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The Headlines They Wish They Could Write: Day 1
Original content | 7/27/2018 | By Laz A. Mataz

Posted on 07/27/2018 2:35:47 PM PDT by Lazamataz

Today, we discovered that the GDP, a measure of productivity and economic growth, accelerated to 4.1% this last quarter. It had to gall the News Misleadia, they must have been furious. I expected these headlines:

CBS: “Obama Lays Groundwork For Massive GDP Growth In 2018”

NYT: “Trump Fails To Reach 4.2% GDP, Economists Startled”

NBC: “Uncontrolled Expansion Threatens Trade Relations”

CNN: “Trump Russian Collusion Causes Freak Economic Spurt”

MSNBC: “Trump Sucks. Everyone Should Hate Him. Effing Nazi.”
I had fun creating these. I might make this a daily thing.


TOPICS: Chit/Chat; Humor; Weird Stuff
KEYWORDS: lazpings
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1 posted on 07/27/2018 2:35:47 PM PDT by Lazamataz
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To: Lazamataz

You have a promising future as a meta-journalist. You must pursue your calling.


2 posted on 07/27/2018 2:38:36 PM PDT by heterosupremacist (Resistance to tyrants is obedience to God. - (Thomas Jefferson)
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To: Lazamataz

Could we please have the DNC talking points. The DNC has a good juicy negative spin for everyone to enjoy.


3 posted on 07/27/2018 2:39:42 PM PDT by FreedBird (W)
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To: Lazamataz

ABC: “Russians hack Economic spreadsheets — change figures to make Trump look good.”


4 posted on 07/27/2018 2:40:20 PM PDT by freedumb2003 ("Trump is such a liar. He said we'd be tired from all this winning" (/dfwgator 7/27/18))
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To: heterosupremacist
You have a promising future as a meta-journalist.

If meta-data is data about data, then a meta-journalist journals about journalists.

I *LIKE* IT!

5 posted on 07/27/2018 2:41:30 PM PDT by Lazamataz (The New York Times is so openly dishonest, even their crossword puzzles lie.)
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To: FreedBird

>>Could we please have the DNC talking points.<<

“Stormy daniels lets caged children out of Trump concentration camps. Oh and slight uptick in some arcane economic numbers no one cares about.”


6 posted on 07/27/2018 2:41:58 PM PDT by freedumb2003 ("Trump is such a liar. He said we'd be tired from all this winning" (/dfwgator 7/27/18))
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To: Lazamataz

The media wants people to send hate Trump talking points in for them to read. They cannot report the news anymore, only something to keep the vicious hate train going.


7 posted on 07/27/2018 2:42:04 PM PDT by FreedBird (W)
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To: FreedBird
Could we please have the DNC talking points. The DNC has a good juicy negative spin for everyone to enjoy.

Being as the Democrat Party is a wholly-owned subsidiary of the News Misleadia, I already have.

8 posted on 07/27/2018 2:42:27 PM PDT by Lazamataz (The New York Times is so openly dishonest, even their crossword puzzles lie.)
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To: Lazamataz

9 posted on 07/27/2018 2:42:34 PM PDT by Slyfox (Not my circus, not my monkeys)
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To: TheOldLady; Cyber Liberty; CatherineofAragon; melissa_in_ga; Slings and Arrows; ...

Dear LazList members,

Would you like me to ping you to these, or should I create a new ping list so people can more easily opt-in/out and not miss the more meaty articles I occasionally write?


10 posted on 07/27/2018 2:43:59 PM PDT by Lazamataz (The New York Times is so openly dishonest, even their crossword puzzles lie.)
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To: Lazamataz
If he could walk on water, the headline would read:
"Trump can't swim!!!"
11 posted on 07/27/2018 2:44:48 PM PDT by dainbramaged (If you want a friend, get a dog. Preferably a rescue pit bull.)
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To: Lazamataz

Ping on..........


12 posted on 07/27/2018 2:45:48 PM PDT by Red Badger (July 2018 - the month the world discovered the TRUTH......Q Anon)
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To: dainbramaged

If Trump singlehandedly cured cancer, the NYT would headline: “Trump Crushes Oncology Industry, Thousands Jobless.”


13 posted on 07/27/2018 2:45:58 PM PDT by Lazamataz (The New York Times is so openly dishonest, even their crossword puzzles lie.)
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To: Lazamataz

Keep me on your ping list, please!


14 posted on 07/27/2018 2:46:06 PM PDT by generally ( Don't be stupid. We have politicians for that.)
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To: Lazamataz

lol


15 posted on 07/27/2018 2:47:32 PM PDT by blondiegoodbadugly
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To: Lazamataz

Ping away. I always enjoy your posts.


16 posted on 07/27/2018 2:47:50 PM PDT by TADSLOS (Whose Gonna Fill Their Shoes...?)
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To: Lazamataz

I heard one report today that said the rise in GDP was fueled by countries stocking up ahead of tariffs.


17 posted on 07/27/2018 2:47:55 PM PDT by logitech
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To: Lazamataz

Ping!


18 posted on 07/27/2018 2:48:18 PM PDT by doorgunner69 (Give me the liberty to take care of my own security..........)
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To: Lazamataz

I like your list just as it is.

Too man y lists get me cornfuzled.


19 posted on 07/27/2018 2:49:10 PM PDT by freedumb2003 ("Trump is such a liar. He said we'd be tired from all this winning" (/dfwgator 7/27/18))
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To: Lazamataz

Washington Post “Electoral Collage just joking, Hillary President”


20 posted on 07/27/2018 2:51:26 PM PDT by Lee Enfield (We aren't tired of winning, they aren't tired of whining. I'm comfortable with that.)
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