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Dear Abby: Veteran rubbed the wrong way by the expression: ‘Thank you for your service’
al.com ^ | Sept. 22, 2019 | Abigail Van Buren

Posted on 09/22/2019 8:07:08 AM PDT by bgill

DEAR ABBY: I am a veteran, and something gnaws at me every time I hear it. It’s the expression, “Thank you for your service.” Having lived through the ’60s and ’70s, I remember all too well seeing many soldiers bad-mouthed and worse during those times. Since 9/11 many of the same people who were critical of us then are now thanking us. It rings hollow to many of the vets I have talked to. We did our job, some to the ultimate level. We never asked for thanks, and we still don’t. We respect the rights given to those who wish to abuse them because we believe in them. Some of us even died so all could enjoy these rights. If a person truly wants to thank a vet, DO something for him or her instead of just offering lip service. Cut their grass, offer to help carry in their groceries, etc. While words are appreciated at times, hearing them too often becomes hollow. Showing appreciation is always welcome. -- A VETERAN IN THE MIDWEST

(Excerpt) Read more at al.com ...


TOPICS: Chit/Chat; Military/Veterans
KEYWORDS: abbyisafake; dearabby; military
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To: Savage Beast

I was an Army doc, too. I just say, “Thanks for paying for it.”


41 posted on 09/22/2019 8:46:12 AM PDT by wastoute (Government cannot redistribute wealth. Government can only redistribute poverty.)
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To: bgill

I’m a vet. I just tell them thank you and we need to honor all those who have served.

It is a good thought and we can use all of the positive communication between each other we can find now days.

I am never offended by that comment.


42 posted on 09/22/2019 8:48:48 AM PDT by oldenuff35
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To: Inspectorette

“.....he could just stop wearing the cap.”

It isn’t that easy. People are trained to say things and through their personal expectations of themselves, they just do it. I’m willing to bet that better than half the time it isn’t sincere, it’s campy.

I’ve been retired and disabled (twice) now from active duty for about 25 years. I put that part of my life into the bin. I no longer do what I did. I rest now and the memories of it are mine alone as no one can really know what happened to me and those around me in my mind. I pulled on the uniform for my reasons, promoting the business and not myself, and don’t wish to celebrate it now.

I would want the people that realize it to be happy in their minds, just as sad as I am in mine. I won’t talk about the things I saw and did, they don’t need to thank me for it. It was a job same as being a cop, a fireman, or border patrol. Do the same people thank them when they see who they are? They play or played just as big a part in our security, and there’s is just as much a service.

I won’t be rude to someone for saying it again, but it isn’t that important to me now. And I wear nothing to advertise it.

If someone wants to celebrate military service for the troops, let your congressman/woman know the military member should get a 5% raise rather than 2.5%. Hire a vet when they separate. And the best thing you can do is when you befriend the family of a vet, invite them to your church, club, or an outing to something simple like to the park or your back yard bar-be-que with other families. And trying to help the family of a vet will be worshiped by that vet. Don’t tell them you are proud of them, show them.

rwood


43 posted on 09/22/2019 8:51:44 AM PDT by Redwood71
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To: bgill

I just nod and say Thank YOU!

Have found that mostly women, middle age and younger, a lot of teens with the ‘Thank you for serving’, and Vets including those in my age range (we are getting thinner in ranks) will come up with ‘Welcome Home’ and if recognizable by hat or license or stickers etc, a nod or ‘short wave’ (semi salute) while passing etc etc..

WE are still a small community and I believe that the greater majority of those that seek one out and ‘thank’ at least rate a ‘You’re Welcome’ or like I just say ‘Thank You’.

Also, as someone indicated, if one approaches you, you must have something on or about you that indicates you were/are Military, SO, if it ‘bothers’ you, don’t advertise.

Somewhat like the guy with a ‘Honk if you love Jesus’ bumper stickers giving one the finger if honked at.


44 posted on 09/22/2019 8:52:20 AM PDT by xrmusn (6/98"HRC is cast as the Grandmother that lures Hansel & Gretel to the pot")
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To: Bitman

Every time I hear it, I think “What? No tip?”.


