Skip to comments.Predicting PA by analyzing "THE OFFICE" - vanity
Posted on 10/20/2008 10:24:44 PM PDT by Marie2
I have been thinking about how PA will play out in the general election, and have decided to do an HONEST analysis by predicting how the characters on "The Office" will vote (or not vote). "The Office" is located in Scranton, PA. Criticism, agreements, alternate scenarios and comments most welcome.
MICHAEL: Michael will vote for Obama. He likes to be part of whatever he sees as the trend, and he sees Obama as the Next Big Thing. Michael: Obama
JIM: Jim has never voted and will not vote. He has, however, registered repeatedly. He likes to register with a famous name, like Pol Pot, and act offended if challenged. Alternatively, he has registered as Dwight Schrute a couple of times and actually messed up Dwight's ability to vote last time around. Jim: no vote
DWIGHT: Will vote for Bob Barr (unless his registration is mysteriously messed up again). He attends Libertarian conventions from time to time. Dwight: Bob Barr
PAM: Is a sweet girl who thinks it's a black man's turn. Also she finds McCain a little harsh. Sorry, I love her, but Pam's voting Obama.
ROY: Is a McCain man. He's all for the union, and would have voted for Hilary, but can't bring himself to vote for Obama. Roy: McCain
ANGELA: Is voting for McCain and doesn't care to discuss it. Angela: McCain
ANDY: Is voting for McCain, partly because he's always voted Republican and partly because he's a Cornell grad and doesn't like the Harvard guys rubbing his nose in their Harvardness all the time. ANDY: McCain
STANLEY: Is quietly voting McCain because he likes his health plan and enjoys holding on to as much of his own money as possible. He'd like to see a black man as president but thinks Obama will embarrass the race. Stanley: McCain
KELLY: Loves Obama and can't wait to vote her him! She is all about hope and change. Hope and change, everybody! But her parents, new citizens from India, have a deep distrust of Obama. So their two votes will cancel hers out. Kelly and fam: 1 Obama, 2 McCain
CREED: Can't vote because he can't let the government know where he is. Creed: no vote.
MOSE: lives in an alternate universe and can't come down to earth long enough to vote. Mose: no vote.
PHYLLIS: Like Pam, has a heart of gold and wants a black man to have a chance. However, her fiance Van, who owns a refrigeration company, wants McCain (he makes over $250,000 per year). This upsets Phyllis and, although it doesn't make her vote for Obama, she sits this one out in order to keep the peace. Phyllis/Van: one vote McCain.
JAN: A good feminist, will vote Obama.
That's McCain 7, Obama 4, Barr 1
That's McCain 58%, Obama 33%, Barr 8%.
Did I miss anybody?
I see Jim possibly trying to vote for Eisenhower thinking that he is still alive.
Brain fart. I meant to say that I see Michael mistakenly voting for Ike.
Jim is the only half-normal one on the show. He’s voting McCain, but telling Dwight he’s with Barr.
Then there's Kevin, who's an idiot, so he's also for Obama.
Fun idea, but of course in reality, every single member of the cast will vote for Obama.
I could see that.
Your tag line is a riot.
...and appropriate for this thread, huh? I hadn’t thought of that.
I agree, Oscar will vote Obama.
Kevin will intend to vote for Obama, stop by the poll after work, see a long line, and go home.
So add one vote for Obama in my estimation.
Well there’s Toby, but he’s stuck in a hospital in Costa Rica, so unless he sent for an absentee, he doesn’t count.
Also the new HR woman, Holly, who actually likes Michael and thinks Kevin is retarded...I think she’d be an Obama vote too.
OK, Toby is a McCain absentee.
Holly is too whack to vote.
But I have to count Oscar’s “Carlos” as an Obama, since I am counting Van and Kelly’s parents.
So I’m adding 2 Obama (Oscar and Carlos) and 1 McCain (Toby). I have Holly as too whack, and Kevin as too lazy. Marilyn, the heavy drinker, has checked out. I don’t think she’s voting.
That’s McCain 8, Obama 6, Barr 1
McCain 53%, Obama 40%, Barr 6%
I’m telling you I think I’m on to something.
There is a possibility that Michael might, just might, vote for McCain because Sarah is hot.
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