ABC's The Note: That SOB Knocked Me Down

ABC ^ | 3/19/04

[William McKinley]

(More on Snowboarding F'n Kerry)

ABC News Kerry campaign reporter "Diamond" Ed O'Keefe, who, (not) incidentally, looks hot in his ski gear, files this exclusive report from atop Bald Mountain in Idaho:

As Senator John Kerry carved his Burton snowboard down a green rated Upper College run, another skier interrupted his stride, colliding with the presumptive Democratic nominee at 9,010 feet.

The slope-cade of two Ski Patrollers, several Secret Service agents, two journalists, one camera and one Kerry aide suddenly came to a halt. The Massachusetts Senator lay on the ground, removed his Smith sunglasses, and surveyed the damage.

Assured that the ABC News camera accompanying the entourage had not captured Kerry's fall, the Senator glared at your sloping Noter and assured, "I don't fall down. That son of a bitch ran into me."

Alas, the Senator's private vacation in a very public place was filled with interruption. While Kerry took a break on the "Warm Springs" run, a woman stopped to shout, "We're from Oklahoma and we love you!" The Senator's breath-catching moment quickly became an irresistible Christmas card opportunity as the woman gathered her family around the still-sitting Senator.

A duty-bound husband sheepishly said while pointing to his camera, "Hey, can we, do you mind?" Before Kerry could weigh in, the man answered his own question observing, "I guess it's kind of your job." Fortunately for the Senator, the exchange just may pay off. When asked if he intends to vote for Kerry, the Oklahoman Noted, "After seeing him ski? Yeah."

But not everyone in the solidly red state of Idaho was pleased to see the president's opponent ride Sun Valley's Challenger chair lift.

While the Senator waved to light applause outside the base camp ski lodge, inside he was greeted by a quiet chant of "Bush, Bush!" All of which brings The Note to a weighty, serious, but in no way scientific or limited to this list analysis of a major issue of the day: Ketchum vs. Crawford.

[ConservativeMan55]

LOL!

I'd like to shake that Secret Service Agents hand!

[nopardons]

I'd like to kiss the SS man. :-)

[Texasforever]

The sad fact is that the SS agent's career is over if Kerry gets elected.

[nwrep]

I'd like to wash his feet with scented oil.

[Texasforever]

I would just like to give him 5 minutes alone with Kerry.

[beaversmom]

While Kerry took a break on the "Warm Springs" run, a woman stopped to shout, "We're from Oklahoma and we love you!"

Two months ago, this woman would have said, "Kerry who?" Now she's in love. Well he's only interested if you got lots of money, honey!

[MJY1288]

"I don't fall down. That son of a bitch ran into me."

What an arrogant arsewipe that Kerry punk is, he says he doesn't fall down, huh! Then who did he buy a Jock strap for.......... TaRaZa?

[Sola Veritas]

"Alas, the Senator's private vacation in a very public place was filled with interruption. While Kerry took a break on the "Warm Springs" run, a woman stopped to shout, "We're from Oklahoma and we love you!" The Senator's breath-catching moment quickly became an irresistible Christmas card opportunity as the woman gathered her family around the still-sitting Senator."

THE STATE OF OKLAHOMA DISTANCES ITSELF FROM THIS WOMAN AND HER STATEMENT....unfortunately she was allowed to breed before it was discovered she was a mental defective. On behalf of most of my fellow OKIES, I apologize we let these people leave the state while on parole.

[claudiustg]

---I'd like to wash his feet with scented oil.---

Only if you dry them with your hair! :^)

[beaversmom]

Can't wait until President Bush delivers a big KO in November.

[Brett66]

While Kerry took a break on the "Warm Springs" run, a woman stopped to shout, "We're from Oklahoma and we love you!"

Grrrr, I'm from Oklahoma and I'd like the see the traitor swinging from a tree!

[MJY1288]

Kerry looks like what Rush describes as a MetroSexual in his BunnyHop Snowsuit

[Texasforever]

I have this theory that Kerry and Janet Reno are brothers.

[Kakaze]

" The Senator's breath-catching moment quickly became an irresistible Christmas card opportunity "

Remind anyone of clinton, ala Ron Browns funeral ?

[Jean S]

Fortunately for the Senator, the exchange just may pay off. When asked if he intends to vote for Kerry, the Oklahoman Noted, "After seeing him ski? Yeah."

Oh please. How pitiful.

[Sola Veritas]

Wrong, they are sisters.

[1066AD]

Then who did he buy a Jock strap for..........
He needs one ?

[Quix]

Lord, God,

Please insure that this gets rubbed in Kerry's face every time he pretends so hollowly to take the 'high' road!!!

Give it fierce publicity far and wide!

In Jesus' Name.

[MJY1288]

Kerry has had at least three standing 8 counts in the first round, are you sure it will take to November to KO an already gravely wounded chump like John Kerry?

My guess is that John Kerry will be enlisting the help of a speech writer for his concession speech by mid September