Just a Bun

The Northwest Inlander ^ | 3/8/18 | Mitch Ryals (as told by his bun)

[ProtectOurFreedom]

We're standing in line for coffee when out of nowhere, I get honked.

The lady behind us reached up, wrapped me up in her grubby paw and squeezed.

"Your man bun is so soft," she says to the man to whose head I'm affixed with a black elastic hair tie. "I've never touched one before."

An innocent compliment to most, but to me this violent assault is just another example of the indignities of my existence. I'm just a bun, after all. I didn't choose to be tied to a man. Women gawk and stare. Sometimes they'll shout: "Nice man bun, baby! Men comment, too: "Your man-bun game is strong today, bro!"

Other jeers have been more violent: "Cut your hair, you stinkin' hippie!"

It's been a year since the "man bun" Ken doll was released, but I'm still triggered when I think about the onslaught of bun-shaming on Twitter:

"The new 'Man Bun' Ken doll comes with shirt, shoes and keys to Barbie's car that he's driving until he 'gets back on his feet again,'" one user quipped. "I don't even own Mattel's new man bun Ken Doll but he already told me the dangers of processed food and how Bernie would have beaten Trump," another mused.

[Diana in Wisconsin]

[CodeToad]

Who? Those who have seen too many sword fighting movies and thing of themselves as some sort of shogun.

Hipsters are just nerds with facial hair and things like buns.

[CodeToad]

thing = think

[Diana in Wisconsin]

“I did, in college. In retrospect I probably looked like a douche.”

Please see my post 21.

Beau and I just had this discussion. We were watching basketball playoffs during lunch and one of the guys (Ray?) had a friggin’ Man Bun! I went off on a tirade about how GAY they are, etc.

Beau said, ‘So, you’re a Hairist (racist) when it comes to Man Buns, Eh?’

Damn Skippy I am! No. Nope. No! :)

[Diana in Wisconsin]

This poofter needs the matching sweat shirt!

[cyclotic]

No real man ever

[rlmorel]

Good God.

I just cannot stand it. I grit my teeth every time I see one of those.

[rlmorel]

Everyone goes through a stage where they do something that in retrospect, they wish they hadn’t done.

Eh. Fortunately, most cosmetic appearance things can be shrugged off to a degree.

[rlmorel]

LOL, I have a total chrome dome! But yeah...I had long hair in High School.

I just shaved it all off because it is so much easier to make it look reasonable. I kept my hair pretty short after I got out of the USN, but when I got older, my hair began to look somewhat moth eaten, and I couldn’t have a crewcut any more.

SO it all came off!

[Trillian]

Haha, ewwwww

[Tolerance Sucks Rocks]

No truly sane man wears a man bun. #Feminization

DANG!

[rlmorel]

[IronJack]

Man bun = Millennial fag badge.

[Old Yeller]

Hmmm. Who has a “man bun”?

Rob Gray, University of Houston basketball player.

[freedumb2003]

Any guy with a man bun should be slapped.

Repeatedly.

I don’t care if that is a violation of his rights or anything else. It just my visceral reaction when I see one.

Except maybe Samurai.

[Albion Wilde]

No truly sane man wears a man bun. #Feminization

Who are you calling insane?

[BlueLancer]

Except maybe Samurai.

Tank you velly much ...

[gogeo]

I think that settles it.

[CaliforniaCraftBeer]

[rlmorel]

LOL, I guess it does!