45 posted on 09/22/2019 8:57:32 AM PDT by glorgau
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To: bgill

I spend half my year in the South and hear it very frequently. When I do I nod and say thanks. I’m secure in what I did; and don’t care what the next guy did or didn’t do. As a cop after the Marine Corps I was in true combat at least three times, but I guess that wouldn’t qualify as service to the guy who wrote this letter. I agree - don’t like being thanked - don’t wear the cap.
PS None of us joined to get a thank you and a free coffee fill up from a grateful man or woman at a truck stop but what is supposed to be the problem with it?


46 posted on 09/22/2019 8:59:52 AM PDT by jmaroneps37 (Conservatism is truth. Liberalism is lies.)
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To: NYleatherneck

WINNER!

Semper Fi.


47 posted on 09/22/2019 9:00:45 AM PDT by stylin19a (2016 - Best.Election.Of.All.Times.Ever.In.The.History.Of.Ever)
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To: All

HERE IS ALL YOU EVER NEED TO KNOW ABOUT THIS TRIVIAL AND OVERUSED PHRASE - WANNA KNOW WHO STARTED IT?

I WILL TELL YOU. I WAS AN ACTIVE DUTY OFFICER WATCHING ON LIVE TV WITH THE OTHER MEMBERS OF MY STAFF THE NEWLY INAUGURATED PRESIDENT-RAPIST SHAKING HANDS WITH GREETERS AT THE WHITE HOUSE FOLLOWING HIS INAUGURATION EARLY IN THE MORNING IN JANUARY 1993.

WHEN SEVERAL PORTLY CLEARLY OVERWEIGHT FEMALE UNIFORMED PERSONNEL CAME THROUGH THE LINE TO SHAKE HIS HAND -

*THE RAPIST* TOLD EACH ONE OF THEM “THANK YOU FOR YOUR SERVICE”.

THAT WAS THE FIRST TIME I HAD EVER IN MY LIFE HEARD SOMEONE SAY THAT TO AN ACTIVE DUTY SOLDIER(OR VETERAN).

NOW I HEAR IT ALL-THE-FREAKING TIME WHEN I TELL SOMEONE I AM A VET.

AND EVERY TIME I THINK OF THAT G-D, M-F, SOB, COCAINE SNIFFING, RAPING, BRIBE-TAKING, WITNESS-THREATENING, JUSTICE-OBSTRUCTING, WAR CRIMINAL SUBHUMAN.

But, its OK. You know why? Cause he lived too long. He lived long enough for EVERYONE to realize what and who he is.

And now he can’t show his cocaine-atrophied nose in public without someone calling him out on it.

Revenge is sweet....

... and that, folks, is THE REST OF THE STORY!!! ;>)


48 posted on 09/22/2019 9:02:20 AM PDT by Simon Foxx
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To: I want the USA back

Take the comments for what they express. They are wishing you well. Very few are going to help you cut the grass. Accept what you get.

**********

Although some of the time the ‘thank you’ is said in a perfunctory manner, its still nice to hear it. Especially when said in connection with a veteran’s store discount. :)


49 posted on 09/22/2019 9:02:33 AM PDT by Starboard
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To: bgill

I remember learning to keep my mouth shut about Nam back in the 70s because a lot of people believed the media narrative back then that all veterans were psychos, ready to explode. People would literally edge away from me if I was dumb enough to say I’d been there. This behavior went away for the most part later. Hollywood especially jumped on this band wagon since most movie directors and producers and such were draft dodgers. Thus we got garbage war movies like “Apocalypse Now” and the tradition continues with crap like “Jarhead”. These crudfest movies are more a statement of the makers’ cowardice and their need to feel better about their treason.

Anyhow a “thank you” is better than a poke in the eye with a stick even if it is usually pro forma. And these days it’s impossible to find a draft resistor. They all supported the war, to listen to them. Amazing!

Life is too short to worry about whether someone is sincere or not about thanking me. My conscience is clear, their’s aren’t. And there’s nothing to be gained with bad manners or stressing about things I can’t change. Besides, the cowards get to face the Judge some day. That’s enough for me.


50 posted on 09/22/2019 9:04:01 AM PDT by Seruzawa (TANSTAAFL!)
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To: bgill

I usually say “I know you’re not supposed to say ‘thank you’ but Thank you.”


