Morford: What Are You, On Drugs?

San Francisco Chronic-le ^ | Wednesday, December 8, 2004 | Mark Morford (does not take her Thorazine orallly)

[manic4organic]

Attention! Do NOT eat the brown acid.

[dog breath]

Except for the occasional good pipe tobacco, cigar and alcohol, I like to think that I am part of the population that doesn't take any drugs. While your post was funny it is interesting how dependent on chemicals we, as a country, have become. You also should mention the huge amount of chemicals in our food and beverages . A person eats lots of flavorings and preservatives which are in a sense drugs that make our food edible. There are also traces of the drugs given to the livestock such as growth hormones and antibiotics in some meat.

[Popman]

BMI is complete Bullsh*t

Just checked my height and weight and calculated my BMI

To be considered normal, I think I was about 12 years old when I weight that little.

At 18, I had a BMI of 29.8. I was obese with a 34" waist?

No wonder half the country is considered overweight.

[dirtboy]

I guess Miss Morford thinks we should go back to the good ol' days when we didn't have these drugs and the life expectancy was 47. After all, why would he care? As a gay man, that's about what his life expectancy is.

[Old Professer]

He careers about like a deflating balloon at the catnival. It's his style.

[NeoCaveman]

Well we all know Ms. Morford is on crack....

[hobbes1]

Nevertheless, it bears repeating: maybe what's lacking most in this society is a true and thoughtful and nuanced connection to and understanding of the natural systems, soil and sunlight and sustainability, lunar rhythms and whole food and maybe knowing where the hell your water really comes from.

I just LIVE to run into some nut that actually lets a sentence like that out of their mouths....

[Old Professer]

Alright, who put the "T" that close to the "R"?

[E. Pluribus Unum]

I was obese with a 34" waist?

Yes.

Take a look at some old family pictures from the 'fifties or earlier.

Notice how skinny everybody looks?

That's because food was expensive in those days, and they did not eat for entertainment.

[xsmommy]

maybe it is keeping the AIDS virus at bay, morford.

[HenryLeeII]

WARNING: Ladies and children, please divert your eyes!

Hey, Morford, the odds are very good that you have someone's [deleted] up your [deleted]. Right now. This minute. As I type...

[Shellback Chuck]

Gee, I have a BMI of 24.4. And I've just had two doctors tell me I need to put on weight. I can't wait to tell them what fools they are!

[ArrogantBustard]

Morford is an ass, and I've flamed her up one side and down the other on many occasions.

But in between her homoerotic rhetoric and her pathological love/hate relationship with G. W. Bush, she has a valid point ... lots of folks are stuffed to the gills with drugs to treat conditions that might better be alleviated by lifestyle changes (like getting up off their fat arses and moving a bit), then with drugs to alleviate the side effects of the first set of drugs, then with drugs to alleviate the interaction effects of the first two sets, then ...

[ArrogantBustard]

Bwhahahahahaha!!! That's a sucker bet ...

[mountaineer]

Just because Mark couldn't survive without the HIV cocktail, why does he presume the rest of us are similarly drug dependent (and addled)

Mark Morford ('nuff said)

Q: Do you think you have any fans that are politically conservative? Judging from your feedback, it seems they do read you!

A: "Fans," no. "Masochists," maybe. I have many regular hate-mailers, as I'm sure do most columnists. I have many regular flamers who still surprise me and occasionally write in with "normally I disagree with everything you say, but this time, you really nailed it." It's an odd phenom. People hate you but read you religiously. These are the people who, every single day, are actively seeking something to piss them off. And nowadays, they are legion.

Q: Describe your writing style. It's unconventional, often not grammatical. What's your formula?

A: Oh, man. I know what I strive for, but I also know I have a long way to go. It's an evolution. I suppose I aim for one part DeLillo, one part David Foster Wallace, one part old Tom Robbins, one part stream of consciousness, one part Peets mocha, one part post-coital flush, one part orgasmic syntax abuse, one part nipple pierce for the AP style guide. It lives at the intersection of Divine and Ungodly. Where the long snake moan meets the cool intellectual margarita. Wry informed satirical thought-provoking absolutely essential effluvia to make you squirm and blush and laugh and sigh. I hope. I fail all the time. But that's just part of the process. more of this inanity

[webstersII]

Yeah, I've recently watched a family member get on the treadmill of taking one drug to combat something which was a lifestyle issue, then have to take another drug to combat side of effects of the first one, then wind up worse off than she originally was before taking the first drug!

[marsh_of_mists]

So Bush is responsible for excessive pill-popping now? EEEEVIL CHIMP FORCES PROZAC DOWN MY THROAT HURR!

Equally unsurprising is the fact that Morford seems to think taking meth and cocaine is no big deal:

"...we ain't talking pot or ecstasy or meth or fine cocaine or Bud Light or any of those oh-my-God-not-my-baby devil drugs that are so demonized by the government, but that by and large are no more (and are often far less) toxic and addictive and caustic..."

[RichInOC]

Markie, I know you are, but what am I?

[RichInOC]

And to tell the truth, the only things humping my brain stem and molesting my karma are those Lindsay Lohan pictures in my memory...