Posted on 02/24/2022 5:58:15 AM PST by mylife
If you were raised in northern New England, or spent any appreciable amount of time there, you already know what I am about to tell you: Beach pizza is a thing of local lore. There is some debate among people in my hometown — Newburyport, Massachusetts, a coastal city tucked between Boston and the New Hampshire border — about whether or not I, a person born in New York and raised in New England, should be allowed to identify as a Bay Stater. But when the conversation turns to pizza, my provenance becomes clear. I’m from New England. If I were not, I would not have a horse in this pizza race.
In the lengthy annals of pizzadom, New England beach pizza is little more than a blip on the carbohydrate radar; a connoisseur might deem beach pizza objectively bad. Cooked in sheet trays, it has a barely perceptible crust, an even less prominent dusting of cheese, and an overly sweet sauce that owes its flavor profile to Prego. Hold a square in your hand and you’ll be reminded, somewhat nostalgically, of an Ellio’s slice. There is wafer-thin crust and crunch, and your inevitable impatience to take a chomp out of it will be repaid with a burnt roof of the mouth, because waiting for perfectly imperfect things is difficult. For an extra 50 cents, the pizzaiolos at Cristy’s and Tripoli Pizza Bakery, the two rival vendors who produce this species of pizza, will melt an extra disk of provolone onto your slice. This is not great pizza. And yet, somehow, it is.
(Excerpt) Read more at eater.com ...
It is a Greek inspired meat sauce.
If you slot it into that category it is tasty.
It is a Greek inspired meat sauce.
If you slot it into that category it is tasty.
So go ahead. Eat the bad pizza. The kind, uniformed souls who man the windows will ask if you want a corner slice or an interior slice (you want one of each), if you want toppings (you do not), and whether or not you desire extra cheese (you definitely do). When your two slices appear, appallingly hot, provolone circle dripping, they’re scuttled onto overlapping paper plates.
You will burn your mouth. If you do not burn your mouth, you are doing this whole thing wrong. Bad pizza requires sacrifice, and your thin-skinned upper palate is the willing supplicant. Lean back on an unclean bench, overlooking not the ocean, but the median, where there are cigarette butts and assorted ephemera — summer garbage. It will not feel beautiful, necessarily, but somehow, molten pizza in hand, it will feel sacred.
everything out of massatwoshits is turd-rate.
looks ok
Im from Mass, this is not really a thing
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I agree. Sounds like somebody who forgot to do their homework and made something up at the last second. All based on the Seabrook / Hampton Beach area.
FWIW, the author slandered Tripoli’s by putting them in the conversation. Their pizza and bakery items are good. Christy’s is absolute garbage.
But as this was not my childhood food I will say that there is lots of good food on this planet.
I have to restrain my self from eating to much of it.
I think I will pass on the not good stuff.
I’m on the North Shore south of Newburyport.
Never heard of beach pizza and by the looks of that abomination I wish it stayed that way.
Thanks for nothing!😉
On the South Shore there is a thing called bar pizza which I have heard of but never tried it
its good on beef hotdogs with onions and mustard ;P
You would be surprised at how many people do not realize that mustard and onion are vital to the right flavor balance.
Aside from the Provolone, it sounds like the same pizza you would get from the old box pizza mixes that I remember from the 80’s.
it just works!!
Whole belly is the only way to have them!
amen!
If it does, then it's not pizza. Put the pineapple in a bowl off to the side ...
Simply existing doesnt make it relevant or newsworthy...see?
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