The storm gets a vote... We're not stuck on stupid.")
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To: TMD

what an idiot


20 posted on 09/19/2005 8:33:59 PM PDT by HawaiianGecko
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