51 posted on 09/22/2019 9:04:35 AM PDT by firebrand
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To: bgill

I wear my Air Force veteran hat everywhere I go and whenever I meet another veteran I like to say, “Thank US for OUR service!”

I see nothing wrong, nor am I in the least bit offended that fellow Americans recognize that there is something good in other Americans.


52 posted on 09/22/2019 9:06:22 AM PDT by Pilgrim's Progress (http://www.baptistbiblebelievers.com/BYTOPICS/tabid/335/Default.aspx D)
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To: KrisKrinkle

Er, the Artillery has had a pretty rough go from time to time.

In Vietnam there were no front lines. Truck drivers were as likely to get it as Infantry.


53 posted on 09/22/2019 9:09:34 AM PDT by Seruzawa (TANSTAAFL!)
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To: Savage Beast

I feel the same desire to thank President Trump for saving America—so far—from a nightmare just as terrible or perhaps worse.

*********

The fact that our fate as a nation seems to hinge on the force of one man’s personality and patriotism is very disconcerting. It says a lot about the present state of our country, and it isn’t good.

To your point, the uncomfortable reality is that Donald Trump is the only thing standing between us and tyranny.


54 posted on 09/22/2019 9:18:15 AM PDT by Starboard
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To: bgill

Here’s my opinion. Almost all letters to “Dear Abby” are fabricated or edited.


55 posted on 09/22/2019 9:20:16 AM PDT by SamAdams76
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To: bgill

I say it. I am not a veteran, but I am the son, nephew, cousin, grandson, etc of men who were. I wasn’t around in the Vietnam era, but I think the way some were greeted on their return was shameful and disgusting. I say it to be respectful.


56 posted on 09/22/2019 9:21:46 AM PDT by GenXteacher (You have chosen dishonor to avoid war; you shall have war also. Wall)
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To: bgill

He’s right prove your respect they gave to much not to.


57 posted on 09/22/2019 9:22:53 AM PDT by Vaduz (women and children to be impacIQ of chimpsted the most.)
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To: HighSierra5

“My son said that the Infantry is the Army. The rest are supply pukes.”

My Dad was Infantry in WWII, saw D-Day, Huertgen Forest, The Bulge and more.

Dad said it more generously that all other services, branches, and specialties ultimately support the Infantry.

When it was time to serve in Vietnam I chose Army aviation. Carried lots of `grunts’ around. My hat was off to them; we flew the guys in the field ice cream in mermite cans whenever we could.

As for being thanked, I don’t mind it a bit, or saying “welcome home bro” to a fellow vet (GEEZ! We all look like WWI vets now!!).

I didn’t buy a Vietnam cap until I was 65. Went into the most liberal place I could think of, Earthfare, looking for some aging ponytail of either sex to call me a babykiller (I still hate Jane Fonda).

All I got was “thank you for your service” and “this includes your 10% vet’s discount” at the checkout.

;^)


58 posted on 09/22/2019 9:26:22 AM PDT by elcid1970 ("The Second Amendment is more important than Islam.")
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To: The Antiyuppie
It’s a cliche and it’s thoughtless, the linguistic equivalent of those stupid ribbons people put on the backs of their cars.

Also reminds me of those suburban yard signs - almost always in the affluent, leafy suburbs - that state "Hate has no home here" or "No human being is illegal."

Invariably those yard signs are planted by hardened leftists who have zero tolerance for anybody with a conservative opinion on anything. They are among the most hateful and intolerant people you will ever run into. Also, if an illegal alien pitched a tent in their yard, they would call "911" faster than they planted that disingenuous virtue-signalling yard sign.

59 posted on 09/22/2019 9:30:45 AM PDT by SamAdams76
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To: Starboard
"the uncomfortable reality is that Donald Trump is the only thing standing between us and tyranny"

It appears that you're right about this; however, consider the strength of the American People who elected him.

Of course, he volunteered for the job--at enormous sacrifice to himself and his family--to save America because he believed that no one else could or would do it. For that alone, he is perhaps the greatest patriot and the greatest President America has ever produced.

There may be others just at puissant and as patriotic who have not yet come forth because of the enormity of the sacrifice that will be required--but who will if they must.

60 posted on 09/22/2019 9:31:21 AM PDT by Savage Beast (You'd think they'd learn from the Roadrunner Cartoons, but they just send off to Acme and try again.)
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