Skip to comments.Western parents need to chill out about their kids
Posted on 07/23/2015 4:46:53 PM PDT by Pining_4_TX
The author of Paranoid Parenting says that far from needing a stricter Asian approach, Western parenting is already way too intensive.
Last night, in a debate in London titled Western parents dont know how to bring up their children, regular spiked contributor Frank Furedi clashed with Amy Chua, author of Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother , and others. Furedis opening remarks are published below.
When it comes to discussing parenting, everyone thinks they are warranted to take their own personal story and recast it as a philosophy. On no other issue are you allowed to communicate such prejudices and such stereotypes as you are in relation to parenting.
(Excerpt) Read more at spiked-online.com ...
We're going to have a whole generation or two, of kids who have no memory of their mother , except that she was texting all the time. Sad. It's going to be a problem.
I like the Asian way better.
Letting the kids get into drugs and perversion is the way to disaster
The point of the article is that many Western parents are behaving more like the hovering Asian parents we think are better.
Kids need free time, time to create, to think, to play, and even to just goof off. Kids learn more at home tinkering around with their toys and playing in their yards than they do at a preschool where they are forced to sit for a couple hours while someone drills the ABCs and numbers into their heads.
Kick kids off electronics and let the run around outside. Problem solved.
I think that would solve a lot of other problems at the same time.
I looked at my husband and asked, "how did we survive?"
I don’t think ‘Asian’ means the same thing in the UK as the US.
This isn’t limited to parenting. I work for a large company as an engineer. I have an endless supply of managers running around trying to ram help down my throat. In absolutely 0 percent of cases has the help been needed or helpful.
I think a lot of modern parents are both too lax and too “intensive” at the same time.
They are intensive about managing their children’s activities, constantly supervising them, boosting their self esteem, etc.
However, they are lax when it comes to instilling moral values, critical thinking skills, and a sensible worldview in their children.
Unfortunately, being attentive to the first category does nothing to offset the effects of being inattentive to the second category.
To paraphrase them: “Trust us, your kids will have a LOT OF FUN with us”.
I’ll ask this again...and again. Is there ANY REASON that a kid under 18 needs a “Smart Phone” when there are plenty of (cheap) flip phones out there?
There is no one right way. I think parents need the freedom to choose their own style that meets the needs of the child with his own unique personality and that of the parents. What works for one may not work the another. AND there is that little issue of human innate depravity and personal choice. Try as you might, your kid can still make bad choices. Add to that the imperfections of the parents and sometimes parenting seems like nothing more than a lottery.
Absolutes of parenting:
Do love (in the purest sense, not in the spoiled sense)
That will get a visit from child protective services in lots of places.
Parents need to be in control of their children now more than ever. No matter what experts say or don’t say. The world is going nuts and unguarded children will soon be fodder.
Good list. Good philosophy.
Well, think about this:
Mom is a Chinese upper-middle class high-level professional in New York City.
Dad is a Jewish upper-middle class high-level professional in New York City.
Highly educated Chinese Mom and highly educated Jewish Dad. Just like Tiger Mom Amy Chua and her spouse.
Daughter is an Ivy League grad. “Ivy League grad”, is, I submit, the be-all and end-all goal of “Asian Style” parenting.
According to a Complaint on file in a Federal District Court, this is what the Ivy League daughter talked about/texted about with her Ivy League friends while in college:
“I’ve officially had sex with all of John Doe best friends. . . - did lotsa drugs jk just got very drunk - well anyways - now i have an std i actually hate John Doe like if a girl is about to puke - dont put your unprotected d**k into her. . . I realy dont want to be known as the girl who contracted an std because she
was drunk you know? it is more his fault for f***ing me unconscious - i mean i was conscious
but clearly not in my right mind. . . i was literally blackout. . . like i puked all over the place.
A daughter to make her parents proud.
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